we should write a letter to them saying i was a devoted wagon wheel eater for break times, take that crap out!Originally Posted by Da prince emcee
Custard Creams
Bourbons
Choc chip cookies
Shortbread
Pink Wafers
Chocolate Viennese
Rich Tea
Digestive
Chocolate Digestive
Nice
Malted Milk
Caramel Biscuit
Crackers
Breadsticks
Biscuit on bottom of cheesecakes
All biscuit is good biscuit!
Other…
Don't like biscuits...
Jammy Dodgers
Hob Nobs
we should write a letter to them saying i was a devoted wagon wheel eater for break times, take that crap out!
nope, haven't even touched them, well I have but shhh, they're in the kitchen right now, going to smuggle em into my room
now thats what i call self-control... well done bro
just don't ask what happened to them tmrw
now thats what i call self-control... well done brothey might go missing
i most certainly did not kill a packet of jaffa cakes!!!
The biscuit brothers are recruiting...
If anyone feels that they are worthy of the Biscuit Brotherhood then you may apply for membership. All entries must be submitted by 14 June 2005. This short deadline has been set due to the expectation of the overwhelming replies which will take the whole of next year to process. All late entries will be rejected!
Please reply to BiscuitBrothers@hotmail.co.uk
If your application is a complete joke, then do not be amazed at a reply asking "are you taking the biscuit?" and also do not take this as a joke, because we are not LAUGHING.
On passing the first stage of entry, you will be undergoing many practical tests at biscuit eating and will be assessed on efficiency, style, versatility, dipping, dunking, and many other prerequisites for the position.
Looking forward to interacting with you hopeless Biscuit Brothers challengers...
Simmy & Moshy
The Biscuit Brothers
Joint CEOs
Last edited by simmy; 13-06-05 at 01:37 PM.
do you have to be a 'brother' to join the 'brotherhood'?
Last edited by Salman Al-Farsi; 13-06-05 at 01:59 PM. Reason: email address changed in the quote upon legal grounds.
I m not a big fan of biscuits so.. I might just start a 'muffin order'.. of course all bros and sis will be welcome as long as they have a unique muffin liking
"The objective behind Shari'ah is to liberate individuals from his desires in order to be a true Abd (slave) of Allah and that is the legitimate Maslaha... Violating the Shari'ah under the pretext of following Maqasid al-Shari'ah is like the one who cares about the spirit without the body and since the body without the spirit is useless therefore the spirit without the body is useless too." ~ Imam Shatibi - The greatest intellectual founder of Maqasid al-Shari'ah
Something for all applicants to consider before entering, we will not take responsibility for any of the possible/likely mishaps:Simmy & Moshy
- Broken Noses
- Burnt Noses
- Broken Jaw
- Swollen Throat
- Operations which may result from any biscuits being stuck in the throat. etc
The Biscuit Brothers
Joint CEOs
Last edited by simmy; 13-06-05 at 01:37 PM.
Your request has been filed and will be addressed as soon as biscuitly possible. Thank you for your time and co-operation.do you have to be a 'brother' to join the 'brotherhood'?
Simmy & Moshy
The Biscuit Brothers
Joint CEOs
Your request has been filed and will be addressed as soon as biscuitly possible. Thank you for your time and co-operation.I m not a big fan of biscuits so.. I might just start a 'muffin order'.. of course all bros and sis will be welcome as long as they have a unique muffin liking
Simmy & Moshy
The Biscuit Brothers
Joint CEOs
Dear Mr Salman Al-Farsi,I m not a big fan of biscuits so.. I might just start a 'muffin order'.. of course all bros and sis will be welcome as long as they have a unique muffin liking
We have received reports you plan to set up an organisation referred to as the 'muffin order'. Please be aware that this market is a monopoly and we will destroy any attempts you make in trying to enter the market.
Please note that this crazed domination of the market has nothing at all to do with any similar companies, the likes of McDonalds, who would never dream of crushing their competition or violating any laws.
Please feel free, however, to apply for the Biscuit Brotherhood at BiscuitBrothers@hotmail.co.uk clearly stating your reasons for wanting to join our super-duper awe-inspiring organisation. We'd like to thank you for taking an interest in our company.
Yours Insincerely,
Simmy & Moshy
The Biscuit Brothers
Joint CEOs
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what about heart bypasses...liposuction...stomach stapling....lung stabiliser thingy's which may needed as a result of obesity from eating too many biscuits?
Your request has been filed and will be addressed as soon as biscuitly possible. Thank you for your time and co-operation.
Simmy & Moshy
The Biscuit Brothers
Joint CEOs
Thanks for the speedy response.
I would like to take this oppertunity to assure you that 'the muffin order' is a secret society which does not believe in entering the public domain.
"The objective behind Shari'ah is to liberate individuals from his desires in order to be a true Abd (slave) of Allah and that is the legitimate Maslaha... Violating the Shari'ah under the pretext of following Maqasid al-Shari'ah is like the one who cares about the spirit without the body and since the body without the spirit is useless therefore the spirit without the body is useless too." ~ Imam Shatibi - The greatest intellectual founder of Maqasid al-Shari'ah
Dear Ms Hafsah Amatullah,do you have to be a 'brother' to join the 'brotherhood'?
Thank you for your question regarding the gender of the members of the Biscuit Brotherhood and your general interest in the best company on the Planet. We at Biscuit Brothers take immense pride in what we do and so we should as it is an amazing job. Hence, it is for this reason that we have a rigorous initiation process by which prospective members are sifted from the filth.
Your question is a common one and we have received such remarks from the likes of Chained_Water who is also desperate to join our wonderful organisation. At this moment in time, I regret to inform you that we do not have positions on the board for non-brothers although rest assured we are looking into expanding our horizons and a decision is expected shortly following our AGM.
There are, however, other executive positions available for you including the highly sought after biscuit-maker position and the ever popular tea-lady position. All applications are welcome through BiscuitBrothers@hotmail.co.uk.
Yours Insincerely
simmy & moshy
The Biscuit Brothers
Joint CEOs
PS. We are well-known campaigners for women's rights and will accept no slander upon our moral guidelines.
Last edited by Salman Al-Farsi; 13-06-05 at 02:03 PM. Reason: On the order of the secret society of the Muffin order.
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i think you'd be perfect for that role moshy(wo)man!!!
Your request has been filed and will be addressed as soon as biscuitly possible. Thank you for your time and co-operation.
Simmy & Moshy
The Biscuit Brothers
Joint CEOs
Dear Hafsah Amatullah,
Following your slanderous remarks on the gender of one of our CEOs, we have consulted our legal team and have been advised to seek further legal advice. Following an improptu board meeting, we have decided to take legal action against yourself and any other members who dare to challenge anything in regards to our company. We are ruthless in our aims and will not settle for anything less than the highest punishment in the courts of law.
We look forward to suing you for every penny and biscuit you possess.
Simmy & Moshy
The Biscuit Brothers
Joint CEOs
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just finished the last pack *brushes the crumbs of her lap* ... and broke..but your company can pay of my overdraft if u like
Your request has been filed and will be addressed as soon as biscuitly possible. Thank you for your time and co-operation.
Simmy & Moshy
The Biscuit Brothers
Joint CEOs
PS. You didn't offer us any biscuits??!! Ate 'em all by yourself...
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your gonna pay my overdraft?Your request has been filed and will be addressed as soon as biscuitly possible. Thank you for your time and co-operation.
Simmy & Moshy
The Biscuit Brothers
Joint CEOs
PS. You didn't offer us any biscuits??!! Ate 'em all by yourself...so sweet mashaAllaah...that'll mean you won't be able to buy biscuits for a long time!maybe i'll send u a homemade baked cheesecake
i wanna join
Knowledge and intelligence leads one who possesses it to do good acts and prevents him from evil.
Ignorance on the other hand, calls the one who is ignorant to conform to his desires, even if it is harmful to him.
Send us an email and we'll get back to you... tell us your qualifications and what you know about biscuits...i wanna join
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i own the uk buicuit co-operation plus i can bake the best home made fudge cookies ever
Knowledge and intelligence leads one who possesses it to do good acts and prevents him from evil.
Ignorance on the other hand, calls the one who is ignorant to conform to his desires, even if it is harmful to him.
Email << You don't who's listening here on the forum... we have many rivals... please include your credit card details and a standing order for Ł5/month membership...i own the uk buicuit co-operation plus i can bake the best home made fudge cookies ever
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cant be too careful,btw i thought the fee was waived for me
Knowledge and intelligence leads one who possesses it to do good acts and prevents him from evil.
Ignorance on the other hand, calls the one who is ignorant to conform to his desires, even if it is harmful to him.
No, my colleague and I especially raised the fee for you...cant be too careful,
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whateverNo, my colleague and I especially raised the fee for you...
im coimg into the businessa merger may be on the way watch ur back bro
Knowledge and intelligence leads one who possesses it to do good acts and prevents him from evil.
Ignorance on the other hand, calls the one who is ignorant to conform to his desires, even if it is harmful to him.
CWater Graphics Ltd already attempted to merge/takeover with BB, but we booted their bid into no-man's land... the only way for you to merge is you get a 51% stake in the business and considering Simmy owns 50% and I own the other half, you will not succeed. Which is why we haven't offered shares to anyone else yet and we don't plan to...whatever
im coimg into the business
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mergers dont nessercerrily happen by consent bro did you not do business studies??
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> .watch this space
Knowledge and intelligence leads one who possesses it to do good acts and prevents him from evil.
Ignorance on the other hand, calls the one who is ignorant to conform to his desires, even if it is harmful to him.
I did business studies at GCSE but it was the one lesson I bunked, last thing on a friday afternoon with a boring old fogey teaching us... bring it on...mergers dont nessercerrily happen by consent bro did you not do business studies??
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> .watch this space
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im up for a challenge
dont mess with mei have legal contacts who will destroy you for every buiscuit and crumb you own
Knowledge and intelligence leads one who possesses it to do good acts and prevents him from evil.
Ignorance on the other hand, calls the one who is ignorant to conform to his desires, even if it is harmful to him.
You can bring all your lawyers, judges, riff-raff...im up for a challenge
dont mess with me :mujadida: i have legal contacts who will destroy you for every buiscuit and crumb you own
I have one Lionel Hutz, on my side, be afraid...
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Biscuit on bottom of cheesecakes
It is obvious that the manager Moshyman can not even bother to look up the right type of biscuit and must resort to using comments such as the above as an option. The name you were looking for is 'plain digestive' if you would like to sue me then best i inform you now...i have nothing.
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it's not biscuitly possible for you to not own anything, our lawyers will be in touch!
Simmy & Moshy
The Biscuit Brothers
Joint CEOs
It is biscuitly possible....it's called being broke, or skint...how ever you like to phrase it.
Mystique
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OFFICIAL BB letter
Dear loyal forummers,
It is with a heavy heart that I answer recent speculation regarding a Biscuit Brother. I must confirm that Simmy is indeed a Class A freshie and one of the freshiest around. I should have noticed this earlier, especially from the fact I did not understand a word he spoke (I thought it was a Brum accent) and the trail of oil smeared from his hair along the factory walls. His shalwar kameez and love for ironing also passed by me unnoticed.
This freshiness goes against BB policy and it is with a sad heart that I must hereby disassociate the Simmy (or Simran as the sister is better know as) from all future BB productions.
Yours Moshy,
Moshyman
Biscuit Brother
Sole-Owner
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For every sane member of the forum, please refer to the the freshy(Mushy) thread for my response to this Woman
I'm still waiting for your resignation Mushy!
Simmy
Biscuit Brother
Sole-Owner
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already a breakdown of the biscuit brotherhood....how predictable
obviously 'someone' wanted all the biscuits for themselves
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