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  1. #1
    Striving4Deen Lateafha's Avatar
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    Have you ever been scared of making BIG decisions?

    Salam all

    Like getting married, or accepting a proposal, or raising children one day, Educating yourself, Making your parents happy, making your self happy,

    It all has so much RESPONSIBILTY, How does one know that it's a road to HAPPINESS and not a road to MISSERY?

    I am honestly SCARED of making BIG decisions. I know that No one can make any decisions for me. I always tell myself whatever ALLAH plans will happen, but that does not mean that I have to sit around and just wait for answers falling from the sky, but then again if I do make decisions i'm scared that I eventually rushed and that I made the wrong ones and that they'll haunt me for the rest of my life.

    has anyone been in this sort of situation before, I WISH if I didn't have to make ANY decisions at all. How will you know that the decisions you make in your life are the right ones?
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  2. #2
    Odan Justcurious's Avatar
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    No, not ever. The sheer thought of being scared when making a big decision frightens me!
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  3. #3
    Odan Ayah's Avatar
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    Yeah, it is scary to make big decisions in life. But that's why we have Allah to guide us. Before we do anything, we should ask ourselves if Allah would be pleased if we did "so-and-so." That's also why we have "istikhaarah." Whenever you're uncertain about something, make istikhaarah, and insha Allah, Allah will show you the path you should follow, whether it's through a dream or just this gut feeling you might have as a result of making the supplication and praying.

    May Allah guide us always.

    ~Ayah
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  4. #4
    Jaserah
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    well, i always start by asking myself, what is the worst that could happen? then it doesn't seem so bad at all, and actually is calming. so if the outcome could ultimately be very bad, or very good, weigh one against the other. sometimes it helps to write stuff down. write on the top of a paper your decision, then make a list of pros and cons in two separate columns on the paper. after you have written everything you can think of, in the pros and cons, then sit and look at your list, think about it long and hard. and inshAllah, the thing you were so scared about will seem so little compared to the good that could come out of your decision or vice versa. ultimatley of course, it is all in Allah's hands. but these are just some things i do that clear my mind. dunno if it helps. and take your time also, don't rush into any big decisions, make sure that you don't feel like you are doing something in haste, Allah says to be patient, so take your time in decision making. (just some advice from cheeks)

  5. #5
    ... nam's Avatar
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    Sallaam

    I make big desicions about every 2 hours cuz i make a big choice then i change the big choice with another one . Seriously though, the worst that could happen is death, so if it results in you being alive then it cannot be bad. Just believe and take a risk

    ALlah Hafiz

    CNam ("Talking to the book" Nam 13/11/03)
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  6. #6
    Senior Member U_wott's Avatar
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    I'm a stockbroker

    i make u bankrupt if i want

  7. #7
    Member Rosie's Avatar
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    I AM SCARED OF MAKING THE DECISION TO MARRY. I HAVE FOUND THE RIGHT PERSON .. THATS WHAT I THINK . BUT HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW IF THAT IS THE RIGHT PERSON???

    CAN SOME1PLEASE HELP ME.. I NEED ADVICE ON HOW I CAN FIND OUT IF HE IS RIGHT FOR ME.
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  8. #8
    Striving4Deen Lateafha's Avatar
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    I started making decisions alhamdulilah, and everything seems to be going alright so far. , not as bad as I thought it would be, I still have alot of un-answered questions though but InshaAllah i'll take one step at a time.

    just wanted to say THANK YOU for all the ADVICE & WISDOM!

    I don't usually come around here to look for advice, the day I posted that thread, I was feeling very confused and my head was spinning so fast. I never expected all of these wonderful advices i had in return MashaAllah.

    Thanks Ayah , nam , Jaseerah,
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  9. #9
    ~all growed up~ StickyPeas's Avatar
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    alhamdulilah i can make big decisions fairly easily and quickly.. just gona be rational most of the time.. they turn out good, alhamdulilah!

    not so much scared of makin the decision, but scared of whether it'l affect my family in a bad way... but inshallah always trust Allah.. trust Allah wen it comes to deciding and trust Allah with the outcome, wateva it is, good or bad.. Always always remember Allah... focus on ur objective in life, pleasing Allah, and inshallah u'l be sorted!


  10. #10
    Striving4Deen Lateafha's Avatar
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    Originally posted by StickyPeas
    alhamdulilah i can make big decisions fairly easily and quickly.. just gona be rational most of the time.. they turn out good, alhamdulilah!

    not so much scared of makin the decision, but scared of whether it'l affect my family in a bad way... but inshallah always trust Allah.. trust Allah wen it comes to deciding and trust Allah with the outcome, wateva it is, good or bad.. Always always remember Allah... focus on ur objective in life, pleasing Allah, and inshallah u'l be sorted!

    MashaAllah true SP. that was well said sis. Thanks sis I appreciate that.

    Trusting Allah is the key all the way. I think making desicions also means growing up and not having mom and dad deciding things for you, that bit is alittle scarry to me. My parents are travelling at the moment, and I realize everyday more and more how much they mean to me.

    May Allah never take our parents away from us ameen.
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  11. #11
    Odan
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    Never scared to make decisions. I better not be. Since some of my family relay on me.

    I am very practical by nature. So, as the things comes up, i go from there.

    Actually, i am never scare of anything.

    I was very scare flying in air plane. But after few flights i got over. Now i can even like to learn to fly one. Not that i am gone to, nor i be able to. Bot if i could, i sure would have like it to lears and flying one.

  12. #12
    Member CatcherInTheRye's Avatar
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    It is hard making decissions,especially when they involve changing your life in such a big way.The most important thing is dont rush into it,take your time,chill out, ask Allah to show you what is the right decission for you.He in his infinite wisdom knows what is the best thing for you so ask him,and put your trust in him.Also it might help to get some advice from someone who you can trust, a close freind or someone, or someone who has been through a similar thing.talk to as many ppl as you can,ppl who you can trust,ppl who have experience of whatever your decission involves,than take it from there.

    I hope it works out 4 you
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