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View Poll Results: Adoption?

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  • Yes I would adopt

    7 58.33%
  • No I wouldn't adopt

    1 8.33%
  • Maybe

    4 33.33%
  • I have already adopted

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Thread: adoption

  1. #1
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    adoption

    A little while ago I was volunteering in a kindergarten and I found that my attention was focused on the kids in the class with parental issues. I could see that these issues were really affecting the kids and I found that those kids clung to me like I was their parent. It made me think about all those kids out there who don't have any parents or anyone to love and support them. I'm still not to sure about it though. Also any potential spouse I might have might not be open towards adoption. I understand that in islam you cannot adopt a child and claim it as your own but I would just wan't to help the child have a better life.
    What are your thoughts on this issue?

  2. #2
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    Re: adoption

    I think it's a noble thing to adopt an orphan child. You never know sis, I think a lot of muslims are open to the idea. Just make sure to discuss it prior to the marriage contract, if it's something you're seriously considering.

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    Re: adoption

    SubhanAllah, it is good to see that people still consider the plight of the orphans, etc.

    I recall hearing about more than 1 pious predecessor (of the past) who used to run an orphanage. This is a very noble work indeed.

    OP I can understand how your heart must hurt seeing these suffering children, but perhaps take baby-steps and volunteer as much of your time to an existing orphanage first.

    Get used to the challenges first before making a big commitment.

    InshaAllah you will be granted immense reward for your sacrifice.

  4. #4
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    Re: adoption

    Quote Originally Posted by aelmo View Post
    A little while ago I was volunteering in a kindergarten and I found that my attention was focused on the kids in the class with parental issues. I could see that these issues were really affecting the kids and I found that those kids clung to me like I was their parent. It made me think about all those kids out there who don't have any parents or anyone to love and support them. I'm still not to sure about it though. Also any potential spouse I might have might not be open towards adoption. I understand that in islam you cannot adopt a child and claim it as your own but I would just wan't to help the child have a better life.
    What are your thoughts on this issue?
    There are issues around the child not being a mahram to one of the adoptive parents, and making sure the child knows it's lineage, i.e you cannot claim the child is your own, but yes if I was wealthy enough to be able to afford a house big enough I would love to adopt or foster kids.
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    Re: adoption

    Quote Originally Posted by Gingerbeardman View Post
    There are issues around the child not being a mahram to one of the adoptive parents, and making sure the child knows it's lineage, i.e you cannot claim the child is your own, but yes if I was wealthy enough to be able to afford a house big enough I would love to adopt or foster kids.
    I know. If I did adopt I wouldn't claim that it was my child and I would let the child know that I wasn't it's real mother. But I would still love and support it like it was my own, of course.

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    Re: adoption

    Quote Originally Posted by horizon View Post
    SubhanAllah, it is good to see that people still consider the plight of the orphans, etc.

    I recall hearing about more than 1 pious predecessor (of the past) who used to run an orphanage. This is a very noble work indeed.

    OP I can understand how your heart must hurt seeing these suffering children, but perhaps take baby-steps and volunteer as much of your time to an existing orphanage first.

    Get used to the challenges first before making a big commitment.

    InshaAllah you will be granted immense reward for your sacrifice.
    Yeah that's probably true. But I find that there is only so much you can do with just volunteering. My kindergarten experience taught me that.
    It is definitely something I am thinking about for the future. Not necessarily now.

  7. #7
    islamreligion.com eesa the kiwi's Avatar
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    Re: adoption



    When I was a teenager I was in trouble with the cops alot. They knew if I was bailed to my parents I'd continue breaking curfew and getting up to no good so i was put in a foster home

    The home was pretty abusive. The lady had gang affiliations and was also having an open sexual relationship with one of the foster kids. Alhamdulilah she never tried nothing on me but it was a really messed up situation

    Be worth adopting to ensure the kid was raised in a good home and not become an abuse statistic wether violent or otherwise (nz has one of the worst child abuse rates in the world so it's common here for foster kids to get treated appallingly )
    Last edited by eesa the kiwi; 24-09-17 at 09:51 AM.
    It may not be easy, you may not understand it, but you need to have the Imaan to trust Allah when life doesn't make sense.
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    Re: adoption

    Quote Originally Posted by eesa the kiwi View Post


    When I was a teenager I was in trouble with the cops alot. They knew if I was bailed to my parents I'd continue breaking curfew and getting up to no good so i was put in a foster home

    The home was pretty abusive. The lady had gang affiliations and was also having an open sexual relationship with one of the foster kids. Alhamdulilah she never tried nothing on me but it was a really messed up situation

    Be worth adopting to ensure the kid was raised in a good home and not become an abuse statistic wether violent or otherwise (nz has one of the worst child abuse rates in the world so it's common here for foster kids to get treated appallingly )
    One of the main reason's why I am thinking about adoption is because child abuse especially sexual abuse is so relevant in the world today. I know that saving one kid from that fate wouldn't do much but it's a start.

  9. #9
    Senior Member MuslimThinker's Avatar
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    Re: adoption

    Quote Originally Posted by aelmo View Post
    A little while ago I was volunteering in a kindergarten and I found that my attention was focused on the kids in the class with parental issues. I could see that these issues were really affecting the kids and I found that those kids clung to me like I was their parent. It made me think about all those kids out there who don't have any parents or anyone to love and support them. I'm still not to sure about it though. Also any potential spouse I might have might not be open towards adoption. I understand that in islam you cannot adopt a child and claim it as your own but I would just wan't to help the child have a better life.
    What are your thoughts on this issue?
    Its a reward helping to take care of children etc.
    In my opinion, usually those who adopt are those who are unable to have children. Hence they adopt. (But not necessarily all)
    For those who have children of their own, I think it may become an issue if they mix etc. (if of the opposite gender) and perhaps other matters.
    So considerations have to be made before the adoption, like thorough.

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    Re: adoption

    Quote Originally Posted by MuslimThinker View Post
    Its a reward helping to take care of children etc.
    In my opinion, usually those who adopt are those who are unable to have children. Hence they adopt. (But not necessarily all)
    For those who have children of their own, I think it may become an issue if they mix etc. (if of the opposite gender) and perhaps other matters.
    So considerations have to be made before the adoption, like thorough.
    I have thought about that a lot. I would love to have my own family some day and I know that some people may not be okay with adoption and putting a child that is not theirs in their house, and I completely understand that. But I would hope that I could find a way to still be able to personally help an orphaned child.

  11. #11
    Senior Member MuslimThinker's Avatar
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    Re: adoption

    Quote Originally Posted by aelmo View Post
    I have thought about that a lot. I would love to have my own family some day and I know that some people may not be okay with adoption and putting a child that is not theirs in their house, and I completely understand that. But I would hope that I could find a way to still be able to personally help an orphaned child.
    That's a good thought Alhamdulilah. I think I've heard also there are still many kids out there who still need people to adopt them.
    Such is the situation.
    Oh, come to think of it, There is also a hadith that was mentioned by the Prophet with regards to taking care of orphans.
    But i think there are circumstances to that or something.

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    Re: adoption

    Quote Originally Posted by MuslimThinker View Post
    That's a good thought Alhamdulilah. I think I've heard also there are still many kids out there who still need people to adopt them.
    Such is the situation.
    Oh, come to think of it, There is also a hadith that was mentioned by the Prophet with regards to taking care of orphans.
    But i think there are circumstances to that or something.
    Yeah I heard of that hadith. If I do adopt someday I will follow the rules and practices that the prophet put in place regarding this issue, Inshallah.

  13. #13

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    Re: adoption

    Quote Originally Posted by aelmo View Post
    I have thought about that a lot. I would love to have my own family some day and I know that some people may not be okay with adoption and putting a child that is not theirs in their house, and I completely understand that. But I would hope that I could find a way to still be able to personally help an orphaned child.
    The practicalities of the living-situation are what I think about. How do you discipline that child? Do you treat them equal to your real children or show them more mercy/compassion? Do they remain as part of your family once you are old and they are living their own lives? etc. etc.

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    Re: adoption

    Quote Originally Posted by horizon View Post
    The practicalities of the living-situation are what I think about. How do you discipline that child? Do you treat them equal to your real children or show them more mercy/compassion? Do they remain as part of your family once you are old and they are living their own lives? etc. etc.
    I personally don't think that I would have it in me to treat a child I adopt as lesser then my own children. I think you need to look at the situation. Some kids don't like people who feel pity on them. I heard that some of the kids are like that in the orphanages where I live.
    My parents raised me to be aware of the less fortunate out there, and I hope I can raise my children to understand that there are some kids out there who may require more attention then others. So if I did adopt a child who needed more compassion, than hopefully my other children would understand why at times I may focus more time on the adopted child. Of course I wouldn't give my own kids any less attention.
    Also I think that if you are going to commit to adopting a child then you should be in it for the long run. Even in the future you should still support them and let them know that you will be there for them if they ever need anything. I don't think it would even be possible to take care of someone their entire life and then completely let them go when they are older.
    But that's just what I think. I am sure that other people may see the issue differently.

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    Re: adoption

    Quote Originally Posted by aelmo View Post
    I personally don't think that I would have it in me to treat a child I adopt as lesser then my own children. I think you need to look at the situation. Some kids don't like people who feel pity on them. I heard that some of the kids are like that in the orphanages where I live.
    My parents raised me to be aware of the less fortunate out there, and I hope I can raise my children to understand that there are some kids out there who may require more attention then others. So if I did adopt a child who needed more compassion, than hopefully my other children would understand why at times I may focus more time on the adopted child. Of course I wouldn't give my own kids any less attention.
    Also I think that if you are going to commit to adopting a child then you should be in it for the long run. Even in the future you should still support them and let them know that you will be there for them if they ever need anything. I don't think it would even be possible to take care of someone their entire life and then completely let them go when they are older.
    But that's just what I think. I am sure that other people may see the issue differently.
    This is precisely why many good-intentioned people may be hesitant. There is so much to think about.

    Allah Make it Easy for us and Allah have Mercy on the orphans.

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    Re: adoption

    Quote Originally Posted by horizon View Post
    This is precisely why many good-intentioned people may be hesitant. There is so much to think about.

    Allah Make it Easy for us and Allah have Mercy on the orphans.
    Inshallah. Ameen.

 

 

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