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  1. #1
    New Member ShamsQamar's Avatar
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    Women seeking a religious marriage, what are you looking for in a man

    Girls who are practicing and want an islamically-oriented marriage, who would be fine with staying at home (not working) or even only leaving with your husband as a guardian, who want lots of kids and to be active in the local muslim community (gatherings/events that are halal), a practicing religious husband who will get you up for fajr, who have no problem wearing niqab... i read Lots of comments and threads on here seems like a lot of guys want this kind of girl. I definitely do.

    But I'm asking those girls directly, I know there must be many here, what kind of man do you want? What are your requirements and what are the deal breakers? What are your expectations, what are you more flexible with? How should a man be if he wants a woman like you?

  2. #2

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    Re: Women seeking a religious marriage, what are you looking for in a man

    Didn't even give salams smh

  3. #3

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    Re: Women seeking a religious marriage, what are you looking for in a man

    Quote Originally Posted by ShamsQamar View Post
    Girls who are practicing and want an islamically-oriented marriage, who would be fine with staying at home (not working) or even only leaving with your husband as a guardian, who want lots of kids and to be active in the local muslim community (gatherings/events that are halal), a practicing religious husband who will get you up for fajr, who have no problem wearing niqab... i read Lots of comments and threads on here seems like a lot of guys want this kind of girl. I definitely do.

    But I'm asking those girls directly, I know there must be many here, what kind of man do you want? What are your requirements and what are the deal breakers? What are your expectations, what are you more flexible with? How should a man be if he wants a woman like you?
    Used to be a lurker but I made an account, so I'll answer. Even though I am not active in the community, I do strive very hard to meet the other requirements Alhamdullilah. Here is what I am looking for not necessarily in order:

    1. Must take the 5 pillars very seriously
    2. Sense of Humour
    3. Good looking
    4. Decent Income (Enough for both of us and our children since I'll be staying at home, bonus points if we can save a little every month for emergencies)
    5. Warm, kind, compassionate
    6. Not too older than me, willing to be with someone if they are a little younger than me.
    7. Tall

    Dealbreakers (Apart from the obvious ones like no prayer etc):
    8. Poor Hygiene
    9. Shorter than me (I'm not exactly a giant so this requirement can be met by 99.9% of men)
    10. Drinking, Smoking (Even Hookah)
    11. Previous relationship history
    12. Couch Potatoe
    13. Doesn't like my cooking
    14. Asexual (Been seeing a lot of asexual men on this forum for some reason or is it confirmation bias. Lol )

    By the way, before some brothers come in and blast me for being too picky this is my idealistic take on the matter. I'm willing to compromise a little on everything except points 1,3,4,13 and 14.

  4. #4
    I wonder Ya'sin's Avatar
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    Re: Women seeking a religious marriage, what are you looking for in a man



    I wanna know too, where are the girls

    nobody wants to marry a mug, that's a deal breaker

    no one likes a plank head or a lazy muppet with nutcasism taking over his life

    ideally someone who is determined, ambitious, go getter, and pious

    if I were you i'd just go on indeed.com and your list is there, it's what every employer looks for excluding the salary

    I think so

    all the best
    'Whatever it be wherein ye differ, the decision thereof is with Allah: such is Allah my Lord: In Him I trust, and to Him I turn.' The Holy Qu'ran Al Shura (Consultation)

    So, which of the favours of your lord will you deny? ~ Surah Ar Rahman

  5. #5
    I wonder Ya'sin's Avatar
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    Re: Women seeking a religious marriage, what are you looking for in a man

    Quote Originally Posted by Abu Jarir View Post
    Didn't even give salams smh


    some people are so picky they'll reject you if you don't salam them

    it's called spoilt for choice, one mini slip up and that's one potential out of the door

    'Whatever it be wherein ye differ, the decision thereof is with Allah: such is Allah my Lord: In Him I trust, and to Him I turn.' The Holy Qu'ran Al Shura (Consultation)

    So, which of the favours of your lord will you deny? ~ Surah Ar Rahman

  6. #6
    Odan Abu julaybeeb's Avatar
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    Re: Women seeking a religious marriage, what are you looking for in a man

    Normally you shouldnt salaam the opposite gender unless it is a group your giving salaam to

    So some may actually not salaam to avoid fitna

  7. #7
    Odan Abu julaybeeb's Avatar
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    Re: Women seeking a religious marriage, what are you looking for in a man

    Although when talking to a potential in a halal environment I dont know whether you should or shouldnt salaam

  8. #8
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    Re: Women seeking a religious marriage, what are you looking for in a man

    Quote Originally Posted by Abu julaybeeb View Post
    So some may actually not salaam to avoid fitna
    Hahaha
    Was this supposed to be a joke?

  9. #9
    Odan Abu julaybeeb's Avatar
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    Re: Women seeking a religious marriage, what are you looking for in a man

    No not at all

  10. #10
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    Re: Women seeking a religious marriage, what are you looking for in a man

    Quote Originally Posted by Abu julaybeeb View Post
    No not at all
    To me, it was a good one :-)
    Anyway, how could a public salam make fina on a public forum to everyone?

  11. #11
    Odan Abu julaybeeb's Avatar
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    Re: Women seeking a religious marriage, what are you looking for in a man

    No u didnt understand me

    Im saying for example if 2 people were talking for marriage and they were in a halal environment with mehrams being there but the 2 people were allowed to talk seperately

    Now one person could avoid salaam just to avoid the fitna of lust occuring then again it might be better to salaam toshow that you have akhlaaq in greeting people

    It was just a thought lol

  12. #12
    Umm Kulthoom Rumaysah~'s Avatar
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    Re: Women seeking a religious marriage, what are you looking for in a man

    Quote Originally Posted by Ya'sin View Post


    I wanna know too, where are the girls

    nobody wants to marry a mug, that's a deal breaker

    no one likes a plank head or a lazy muppet with nutcasism taking over his life

    ideally someone who is determined, ambitious, go getter, and pious

    if I were you i'd just go on indeed.com and your list is there, it's what every employer looks for excluding the salary

    I think so

    all the best
    it wouldn't even be appropriate lol
    what a weird thread
    شَكَوْتُ إلَى وَكِيعٍ سُوءَ حِفْظِي
    فَأرْشَدَنِي إلَى تَرْكِ المعَاصي
    وَأخْبَرَنِي بأَنَّ العِلْمَ نُورٌ
    ونورُ الله لا يهدى لعاصي

  13. #13
    "رَوْحٌ وَ رَيْحَان" Tayoofa's Avatar
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    Re: Women seeking a religious marriage, what are you looking for in a man

    I will answer the first question lool

    what kind of man do you want?


    حَدَّثَنَا هِشَامُ بْنُ عَمَّارٍ، حَدَّثَنَا يَحْيَى بْنُ حَمْزَةَ، حَدَّثَنَا زَيْدُ بْنُ وَاقِدٍ، حَدَّثَنَا مُغِيثُ بْنُ سُمَىٍّ، عَنْ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ عَمْرٍو، قَالَ قِيلَ لِرَسُولِ اللَّهِ ـ صلى الله عليه وسلم ـ أَىُّ النَّاسِ أَفْضَلُ قَالَ ‏"‏ كُلُّ مَخْمُومِ الْقَلْبِ صَدُوقِ اللِّسَانِ ‏"‏ ‏.‏ قَالُوا صَدُوقُ اللِّسَانِ نَعْرِفُهُ فَمَا مَخْمُومُ الْقَلْبِ قَالَ ‏"‏ هُوَ التَّقِيُّ النَّقِيُّ لاَ إِثْمَ فِيهِ وَلاَ بَغْىَ وَلاَ غِلَّ وَلاَ حَسَدَ ‏"‏ ‏.‏



    It was narrated that ‘Abdullah bin ‘Amr said:

    “It was said to the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ): ‘Which of the people is best?’ He said: ‘Everyone who is pure of heart and sincere in speech.’ They said: ‘Sincere in speech, we know what this is, but what is pure of heart?’ He said: ‘It is (the heart) that is pious and pure, with no sin, injustice, rancor or envy in it.’”

    Sunan Ibn Majah Book 37, Hadith 4356

    Grade:Sahih
    ("Verily, the Shariah is founded upon wisdom and welfare for the servants in this life and the afterlife. In its entirety it is justice, mercy, benefit, and wisdom. Every matter which abandons justice for tyranny, mercy for cruelty, benefit for corruption, and wisdom for foolishness is not a part of the Shariah even if it was introduced therein by an interpretation") Ibn Al Qayyim may Allah have mercy on him

  14. #14
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    Re: Women seeking a religious marriage, what are you looking for in a man

    Quote Originally Posted by ShamsQamar View Post
    Girls who are practicing and want an islamically-oriented marriage, who would be fine with staying at home (not working) or even only leaving with your husband as a guardian, who want lots of kids and to be active in the local muslim community (gatherings/events that are halal), a practicing religious husband who will get you up for fajr, who have no problem wearing niqab... i read Lots of comments and threads on here seems like a lot of guys want this kind of girl. I definitely do.

    But I'm asking those girls directly, I know there must be many here, what kind of man do you want? What are your requirements and what are the deal breakers? What are your expectations, what are you more flexible with? How should a man be if he wants a woman like you?
    Won't "those girls" also be filled with utmost hayaa and be mindful of how much or what they share online? And to be frank, you will - hopefully- be marrying just one of the many and not the many out here so instead of asking what these girls think, wouldn't it be better to ask a potential what she thinks about so and so in real life?

  15. #15
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    Re: Women seeking a religious marriage, what are you looking for in a man


  16. #16
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    Re: Women seeking a religious marriage, what are you looking for in a man

    Assalam o Alykum All,
    May be I am wrong but I think, now most of us have changed our objective of life and in the past man and woman both were taken all actions in the light of Islam.
    There are two major objective of life according to Quran (1) To learn and follow Islam (2) spread Islam to Muslims and Non Muslims both.
    It is our believe that currently for whole world no one messenger is present and no one new messenger will come even. Our beloved prophet Muhammad SAS is the last and final messenger for rest of the world. That is why, Allah SWT Has chosen all of us either Muslim or Muslima for the work of our beloved prophet Muhammad SAS.
    In below trail, I didn't see that any woman demand a person "I WOULD LOVE TO GET MARRY IF SOME ONE FOLLOW AND SPREADING ISLAM AND SPENDING HIS LIFE FOR THIS WORK"

    I do not stop anyone to see other things as well but piety should be our most important priority either for man or woman.. And specially when we are going to choose a man. Because mostly women changed their styles according to their husband's nature.
    Pray for me as I am also searching a woman for my life in presence of my first. wife.

  17. #17
    Combating Coconuts in UF
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    Re: Women seeking a religious marriage, what are you looking for in a man

    Quote Originally Posted by Radiator View Post
    Why do you keep mentioning that name?
    Stop being apologetic to Kuffars!

    If I don't engage with you or reply to any of your question, it's likely because I find you racist and a total waste of time.

  18. #18
    Odan
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    Re: Women seeking a religious marriage, what are you looking for in a man

    Quote Originally Posted by Abdell View Post
    Why do you keep mentioning that name?
    She was trying to figure out how mentions work.
    I thought she only did it once.

 

 

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