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View Poll Results: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

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  • Yes

    91 88.35%
  • No

    12 11.65%
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  1. #1
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    Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    I know many of you are not parents and do not have adult children, but inshaAllah if you live long enough to do so, would you allow them to marry outside of your ethnicity?

    Also, what kind of conditions would you require someone to have in order for your son/daughter to be allowed to marry them? E.g. do they need to be earning x amount of money etc.?

    Last edited by DaughterOfAdam; 06-08-14 at 02:55 PM.

  2. #161
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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Quote Originally Posted by slaveuk View Post
    You get emotional and ignore the points I made.

    Perhaps you are talking about those Muslims who don't practice their religion at all. Go to nightclubs and don't pray?

    I'm talking about practicing Muslims. Ancestors rolling in their graves for what? Not dressing in Shalwar Kameez but choosing to dress in something western? Not speaking the language but speaking in English? Not bringing Indian sweets to gatherings but bringing a cake or doughnuts? What is your point?

    I'm not sure why you are bringing phrases like "you have the cheek". Did I insult you? Did I rubbish your opinion? We are having a civilised discussion here.

    You want to talk about pillaging of resources and taking an entire nation as slaves and showing animosity to the religion? Look no further than the governments of Muslim countries that won't even allow Muslims to practice their faith.

    You want to hold an entire nation of people responsible for the shameful history of their nation? I can assure you that you are more likely to find a non-Muslim in the UK who will objectively criticise his or her own ancestors for being slave owners rather than a Pakistani who probably smile when he tells you that he has relatives that are criminals.

    Stop the emotion. We are talking about marriage between different ethnicities. If you want to disagree, fine. Don't get personal.
    The discussion and my input is nothing about marriage between different ethnicity's although the topic itself was.

    The discussion I was having is about calling yourself British, taking the British identity, culture and disassociating yourself with your home country(and all that follows), permanently establishing yourself with non Muslims and that the culture of Muslim countries have been influenced massively by Islam for centuries.

    You brought up the government of Muslim countries, who since the fall of the Ottoman's have been in the control and shared between Western nations. Ergo, anything they do is in the interest of the West. Even then, I don't see why you insult them and not those who are indeed far worse in the West. Why the double standards?

    You were the one suggesting that Muslims in the UK such as myself are facing an "identity crisis" which makes no sense at all and is in fact ironic since we want to cling onto our culture/identity/heritage and not a foreign one and follow those who we should have nothing in common with. I wasn't the one that brought it up either, you did when you insinuated that. So how can I be the one being personal?
    Last edited by peras1; 08-08-16 at 04:41 PM.

  3. #162
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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Quote Originally Posted by peras1 View Post
    The discussion and my input is nothing about marriage between different ethnicity's although the topic itself was.

    The discussion I was having is about calling yourself British, taking the British identity, culture and disassociating yourself with your home country(and all that follows), permanently establishing yourself with non Muslims and that the culture of Muslim countries have been influenced massively by Islam for centuries.

    You brought up the government of Muslim countries, who since the fall of the Ottoman's have been in the control and shared between Western nations. Ergo, anything they do is in the interest of the West. Even then, I don't see why you insult them and not those who are indeed far worse in the West. Why the double standards?

    You were the one suggesting that Muslims in the UK such as myself are facing an "identity crisis" which makes no sense at all and is in fact ironic since we want to cling onto our culture/identity/heritage and not a foreign one and follow those who we should have nothing in common with. I wasn't the one that brought it up either, you did when you insinuated that. So how can I be the one being personal?
    What do you mean by follow?

    Do you mean in terms of religion and committing haram? What is your point?

    Also you need to differentiate between governments and the average citizen. To lump them all as one as though they are a common enemy is wrong in my opinion.

    You need to calm down.

  4. #163
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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Quote Originally Posted by peras1 View Post
    The discussion and my input is nothing about marriage between different ethnicity's although the topic itself was.

    The discussion I was having is about calling yourself British, taking the British identity, culture and disassociating yourself with your home country(and all that follows), permanently establishing yourself with non Muslims and that the culture of Muslim countries have been influenced massively by Islam for centuries.
    1) Calling yourself British - if it is a fact what is the problem? We have Muslims from all over the world who are settled in non-Muslim countries. So someone who has never been to their "home" country, doesn't speak the language should call themselves from that country, where they are not welcome and would be laughed at? At what point, after how many generations is it OK for a Muslim to start calling themselves a citizen of that country? See my example regarding Muslims in Guyana, Trinidad, South Africa etc. Are they all supposed to call themselves Indian even though their ancestors migrated over a hundred years ago?

    2) Taking the British Identity. What do you mean? The haram? Believing in gay marriage? Or simply enjoying the food, speaking the language etc? Please be specific.

    3) Permanently establishing yourself with non-Muslims. OK again you are talking in code. What do you mean exactly? Do you believe we should all migrate to Muslim lands?

    Why are you getting so heated? Can you not conduct yourself in a calm manner?

  5. #164

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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Quote Originally Posted by slaveuk View Post
    How naive. You should perhaps go to a red light district in one of these countries and look and see whether the majority of customers appear cultural or western. I guarantee that the majority of those who go will be cultural men who are married with families and children..
    How can you guarantee what the clientele at red light districts is?

  6. #165

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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Quote Originally Posted by slaveuk View Post
    Only in the UK it seems that Muslims have a problem with being British.
    Why would someone have that problem anywhere else?

    The truth is that as a Londoner born and bred I will probably find it easier to strike a conversation with a white non-Muslim male than a villager from my ancestral village in Rural Punjab.
    That may hold true for your own personal experiences but it's far-fetched to call it a truth as if applying generally.

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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Quote Originally Posted by quark View Post
    How can you guarantee what the clientele at red light districts is?
    No, I can't guarantee it as no, I don't hang around these places to see who goes in and out. I can only talk about what I hear and read from reliable sources about certain types of men from certain types of backgrounds and professions.

  8. #167
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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Quote Originally Posted by quark View Post
    Why would someone have that problem anywhere else?
    OK very good

    You know what I mean... I meant ESPECIALLY in the UK do Muslims have a major problem attributing themselves as the demonym of that nation. I am aware that this issue exists in other countries too.

    HOWEVER.... Muslims from Trinidad, Guyana, South Africa, Kenya, Malawi, Tanzania, Mauritius are all mainly MIGRANT communities yet they attribute themselves to that country. When did you last meet a Mauritian Muslim who called himself an Indian? Its not big deal. His family moved over from India maybe 150-200 years back so why should he or she not call themselves Mauritian? It is a natural consequence of being there for many generations. It doesn't make them sellouts.

    The point I am making is that once you get to 3rd, 4th generation although your ethnic roots may not change, your culture will be significantly different to that of your great grand parents who arrived here as migrants. This doesn't mean that you are somehow stooges of colonialism or sellouts or anything like that. And people who have never been to their ancestral homes, do not speak the language, do not have much of a link to it, should not be made to feel like they are somehow traitors or sellouts because they regard their country of birth as their natural home and do not label themselves as "Indian" or "Pakistani".

    Don't bring politics into it. People cannot help where they are born or where their great grandparents chose to live.

    Quote Originally Posted by quark View Post
    That may hold true for your own personal experiences but it's far-fetched to call it a truth as if applying generally.
    No, personally I am perfectly at home speaking to a rural villager in Punjab however perhaps my nieces and nephews (offspring of my older second generation cousins) or the 4th generation kids from my family, who don't speak the language and have never been to Pakistan nor have relatives there, would NOT feel at home there and would inevitably have a communication gap with their Pakistani counterparts. This is not far-fetched, this is reality. And since this is marriage discussion I would bet that they would quite possibly find more in common with a white or other revert from the UK than someone from their ancestral home in Pakistan.

    And by the way there is a massive difference between being second generation and being 3rd or 4th generation. As a second generation immigrant I can perhaps hold a conversation with equal ease with both host and origin.

    Let's face it, a lot of the times when people talk about ethnicity and marriage they try and use certain arguments about compatibility etc as a smokescreen for deep-rooted prejudice and racism as well as a fear that somehow their "bloodline" will be polluted. The compatibility argument I think is perfectly valid however only to a point when we talk about migrant communities whose kids have been born an brought up in a certain country and they are being pressurised into marrying someone who is supposedly from the same "culture" as them but will never be compatible as the gulf between them will be massive.

    Perhaps in certain backward communities (I am aware that the y exist) in the UK where English is banned in the home and a patriarchal society exists as it would in a rural village, you could not apply this. But people who live like that in closed communities where all sorts of problems are rife..... thats another discussion entirely.
    Last edited by slaveuk; 09-08-16 at 10:53 AM.

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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    This is a moot question that only comes to bite you in the back if you haven't raised your children properly or worse raised them in the West in which case your not left with much choice. I intend to raise them back home were this question is really irrelevant, but even if hypothetically there was a large diverse Muslim population, this wouldn't be an issue, I would be getting her off married young to an older man that I know very well a distant relative but not against her will that I know will take good care of her, daughters should be pearls protected.

    Never mind other ethnicity even within the same ethnicity it will be someone close as there are still major differences in cultural norms and attitudes, outside is a total NO NO nothing to do with racism as such, but I am a strong believer in biological and cultural predisposition that's very evident and has been for thousands of years, our women don't fair well with strong dictatorial authoritarian male's, not long ago a women I knew called police officer against her husband whom basically caged her like an animal, I don't blame him, but he is naturally predispositioned for that kind of stuff just as she is for the rebellion to such stuff.

    It's not just foreigners but even Somali's raised in Middle Eastern countries, Western countries pick up such despicable traits which caused divorce rates to spiral out of control, the environment and culture a person grows up will change the person, the more generations the more radical the change and conformity the person has to that particular culture, even in Somalia itself up North the strong influence from Arab's have made the male's very Authoritarian and territorial like the typical Arab male's, in the demeanour and acts towards the women (not all but a large majority)

    So hypothetically speaking would I be opposed to an foreign man that lived in my country for a few generations and integrated really well ? and I know of him? absolutely NOT.

  10. #169
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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Quote Originally Posted by Khalid b. Walid View Post
    You mention two key areas here, both of which I would disagree on:


    The issue of losing cultural roots

    Firstly, the loss of culture and connection to roots is inevitable. You cannot stop this when you decide to move permanently to a foreign land and then live there for generations.

    The migrant generation who naturalised into the new country will no doubt be in-touch with their roots and heritage. But there descendants will be to a lesser degree. And by the time you get to the 3rd generation, the link is weak. By the 4th gen onwards, that connection to one's root culture will be effectively gone.

    Many Bangladeshis from the migrant generation initially tried fighting this. They would take their kids back to Bangladesh so they don't forget their roots. Some tried teaching their kids reading and writing in Bengali. But it's a losing battle. My parents even had me and my siblings learning reading and writing Bengali when we were young but we have all forgotten it due to not using it.

    And this same migrant generation have realised its a losing battle and have settled with the idea that their descendants will eventually not even visit Bangladesh. Thats why you now find families selling off the property, land and assets "back-home" and bringing the cash here. They have realised there is no point having thiis empty house, plots of land and so on over there which are just left abandoned. Better of selling it off and bringing the capital to the country you actually reside in.

    Also my Dad was once talking about burial as it was a practice in the old days to send your dead body "back-home" by cargo to be buried. But a point my Dad made was he could do that but then no one would visit his grave as its unlikely anyone will travel to Bangladesh in the future. But if he gets buried here then his children, grandchildren and so one can visit.

    The point I am making here is that it is inevitable that this connection to one's country of origin will eventually be lost gradually as generation after generation stays in the UK, America or any other Western country. The connection will keep weakening from the 2nd gen to 3rd gen to 4th gen and so on.

    If you want to stop it then you have no choice to simply pack up everything and return permanently back to Bangladesh.

    Also another thing is that with the later generations, interracial marriage is more common so that severly weakens any link to the country of origin.


    Islam and a cultural identity

    Secondly, the point you make that having a cultural identity helps in safeguarding one's Islam doesn't really make sense to me.

    When someone is a practising Muslim then their religion is their deen, way of life, constitution. Any cultural background that person has is subservient to their religion. That's why amongst pracitising Muslims you will find they accept some things from a culture but also reject many things.

    I can't see how having a strong Bangladeshi culture can safeguard one's religion when its this strong attachement to the culture in the first place acts as an impediment and obstacle to the religion.

    If you look at families here then you'll see that the one's with the strongest Bangladeshi cultural identities tend to be the most ignorant when it comes to Islam. It is these sort of families that when the son grows a beard, or the daughter wears the niqab, or the children want an Islamic wedding or the child wants to marry outside the race then they are met with fierce opposition.

    Thats why at marriage meetings, questions like "How cultural is your family?" is now common; and statements like "he/she is very cultural" has negative connotations.

    In contrast, the families with the least connections to the cultural roots tend to be most practising when it comes to the deen. They don't have cultural expecations and traditions to impact on their thinking. Instead its a very religio-centric approach looking what does the Quran and Sunnah say on this matter.
    Very well-summarized post. The cultural roots eventually die out. I'm in America, US. my family has come from Europe and Mexico.

    The European side has been here since at least the 1600's and possibly earlier. All that I know and am in touch with is through geneology records. Our family house is the oldest standing house in North America and a museum (Fairbanks House), and I will visit it if I'm in the area, but other than that, there is no connection and no interest in visiting the home countries.

    Now, this thing about always being an immigrant and being seen as taking jobs, not true, either. As I said, I have family from Mexico, even just 4 generations back, but I don't get identified as being Mexican, even by Mexican people. They have no idea. As you said, people mix and appearances change.

    The cultural connections don't mean much religiously, either, and you can see that in reverts such as myself. We found Islam and are going strong on our own, without family or cultural help. I married someone who grew up here since I felt we were most compatible, and we are also ethnically different.

  11. #170

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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Descendants: glorifying our ummah rather than degrading with terrorism or bad character!
    Ethnic cleaning rather than ethnic cleansing is welcome by Muslim Community...
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R1aZvM0BvSQ

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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    No problem, as long person is practising and have good akhlaq.

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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Almost everyone assumes that the white non-muslims as in America and Europe won't throw out the muslims as they did in Spain. One day, slowly, the muslims will be forced to leave, and assuming that muslims mix the ethnicities, where will they go? The country that their grandparents or such came from won't accept and they will be a people without a country or identity which makes them vulnareable.

    The real question that must be asked before racemixing is, can the future of the muslims be permamently be established here or is it just temporary until the host forces the muslims to move?

    And in this case the white non-muslims sooner or later will force the muslims out.

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    Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    @factory

    Umm no

    I have human rights and i am legit british citizen

    I have every right to be here. We only have one world. Let’s share it together, cos we all got nowhere else to go

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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Quote Originally Posted by Faith reloaded View Post
    @factory

    Umm no

    I have human rights and i am legit british citizen

    I have every right to be here. We only have one world. Let’s share it together, cos we all got nowhere else to go
    Well... I kind of wish that wasn't true but it is sadly. Sooner or later the non-muslims will try their best to make muslims leave their countries or at least make their children lose Islam. And that is true sadly, the non-muslims power is even in the muslim countries to make it hard for the muslims.
    Last edited by factory; 31-10-17 at 05:23 AM. Reason: correction

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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    I have no culture. My parents are from two different countries that shares the same culture. These two countries fought and still do, but my parents still decided be together.
    So a big country fight could not separate my parents, will a different ethnicity stop me? No way.

    I don't accociate myself with any culture. My culture is Islam. I am a muslimah (yes, ignore my profile info). As long as my future spouse is muslim then who cares about other stuff?
    I speak and write fluent arabic even tho I have no arabic roots. Will that make me arabic? Nope.
    I grew and was raised in Sweden and inherited all of their good akhlaq, will that make me Swedish? Nope.

    I am a muslimah, I follow Islam, I read my Quran. I will be looking for someone thinking like me without a bunch of cultural nonsence in his head. That's why Swedish people are great, a Swedish revert will not have to sacrifice anything cultural cuz alot of what they do is allowed in Islam. Some doesn't even celebrate their national day. Everyone lives on their own and follows their own goals. Parents has no culture to influence them with.

    Ishallah if I have kids, they can marry whoever they want. Like me

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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Quote Originally Posted by factory View Post
    Well... I kind of wish that wasn't true but it is sadly. Sooner or later the non-muslims will try their best to make muslims leave their countries or at least make their children lose Islam. And that is true sadly, the non-muslims power is even in the muslim countries to make it hard for the muslims.
    Its already happening

    Dont u see these stupid muslim boys who marry kaafirs and end up having kids who are kaafir

    Or those dumb women who fall for kaafirs and end up running away with them

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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Quote Originally Posted by factory View Post
    Almost everyone assumes that the white non-muslims as in America and Europe won't throw out the muslims as they did in Spain. One day, slowly, the muslims will be forced to leave, and assuming that muslims mix the ethnicities, where will they go? The country that their grandparents or such came from won't accept and they will be a people without a country or identity which makes them vulnareable.

    The real question that must be asked before racemixing is, can the future of the muslims be permamently be established here or is it just temporary until the host forces the muslims to move?

    And in this case the white non-muslims sooner or later will force the muslims out.
    It's not that simple. Maybe you can get rid of the African and Asian Muslims, but how do they get rid of Caucasian Muslims? These people can trace their ancestry from Europe and cannot be removed. The idea that Muslims born in their host-European countries will be forcefully removed by some government program is highly unlikely.

    The rise of Caucasian nationalists who make life difficult for Muslims (at the micro level) could be the catalyst for gradual removal, but with the influx of refugees, I doubt that is happening any time soon.

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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Quote Originally Posted by Faith reloaded View Post
    @factory

    Umm no

    I have human rights and i am legit british citizen

    I have every right to be here. We only have one world. Let’s share it together, cos we all got nowhere else to go
    Son, I do the jokes around here!

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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Yes I would only if he is a True practicing Muslim

    I asked my Saudi friend this question he said never because his whole society would turn against him so he fears the people. But if it was not for that he would allow it .

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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Quote Originally Posted by muslim4life76 View Post
    Yes I would only if he is a True practicing Muslim

    I asked my Saudi friend this question he said never because his whole society would turn against him so he fears the people. But if it was not for that he would allow it .
    Some of the Arabs are like that. Unfortunately, especially for their daughters nobody is good enough but their own people. Maybe it is come down to their protective jealously. Allahu Alim

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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Quote Originally Posted by Faith reloaded View Post
    @factory

    Umm no

    I have human rights and i am legit british citizen

    I have every right to be here. We only have one world. Let’s share it together, cos we all got nowhere else to go
    Jews in Germany weren't attacked as soon as the Nazi party took power. They started with defamation campaigns for some time before any oppression happened. In Germany there was a major propaganda campaign against Poland before they attacked the Poles. They had to make the German people feel threatened before they invaded. They staged a fake attack in a radio station next to the German-Polish border and then claimed it was Poles who did it and then they invaded.
    نحن قوما اعزنا الله بالإسلام فإن ابتغينا عزة بغيره أذلنا الله

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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Quote Originally Posted by DaughterOfAdam View Post
    I know many of you are not parents and do not have adult children, but inshaAllah if you live long enough to do so, would you allow them to marry outside of your ethnicity?

    Also, what kind of conditions would you require someone to have in order for your son/daughter to be allowed to marry them? E.g. do they need to be earning x amount of money etc.?

    Who am I to disagree? As long as they're marrying a muslim / muslimah than I'm okay with it (provided that they're marrying someone of the opposite sex).

  24. #183
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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Sad how some people are saying no. How is that not racism?

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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    I'd encourage them (Im still young lol) , hate my bangladeshi culture, they prefer culture over religion (most) hence why they hit their own children over petty reasons and expect their children to bend over backwards but don't want to fulfil their duties towards their children.

    Luckily western bengali's aren't as extreme so future bengalis won't get beat up and berated over no reasons like I did. Still. Hate. This. Stupid. Culture.

    To mods: I don't know if this is considered backbiting my people (Bangladeshi's), if it is then please delete my post.
    Last edited by Sorrow'; 05-11-17 at 03:31 AM.

  26. #185
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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Quote Originally Posted by Juwairiyyah View Post
    Sad how some people are saying no. How is that not racism?
    Haha, I voted yes but I wouldn't necessarily say those who voted No are racist. Some people just want to preserve there own culture.

  27. #186
    a muslim in a odd place HelloEverybody's Avatar
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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    yes, .... it could be worse.

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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Quote Originally Posted by Juwairiyyah View Post
    Sad how some people are saying no. How is that not racism?
    Preserving one's ethnicity is not racism.

  29. #188
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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Quote Originally Posted by factory View Post
    Preserving one's ethnicity is not racism.
    Agreed. I voted no

  30. #189
    VERSION : Alpha 6.6 Aetos's Avatar
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    AW: Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    I wanted to vote YES,

    Count me as YES
    'A slave's life is all you understand, you know nothing of freedom. For if you did, you would have encouraged us to fight on, not only with our spears, but with everything we have'

  31. #190
    "رَوْحٌ وَ رَيْحَان" Tayoofa's Avatar
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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    Quote Originally Posted by muslim4life76 View Post
    Yes I would only if he is a True practicing Muslim

    I asked my Saudi friend this question he said never because his whole society would turn against him so he fears the people. But if it was not for that he would allow it .
    I truly understand your friend that's why I will say it depends on the situation of society and where I live ...
    Ibn Al Qayyim may Allah have mercy on him said: ("
    The heart on its journey towards Allah the Exalted is like that of a bird. Love is its head, and fear and hope are its two wings. When the head is healthy, then the two wings will fly well. When the head is cut off, the bird will die. When either of two wings is damaged, the bird becomes vulnerable to every hunter and predator..”
    )

  32. #191
    اصبر aynina's Avatar
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    Re: Would you allow your children to marry outside of their ethnicity?

    No they have to marry belgian, and not walloon, flemmish! Imagine they wanna marry one of those stinkin, good for nothing waloons!

    Gotto keep the honour in the family
    يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلنَّاسُ ٱعْبُدُوا۟ رَبَّكُمُ ٱلَّذِى خَلَقَكُمْ وَٱلَّذِينَ مِن قَبْلِكُمْ لَعَلَّكُمْ تَتَّقُونَ

    O mankind, worship your Lord, who created you and those before you, that you may become righteous

    Surah Al Baqarah ayah 21

  33. #192
    اصبر aynina's Avatar
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    Marrying one with a different culture



    What are the advantages and disadvantages in marrying someone who grew up in a different culture, different upbringing.
    يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلنَّاسُ ٱعْبُدُوا۟ رَبَّكُمُ ٱلَّذِى خَلَقَكُمْ وَٱلَّذِينَ مِن قَبْلِكُمْ لَعَلَّكُمْ تَتَّقُونَ

    O mankind, worship your Lord, who created you and those before you, that you may become righteous

    Surah Al Baqarah ayah 21

  34. #193
    Senior Member Azraael's Avatar
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    Re: Marrying one with a different culture

    Quote Originally Posted by aynina View Post


    What are the advantages and disadvantages in marrying someone who grew up in a different culture, different upbringing.
    If your parents are traditional for them it would be awkward.

    Advantage is that marriage will seem more exciting because you can explore your spouse's culture.

    However I would be very careful to ensure the spouse and you can speak fluently to each other. Don't want miscommunications.

  35. #194
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    Re: Marrying one with a different culture

    Learn from each other how to be more tolerant
    Have children fluent in many languages lol (and possibly more open minded)
    Meet different persons and understand different culture, history, food, etc
    Maybe genetically strong off spring

    On the down side :

    Children identity (as Muslims, religion is enough)
    Disapproval from family sometimes
    Culture shock

  36. #195
    Internal Screaming shay5's Avatar
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    Re: Marrying one with a different culture

    Quote Originally Posted by aynina View Post


    What are the advantages and disadvantages in marrying someone who grew up in a different culture, different upbringing.
    I am sure there are threads that answer this Q, also you were married in a different culture so you must have an idea of the pros and cons....I have knowledge of this so if you need to ask a specific question then you can PM me...
    .

  37. #196
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    Re: Marrying one with a different culture

    Salaam,

    My culture is degenerate so I think a woman from a different culture would be quite nice. Nice to experience something different

  38. #197
    Odan .khayriyyah.'s Avatar
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    Re: Marrying one with a different culture

    Quote Originally Posted by Ayman2 View Post
    Learn from each other how to be more tolerant
    Have children fluent in many languages lol (and possibly more open minded)
    Meet different persons and understand different culture, history, food, etc
    Maybe genetically strong off spring

    On the down side :

    Children identity (as Muslims, religion is enough)
    Disapproval from family sometimes
    Culture shock
    What do you mean by childrens identity, though?

  39. #198
    التبع اليماني obaid_m's Avatar
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    Re: Marrying one with a different culture

    If he is independent financially, not living under his parents roof, then you should be good.
    Last edited by obaid_m; 14-11-17 at 06:31 PM.
    “Have you seen he who has taken as his god his [own] desire, and Allah has sent him astray due to knowledge and has set a seal upon his hearing and his heart and put over his vision a veil? So who will guide him after Allah ? Then will you not be reminded? And they say, “There is not but our worldly life; we die and live, and nothing destroys us except time.” And they have of that no knowledge; they are only assuming.” Quran 45:23-24

  40. #199
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    Re: Marrying one with a different culture

    Quote Originally Posted by .khayriyyah. View Post
    What do you mean by childrens identity, though?
    They could be lost between two cultures for example.
    As I said, for Muslims it should not matter really

  41. #200
    اصبر aynina's Avatar
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    Re: Marrying one with a different culture

    Quote Originally Posted by Azraael View Post
    If your parents are traditional for them it would be awkward.

    Advantage is that marriage will seem more exciting because you can explore your spouse's culture.

    However I would be very careful to ensure the spouse and you can speak fluently to each other. Don't want miscommunications.
    Miscomunications can be nice, you might never fight bc everything is blamed on misvomunication lol

    Quote Originally Posted by Ayman2 View Post
    Learn from each other how to be more tolerant
    Have children fluent in many languages lol (and possibly more open minded)
    Meet different persons and understand different culture, history, food, etc
    Maybe genetically strong off spring

    On the down side :

    Children identity (as Muslims, religion is enough)
    Disapproval from family sometimes
    Culture shock
    Yea families sometimes dislike it
    Quote Originally Posted by shay5 View Post
    I am sure there are threads that answer this Q, also you were married in a different culture so you must have an idea of the pros and cons....I have knowledge of this so if you need to ask a specific question then you can PM me...
    Well my ex grew up in the west though so yea theres cultural differences but they are familiar with my culture whereas if u marry someone from a different continent they aremt and neither am i i guess
    Quote Originally Posted by obaid_m View Post
    If he is independent financially, not living under his parents roof, then you should be good.
    Vwry good poimt lol
    يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلنَّاسُ ٱعْبُدُوا۟ رَبَّكُمُ ٱلَّذِى خَلَقَكُمْ وَٱلَّذِينَ مِن قَبْلِكُمْ لَعَلَّكُمْ تَتَّقُونَ

    O mankind, worship your Lord, who created you and those before you, that you may become righteous

    Surah Al Baqarah ayah 21

 

 

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