Register

If this is your first visit, please click the Sign Up now button to begin the process of creating your account so you can begin posting on our forums! The Sign Up process will only take up about a minute of two of your time.

LIVE Arabic Classes with Abu Mus'ab Wednesday 8:30PM GMT skype: ummahradio Show Details here

Listen Online:www.ummahradio.com
DOWNLOAD THE APP

 

Note: All classes are still on the old times of GMT, not GMT +1 a.k.a. BST, with the exception of the Tafseer Class, for that will be done at 7:30pm GMT, or 6:30pm GMT+1/BST

Ads by Muslim Ad Network

Results 1 to 21 of 21
  1. #1
    New Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Posts
    20
    Rep Power
    10

    Question Is Handshaking with the opposite sex is allowd in Islam?

    Assalamu Alaikum WRWB,

    Mr. X (male) is a friend of mine and is a very good dayee, al hamdulillah. He is also a good journalist, good speaker and good writer. He has given hundreds of quran classes and speeches in various small/big gatherings. He has translated several islamic books from urdu to other languages. Al hamdulillah he is a good muslim.

    Whenever the dawah programs are arranged for westeners, both gents and ladies from western community attend these programs. Sometimes after the programs, ladies from the western communities wish to shake hand with this brother appreciating his presentation, speeches etc. Now for example the situation comes that these ladies almost streched their hands forward to shakehand with Mr. X the dayee, what the brother has to do? Whether he can shake hands with them or is there any ideas that through which this brother (dayee) can avoid handshaking with the opposite sex i.e. western community ladies?

    Your feedback on the above point is best appreciated.

    May Allah guide us in the right path.

    Jazakallahu Khairan,

  2. #2
    CFS party representative.
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Posts
    8
    Rep Power
    10
    Dont take my objective point of view for granted, but here's my own opinion. Whether or not it abides by the teachings of the Quran, I don't know.... but --

    I think the whole "rule" stems from sexuality. In the Quran, i think the rule mgiht have been created as a precaition against lust.

    As for shaking hands... I think it would be outright silly to be prohibited from shaking hands with someone due to their gender. Does the Quran really say otherwise?

    As long as your intentions are not full of lust and you truly respect the person you are shaking hands with.. Then there's nothing wrong with it.

    Keep in mind this is only my personal opinion, as an "objectively-minded" non-muslim.

  3. #3
    Senior Member Unknown mc 1's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    In a house
    Posts
    297
    Rep Power
    10
    its not alowed......the prophet(pbuh) said it is better for you to have a steel nail driven through the centre of your head than to touch the palm of a strange women.
    Please Re-update your Signature

  4. #4
    Odan slmz :)'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    on your screen
    Gender:
    Girl Female
    Posts
    2,020
    Rep Power
    13
    seriously?? sum ppl say that its ok as long as the women covers her hands eg: gloves ... or sumthing like that as long as theres no 'fancying' btween them.. i dunno!!
    the more i learn; the more i learn of my ignorance.
    ~ imam shafi'i

  5. #5

    Account Disabled
    Supernova Nebula's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Gender:
    Girl Female
    Posts
    11,599
    Rep Power
    0
    The ruling on touching non-mahram women is that it is haraam, during Ramadaan and at other times, whether that is touching with the hand only or actions that are more serious than that, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "If one of you were to be stabbed in the head with an iron needle, that would be better for him than his touching a woman who is not permissible for him." Narrated by al-Tabaraani in al-Kabeer, 486; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’, 5045.
    http://63.175.194.25/index.php?ln=eng&ds=qa&lv=browse&QR=38153&dgn=4


  6. #6

    Account Disabled
    Supernova Nebula's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Gender:
    Girl Female
    Posts
    11,599
    Rep Power
    0
    The Ruling on Shaking Hands between Men and Women
    <TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=2 width="100%" border=0><TBODY><TR vAlign=top><TD width=90>Author:
    </TD><TD>Imaam 'Abdul-'Azeez Ibn Baaz
    </TD></TR><TR vAlign=top><TD>Source:
    </TD><TD>Magazine of the “Islamic University” [Issue 2, 1390H]
    </TD></TR><TR vAlign=top><TD>Translator:
    </TD><TD>isma'eel alarcon
    </TD></TR><TR vAlign=top><TD>Produced by:
    </TD><TD>al-manhaj.com
    </TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE>
    <TABLE class=pagesPrintBg cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width="100%" border=0><TBODY><TR><TD width="70%"></TD><TD align=right width="30%"> </TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE>
    <TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width="100%" border=0><TBODY><TR vAlign=top><TD class=bodytext>Question: “It has become very common amongst us in these days, when a man goes away on a journey and then returns, a group of women from his “group” come to him and greet him and kiss him and so on, during the days of ‘Eid, such as ‘Eid-ul-Fitr and ‘Eid-ul-Adhaa. Is this permissible?”



    Answer: It is well known from evidences in the Qur’aan and the Sunnah,[1] that a woman must not shake hands with or kiss a male that is not a mahram to her, whether it is an occasion of celebration or when arriving from a journey or for any other reason. This is because the woman is ‘awrah (i.e. she must be covered) and a fitnah (i.e. a source of temptation). So she must not touch a man that is not considered a mahram [2] to her, regardless if it is her cousin or someone distant from her. And she must not kiss him or he kiss her.



    We do not know of there being any difference of opinion amongst the scholars regarding the prohibition and rejection of this matter. This is because it is from the things that cause fitnah (trials and tests) and it is from the means that lead to what Allah has forbidden from the lewd and shameless acts and the customs that oppose the Divine Legislation. It is not permissible for the Muslims to remain upon these customs and to stay attached to them. Rather they must abandon them and fight against them. And they should give thanks to Allaah for having blessed them with knowledge of His Laws and for enabling him to abandon what angers Him.



    Allaah sent the Messengers – at the head of whom was our prophet Muhammad – to call the people to single Allaah out in worship and to obey His commandments, and to abandon what He forbade and to fight against the evil practices (of old).



    So it is obligatory to abandon such a practice (of shaking hands). And it is sufficient to give the greetings with speech, without touching or kissing. And there is much sufficiency in what Allaah has legislated and permitted for us over what He forbade and disallowed. Also, the greeting must be done while the woman is wearing the Hijaab, especially with the young females, because uncovering the face is not allowed. This is due to it being from the greatest part of a woman’s beauty that Allaah has forbidden her to expose, where He says: “And let them not expose their beauty, except to their husbands or their fathers or their husbands’ fathers…” [Surah An-Noor: 31]



    And Allaah says in Surah Al-Ahzaab:
    “And if you ask them concerning a matter, then ask them from behind a veil (Hijaab). That is purer for your hearts and for their hearts.” [Surah Ahzaab: 53]



    And He says: “Say to your wives and your daughters and the believing women to let them draw (from) their jilbaabs, (placing it down) all over themselves. That is better that they be known (as free women), and so that they won’t be molested. And Allaah is All-Forgiving, the Bestower of Mercy.” [Surah Al-Ahzaab: 59]



    And He says: “And the Qawaa’id (old women past age of child-bearing), who do not expect wedlock, there is no sin on them if they discard (i.e. take off) their (outer) garments, without doing so in a manner so as to show off their adornment immorally (tabbaruj). But if they refrain from doing that, this is better for them. And Allaah is the All-Hearer, All-Knower.” [Surah An-Noor: 60]



    The “Qawaa’id” here refers to old barren women. Allaah explains that there is no sin on them if they decide to remove their outer garments from off their faces and such, so long as they do not do it in a manner in which they would be exposing their beauty wrongly. But continuing to wear the veil is better for them, due to what it offers from distancing her away from fitnah.



    And if they are going to expose their beauty wrongly, then they must not take off their outer garment, but instead continue to veil, even if they are old barren women.



    So from all of this, we come to know that the young women are obligated to wear the Hijaab, by way of the veil, in all situations, whether they would be exposing themselves improperly or not. This is because the fitnah that can be caused by them and the danger of their unveiling is greater.



    And since Allaah has forbidden the women from unveiling, then forbiddance of touching and kissing (male strangers) takes greater precedence. So it is an obligation to abandon all of this and warn against it, and to advise one another to abandon it. May Allaah direct all of us to what pleases Him and protect us from the things that bring about His Anger. Verily, He is the Most Magnanimous, Most Generous.


    </TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE>


    <HR color=#999999 SIZE=1>Footnotes:

    [1] Translator’s Note: From the several ahaadeeth clearly prohibiting shaking hands between men and women not related to each other (i.e. not mahaarim) are: The Prophet (saws) said: “That a man get struck with an iron needle in his head is better for him than that he touches a woman that is not permissible for him (to touch).” [Reported by At-Tabaraanee, Al-Bayhaqee and others and Imaam Al-Albaanee authenticated it in Silsilat As-Saheehah (1/447-448)] And the Prophet (saws) said: “Indeed, I do not touch the hands of women.” [At-Tabaraanee in Al-Mu’jam-ul-Kabeer (24/342) and authenticated in Saheeh Al-Jaami’ (no. 8054)] And ‘Aa’ishah (raa) said about the Prophet: “I swear by Allaah! The hand of a woman never touched the hand of Allaah’s Messenger – rather he would take the oath of allegiance from the women verbally.” [Saheeh Muslim (3/1489)]

    [2] Translator’s Note: A mahram is a man a woman is permitted to uncover in front of, such as her husband, brother, father and all those other males mentioned in Surah An-Noor (24: 31).

  7. #7
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    London
    Gender:
    Boy Male
    Posts
    540
    Rep Power
    10
    On a more practical note (there, of course being fatwa that say shaking hands is permissable if you don't personally believe it will cause fitnah (cf Qaradawi/Turabi)), I would say a good thing to do would be to have a handkerchief in his right hand at that point. Generally works.

    Failing that, put a hand on his chest and incline of the head.
    Please Re-update your Signature

  8. #8
    New Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Posts
    20
    Rep Power
    10
    Quote Originally Posted by Unknown mc 1
    its not alowed......the prophet(pbuh) said it is better for you to have a steel nail driven through the centre of your head than to touch the palm of a strange women.

    After the dawah programs/gatherings, when the western ladies stretch their hands forward towards the brother (dayee) to shake hands with him, can you pls tell me how the brother can escape/avoid from shaking hands with them? What he can tell to them?

  9. #9
    Nice doggy... yorkshireman's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    is key
    Posts
    3,883
    Rep Power
    13
    Quote Originally Posted by Q8_123
    After the dawah programs/gatherings, when the western ladies stretch their hands forward towards the brother (dayee) to shake hands with him, can you pls tell me how the brother can escape/avoid from shaking hands with them? What he can tell to them?
    He could explain that he is concerned that shaking their hand may lead to fornication, possibly within minutes, so he would rather not take the risk. They might look at him a little :eek2: however.
    Please Re-update your Signature

  10. #10
    The Forgotten Shadow Kaiser's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    Posts
    6,453
    Rep Power
    18
    Ive never heard that shaking hands has ever lead to any of this.
    Please Re-update your Signature

  11. #11
    Nov 02 - Mar 07 *Salaam* Mr_Jailer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Location
    UK
    Gender:
    Unspecified
    Posts
    4,372
    Rep Power
    24
    This reminds me of a situation where I bumped into a sister in town who I hadn't seen for weeks (she used to work where I work).

    Upon seein' each other lol... this was hillarious... she told me later she was gonna hug me... cos thats what sisters do when they meet another one they hadn't seen for a long time...

    But she realised she couldn't hug me, so she extended her hand for me to shake. I declined and said 'shouldn't shake hands'.

    Then out of the blue she swings and smashes the back of her right forearm into my tummy... OUCH

    OUCH... told her 'good that I hadn't eaten anythin''. I was embarassed don't know who was watchin' lol.

    But it was funny, bless her.
    Rabbana atinaa fidDunya hasanatan wa fil Akhirati hasanatan wa qinaa adhaban Naar

  12. #12
    CFS party representative.
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Posts
    8
    Rep Power
    10
    Now I wonder, with conditions so extreme, how is anyone supposed to express genuine feelings for another person when that actually is their motive? Granted, it takes a lot more than just shaking hands to win a lady's heart, but if everything more risqe' than a handshake is forbidden, how is one supposed to ever find a wife?

  13. #13
    Senior Member Unknown mc 1's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    In a house
    Posts
    297
    Rep Power
    10
    Q8123 if this women is a muslim who wants 2 shake hands then just decline saying its not permissible if shes kuffar just politley signal ur guesture.
    Please Re-update your Signature

  14. #14
    Senior Member Unknown mc 1's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    In a house
    Posts
    297
    Rep Power
    10
    Quote Originally Posted by Kaiser
    Ive never heard that shaking hands has ever lead to any of this.
    In that case u obviously aint herd tha story of bariisa
    Please Re-update your Signature

  15. #15
    ام روان cheeky's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Gender:
    Girl Female
    Posts
    4,761
    Rep Power
    29
    shaking hands wiv opposite sex...hmm ive been these situaitions alot..alhamdulillah i always manage to get out of it...my answer depends on who they are..once a science teacher at school wanted to shake hands..n cus he's got a dirty rep..i just put ma hand behind ma bak n sed 'I dont think so sir' and walked out :s ....another time sum pervert guy on the bus was being sick so i got annoyed and was gettin off a million stops early n he wanted to shake hands..i just sed sorry..against ma religion..pushed passed him n got off. The one time i shook hands wiv sum1 is wen i was told a teacher was looking for me...and then the next min this teacher is literally in my face...bumped into him n i was introduced to him n he lterally grabbed my hand n i was like *sigh*

    ok so how do sisters avoid shaking hands wen they are graduating?..

  16. #16
    TALIB UL-ISLAAM ay1404's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    in a kufr country
    Posts
    139
    Rep Power
    10
    Everytime a sis tries to shake my hand I say the hadith about the nail being pushed through ur hand and then say "its better if we dont shake" but i try and make it as unawkward as possible.... with non-muslim women i just refuse point blank to shake.
    Please Re-update your Signature

  17. #17
    Odan mouse's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    in a house
    Gender:
    Girl Female
    Posts
    6,869
    Rep Power
    20
    Quote Originally Posted by yorkshireman
    He could explain that he is concerned that shaking their hand may lead to fornication, possibly within minutes, so he would rather not take the risk. They might look at him a little :eek2: however.
    and consider him very optomistic lol

  18. #18
    CFS party representative.
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Posts
    8
    Rep Power
    10
    Quote Originally Posted by cheeky
    ok so how do sisters avoid shaking hands wen they are graduating?..
    You can still get your diploma even if you don't participate in the ceremonies.

    Besides, there's probably something wrong with having a ceremony that isn't Muslim-related anyway.

  19. #19
    ~**~**~**~**~**~ ze leetle elper's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2003
    Gender:
    Girl Female
    Posts
    28,692
    Rep Power
    129
    Ya know, anyone who makes an excuse that they cannot avoid shaking hands is just making EXCUSES.

    I have been in MILLIONS of situations where a male has extended his hand to me. It could be the first day of work, meeting a new collegue, whilst studying at Uni-- whatever the circumstance, you can just explin briefly to the person that it is unseemingly that you as a Muslim woman should be shaking hands with a male. In my experiences (and believe me there are many) once I make it clear I am not meaning to be offensive towards the person, they are quite understanding and considerate about this. Sometimes it can even lead to furthur dialogue and help the person query about other 'Islamic' issues that may have been on their mind (and considering most of their information about Islam is from TV/ media... this dialogue can be truly enlightening for that person)

    Also in terms of graduating or ceremonies, it is perfectly acceptable to make a request beforehand that your hand is not shaken whilst collecting your degree...and many sisters have done this. The result?

    Well it ranges from the guy handing you your degree whilst palm to heart bowing to you whilst presenting your certificate and the best one I have heard so far which was the guy removing his hat, and doing a little jig before presenting the diploma

    What does 'freedom' mean?

    Does the eagle want to swim in the sea,
    Restricted by the sky?

    Does the fish want to dance on the wind,
    Not enough river to explore?

    Yet the sky is freedom for the bird
    but death for the fish,

    The sea is wide for the fish
    but will engulf the bird.

    We ask for freedom but freedom to do what?
    We can only express our nature as it was created.

    The prayer mat of the earth is freedom,
    freedom from slavery to other than the One,
    Who offers an shoreless ocean of love to swim in
    and a horizon that extends to the next life,

  20. #20
    ام روان cheeky's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Gender:
    Girl Female
    Posts
    4,761
    Rep Power
    29
    lol at the guy at the graduation ceromony...well ive heard of sisters who wen he extends his hand..the extend theirs too but only to put a sweet in his hand

    And like u sed sis ze, ppl who make excuses about not being able to avoid situations like this..well yeh they are making excuses!

  21. #21
    Yunis Al-Nasser's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Gender:
    Boy Male
    Posts
    15,598
    Rep Power
    51
    alhamdulilah we are concerned with such issues and still cautious not to fall in it while other Muslims already proceed to "does sleeping with a non Muslim from the opposite sex after Iftar in Ramadan invalidate my fast?" stage

    sorry....they don't ask....they do it and say that it is pretty much halal
    My toughest fight was with my first wife.

    Muhammad Ali Clay


Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
All times are GMT. The time now is 01:05 PM.
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.2.2
Copyright © 2014 vBulletin Solutions, Inc. All rights reserved.
Super PM System provided by vBSuper_PM v1.2.0 (Lite) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2014 DragonByte Technologies Ltd.
vBulletin Skin By: PurevB.com

MPADC.com Islamic Web Hosting | Muslim Ad Network | Islamic Nasheeds | Islamic Mobile App Developement Android & iPhone
Omar Esa Nasheed Artist
| Omar Esa Nasheeds | Islamic Web Hosting : Muslim Designers : Nasheeds : Labbayk Nasheeds : silk route jilbab: Hijab: : Web Islamic Newsletter: Islamic Web Hosting

Hijabs Online | Hijabs | Hijab Shop | Hijab Shop : Treasure of The Scholars