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  1. #1
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    Has this ever happened to you? OR have you ever done this to anyone?

    Salams everyone

    Hope you're all having a lovely day.

    So, I got a message from a brother, Muslim of course, who had been communicating with me for about a day in regards to getting to know each other.

    He was nice to talk to you, we never did talk about anything inappropriate, just basic things like family, questions etc. It was simple, but it was nice.

    I can't say I was soo interested in him, he wasn't ugly, or anything, there just wasn't enough attraction there.

    So, about 2 days or so go by and I haven't once messaged him, honestly, I had forgotten pretty much all about the guy, but it seems like he hadn't forgotten about me lol.

    So he basically goes on to tell me I am lacking in conversational skills and its quite pathetic that I haven't at least tryed to get to know him.


    I find I have done this quite often, more so just unintentionally, like I'll just totally forget about someone I have no interest in talking to further, and just blank them or give small polite replies.

    It seems a little cowardly but I'd rather not be like, 'Im not interested in you', why? because it comes across as though there is something wrong with them when their totally isn't you know? but I'd rather help them get the message themselve lol is this bad?

  2. #2
    اصبر aynina's Avatar
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    Re: Has this ever happened to you? OR have you ever done this to anyone?

    "There wasnt enough attractiin"

    There shouldnt be any before marriage, you only get to know how is his islam his akhlaq his manhaj and if it is good you will live him after marriagr
    يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلنَّاسُ ٱعْبُدُوا۟ رَبَّكُمُ ٱلَّذِى خَلَقَكُمْ وَٱلَّذِينَ مِن قَبْلِكُمْ لَعَلَّكُمْ تَتَّقُونَ

    O mankind, worship your Lord, who created you and those before you, that you may become righteous

    Surah Al Baqarah ayah 21

  3. #3
    VERSION : Alpha 6.6 Aetos's Avatar
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    AW: Has this ever happened to you? OR have you ever done this to anyone?

    Quote Originally Posted by SisterTA View Post
    Salams everyone

    Hope you're all having a lovely day.

    So, I got a message from a brother, Muslim of course, who had been communicating with me for about a day in regards to getting to know each other.

    He was nice to talk to you, we never did talk about anything inappropriate, just basic things like family, questions etc. It was simple, but it was nice.

    I can't say I was soo interested in him, he wasn't ugly, or anything, there just wasn't enough attraction there.

    So, about 2 days or so go by and I haven't once messaged him, honestly, I had forgotten pretty much all about the guy, but it seems like he hadn't forgotten about me lol.

    So he basically goes on to tell me I am lacking in conversational skills and its quite pathetic that I haven't at least tryed to get to know him.


    I find I have done this quite often, more so just unintentionally, like I'll just totally forget about someone I have no interest in talking to further, and just blank them or give small polite replies.

    It seems a little cowardly but I'd rather not be like, 'Im not interested in you', why? because it comes across as though there is something wrong with them when their totally isn't you know? but I'd rather help them get the message themselve lol is this bad?
    Well if it was me I would feel better if you told me straight up,than leaving me like that.We men dont like being ignored.And its better to say what is wrong about them so they can fix it in the future In shaa Allah.

    I also wanted to add that,you did good that you didnt accept this one.You have communicated only a day and he says it is pathetic and that you lack in conversational skills? What?
    What would he say after 10-20 years if you got married?

    Thats my opinion
    'A slave's life is all you understand, you know nothing of freedom. For if you did, you would have encouraged us to fight on, not only with our spears, but with everything we have'

  4. #4
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    Re: Has this ever happened to you? OR have you ever done this to anyone?

    Quote Originally Posted by aynina View Post
    "There wasnt enough attractiin"

    There shouldnt be any before marriage, you only get to know how is his islam his akhlaq his manhaj and if it is good you will live him after marriagr

    Sister, there has to be attraction there on both sides.

    Islam aside, you must feel attracted to the individual if you're going to decide to marry him/her.

  5. #5
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    Re: Has this ever happened to you? OR have you ever done this to anyone?

    Walaikum asalaam

    You should be honest and just tell them you are not going to take matters further. You don't have to give them reasons why but it would be nice for the other person to know you won't be communicating anymore.

    You don't have to say I am not interested in you. Just say I don't think I meet your requirements or something along those lines. Say it it's like you are the reason and not them. I hope you understand what I am trying to say!

  6. #6
    اصبر aynina's Avatar
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    Re: Has this ever happened to you? OR have you ever done this to anyone?

    Quote Originally Posted by SisterTA View Post
    Sister, there has to be attraction there on both sides.

    Islam aside, you must feel attracted to the individual if you're going to decide to marry him/her.
    You said he wasnt ugly so what type attraction u mean
    يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلنَّاسُ ٱعْبُدُوا۟ رَبَّكُمُ ٱلَّذِى خَلَقَكُمْ وَٱلَّذِينَ مِن قَبْلِكُمْ لَعَلَّكُمْ تَتَّقُونَ

    O mankind, worship your Lord, who created you and those before you, that you may become righteous

    Surah Al Baqarah ayah 21

 

 

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