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View Poll Results: What is preventing you from getting married?

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  • Sisters: Wali won't give permission

    43 10.21%
  • Sisters: No one asked

    85 20.19%
  • Sisters: Not finished education

    66 15.68%
  • Sisters: Children from previous marriage

    12 2.85%
  • Sisters: No pious Brothers

    68 16.15%
  • Brothers: No money

    149 35.39%
  • Brothers: Her Wali won't give permission

    25 5.94%
  • Brothers: Not finished education

    77 18.29%
  • Brothers: Children from previous marriage

    15 3.56%
  • Brothers: No pious Sisters

    89 21.14%
Multiple Choice Poll.
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  1. #1
    Odan Juvegirl's Avatar
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    Why can't people get married?

    As salaamualeikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatu,

    Hello Muslim peeps!

    I keep hearing about women who can't get married and men who can't get married and I keep thinking - why not? What is preventing people from getting married?

    Comments! Suggestions!

  2. #41
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Sorry uncle what is wali in English

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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    It may not add or take away, but it has the potential to distort! And wearing shalwar kameeze/trousers was a relatively trivial example to what I had in mind. Aha.

    Thanks for you reply

  4. #43
    Super Moderator Jenicca's Avatar
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Because Allah swt azza wa jall in his infinite hikmah and rahmah is saving the most super duper amazing, pious sunnah abiding turbaned beardo for me inshaallah.

    Actually, I know someone just like that. I wish I could marry him, inshaAllah.

    Id be so overjoyed, id leave the forum........for a while at least !!
    وَالْعَصْرِ

    إِنَّ الْإِنسَانَ لَفِي خُسْرٍ

    إِلَّا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا وَعَمِلُوا الصَّالِحَاتِ وَتَوَاصَوْا بِالْحَقِّ وَتَوَاصَوْا بِالصَّبْرِ

    "If Allah (swt) only sent this Surah to us, for the guidance of Mankind, this will be enough for usĒ - Imam Shaafi'ee r.a.

    "Yeh dunya daar e faani hain, Tum apna dil mat lagaon, Ganimat samaj zinadagee ki bahar, aana na hoga, yahaa baar baar......"

    Khanqah Habibiyah

  5. #44
    Odan Juvegirl's Avatar
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by SummerIntheCity View Post
    I haven't met many born-Muslims who don't give in the cultural rubbish.
    I do. They might like some cultural things, but they put Islam first. Keep looking inshallah

    Quote Originally Posted by uncle umar View Post
    im not being that picky. im just looking for one quality.

    just one. but nobody really has it.
    Okay, c'mon inquiring minds want to know.

  6. #45
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by Jenicca View Post
    Because Allah swt azza wa jall in his infinite hikmah and rahmah is saving the most super duper amazing, pious sunnah abiding turbaned beardo for me inshaallah.

    Actually, I know someone just like that. I wish I could marry him inshaallah.

    Is be so overjoyed id leave the forum........for a while!
    then go make a proposal sister. he cant read ur mind
    And the (faithful) slaves of the Most Gracious (All‚h) are those who walk on the earth in humility and sedateness, and when the foolish address them (with bad words) they reply back with mild words of gentleness. (25:63)

    O You who believe! Shall I guide you to a trade that will save you from a painful torment? (10) That you believe in All‚h and His Messenger (Muhammad SAW),and that you strive hard and fight in the Cause of All‚h with your wealth and your lives, that will be better for you, if you but know! (11) (If you do so) He will forgive you your sins, and admit you into Gardens under which rivers flow, and pleasant dwellings in Adn (Edn) Paradise; that is indeed the great success. (12)

    JazakAllah khair for the duas but i would prefer duas for shahadah instead.

    sponsor an orphan

  7. #46
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by Juvegirl View Post
    I do. They might like some cultural things, but they put Islam first. Keep looking inshallah

    Okay, c'mon inquiring minds want to know.

    im not saying. i know what im looking for. if i see it in a sister then i make a proposal.
    And the (faithful) slaves of the Most Gracious (All‚h) are those who walk on the earth in humility and sedateness, and when the foolish address them (with bad words) they reply back with mild words of gentleness. (25:63)

    O You who believe! Shall I guide you to a trade that will save you from a painful torment? (10) That you believe in All‚h and His Messenger (Muhammad SAW),and that you strive hard and fight in the Cause of All‚h with your wealth and your lives, that will be better for you, if you but know! (11) (If you do so) He will forgive you your sins, and admit you into Gardens under which rivers flow, and pleasant dwellings in Adn (Edn) Paradise; that is indeed the great success. (12)

    JazakAllah khair for the duas but i would prefer duas for shahadah instead.

    sponsor an orphan

  8. #47
    ایک بار پکار کے تو دیکھو .mirror.'s Avatar
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    That's the thing. Marry a pious brother who knows his deen, so he won't allow anything to get distorted. It has more to do with the level of imaan and ilm, than revert or born Muslims.

    Anyways, may Allah bless you with a righteous husband.
    Secure few moments, everyday, to reflect upon the innumerable blessings of Allah and thank Him for bestowing them upon you.

    "A person who is blessed with the ability to be grateful, shall never be deprived of barakah and increase in blessings."
    - Rasulullah (صلی اللہ علیہ وسلم)‎

  9. #48
    Odan Juvegirl's Avatar
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by uncle umar View Post
    im not being that picky. im just looking for one quality.

    just one. but nobody really has it.
    Quote Originally Posted by uncle umar View Post
    im not saying. i know what im looking for. if i see it in a sister then i make a proposal.
    Okay bro, it's your dice, but considering I'M IN YOUR CITY and I happen to know SINGLE MUSLIMAHS you might want to spread the knowledge a little that I could perhaps HELP YOU FIND HER.

    But you know, whatever.

  10. #49
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by Juvegirl View Post
    Okay bro, it's your dice, but considering I'M IN YOUR CITY and I happen to know SINGLE MUSLIMAHS you might want to spread the knowledge a little that I could perhaps HELP YOU FIND HER.

    But you know, whatever.
    ill send u a pm
    And the (faithful) slaves of the Most Gracious (All‚h) are those who walk on the earth in humility and sedateness, and when the foolish address them (with bad words) they reply back with mild words of gentleness. (25:63)

    O You who believe! Shall I guide you to a trade that will save you from a painful torment? (10) That you believe in All‚h and His Messenger (Muhammad SAW),and that you strive hard and fight in the Cause of All‚h with your wealth and your lives, that will be better for you, if you but know! (11) (If you do so) He will forgive you your sins, and admit you into Gardens under which rivers flow, and pleasant dwellings in Adn (Edn) Paradise; that is indeed the great success. (12)

    JazakAllah khair for the duas but i would prefer duas for shahadah instead.

    sponsor an orphan

  11. #50
    weird
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    its hijra Im such a genius

  12. #51
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by weird View Post
    its hijra Im such a genius
    anyone who knows anything about me knows i want to do this.
    And the (faithful) slaves of the Most Gracious (All‚h) are those who walk on the earth in humility and sedateness, and when the foolish address them (with bad words) they reply back with mild words of gentleness. (25:63)

    O You who believe! Shall I guide you to a trade that will save you from a painful torment? (10) That you believe in All‚h and His Messenger (Muhammad SAW),and that you strive hard and fight in the Cause of All‚h with your wealth and your lives, that will be better for you, if you but know! (11) (If you do so) He will forgive you your sins, and admit you into Gardens under which rivers flow, and pleasant dwellings in Adn (Edn) Paradise; that is indeed the great success. (12)

    JazakAllah khair for the duas but i would prefer duas for shahadah instead.

    sponsor an orphan

  13. #52
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Thank you.

  14. #53
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Don't wish to ruin my life.

  15. #54
    Forever Muslimah*'s Avatar
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    not enough practising brothers out there. maybe

  16. #55
    Odan *asiya*'s Avatar
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by Juvegirl View Post
    As salaamualeikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatu,

    Hello Muslim peeps!

    I keep hearing about women who can't get married and men who can't get married and I keep thinking - why not? What is preventing people from getting married?

    Comments! Suggestions!


    from my observations, seems to be a mix of things. many men are still at school till theyre almost 30, racist parents, spinless brainwashed men, women with racist wali, women asking for huge mahr along with furniture, fancy rings, fancy dresses suitcases full of gifts, gold, dresses for her ( her sisters and mother ) matching tablecloths huge wedding halls, and tiered wedding cakes and brothers cant afford that because theyve been in school for 25 years..
    "O you who believe! Stand out firmly for justice, as witnesses to Allah, even as against yourselves, or your parents, or your kin, and whether it be (against) rich or poor: for Allah can best protect both. Follow not the lusts (of your hearts), lest you swerve, and if you distort (justice) or decline to do justice, verily Allah is well-acquainted with all that you do." [An-Nisa 4:135]

    The Prophet said:

    "Whosoever leaves off obedience and separates from the Jamaa'ah and dies, he dies a death of jaahiliyyah. Whoever fights under the banner of the blind, becoming angry for 'asabiyyah (nationalism/tribalism/partisanship) or calling to 'asabiyyah, or assisting 'asabiyyah, then dies, he dies a death of jaahiliyyah."

    muslim

    Narrated 'Abdullah:

    The Prophet, said, "Abusing a Muslim is Fusuq (evil doing) and killing him is Kufr (disbelief)." sahih bukhari


    "Creeping upon you is the diseases of those people before you: envy and hatred. And hatred is the thing that shaves. I do not say it shaves the hair but it shaves the religion!

    By the One in whose Hand is my soul, you will not enter paradise until you believe, and you will not believe until you love one another. Certainly, let me inform you of that which may establish such things: spread the greetings and peace among yourselves."

    [Recorded by Imam Ahmad and Al-Tirmidhi]


  17. #56
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    well i thought that with my new job ide be able to afford it.

    looks like i was wrong. so add one more the the im too poor and therefore not worth it list.
    And the (faithful) slaves of the Most Gracious (All‚h) are those who walk on the earth in humility and sedateness, and when the foolish address them (with bad words) they reply back with mild words of gentleness. (25:63)

    O You who believe! Shall I guide you to a trade that will save you from a painful torment? (10) That you believe in All‚h and His Messenger (Muhammad SAW),and that you strive hard and fight in the Cause of All‚h with your wealth and your lives, that will be better for you, if you but know! (11) (If you do so) He will forgive you your sins, and admit you into Gardens under which rivers flow, and pleasant dwellings in Adn (Edn) Paradise; that is indeed the great success. (12)

    JazakAllah khair for the duas but i would prefer duas for shahadah instead.

    sponsor an orphan

  18. #57
    Odan *asiya*'s Avatar
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by uncle umar View Post
    well i thought that with my new job ide be able to afford it.

    looks like i was wrong. so add one more the the im too poor and therefore not worth it list.
    if a woman rejects u for lack of wealth say alhamdulillah, and keep looking and making duaa because Allah ta ala knows where she is in this world, and Allah ta ala will unite u if u trust in Him ta ala.
    "O you who believe! Stand out firmly for justice, as witnesses to Allah, even as against yourselves, or your parents, or your kin, and whether it be (against) rich or poor: for Allah can best protect both. Follow not the lusts (of your hearts), lest you swerve, and if you distort (justice) or decline to do justice, verily Allah is well-acquainted with all that you do." [An-Nisa 4:135]

    The Prophet said:

    "Whosoever leaves off obedience and separates from the Jamaa'ah and dies, he dies a death of jaahiliyyah. Whoever fights under the banner of the blind, becoming angry for 'asabiyyah (nationalism/tribalism/partisanship) or calling to 'asabiyyah, or assisting 'asabiyyah, then dies, he dies a death of jaahiliyyah."

    muslim

    Narrated 'Abdullah:

    The Prophet, said, "Abusing a Muslim is Fusuq (evil doing) and killing him is Kufr (disbelief)." sahih bukhari


    "Creeping upon you is the diseases of those people before you: envy and hatred. And hatred is the thing that shaves. I do not say it shaves the hair but it shaves the religion!

    By the One in whose Hand is my soul, you will not enter paradise until you believe, and you will not believe until you love one another. Certainly, let me inform you of that which may establish such things: spread the greetings and peace among yourselves."

    [Recorded by Imam Ahmad and Al-Tirmidhi]


  19. #58
    شهيد إن شاء الله
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by *asiya* View Post
    if a woman rejects u for lack of wealth say alhamdulillah, and keep looking and making duaa because Allah ta ala knows where she is in this world, and Allah ta ala will unite u if u trust in Him ta ala.
    the hur al ayn are better then the women of this world.

    ill keep my hopes for them.
    And the (faithful) slaves of the Most Gracious (All‚h) are those who walk on the earth in humility and sedateness, and when the foolish address them (with bad words) they reply back with mild words of gentleness. (25:63)

    O You who believe! Shall I guide you to a trade that will save you from a painful torment? (10) That you believe in All‚h and His Messenger (Muhammad SAW),and that you strive hard and fight in the Cause of All‚h with your wealth and your lives, that will be better for you, if you but know! (11) (If you do so) He will forgive you your sins, and admit you into Gardens under which rivers flow, and pleasant dwellings in Adn (Edn) Paradise; that is indeed the great success. (12)

    JazakAllah khair for the duas but i would prefer duas for shahadah instead.

    sponsor an orphan

  20. #59
    Odan *asiya*'s Avatar
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by uncle umar View Post
    the hur al ayn are better then the women of this world.

    ill keep my hopes for them.
    the hur al ayn will not support u in this world they wont protect u from fitnah, and they wont give u children who will be a comfort to u if u reach old age, and who will make duaa for u when u are in the grave. The women of this earth who make it to jannah will be waiting for their husbands when he enters insha Allah, and they will be more beautiful than the hur al ayn and the earth women increase in beauty more and more everytime u leave and return to them.

    hur al ayn are alright, but earth women who make it to jannah are better in so many ways.
    "O you who believe! Stand out firmly for justice, as witnesses to Allah, even as against yourselves, or your parents, or your kin, and whether it be (against) rich or poor: for Allah can best protect both. Follow not the lusts (of your hearts), lest you swerve, and if you distort (justice) or decline to do justice, verily Allah is well-acquainted with all that you do." [An-Nisa 4:135]

    The Prophet said:

    "Whosoever leaves off obedience and separates from the Jamaa'ah and dies, he dies a death of jaahiliyyah. Whoever fights under the banner of the blind, becoming angry for 'asabiyyah (nationalism/tribalism/partisanship) or calling to 'asabiyyah, or assisting 'asabiyyah, then dies, he dies a death of jaahiliyyah."

    muslim

    Narrated 'Abdullah:

    The Prophet, said, "Abusing a Muslim is Fusuq (evil doing) and killing him is Kufr (disbelief)." sahih bukhari


    "Creeping upon you is the diseases of those people before you: envy and hatred. And hatred is the thing that shaves. I do not say it shaves the hair but it shaves the religion!

    By the One in whose Hand is my soul, you will not enter paradise until you believe, and you will not believe until you love one another. Certainly, let me inform you of that which may establish such things: spread the greetings and peace among yourselves."

    [Recorded by Imam Ahmad and Al-Tirmidhi]


  21. #60
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by *asiya* View Post
    the hur al ayn will not support u in this world they wont protect u from fitnah, and they wont give u children who will be a comfort to u if u reach old age, and who will make duaa for u when u are in the grave. The women of this earth who make it to jannah will be waiting for their husbands when he enters insha Allah, and they will be more beautiful than the hur al ayn and the earth women increase in beauty more and more everytime u leave and return to them.

    hur al ayn are alright, but earth women who make it to jannah are better in so many ways.
    inshallah ur one of them.
    And the (faithful) slaves of the Most Gracious (All‚h) are those who walk on the earth in humility and sedateness, and when the foolish address them (with bad words) they reply back with mild words of gentleness. (25:63)

    O You who believe! Shall I guide you to a trade that will save you from a painful torment? (10) That you believe in All‚h and His Messenger (Muhammad SAW),and that you strive hard and fight in the Cause of All‚h with your wealth and your lives, that will be better for you, if you but know! (11) (If you do so) He will forgive you your sins, and admit you into Gardens under which rivers flow, and pleasant dwellings in Adn (Edn) Paradise; that is indeed the great success. (12)

    JazakAllah khair for the duas but i would prefer duas for shahadah instead.

    sponsor an orphan

  22. #61
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    everyone wants get married in this thread.......is anyone else scared to get married? spending the rest of your life with this one person. what if they're not right. and what if responsibility, independance, perseverance, and maturity are qualities that you are lacking in, but are essential for the husband/father as head of the household. Scholars repeatedly urge us to get married young because this is from the sunnah. But I'm still struggling to care of myself. imagine having a wife too and then a few years down the road...kids. too scary. and today there are so many divorces happening with young muslim couples. marriage is a joke. if it's not working, then just rip it apart. forget trying to work on it. he's not pious enough...she's disrespectful......he's this...she's that. people are just getting married.....for the sake of getting married. isnt it scary to think that you are going to live with someone who may be soo different to you in every way, when it comes to deen, dunya, whatnot. I think i'll wait a few years.

  23. #62
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    [QUOTE=aprils;4486847]
    Quote Originally Posted by innocent_girl View Post
    my culture ,,in Somali culture we dont have the arrange marrige thing ,,i wish we have it ,, yeah so every somali girl that i know have to go dating and wedding to be seen. and if u do u cant find a religious brother at wedding nor he will be fine with dating ,, arrrrrrrgh.[/QUOTE
    I agree with you sis. I am 24 and I want to get married really quickly. Wish I can find the pious brother!
    But internet parents have a stigma and it scares me. Please find me one.
    u right walahiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii all this stigma about internet marrigs in our community is unreal and 4ever u will be labeled as the internet desperado lol

  24. #63
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by Juvegirl View Post
    lol, I have a friend from Sri Lanka who wanted to marry a white revert. She did too and they are very happy mashallah.

    I think I know that couple.....................oh no..my internet life and real life are coming together.........must leave ummah.

    brb...making a goodbye final drama thread.

  25. #64
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by shafsbhai View Post
    I think I know that couple.....................oh no..my internet life and real life are coming together.........must leave ummah.

    brb...making a goodbye final drama thread.
    lol
    And the (faithful) slaves of the Most Gracious (All‚h) are those who walk on the earth in humility and sedateness, and when the foolish address them (with bad words) they reply back with mild words of gentleness. (25:63)

    O You who believe! Shall I guide you to a trade that will save you from a painful torment? (10) That you believe in All‚h and His Messenger (Muhammad SAW),and that you strive hard and fight in the Cause of All‚h with your wealth and your lives, that will be better for you, if you but know! (11) (If you do so) He will forgive you your sins, and admit you into Gardens under which rivers flow, and pleasant dwellings in Adn (Edn) Paradise; that is indeed the great success. (12)

    JazakAllah khair for the duas but i would prefer duas for shahadah instead.

    sponsor an orphan

  26. #65
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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Have you seen the "Cost of Wedding" thread? Nuff said.

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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by MoMo. View Post
    Have you seen the "Cost of Wedding" thread? Nuff said.
    lol its hopeless bro. no wonder kuffar think were backwards.
    And the (faithful) slaves of the Most Gracious (All‚h) are those who walk on the earth in humility and sedateness, and when the foolish address them (with bad words) they reply back with mild words of gentleness. (25:63)

    O You who believe! Shall I guide you to a trade that will save you from a painful torment? (10) That you believe in All‚h and His Messenger (Muhammad SAW),and that you strive hard and fight in the Cause of All‚h with your wealth and your lives, that will be better for you, if you but know! (11) (If you do so) He will forgive you your sins, and admit you into Gardens under which rivers flow, and pleasant dwellings in Adn (Edn) Paradise; that is indeed the great success. (12)

    JazakAllah khair for the duas but i would prefer duas for shahadah instead.

    sponsor an orphan

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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Iam fat, short, disabled, unattractive by their standards, yes a brother ones told me I was not hot enough boy did that hurt, another one told me he ONLY wanted arab, white and asian women, iam not educated, I dont socialise, my family wont help, I have male mahrams but they are not much of a wali, iam too old according to alot of brothers, iam a divorcee. The list goes on and on. I have been lowering my standards over the years without comprimising the potentials level of deen but I know with all these obstacles in my way I will never get married.

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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Just haven't got the money. And no way I can afford a place of mines right now so its not going to happen for a while.

    I've had a couple of people of families suggest their daughters but I am in no position to get married and provide for anyone and think it would be very selfish to just say 'yes', I would feel embarrassed as I have no real material wealth to show.

    It doesn't get me down though. I do enjoy being single.

    I do get approached by women but there is no way I will fall into sin, I don't date at all, don't even talk to girls.

    I just pray that God guides me to the person who is right for me and who I am right for. And thats it.

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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by uncle umar View Post
    lol its hopeless bro. no wonder kuffar think were backwards.
    you guys should stop making it like all the sisters are after money. look at the poll on that other thread
    maybe you're just picky there's no need to blame women

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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lei View Post
    Iam fat, short, disabled, unattractive by their standards, yes a brother ones told me I was not hot enough boy did that hurt, another one told me he ONLY wanted arab, white and asian women, iam not educated, I dont socialise, my family wont help, I have male mahrams but they are not much of a wali, iam too old according to alot of brothers, iam a divorcee. The list goes on and on. I have been lowering my standards over the years without comprimising the potentials level of deen but I know with all these obstacles in my way I will never get married.
    ooh bless sister plz dont listen to them haters ,,, ur man will come inshallah stay positive sis
    xoxo

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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by anonymous_mehip View Post
    you guys should stop making it like all the sisters are after money. look at the poll on that other thread
    maybe you're just picky there's no need to blame women
    or maybe most women are gold-diggers
    And the (faithful) slaves of the Most Gracious (All‚h) are those who walk on the earth in humility and sedateness, and when the foolish address them (with bad words) they reply back with mild words of gentleness. (25:63)

    O You who believe! Shall I guide you to a trade that will save you from a painful torment? (10) That you believe in All‚h and His Messenger (Muhammad SAW),and that you strive hard and fight in the Cause of All‚h with your wealth and your lives, that will be better for you, if you but know! (11) (If you do so) He will forgive you your sins, and admit you into Gardens under which rivers flow, and pleasant dwellings in Adn (Edn) Paradise; that is indeed the great success. (12)

    JazakAllah khair for the duas but i would prefer duas for shahadah instead.

    sponsor an orphan

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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    w.e

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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by uncle umar View Post
    or maybe most women are gold-diggers
    lol noo it depends on where your from and such,dont worry bro.

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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by uncle umar View Post
    or maybe most women are gold-diggers
    well then, they can pick my nose.

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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by *Aisha View Post
    lol noo it depends on where your from and such,dont worry bro.
    listen. i dont mind spending everything i got on my wife. after all that kinda comes with the job description.

    but if i cant meet a womans standards even after spending everything, thats says something. i dont know who these guys are who can afford such women but all the brothers i know are like me who cant afford something.

    which explains why we are still single.
    And the (faithful) slaves of the Most Gracious (All‚h) are those who walk on the earth in humility and sedateness, and when the foolish address them (with bad words) they reply back with mild words of gentleness. (25:63)

    O You who believe! Shall I guide you to a trade that will save you from a painful torment? (10) That you believe in All‚h and His Messenger (Muhammad SAW),and that you strive hard and fight in the Cause of All‚h with your wealth and your lives, that will be better for you, if you but know! (11) (If you do so) He will forgive you your sins, and admit you into Gardens under which rivers flow, and pleasant dwellings in Adn (Edn) Paradise; that is indeed the great success. (12)

    JazakAllah khair for the duas but i would prefer duas for shahadah instead.

    sponsor an orphan

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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by shafsbhai View Post
    well then, they can pick my nose.
    yuck,,, no need for that ,,,,have mature conv ppl

    but seriously why the brothers are complaining about 5 grand ,,,,i dont get it ^ ^

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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by innocent_girl View Post
    yuck,,, no need for that ,,,,have mature conv ppl

    but seriously why the brothers are complaining about 5 grand ,,,,i dont get it ^ ^
    lol we explained a few times.

    now im not surprised on why people go and get girlfriends instead. people put too many stings attached to the point where only the rich can afford it.
    And the (faithful) slaves of the Most Gracious (All‚h) are those who walk on the earth in humility and sedateness, and when the foolish address them (with bad words) they reply back with mild words of gentleness. (25:63)

    O You who believe! Shall I guide you to a trade that will save you from a painful torment? (10) That you believe in All‚h and His Messenger (Muhammad SAW),and that you strive hard and fight in the Cause of All‚h with your wealth and your lives, that will be better for you, if you but know! (11) (If you do so) He will forgive you your sins, and admit you into Gardens under which rivers flow, and pleasant dwellings in Adn (Edn) Paradise; that is indeed the great success. (12)

    JazakAllah khair for the duas but i would prefer duas for shahadah instead.

    sponsor an orphan

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    I just find the entire thing interesting. I wanted to get married and I wanted to marry my husband. So I made it easy and hard at the same time. I sacrificed a lot to have a wedding we could afford, but I done regret any of it. The hard was regarding the Mahr, as I said in the other thread, I wanted to be certain he could save money, and I knew his income. If his income hadve been less, so too would have been my Mahr.

    For the majority of the sisters who want to get married, have you considered doing something like this?
    "Do not let your hatred of a people incite you to aggression." Qur'an 5:2

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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lei View Post
    I know with all these obstacles in my way I will never get married.

    sister dont speak ill of yourself, there are clearly enough bad people who will do that for u audu billah. Allah ta ala has created someone for everyone, and Allah ta ala knows where ur husband is, make duaa trust whole heartedly in Allah to bring u together in marriage and dont ever give into the whispers of shaitan. while ur waiting for that day, learn ur deen and do everything u can to gain the pleasure of Allah ta ala. either way, you cant loose insha Allah. mos of all think good of Allah ta ala and have patience.
    "O you who believe! Stand out firmly for justice, as witnesses to Allah, even as against yourselves, or your parents, or your kin, and whether it be (against) rich or poor: for Allah can best protect both. Follow not the lusts (of your hearts), lest you swerve, and if you distort (justice) or decline to do justice, verily Allah is well-acquainted with all that you do." [An-Nisa 4:135]

    The Prophet said:

    "Whosoever leaves off obedience and separates from the Jamaa'ah and dies, he dies a death of jaahiliyyah. Whoever fights under the banner of the blind, becoming angry for 'asabiyyah (nationalism/tribalism/partisanship) or calling to 'asabiyyah, or assisting 'asabiyyah, then dies, he dies a death of jaahiliyyah."

    muslim

    Narrated 'Abdullah:

    The Prophet, said, "Abusing a Muslim is Fusuq (evil doing) and killing him is Kufr (disbelief)." sahih bukhari


    "Creeping upon you is the diseases of those people before you: envy and hatred. And hatred is the thing that shaves. I do not say it shaves the hair but it shaves the religion!

    By the One in whose Hand is my soul, you will not enter paradise until you believe, and you will not believe until you love one another. Certainly, let me inform you of that which may establish such things: spread the greetings and peace among yourselves."

    [Recorded by Imam Ahmad and Al-Tirmidhi]


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    Re: Why can't people get married?

    Quote Originally Posted by shafsbhai View Post
    everyone wants get married in this thread.......is anyone else scared to get married? spending the rest of your life with this one person. what if they're not right. and what if responsibility, independance, perseverance, and maturity are qualities that you are lacking in, but are essential for the husband/father as head of the household. Scholars repeatedly urge us to get married young because this is from the sunnah. But I'm still struggling to care of myself. imagine having a wife too and then a few years down the road...kids. too scary. and today there are so many divorces happening with young muslim couples. marriage is a joke. if it's not working, then just rip it apart. forget trying to work on it. he's not pious enough...she's disrespectful......he's this...she's that. people are just getting married.....for the sake of getting married. isnt it scary to think that you are going to live with someone who may be soo different to you in every way, when it comes to deen, dunya, whatnot. I think i'll wait a few years.
    Don't stress sister, your time will come, Insha'Allah. Have some patience as Allah(SWT) is with those who are patient.

 

 

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