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  1. #1
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    new here-struggling sister

    AsSalaamu Alaykum brothers and sisters.

    am new here. I am really struggling right now. I reverted in 2011 and at first I was practising as good as I could Alhamdulillah. now I am struggling with everything. I have been through a lot since then including an abusive marriage abroad as I reushed into getting married hoping my husband would help me increase my imaan and be around a muslim community. this didn't happen and currently have a 3yr old child living with my non muslim family starting a divorce process. I struggle reciting salah still and just generally my practicing is not great. I make dhikr constantly everyday. I just feel like because I cant recite the words of salah good I feel disconnected at the time you should be most connected to Allah (SAW) but I feel so connected making Dua in English. I have contacted the local mosque regarding my situation and the imam is helping me regarding divorce but because I live 2hrs away from the mosque I have limited support. there is no community were I live. my family don't accept my religious choice and are so happy that my marriage has ended in divorce 'so I can find a nice local guy' I have told them this will not be happening unless the 'guy' is also muslim.

    I am now 25yrs old and worry that I wont be able to remarry as a divorced single mother. I am so lonely I just want to move away but have no option to currently, I am embarrassed about my situation and worried about my child and I's future and deen.

    is anyone in a similar situation or is it just me?

    jazakAllah Khairan for reading this.
    wa Salaam

  2. #2
    Internal Screaming shay5's Avatar
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    Re: new here-struggling sister

    Sorry to hear what you went through, divorced women with or without children get remarried all the time...focus on yourself and your child, get your affairs in order and make sure you are emotionally ready to move on

    Allah, subhanahu wata'aala, is the creator of mankind and therefore knows his nature more intricately than mankind himself. Allah, subhanahu wata'aala, has therefore chosen for us a religion best suited to the nature of mankind, a religion that goes neither to the extremes of hardship nor of laxity, but instead provides a middle path; in other words, a religion of ease. Allah, subhanahu wata'aala, said;

    "Allah intends for you ease, and does not want to make things difficult for you" [2:185]; and "Allah does not want to place you in difficulty" [5:6].

    Such easiness is well explained in the hadeeth reported by Abu Hurairah, radiya Allahu 'anhu, that the Prophet, salla Allaahu 'alaihe wasallam, said, "Religion is easy..." [Bukhari], he also said; "The best of your religion, is the easiest." [Ahmad]

    The easiness of this religion was put into practise by the best of humanity, the one who came to deliver the message, as Allah, subhanahu wata'aala, said;

    "Verily there has come unto you a Messenger from amongst yourselves, it grieves him that you should suffer any difficulty, he is anxious for you, for the believers he is full of pity and merciful" [10:128]

    This understanding is clarified in a hadeeth in which the Prophet, salla Allaahu 'alaihe wasallam, said; "… Allah did not send me to be harsh, or cause harm, but He sent me to teach and make things easy" [Muslim]. This understanding is further implemented by the mercy sent to mankind, Muhammed, salla Allaahu 'alaihe wasallam, in the hadeeth reported by his noble and pure wife, 'Aishah, radiya Allahu 'anhu, who said; "Whenever the Prophet, salla Allaahu 'alaihe wasallam, has a choice between two matters, he would choose the easiest, unless it is sinful (act)" [Bukhari].

    Many hadeeths have been reported on the matter of easiness: "Allah likes for this nation ease and hates for it hardship and adversity." [Tabaraani].

    "We have been given a privilege over other nations... .we have been given verses that no one else has been given, the last two verses of Surah Baqarah(chapter 2)"Our Lord! Punish us not if we forget or fall into error. Our Lord! Lay not on us a burden greater than we have strength to bear" After each statement, Allah responded by saying, "I did, I did, I did"" [Muslim].

    To further emphasise this understanding to his companions, when once a Bedouin stood up and started urinating in the mosque, the people caught him; but he, salla Allaahu 'alaihe wasallam, ordered them to leave him and to pour a bucket or a tumbler of water over the place where he had urinated. The Prophet, salla Allaahu 'alaihe wasallam, then said, "You have been sent to make things easy and not to make them difficult" [Bukhari].

    An example that illustrates this point is Salah, an act so important and vital to Islam that the Prophet, salla Allaahu 'alaihe wasallam, said; "Between a person and disbelief is discarding prayer" [Muslim]. He also warned against leaving salah, even at the time of his death, in his very last breaths before departing from this world.

    Yet in this worship Allah has also prescribed easiness. At first, the number of prayers was fifty in number, but they were reduced several times until they were five. Then it was proclaimed 'O Muhammad, the order is not changed. These five are (equal in reward) to fifty' [Tirmidhi].

    Causes of hardship
    If Islam is a religion of ease, why do we find many Muslims not practising it? Why do we find them doing very little of what they ought to be doing, and why do even those who practise their religion sometimes find it difficult?

    There are reasons why the practice of Islam can becomes hard:

    1) Lack of piety
    When we speak about Islam being easy we are, in reality, speaking about the easiness of its acts of worship and morals. Religion by definition means commitment and an obligation to a master. Therefore, being a religious person means to be always aware that we are slaves to a master, Allah, subhanahu wata'aala.

    From here we see the mistake of those who want 'ease' to mean 'doing nothing', just saying "I am a Muslim", committing themselves to nothing. It is obvious that they want it to be easy, but what exactly do they want? They want an easy life, a life without any religious practices.

    The idle belief of 'existing only to live' has long ago been negated by Allah, subhanahu wata'aala. He said:

    "Do you think you have been created for nothing and that you will not be resurrected and brought back to Allah again!" [23:115]. He also said: "Thinks man that he is left aimless?" [75:86].

    Islam is easy to practice; but those who do not understand the reasons behind their existence, who do not understand the concepts of religion, but meanwhile are striving to secure themselves in this life; then surely they will find its practices difficult.

    The easiness of Islam is felt in all of its commandments. Some people find this or that commandment hard to follow but this does not mean that the command is in itself hard; often it is the person who is the cause.

    For example Salah, it is an easy act of worship, as Allah, subhanahu wata'aala, has made clear:

    "And seek help in patience and prayer and truly it is (prayer) extremely heavy and hard except for Al-Khashi'un (i.e. true submitting)" [2;45].

    Prayer is an easy act of worship except, of course, for those who do not truly submit to their Lord; they will find it toilsome.

    Why do they find it so? The answer is that it is not the prayer that is difficult, but it is the hearts of these people which have changed from good to bad, as Allah, subhanahu wata'aala, mentioned:

    "Verily, the hypocrites seek to deceive Allah, but it is He Who deceives them. And when they stand up to pray, they stand with laziness …" [4;142]; in another verse He subhanahu wata'aala, said; "And that they came not to prayer except in a lazy state …" [9;54].

    2) Ignorance
    The rules of Islam did not come as mere do's and don'ts. Each obligation has wisdom and motivation behind it. It should make no difference to us if the wisdom for that particular practice is known or not, because if it is not known to us today, then if Allah wills, He will reveal it to future generations. What is primarily expected from us is to fully submit and implement every command.

    For example, the giving of charity, which apparently decreases the wealth of the giver. Islam did not say "Pay charity, pay charity", as this would not motivate people and therefore make it difficult to act upon. Instead Allah says;

    "Would you not like to give a loan to your Lord, and this loan will be paid back to you multiplied and you will be rewarded for it." [2:245]

    The Prophet, salla Allaahu 'alaihe wasallam, said; "Verily, wealth does not decrease because of charity." [Muslim]

    It seems Muslims often ask why this act or matter is Halaal or Haraam. With such an attitude they will never achieve their goal, because behind each injunction there is an aspect of wisdom. Without understanding this, practising Islam becomes a heavy burden. With strong belief, we do not even have to ask whether this or that is halaal or Haraam, but rather if it pleases Allah. Therefore we should take the rules seeking the pleasure of Allah subhanahu wata'aala,. If pleasing Allah subhanahu wata'aala, is, always, our aim, then undoubtedly the practice of religion becomes easy, no matter what apparent hardships we may encounter.

    3) Inappropriate environment
    It is true that sometimes we find it difficult to practise the religion, even those who are committed to it!

    The reason behind this is that we are practising our religion in an non-religious environment. Islam is not meant to be practised while being immersed in a Kufr (disbelieving) society. Its practice will indeed be difficult in such an environment. Therefore, the difficulty cannot be blamed upon Islam as a religion, but rather on the circumstances of the society.

    Returning to our example of prayer, we see that prayer by itself is easy, but if you have to stand alone to pray amongst non-Muslims, all of them watching you, it will suddenly become difficult. The obvious conclusion is that the prayer in itself is not difficult, but the environment has made it difficult.

    Another example is that of a woman who wears hijaab and is happy to cover herself. If this were an Islamic society, it would have been difficult for her not to be covered, or for a man not to respond to the call to prayer and pray in a mosque. Thus difficulty is not the nature of our religion, but we are trying to be pure in a decadent and immoral environment. These realities are not unknown to Islam, because the Prophet, salla Allaahu 'alaihe wasallam, already warned his companions some fourteen centuries ago, and by that has also warned us by saying, as reported by Abu Tha'laba, radiya Allahu 'anhu, "… Ahead of you are days which will require endurance (in the practice of religion), in which he who shows endurance will be like him who grasps live coals. The one who acts rightly during that period will have the reward of fifty men who act as he does."

    The hearers said, "The reward of fifty of them, Messenger of Allah!" He replied, "The reward of fifty of you." A companion said about this difference in reward, "Now you find people helping you to do good deeds, but then they will not find things to help them but they will find things to resist and oppose them." [Tirmidhi].

    So Islam is the religion of ease. If we accept it as a religion to start with, then we should take it with its concepts, and practise it in a pure environment (as opposed to a corrupted and decadent one); it will then become an easier religion to practise.

    As it is not possible to have a 100% pure society, we have to strive to achieve this by being surrounded by good Muslims. In doing this, the religion will loosen the burdens around it.

    The easiness of Islam has even been testified by the enemies of Islam. This was apparent in the statement of the Jews at the time of the Prophet, salla Allaahu 'alaihe wasallam, when a man and a woman from amongst them committed fornication. Some of them said to the others: "Let us go to this Prophet, for he has been sent with an easy law …". [Abu Dawood].

    So may Allah, subhanahu wata'aala, make us amongst those who

    "Listen to the word and follow the best thereof, whom Allah has guided and those are men of understanding." [39;18].

    Ameen.

    (Saaid.net)
    Let not your love be infatuation and let not your hatred be destruction.

  3. #3
    Odan
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    Re: new here-struggling sister

    I was just telling this to @KHAriya a few hours ago. So many reverts marry hastenly and they get put in a rough marriage situation.

    People really need to references before they marry somone. Tell your wali to talk to the people in the masjid where they pray and ask for his character and salah.

    It would seem reverts just skip this step.

    Op, my mum is a revert and she also went with ups and downs. I had to live with non-Muslim relatives as a child but Alhamdulilalh much better situation now.

    Take it from me, both my parents are reverts and they struggled in the early stages. I remeber my dad even started casually gambling, but now that's over.

    My advice get married again, but this time follow some sort of reference check....

    Can any mods be willing to be an intermediate between me and the op. I feel like her situation is very similar to my parents.
    95-93, You have no idea..read it.

  4. #4
    061116 Rifqah's Avatar
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    Re: new here-struggling sister

    Quote Originally Posted by Um_Saf View Post
    AsSalaamu Alaykum brothers and sisters.

    am new here. I am really struggling right now. I reverted in 2011 and at first I was practising as good as I could Alhamdulillah. now I am struggling with everything. I have been through a lot since then including an abusive marriage abroad as I reushed into getting married hoping my husband would help me increase my imaan and be around a muslim community. this didn't happen and currently have a 3yr old child living with my non muslim family starting a divorce process. I struggle reciting salah still and just generally my practicing is not great. I make dhikr constantly everyday. I just feel like because I cant recite the words of salah good I feel disconnected at the time you should be most connected to Allah (SAW) but I feel so connected making Dua in English. I have contacted the local mosque regarding my situation and the imam is helping me regarding divorce but because I live 2hrs away from the mosque I have limited support. there is no community were I live. my family don't accept my religious choice and are so happy that my marriage has ended in divorce 'so I can find a nice local guy' I have told them this will not be happening unless the 'guy' is also muslim.

    I am now 25yrs old and worry that I wont be able to remarry as a divorced single mother. I am so lonely I just want to move away but have no option to currently, I am embarrassed about my situation and worried about my child and I's future and deen.

    is anyone in a similar situation or is it just me?

    jazakAllah Khairan for reading this.
    wa Salaam
    Wa aleikum salam

    Welcome to the forum

    Do your best sister, continue to remember Allah (swt) and focus on making the five prayers a habit.

    Just do your best with the resources you have and trust in Allah (swt), who knows your situation.

    I'm a new convert too, last November 2016 and I live with non-Muslims, which is very hard. I struggle, I'm not going to make out that I don't but I trust Allah (swt) to order my steps and I will make dua for you that things will get easier.

    5 daily prayers - even if you have to drag yourself to do it.

    One small obedient step at a time.

    اَللّٰهُمَّ قِنِيْ شَرَّ نَفْسِيْ وَاعْزِمْ لِيْ عَليٰ أَرْ شَدِ أَمْرِيْ

    Allaahumma qinii sharra nafsii wa’-zim lii ‘alaa arshadi amrii. (‘Imran ibn Husayn. Musnad Ahmad #19141)

    O Allah, protect me from the evil of my self and give me the determination to do what is most right in my affairs.

    Aameen

  5. #5
    shrubs everywhere LailaTheMuslim's Avatar
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    Re: new here-struggling sister

    Sis as you feel really positive about doing dua, ask Allah to help you with your salaat/prayer. I'll also pray for you in sha Allah xx
    WhenTheWorldPushesYouToYourKnees-
    You'reInThePerfectPositionToPray (Islam.07)


    The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “O people, beware of this shirk, for it is more subtle than the footsteps of an ant. The one whom Allaah willed should speak said to him, “How can we beware of it when it is more subtle than the footsteps of an ant, O Messenger of Allaah?” He said, “Say, Allaahumma innaa na’oodhu bika min an nushrika bika shay’an na’lamuhu wa nastaghfiruka limaa laa na’lam (O Allaah, we seek refuge with You from knowingly associating anything with You, and we seek Your forgiveness for that which we do unknowingly).” (Narrated by Ahmad, 4/403)


    “My intercession will be for those among my ummah who have committed major sins.” [Classed as Sahih by al-Albaani in Sahih Abi Dawood, 3965]

    Please take a look at my blog : http://thinkingmuslima.blogspot.co.uk/

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    Re: new here-struggling sister

    jazakAllah Khairan for the Reponses it really means a lot.

    Insha'Allah I will be patient with salah and hope eventually it gets easier for me. The biggest issue I feel is lack of community as stated when you are around other practicing people it helps you to stay on the correct path. I will keep on trying to improve myself as always, contacting the imam was a huge positive step for me as I was in a really bad place when I first returned and too fearful of being judged.
    I hope I am making the correct moves to better our lifes Insha'Allah..

    brother- sorry to hear about your parents situation, it does sound similar to what I am going through. I am happy to hear more from you if there is a moderator willing to assist.you may be right that people rush into marriage but at the time it seemed the correct thing to do to no one imagines they will divorce once married unfortunately. the DV only truly started after our child was born I think. inshaAllah I hope that Allah allows me the opportunity to marry agan at some point.

    thanks again
    Wa Salaam

  7. #7
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    Re: new here-struggling sister

    I didn't understand the divorce process & mosque!
    Did you marry someone abroad?

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    Re: new here-struggling sister

    Quote Originally Posted by Ayman2 View Post
    I didn't understand the divorce process & mosque!
    Did you marry someone abroad?
    yes sorry I wasn't clear, divorce process I mean the legal marriage side- the legal divorce process via court-I married in his home country and I lived there for over 3yrs until he agreed that I should move back. I spoke the imam locally to me and explained my situation in detail and he said he would contact husband and get back to me. i don't want to go into too much detail on a public forum regarding my marriage.

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    Re: new here-struggling sister

    Sure.
    The first step is to finish the divorce process.
    Don't worry about remarrying again, you are still young and you can find better locally.

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    Re: new here-struggling sister

    Jazakallah khairan again everyone I appreciate the advice. Am gonna focus on myself and my child first. I know I keep talking about getting remarried and its true that its on my mind alot. But life goes on and my child is my priority for them I need to be a good model as I am currently the only Islamic guide-which is worrying me the most as I am struggling to pronounce the salah still. Alhamdulillah I teach what I know which is all I can do. They see me praying but the prounoucation is the struggle. I know I have the belief am just not the best teacher-it hasn't came easily to me which when I first reverted I assumed saying it 5times a day everyday I would be an expert in no time. But I had prayed and assumed after marriage I would be part of a duo in raising children. But we never know what our futures hold. I pray others dont find themselves in my situation inshaAllah.
    I am thinking of sending my child to an Islamic play group for 3hrs a week even though its far away and quite expensive for me currently- they will be around other children and women and they play with an Islamic focus. I do try my best Alhamdulillah. I guess am just worried for our future. There is no guarantee even with remarriage that the man would be able or willing to help raise my child-I know more than my Childs father which I was surprised to learn. I can only pray that Allah allows me to do the best for myself and my child inshaAllah.

    I've really appreciated your replies.

  11. #11
    Odan
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    Re: new here-struggling sister

    Quote Originally Posted by Um_Saf View Post
    Jazakallah khairan again everyone I appreciate the advice. Am gonna focus on myself and my child first. I know I keep talking about getting remarried and its true that its on my mind alot. But life goes on and my child is my priority for them I need to be a good model as I am currently the only Islamic guide-which is worrying me the most as I am struggling to pronounce the salah still. Alhamdulillah I teach what I know which is all I can do. They see me praying but the prounoucation is the struggle. I know I have the belief am just not the best teacher-it hasn't came easily to me which when I first reverted I assumed saying it 5times a day everyday I would be an expert in no time. But I had prayed and assumed after marriage I would be part of a duo in raising children. But we never know what our futures hold. I pray others dont find themselves in my situation inshaAllah.
    I am thinking of sending my child to an Islamic play group for 3hrs a week even though its far away and quite expensive for me currently- they will be around other children and women and they play with an Islamic focus. I do try my best Alhamdulillah. I guess am just worried for our future. There is no guarantee even with remarriage that the man would be able or willing to help raise my child-I know more than my Childs father which I was surprised to learn. I can only pray that Allah allows me to do the best for myself and my child inshaAllah.

    I've really appreciated your replies.
    I too think about marriage a lot. It's always on mind but like you said life goes on.

    Getting your kid to study in school is a great way to slowly be inovled in the community. Fantastic idea.

    Why would you marry someone who won't help you with the child?

    Inshalla Allah makes it easy for you.
    95-93, You have no idea..read it.

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    Re: new here-struggling sister

    Thanks for your comment, I am hoping to make positive steps inshaAllah.

    Oh by that comment I meant from my past experience you never truly know a person completely until your living with them so there is no 100% guarantee in anything. The only sure thing in this life is death. So for example if I rush to marry thinking it will be good for my child it might end up that it isn't if that makes sense?

    Plus I dont want a repeat performance for myself either.

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    Re: new here-struggling sister

    In which country have you lived? how easy was it to get used to local customs and traditions?

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    Re: new here-struggling sister

    I lived in India. And tbh it was difficult because the customs and tradition are mainly based on Hinduism (given its the main religion there) so I didnt join in with the vast majority of stuff unless there was Islamic evidence that it was permitted. And yet all the older mainly men not that gender is relevant kept commenting about how well I practiced- which confused me! One because that would mean they are aware that these things aren't good islamically and two because in my opinion I dont practice well atm. I only realised my husband wanted to do all the traditions after our child was here.mainly to please his family who aren't exactly close. Before that we never done the traditional stuff. He actually told me I wanted "too much religion in marriage" whatever that?

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    Odan
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    Re: new here-struggling sister

    We go throught patches in left where we feel isolated and forsaken. Where we feel Dua isnt working.

    From my personal experience... when you lay yourself before Allah and put your trust in Him, you will see the wisdom in what you have been through. The lessons you learn and the recognition of Allah you gain in troubled times makes it well worth the struggle.

    Be strong and and try to turn to Allah as best you can.

    Talk to Allah in a manner that you would talk to a close friend. Allah knows your problems better than you do but still, talk to Allah about what you are goind through.

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    Re: new here-struggling sister

    jazakallah khairan for the reply. this is exactly how I feel- isolated.

    ive read a good sentence yesterday. "Sabr is not how long you can wait, but how you act while you wait".

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    Re: new here-struggling sister

    jazakallah khairan for the reply. this is exactly how I feel- isolated.

    ive read a good sentence yesterday. "Sabr is not how long you can wait, but how you act while you wait".

 

 

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