I just wanted to start by giving my greetings to you all, as this is my first post here, and my first time on a Muslim forum. I realised recently that I haven't been in touch enough with my religion (my parents don't really tell me things much, and I don't have many muslim friends) so I have begun to read up a lot on things myself and I am hoping to become a better Muslim. May Allah guide us all to the path of righteousness, and peace and blessings to you all. I would greatly appreciate your help.
Right now I am in a bad situation.. and it's causing me much emotional stress. But it's my fault and I blame only myself. I have fallen for a non-believer, and made the mistake of forming a relationship with him, unbeknownst to my parents. I have not touched this person. At the time I didn't know anything about what is said about this in the Qur'an.. when I found out that I would never be allowed to be with this person, I guess I have since been holding on to the hope that one day he would accept Islam. I don't know how to pray, but I am very aware of God and sometimes I talk to Him and ask Him to guide him to the right path.. I cry so much and just don't know what to do.. God has blessed me and I've made this mistake.. what is hurting me a lot is that I am about to hurt someone very special to me because I know I have to break it off..
When we were friends, we developed a great bond and have been through a lot. We've helped each other through lots of downs. It didn't matter to me what religion he was, I was still there for him as a friend and treated him like any other fellow human being. I find peace when helping others. After a while, I realised that I started to develop feelings for him, for who he was. It was not a physical thing. I care a lot about him and just want him to be happy. He is a very sweet human being who has always helped others, putting them before himself. He's bipolar and has a very difficult time at home (his parents pretty much tell him he's worthless every day of his life). He has been taken advantage of so many times by those closest to him and had been betrayed by someone he loved. Because of these things, and because I trusted him so much, I wanted him to know that there is someone out there that loves him.. I just wanted to make things better. I told him that I loved him, that it didn't matter to me if he didn't feel the same, and that I just wanted him to be happy. I hadn't any idea about what I was going to get into by saying this, but I just wanted to tell him the truth that I had kept from him for a long time. He confessed to me that he did indeed feel the same, and about how much he talked about me to his friends, and how I have always been good to him. I just want you guys to understand that it's straight from the heart..
There is no intimacy or anything like that, we talk to each other like friends and crack jokes sometimes just like other people do. He treats me well and is everything I look for..
I'm just so lost... we can't be together because he doesn't believe.. I'm afraid that if I tell him it's because of my religion it will drive him further from it in terms of respect because it'll hurt him. He was already betrayed by a girl who went for someone else and left him broken, and now he's going to be hurt again..
It's all my fault.. I just couldn't hide my feelings. I wish he would believe, but no one should have to convert for someone else.. belief has to come from the heart, from your own convictions. This is the reason why I think it's best to let him go, to save the pain in the future in having to adjust to different ideals. I honestly believe it would be best for him.
What I'm struggling with his how I can do this.. how can I tell him? I just don't know what to do.. I know it's going to be painful but I have to do it. I'm just not sure how I can approach him about it. If anything, what else can be done? Thanks so much for reading, and if someone could share with me their point of view.