Haram relationship struggles

[anonrxxxaq]

Salam hope everyone is well and in good health In Shaa Allah.

I am a 21 year old female living in England, i have completed my studies Alhamdulillah and whilst at university I met a young man (aged 22) at first we were good friends as we had the same friendship group. As time went on we became more than friends and our friendship blossomed into a haraam relationship.
Prior to this I was always against haraam relationships, I explained this to him and even told him that if we were together it would be for the long haul and SubhanAllah I really wanted to marry him (he also has intentions of marrying me).
At first we used to hold hands, from that we started slowly progressing towards kissing and now we commit sins that make me sick to my stomach. He has touched my private areas and I have touched his. I understand why relationships are haraam now and every time I vow that I will stop these acts I end up doing them again.
I feel disgusted within myself and it makes me so sad knowing that I was once someone that stayed away from any type of haraam act and now I am committing them every day.
He is not as practicing as me but Alhamdulillah he does try, I know people will say leave him but it is not as easy as that.
I am practicing, I pray I make dua every day that I am forgiven and pray that Allah swt saves me from shaytans whispers.
I love him a lot, we are planning to get our Nikkah done in December In Shaa Allah.
We have just finished university and have started jobs Alhamdulillah therefore we have not been able to do this sooner.
He has met my family and I have met some of his it’s just a case of getting them to ask for my rishta.
I am struggling brothers and sisters I request that you all make dua for me and make dua that I am able to overcome these desires and that Allah swt assists us in making our relationship halal.
Please if anyone could provide me with the correct advise to repent and feel at ease I would really appreciate it.
JazakAllah Khairun.

[Abu julaybeeb]

Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “When a person repents, Allaah rejoices more than one of you who found his camel after he lost it in the desert.” (Agreed upon. Narrated by al-Bukhaari, no. 6309)

“And whoever does evil or wrongs himself but afterwards seeks Allaah’s forgiveness, he will find Allaah Oft Forgiving, Most Merciful” [al-Nisaa’ 4:110]


Say: O ‘Ibaadi (My slaves) who have transgressed against themselves (by committing evil deeds and sins)! Despair not of the Mercy of Allaah, verily, Allaah forgives all sins. Truly, He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful”[al-Zumar 39:53]

“Truly, Allaah loves those who turn unto Him in repentance and loves those who purify themselves”[al-Baqarah 2:222]


“And He it is Who accepts repentance from His slaves, and forgives sins, and He knows what you do”[al-Shooraa 42:25]

Allaah spreads out His Hand at night to accept the repentance of those who did wrong during the day, and He spreads out His Hand during the day to accept the repentance of those who did wrong during the night. (This will continue) until the sun rises from the west.” (Narrated by Muslim, no. 2759)

“O you who believe! Turn to Allaah with sincere repentance! It may be that your Lord will expiate from you your sins, and admit you into Gardens under which rivers flow (Paradise)” [al-Tahreem 66:8


make dua ask for forgiveness
feel guilty about your sin
and never commit the sin again

so stay away from him
No more chatting chilling cut off everything

Ibn Qayyim wrote "some of the Salaf (predecessors) said, "Sins lead to Kufr (disbelief) just as kissing leads to sexual intercourse, singing (music) leads to Zina (illegal sexual intercourse), an unlawful look leads to Ishq (infatuating love) and illness leads to death." (Spritual Diseases and it's Cure

if he aint practising dont marry him your only gonna have problems after marriage
especially if he doesnt pray all his salah
U can see on the forum from past threads how many people have had problems in marriage