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  1. #1
    Odan
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    Teach your daughters ....

    To all the parents, please teach your daughters physical activities before they hit puberty. Spend extra time to teach them swimming and biking & sports even if they don't want to. Unlike boys they don't have long childhood & can not pick up these skills as grown women.

    I am saying this because I wish my parents went out of their way to force me to learn basic skills like swimming and biking. I was chubby kid who didn't like physical activity & they were desi parents that believed kids just learn. By the time I was interested in being like other kids, I already hit puberty & many things were off-limit to me. I couldn't take swimming class in middle or high school because its mix-gender. I didn't mind back then but when I can't go jet skiing & scared of taking more then 2 steps in water and can't bike around to see beautiful park....I wish my parents were tiger parents who forced me to learn things.

    So go ahead and be tiger parents who force her to learn as much as possible before she needs to cover up

  2. #2
    Abu Awesome ibzy's Avatar
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    Re: Teach your daughters ....

    You can still learn to swim. Get just get a really big bucket, fill it with lukewarm water, jump in, and start swimming.
    They say good things come to those who wait, so imma be at least an hour late

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    Artist aynina's Avatar
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    Re: Teach your daughters ....

    I do believe you would be able to find a swimming teacher now, andd u can definitely learn how to ride a bike
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    Odan Creamcake's Avatar
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    Re: Teach your daughters ....

    Good idea sis
    Especially swimming, riding a bike etc... fab exercise, comes in handy, lifeskills etc, and muchhhh easier to pick up as a kid and learn pre puberty
    Like there are NO womens only swimming classes in my city for me to learn... I did learn in primary school but it's been like 13 years lol I must have forgotten
    Tbh home domestics too... sewing, cooking, chores etc.. I was given stuff way too easy and didn't learn this stuff properly
    And with Him are the keys of the Ghayb (all that is hidden), none knows them but He. And He knows whatever there is in the land and in the sea; not a leaf falls, but He knows it. There is not a grain in the darkness of the earth nor anything fresh or dry, but is written in a Clear Record”
    [al-An’aam 6:59]

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    Odan
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    Re: Teach your daughters ....

    Quote Originally Posted by Creamcake View Post
    Good idea sis
    Especially swimming, riding a bike etc... fab exercise, comes in handy, lifeskills etc, and muchhhh easier to pick up as a kid and learn pre puberty
    Like there are NO womens only swimming classes in my city for me to learn... I did learn in primary school but it's been like 13 years lol I must have forgotten
    Tbh home domestics too... sewing, cooking, chores etc.. I was given stuff way too easy and didn't learn this stuff properly
    Yea finding women only swimming pool is so difficult. They finally started a session in my city after several request but its 3pm on Monday, I am at work but majority of women looking for women only swimming session are stay home. Yes riding bike can be learned later in life but there is so much restriction for muslima especially if you live in highly Muslim populated city in west. Too many people will stop and watch. I am always looking for empty area to run (with baggy sports wear) then I worry about the danger of being in empty route. Life just gets tricky as we grow up.

    I feel like there was lot of emphasis on domestic skill for me as pre-teen, teenager. I agree those are important and many other life skill but they don't have deadline. A teenager can learn those or if a girl wakes up one day and says I want to learn xyz, she can. But if she says I want to learn to play tennis, it won't be so easy. She will have to find woman only group that doesn't play among man, find outfits that are conservative, which are not readily available in store. I think physical skills are more important than domestic skills for young girls. Youtube can teach many of the domestic skills, maybe except sewing that was tough & I am glad I learned when I was young

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    Odan Creamcake's Avatar
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    Re: Teach your daughters ....

    Quote Originally Posted by Kya View Post
    Yea finding women only swimming pool is so difficult. They finally started a session in my city after several request but its 3pm on Monday, I am at work but majority of women looking for women only swimming session are stay home. Yes riding bike can be learned later in life but there is so much restriction for muslima especially if you live in highly Muslim populated city in west. Too many people will stop and watch. I am always looking for empty area to run (with baggy sports wear) then I worry about the danger of being in empty route. Life just gets tricky as we grow up.

    I feel like there was lot of emphasis on domestic skill for me as pre-teen, teenager. I agree those are important and many other life skill but they don't have deadline. A teenager can learn those or if a girl wakes up one day and says I want to learn xyz, she can. But if she says I want to learn to play tennis, it won't be so easy. She will have to find woman only group that doesn't play among man, find outfits that are conservative, which are not readily available in store. I think physical skills are more important than domestic skills for young girls. Youtube can teach many of the domestic skills, maybe except sewing that was tough & I am glad I learned when I was young
    yeah I understand what you mean sis, it becomes tough as we grow older.
    And with Him are the keys of the Ghayb (all that is hidden), none knows them but He. And He knows whatever there is in the land and in the sea; not a leaf falls, but He knows it. There is not a grain in the darkness of the earth nor anything fresh or dry, but is written in a Clear Record”
    [al-An’aam 6:59]

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    Senior Member neelu's Avatar
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    Re: Teach your daughters ....

    I think one of the reasons parents are reluctant to teach girls these things is because they worry that if the girl loves those things and takes a very passionate interest in those activities, then it'll be that much harder to say when they turn 12ish that they can't do those things anymore. I'm not saying they shouldn't be taught those things as they help children to learn to be active from a young age, it's healthy and knowing how to swim could even save lives, but it has to be done in a careful way to ensure it doesn't become too difficult to steer girls away from such things as they get older.

    I also think (and some may find this controversial) that younger girls (under 10s) should get some vitamin D through sun exposure before the age where they have to cover up. I mean little things like wearing short sleeves when they go out in Spring, wearing 3/4 length skirts or dresses. I read somewhere that such a young age is the optimum time for absorption of vitamin D anyway. Of course this has to be done carefully as well because too much exposure can cause sunburn or other skin damage, but a healthy manageable amount of exposure is good and helps prevent diseases as well. I personally am quite distrustful of sunblock. My Dr says they can block beneficial UV, not just harmful UV, but at the same time I'm not oblivious to the dangers of excessive sun exposure either so it's a balancing act but I am convinced that exposure at a young age (that the child can tolerate and doesn't cause heat rash or sunburn) is healthy.

    The length of time depends on the child as some kids can play outside for hours with no problems and some get sunburn within ten minutes. Avoid high noon strong summer sun as that's often more damaging, but morning sun in summer or afternoon sun in spring tends to be more manageable. You'll know your own child and how much time is appropriate for her (boys don't have to worry as much as they can easily get sun exposure when they're older anyway)./

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    Umm Kulthum Rumaysah~'s Avatar
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    Re: Teach your daughters ....

    I agree, alhamdulillah my parents put me into all sorts of activities as a child. At least now I can say i've done those things once but can't do them now because of restrictions.
    But the kids generation today just don't want to do these things, they would rather watch tv or play on phones, boys and girls.
    "Increase the amount of quran you recite and do not abandon it, for the assistance you'll receive with regards to the matter you strive towards depends on how much you recite"

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    Re: Teach your daughters ....

    Thing is swimming is just one thing, there are plenty of exercises and solutions you can get and workout with at home. And I mean really tough workouts, but that is if space at home is available.
    والمبادرة إلى التكفير إنما تغلب على طباع من يغلب عليهم الجهل - ابن تيمية رحمه الله - بغية المرتاد

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    Odan snow_flakes's Avatar
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    Re: Teach your daughters ....

    Quote Originally Posted by ibzy View Post
    You can still learn to swim. Get just get a really big bucket, fill it with lukewarm water, jump in, and start swimming.
    lol
    ".......He giveth and spendeth (of His bounty) as He pleaseth. But the revelation that cometh to thee from Allah increaseth in most of them (kuffar) their obstinate rebellion and blasphemy.Amongst them we have placed enmity and hatred till the Day of Judgment. Every time they kindle the fire of war, Allah doth extinguish it;but they (ever) strive to do mischief on earth. And Allah loveth not those who do mischief."(5:64)

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    Gender: Male oshirowanen's Avatar
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    Re: Teach your daughters ....

    I send my little daughter to martial arts classes.


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    Senior Member babadods's Avatar
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    Re: Teach your daughters ....

    Quote Originally Posted by Kya View Post
    To all the parents, please teach your daughters physical activities before they hit puberty. Spend extra time to teach them swimming and biking & sports even if they don't want to. Unlike boys they don't have long childhood & can not pick up these skills as grown women.

    I am saying this because I wish my parents went out of their way to force me to learn basic skills like swimming and biking. I was chubby kid who didn't like physical activity & they were desi parents that believed kids just learn. By the time I was interested in being like other kids, I already hit puberty & many things were off-limit to me. I couldn't take swimming class in middle or high school because its mix-gender. I didn't mind back then but when I can't go jet skiing & scared of taking more then 2 steps in water and can't bike around to see beautiful park....I wish my parents were tiger parents who forced me to learn things.

    So go ahead and be tiger parents who force her to learn as much as possible before she needs to cover up
    i see where you are coming from and i agree to an extent however if it is to lose weight then there isn't any point in doing all the things at a young age as she will only grow love for these things and then eventually might actually argue with parents on why she cant do these things since likes them soo much. i am not a parent not am i married yet but if i do marry and have kids id raise them how i guess my mother raised my sister, all at home and was taught quran at age 5 etc taught her how to be a good house woman and would always keep her busy in chores etc
    biking etc is all good stuff but you can do that anyway if you have a big enough house or if there are women only parks in your area.
    other forms of entertainment i suggest would be reading books
    going to women boxing or other forms of martial arts classes (escorted with a mahrem)

    there's just soo many other things that can be done even at a later age if not then just pick up something else as long as it doesn't jeopardize your hijab and identity.

    fyi home workouts are another alternative

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    Odan
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    Re: Teach your daughters ....

    Quote Originally Posted by علي View Post
    Thing is swimming is just one thing, there are plenty of exercises and solutions you can get and workout with at home. And I mean really tough workouts, but that is if space at home is available.
    It is not really about working out or losing weight. As others have pointed out, there are options. Its about learning basic skills that's expected & enjoying life with those skills. Such as cruise around the park on a bike to cover more distance vs. walking. Running I feel is not always appropriate for women. But also having the mindset of being physically active.

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    Odan
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    Re: Teach your daughters ....

    Quote Originally Posted by neelu View Post
    I think one of the reasons parents are reluctant to teach girls these things is because they worry that if the girl loves those things and takes a very passionate interest in those activities, then it'll be that much harder to say when they turn 12ish that they can't do those things anymore. I'm not saying they shouldn't be taught those things as they help children to learn to be active from a young age, it's healthy and knowing how to swim could even save lives, but it has to be done in a careful way to ensure it doesn't become too difficult to steer girls away from such things as they get older.

    /
    That is a good point, I didn't think about it. But it reminded me of something my mom always said when we were young or when I tried getting my younger siblings more active. she would say "don't make kids too smart (independent/street smart/active), they get out of control later". She used this philosophy for sons and daughters & that is probably why we weren't involved in much growing up. School & Masjid were the only things we had to do. Rest was upto us whether we wanted to play with other kids or sit home and watch tv all day.

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    shrubs everywhere LailaTheMuslim's Avatar
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    Re: Teach your daughters ....

    Yeah I can't ride a bike. My fault though. Cos I didn't get to grips of it though my family always have and still offer to teach me it. I can swim and have a Muslim swimsuit, but I'm not very comfortable in mixed pools.

    There is only an hour per week offered for women's martial arts at my local sports centre, too.

    I think there are hijab friendly motorbikes out there. In Morocco women with hijab drove vespa bikes, but the design of their bikes covered their modesty.

    x
    Last edited by LailaTheMuslim; 21-04-17 at 02:08 PM.
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    Senior Member neelu's Avatar
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    Re: Teach your daughters ....

    I was taught these things as a kid btw. I was taken to the swimming baths every once in a while by my older siblings and went to an all girls secondary school where we had a pool so I was able to learn there. My family taught me to ride a bike when I was around 7 as well and my brother has taught his daughters to swim and ride bikes.

    Having said that, by my late teens I wanted to start riding a motorbike and my family were really against it. My brother kept saying it wasn't safe. I couldn't afford one anyway so that never happened and by the time I was older, I'd lost interest. Now with hindsight I think it's probably true that it isn't that safe so it's just as well. I don't like the fact that people disapprove so much of letting kids ride bikes on the pavement cos' I worry that it could be unsafe to let them ride on the road, especially as during my childhood, no one wore helmets and even now, there aren't that many cycle lanes.

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    Senior Member MuslimThinker's Avatar
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    Re: Teach your daughters ....

    I agree with OP on this one,
    once you are grown up, perhaps much more less comfortable to learn out in the public. maybe shy or embarassing ( due to not sure how to balance the bicycle etc) but still not impossible, just need time and proper place, and discipline. but still definitely much better to learn during the younger days.
    at least if they have this skill, they can go biking or swimming/sports together with their husband. helps the marriage.

    the new generation,sad to say yes they are full of electronics, need to balance up a bit between those and skills. starting to take over.
    the interest in cooking can start early too

 

 

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