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View Poll Results: First child: son or daughter?

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  • son

    35 68.63%
  • daughter

    16 31.37%
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  1. #1
    Victory is promised... Deeni Akh's Avatar
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    Icon11 Your first child: son or daughter and why?



    If Allah wills for you to get married and have children. would you make du'a for your first child to be a son or daughter? And give reasons.

    May Allah provide you all with righteous spouses and children that will be the coolness of your eyes.

  2. #41
    Victory is promised... Deeni Akh's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Ameen to the Du'as.

  3. #42
    Odan A.Basheer's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by Ms.Mints View Post
    Kullu bidda dalala wa kullu dalala fin naar...
    A bit off topic no?

  4. #43
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by RaNdOm View Post
    Lol but u don't know what would be best for u - I think you'd be a great dad to sons inshaAllah cos like then u can teach them to be good to their mother
    True. InshaAllah I hope so, nothing's certain. May Allah gives what is best for us and make us rolemodels for our children.

  5. #44
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    Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    A long time ago I always wanted a son first.

    But then I changed.

    I want a daughter first now, they're much cuter and sweeter especially when dressed like a true Muslimah. Seeing yur daughter in an abaya is just .

    And personally teaching her the deen and making her a strong Muslimah .

    I don't know, can't really put it into words, but they're just better.

    Plus I've already thought of a name for her so that's a plus!
    You think you know more than my scholar's qiyās? He was more learned than you and all other scholars combined. Yeah, the devil was the greatest scholar too and look where his qiyās of fire being better than tīn got him. Sorry.

    You follow your scholar's qiyās, and I will follow the Qur'ān and Sunnah.

  6. #45
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    Quote Originally Posted by A.Basheer View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Ms.Mints View Post
    Kullu bidda dalala wa kullu dalala fin naar...
    A bit off topic no?
    You think you know more than my scholar's qiyās? He was more learned than you and all other scholars combined. Yeah, the devil was the greatest scholar too and look where his qiyās of fire being better than tīn got him. Sorry.

    You follow your scholar's qiyās, and I will follow the Qur'ān and Sunnah.

  7. #46
    Kintsukuroi RaNdOm's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by Deeni Akh View Post
    True. InshaAllah I hope so, nothing's certain. May Allah gives what is best for us and make us rolemodels for our children.
    Ameen
    ...And he who fears Allah - He will make for him a way out. [65:3]
    "Put your trust in Allah, certainly, Allah loves those who put their trust (in Him)."
    [Al-Imran 3:159]

  8. #47
    Kintsukuroi RaNdOm's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by Linkdeutscher View Post
    A long time ago I always wanted a son first.

    But then I changed.

    I want a daughter first now, they're much cuter and sweeter especially when dressed like a true Muslimah. Seeing yur daughter in an abaya is just .

    And personally teaching her the deen and making her a strong Muslimah .

    I don't know, can't really put it into words, but they're just better.

    Plus I've already thought of a name for her so that's a plus!
    ...And he who fears Allah - He will make for him a way out. [65:3]
    "Put your trust in Allah, certainly, Allah loves those who put their trust (in Him)."
    [Al-Imran 3:159]

  9. #48
    Victory is promised... Deeni Akh's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by Linkdeutscher View Post
    A long time ago I always wanted a son first.

    But then I changed.

    I want a daughter first now, they're much cuter and sweeter especially when dressed like a true Muslimah. Seeing yur daughter in an abaya is just .

    And personally teaching her the deen and making her a strong Muslimah .

    I don't know, can't really put it into words, but they're just better.

    Plus I've already thought of a name for her so that's a plus!
    Link you softie

    I feel you though.

  10. #49
    Odan A.Basheer's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by RaNdOm View Post
    lollll

    Practically the only time I've seen him contribute to a topic and you make fun of him.

    I mean a topic other than religious debate.

  11. #50
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Can imagine @Linkdeutscher telling his 3 year old daughter not to follow the hanafi mathab and to be a part of ahlul hadeeth

  12. #51
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    Quote Originally Posted by RaNdOm View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Linkdeutscher View Post
    A long time ago I always wanted a son first.

    But then I changed.

    I want a daughter first now, they're much cuter and sweeter especially when dressed like a true Muslimah. Seeing yur daughter in an abaya is just .

    And personally teaching her the deen and making her a strong Muslimah .

    I don't know, can't really put it into words, but they're just better.

    Plus I've already thought of a name for her so that's a plus!
    What?

    I want a Wahhaban!
    You think you know more than my scholar's qiyās? He was more learned than you and all other scholars combined. Yeah, the devil was the greatest scholar too and look where his qiyās of fire being better than tīn got him. Sorry.

    You follow your scholar's qiyās, and I will follow the Qur'ān and Sunnah.

  13. #52
    Kintsukuroi RaNdOm's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by A.Basheer View Post
    lollll

    Practically the only time I've seen him contribute to a topic and you make fun of him.

    I mean a topic other than religious debate.
    Lol link wouldn't be able to handle it
    @Linkdeutscher u have NO IDEA how much headache we are, like it's all fun and games when we're young but once we're teenagers and people are mean and all those tears and all that drama - u need a patient man lol
    ...And he who fears Allah - He will make for him a way out. [65:3]
    "Put your trust in Allah, certainly, Allah loves those who put their trust (in Him)."
    [Al-Imran 3:159]

  14. #53
    Wanderer Stoic Believer's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by RaNdOm View Post
    Lol link wouldn't be able to handle it
    @Linkdeutscher u have NO IDEA how much headache we are, like it's all fun and games when we're young but once we're teenagers and people are mean and all those tears and all that drama - u need a patient man lol
    Yep they say boys are a headache when they're little but calm down as they move into their teens. And girls are the opposite.

  15. #54
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    Quote Originally Posted by Deeni Akh View Post
    Can imagine @Linkdeutscher telling his 3 year old daughter not to follow the hanafi mathab and to be a part of ahlul hadeeth
    You know I wrote 'make her a strong la mathhabi Muslimah' but I removed because it didn't suit the tone of the overall post.

    She will destroy the muqallideen in shaa' Allah!
    You think you know more than my scholar's qiyās? He was more learned than you and all other scholars combined. Yeah, the devil was the greatest scholar too and look where his qiyās of fire being better than tīn got him. Sorry.

    You follow your scholar's qiyās, and I will follow the Qur'ān and Sunnah.

  16. #55
    Odan A.Basheer's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Yea come to think of it, I don't know why all these brothers want a daughter living in the West.

    I believe they are easier to raise than boys in a more Islamic society, but girls are extremely difficult in the West.

  17. #56
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by Linkdeutscher View Post
    A long time ago I always wanted a son first.

    But then I changed.

    I want a daughter first now, they're much cuter and sweeter especially when dressed like a true Muslimah. Seeing yur daughter in an abaya is just .

    And personally teaching her the deen and making her a strong Muslimah .

    I don't know, can't really put it into words, but they're just better.

    Plus I've already thought of a name for her so that's a plus!
    Me too, the ummah needs more pious Muslimahs.

  18. #57
    Senior Member neelu's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Healthy and pious inshaAllah- especially scared of the risks of passing my illness on to a child so it's a very big deal in fact I don't want to risk getting pregnant until and unless my health is good enough to handle the responsibility... I mean emotionally I've always wanted children but physically the way things are, it's not a good idea even though it's what I wanted. Not that bothered about having a boy or girl first as it's a matter outside my control anyway so I don't wanna say I want such n such and then feel disappointed if Allah (swt) gave the opposite. Having said that, if I were able to choose, I think I'd want twins because I'm already single in my late thirties, if/when I do marry I don't know if I'll even have more than one successful pregnancy so yeah if I had two kids in one go it would be intense but one less thing to worry about and of course if they're twins I'd like a boy and girl so I don't miss out on either gender.

    If it's a single pregnancy then I'd want my first born to be a girl because I think older boys can tend to be bossy and over protective of younger sisters whereas a younger brother will still be protective but not go overboard in wielding authority over her cos' she's still his elder. So in the past I've often thought I'd want my first child to be a girl and for her to have a younger brother and even a younger sister as well cos' I'd have a preference for a more female dominated household (but with a bit of male presence)- maybe cos' of my own family as I also grew up with one older brother and one older sister (though in my case the brother is the eldest).... and as you know there's more blessing in raising girls as well. Also I think young boys tend to be more hyper and messy and tiring.

  19. #58
    Kintsukuroi RaNdOm's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by Stoic Believer View Post
    Yep they say boys are a headache when they're little but calm down as they move into their teens. And girls are the opposite.
    No boys are a headache too loool they have anger issues - basically teenagerism is hard
    ...And he who fears Allah - He will make for him a way out. [65:3]
    "Put your trust in Allah, certainly, Allah loves those who put their trust (in Him)."
    [Al-Imran 3:159]

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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by A.Basheer View Post
    Yea come to think of it, I don't know why all these brothers want a daughter living in the West.

    I believe they are easier to raise than boys in a more Islamic society, but girls are extremely difficult in the West.
    Why do you say that?

  21. #60
    فاين تذهبون Peony.'s Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by Linkdeutscher View Post
    A long time ago I always wanted a son first.

    But then I changed.

    I want a daughter first now, they're much cuter and sweeter especially when dressed like a true Muslimah. Seeing yur daughter in an abaya is just .

    And personally teaching her the deen and making her a strong Muslimah .

    I don't know, can't really put it into words, but they're just better.

    Plus I've already thought of a name for her so that's a plus!
    Never expected to see this side of yours.
    All humans are dead, except those who have knowledge.
    And all those who have knowledge are asleep, except those who do good deeds.
    And those who do good deeds are deceived, except those who are sincere.
    And those who are sincere are always in a state of worry.”

    Imam Shafi'i (رحمه الله)

  22. #61
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by neelu View Post
    Healthy and pious inshaAllah- especially scared of the risks of passing my illness on to a child so it's a very big deal in fact I don't want to risk getting pregnant until and unless my health is good enough to handle the responsibility... I mean emotionally I've always wanted children but physically the way things are, it's not a good idea even though it's what I wanted. Not that bothered about having a boy or girl first as it's a matter outside my control anyway so I don't wanna say I want such n such and then feel disappointed if Allah (swt) gave the opposite. Having said that, if I were able to choose, I think I'd want twins because I'm already single in my late thirties, if/when I do marry I don't know if I'll even have more than one successful pregnancy so yeah if I had two kids in one go it would be intense but one less thing to worry about and of course if they're twins I'd like a boy and girl so I don't miss out on either gender.

    If it's a single pregnancy then I'd want my first born to be a girl because I think older boys can tend to be bossy and over protective of younger sisters whereas a younger brother will still be protective but not go overboard in wielding authority over her cos' she's still his elder. So in the past I've often thought I'd want my first child to be a girl and for her to have a younger brother and even a younger sister as well cos' I'd have a preference for a more female dominated household (but with a bit of male presence)- maybe cos' of my own family as I also grew up with one older brother and one older sister (though in my case the brother is the eldest).... and as you know there's more blessing in raising girls as well. Also I think young boys tend to be more hyper and messy and tiring.
    True boys are a bit more of a headache than girls to raise. May Allah grant you what you wish for.

  23. #62
    Kintsukuroi RaNdOm's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by A.Basheer View Post
    Yea come to think of it, I don't know why all these brothers want a daughter living in the West.

    I believe they are easier to raise than boys in a more Islamic society, but girls are extremely difficult in the West.
    Are u kiddin me? Girls are easier cos they LISTEN but boys have their own opinions - like that's why girls do so well in school etc and boys u have to nag and nag. Plus girls are naturally more shy etc but boys -
    ...And he who fears Allah - He will make for him a way out. [65:3]
    "Put your trust in Allah, certainly, Allah loves those who put their trust (in Him)."
    [Al-Imran 3:159]

  24. #63
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    Quote Originally Posted by RaNdOm View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by A.Basheer View Post
    lollll

    Practically the only time I've seen him contribute to a topic and you make fun of him.

    I mean a topic other than religious debate.
    Lol link wouldn't be able to handle it
    @Linkdeutscher u have NO IDEA how much headache we are, like it's all fun and games when we're young but once we're teenagers and people are mean and all those tears and all that drama - u need a patient man lol
    You just convinced me of wanting daughters even more, that's so cute.

    How do you know that I can't handle it or how patient I am?
    You think you know more than my scholar's qiyās? He was more learned than you and all other scholars combined. Yeah, the devil was the greatest scholar too and look where his qiyās of fire being better than tīn got him. Sorry.

    You follow your scholar's qiyās, and I will follow the Qur'ān and Sunnah.

  25. #64
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    Quote Originally Posted by RaNdOm View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by A.Basheer View Post
    Yea come to think of it, I don't know why all these brothers want a daughter living in the West.

    I believe they are easier to raise than boys in a more Islamic society, but girls are extremely difficult in the West.
    like that's why girls do so well in school
    Nonsense. The modern kafir education system is more female-centric, that's why 'girls' do better.
    You think you know more than my scholar's qiyās? He was more learned than you and all other scholars combined. Yeah, the devil was the greatest scholar too and look where his qiyās of fire being better than tīn got him. Sorry.

    You follow your scholar's qiyās, and I will follow the Qur'ān and Sunnah.

  26. #65
    Kintsukuroi RaNdOm's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by Linkdeutscher View Post
    You just convinced me of wanting daughters even more, that's so cute.

    How do you know that I can't handle it or how patient I am?
    hmmmm

    ok ok ok go have your daughters inshaAllah, I'm kidding you'd be a good dad to them inshaAllah - u know the type that your future son in laws will be like lol
    ...And he who fears Allah - He will make for him a way out. [65:3]
    "Put your trust in Allah, certainly, Allah loves those who put their trust (in Him)."
    [Al-Imran 3:159]

  27. #66
    فاين تذهبون Peony.'s Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by A.Basheer View Post
    Yea come to think of it, I don't know why all these brothers want a daughter living in the West.

    I believe they are easier to raise than boys in a more Islamic society, but girls are extremely difficult in the West.
    Well, tbh both have their pros and cons but personally i believe girls are generally easier. We listen and obey when we are told to do something, unlike boys who tend to rebel (im speaking generally) and since most muslimahs stay at home (well i guess that depends on the parents), she is bond to be safe from societies immoral and immodest behaviour, in shaa Allah.

    Boys are the opposite, especially during their teenage years. They go out a lot, spend time with their mates, etc, so they can easily full into sin. Allahu Alam.
    Last edited by Peony.; 14-02-16 at 11:01 PM.
    All humans are dead, except those who have knowledge.
    And all those who have knowledge are asleep, except those who do good deeds.
    And those who do good deeds are deceived, except those who are sincere.
    And those who are sincere are always in a state of worry.”

    Imam Shafi'i (رحمه الله)

  28. #67
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by vildan View Post
    Never expected to see this side of yours.
    I think he got hacked lol

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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by Stoic Believer View Post
    Why do you say that?
    Well, she goes through more difficulties and pressure growing up in a Western society than men (hijaab, etc). School is more difficult for her. Controlling her is more difficult. Then later, the whole university stage and trying to marry her off. It takes a lot to protect her and give her an Islamic upbringing.

    As for me, if I happen to live in the US with daughters, I would home school them and then that's it. But how many Muslim parents would do that? They throw their daughters into the mix and expect them to fit into society.

  30. #69
    Kintsukuroi RaNdOm's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by Linkdeutscher View Post
    Nonsense. The modern kafir education system is more female-centric, that's why 'girls' do better.
    Why and how?

    and no trust me - even in our house the girls are the ones that you can easily convince and the boys are STUBBORNNNNNNNN and cos u can't make them cry it's like u can't make them do anything lol
    ...And he who fears Allah - He will make for him a way out. [65:3]
    "Put your trust in Allah, certainly, Allah loves those who put their trust (in Him)."
    [Al-Imran 3:159]

  31. #70
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    I find boys a bit sometimes, but then I really like the name Musa.

    I guess it's better for girls to have older brothers if they're responsible. If you raise a good son and then have daughters, it would be good for them.

  32. #71
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    Quote Originally Posted by vildan View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Linkdeutscher View Post
    A long time ago I always wanted a son first.

    But then I changed.

    I want a daughter first now, they're much cuter and sweeter especially when dressed like a true Muslimah. Seeing yur daughter in an abaya is just .

    And personally teaching her the deen and making her a strong Muslimah .

    I don't know, can't really put it into words, but they're just better.

    Plus I've already thought of a name for her so that's a plus!
    Never expected to see this side of yours.
    Some kid hacked my account. No really, not lying at all.
    You think you know more than my scholar's qiyās? He was more learned than you and all other scholars combined. Yeah, the devil was the greatest scholar too and look where his qiyās of fire being better than tīn got him. Sorry.

    You follow your scholar's qiyās, and I will follow the Qur'ān and Sunnah.

  33. #72
    Victory is promised... Deeni Akh's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    I want to be that father who can make his daughters open up to him at whatever age they're in, could be teens to adulthood to middle aged years lol. I am not bothered by the drama, tears and emotions at all, in fact it would help to soften my heart up and understand them more.

  34. #73
    Odan A.Basheer's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by RaNdOm View Post
    Are u kiddin me? Girls are easier cos they LISTEN but boys have their own opinions - like that's why girls do so well in school etc and boys u have to nag and nag. Plus girls are naturally more shy etc but boys -
    Yea but I'm talking about in the UK/US... outside the home. I bet inside the home they are easier and more pleasant than boys... sure.

  35. #74
    --- Simply_Logical's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    no option for alien? lol
    Surah Taha, Verse 69:

    وَأَلْقِ مَا فِي يَمِينِكَ تَلْقَفْ مَا صَنَعُوا إِنَّمَا صَنَعُوا كَيْدُ سَاحِرٍ وَلَا يُفْلِحُ السَّاحِرُ حَيْثُ أَتَىٰ

    "And throw that which is in your right hand! It will swallow up that which they have made. That which they have made is only a magician's trick,
    and the magician will never be successful, no matter whatever amount (of skill) he may attain."

    Self Help Ruqya Shari'ah Guide
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    Is there such a thing as good magic? by Abu Ibraheem
    http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthrea...y-Abu-Ibraheem

    Don't fear the Jinn - Muhammad Tim Humble
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    Exposing Black Magic
    http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthrea...ing+black+mgic

    The History of Black Magic
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    Real Magicians And Sorcerers
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    How to destroy a taweez ? Ruqya related questions answered
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    http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthrea...xposing-Taweez

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    Sorcerer's Plot | Arabic | English Subtitles | Every Muslim must watch this video
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  36. #75
    Senior Member neelu's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    I'd imagine sons would be more fun but also more headache lol. For me a lot would depend on the type of husband I end up with as he'd be the main role model for a son. I have mixed feelings about my brother though cos' he's amazing with kids but totally irreligious so I think on the one hand he'd be a good role model who'd encourage kids to get educated, study well, takes them to museums, to parks to learn to ride bikes, tries to instill confidence in them if they're shy, when he had his own kids, he changed their nappies, even gave their mum the weekend off one time to go on a spa retreat when their toddlers were a year old (yes I know, the women in my family are spoilt- including myself lol)... I don't know many Pakistani men who do that, especially an only son. So good role model on that front but then I think if he becomes an influential figure, what if he encourages irreligiousness as well? That aspect of his behaviour is already a source of friction between me and him as it is.

    I guess a lot depends on who I marry, if I marry.

  37. #76
    Kintsukuroi RaNdOm's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by A.Basheer View Post
    Yea but I'm talking about in the UK/US... outside the home. I bet inside the home they are easier and more pleasant than boys... sure.
    ok then I see your point cos it is kinda scary like what kids are like today and wantin to copy the kardashians and stuff - I feel worried now :/
    ...And he who fears Allah - He will make for him a way out. [65:3]
    "Put your trust in Allah, certainly, Allah loves those who put their trust (in Him)."
    [Al-Imran 3:159]

  38. #77
    فاين تذهبون Peony.'s Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by Deeni Akh View Post
    I want to be that father who can make his daughters open up to him at whatever age they're in, could be teens to adulthood to middle aged years lol. I am not bothered by the drama, tears and emotions at all, in fact it would help to soften my heart up and understand them more.
    Well you have to be a father who constantly plays and shows affection in order for your daughters to open up to you.

    Its not really the norm for girls to open up to their fathers, but if you manage to form a solid relationship with your children (daughters in precise) then no doubt you will succeed, in shaa Allah.

    I love my father (too much its not natural) and theres many reasons to this. I won't go into detail but all you need to do is - follow the Prophet Muhammad (sallalllahu alayhi wa sallam), in shaa Allah and you will attain your goal, bi'ithnillah.
    All humans are dead, except those who have knowledge.
    And all those who have knowledge are asleep, except those who do good deeds.
    And those who do good deeds are deceived, except those who are sincere.
    And those who are sincere are always in a state of worry.”

    Imam Shafi'i (رحمه الله)

  39. #78
    --- Simply_Logical's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by RaNdOm View Post
    ok then I see your point cos it is kinda scary like what kids are like today and wantin to copy the kardashians and stuff - I feel worried now :/
    lool
    Surah Taha, Verse 69:

    وَأَلْقِ مَا فِي يَمِينِكَ تَلْقَفْ مَا صَنَعُوا إِنَّمَا صَنَعُوا كَيْدُ سَاحِرٍ وَلَا يُفْلِحُ السَّاحِرُ حَيْثُ أَتَىٰ

    "And throw that which is in your right hand! It will swallow up that which they have made. That which they have made is only a magician's trick,
    and the magician will never be successful, no matter whatever amount (of skill) he may attain."

    Self Help Ruqya Shari'ah Guide
    http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthrea...Shari-ah-Guide

    Practical Self Ruqya
    http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthrea...=1#post7492713

    Is there such a thing as good magic? by Abu Ibraheem
    http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthrea...y-Abu-Ibraheem

    Don't fear the Jinn - Muhammad Tim Humble
    http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthrea...mad-Tim-Humble

    Exposing Black Magic
    http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthrea...ing+black+mgic

    The History of Black Magic
    http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthrea...hlight=history

    Real Magicians And Sorcerers
    http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthrea...-And-Sorcerers

    How to destroy a taweez ? Ruqya related questions answered
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    Exposing Taweez...
    http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthrea...xposing-Taweez

    Ruqyah Audio
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    Sorcerer's Plot | Arabic | English Subtitles | Every Muslim must watch this video
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  40. #79
    Wanderer Stoic Believer's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by A.Basheer View Post
    Well, she goes through more difficulties and pressure growing up in a Western society than men (hijaab, etc). School is more difficult for her. Controlling her is more difficult. Then later, the whole university stage and trying to marry her off. It takes a lot to protect her and give her an Islamic upbringing.

    As for me, if I happen to live in the US with daughters, I would home school them and then that's it. But how many Muslim parents would do that? They throw their daughters into the mix and expect them to fit into society.
    Yeah I get you. It's tough.

    I think it helps a lot, though, to live in a city with a Muslim community that is big on the deen. That way she will be interacting with a lot of Muslimahs who observe proper hijab, practice the religion, etc in shaa Allah. I don't think they're that common in the US, though.

  41. #80
    Victory is promised... Deeni Akh's Avatar
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    Re: Your first child: son or daughter and why?

    Quote Originally Posted by vildan View Post
    Well you have to be a father who constantly plays and shows affection in order for your daughters to open up to you.

    Its not really the norm for girls to open up to their fathers, but if you manage to form a solid relationship with your children (daughters in precise) then no doubt you will succeed, in shaa Allah.

    I love my father (too much its not natural) and theres many reasons to this. I won't go into detail but all you need to do is - follow the Prophet Muhammad (sallalllahu alayhi wa sallam), in shaa Allah and you will attain your goal, bi'ithnillah.
    I see. MashaAllah Alayki, inshaAllah, jzk.

 

 

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