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  1. #1
    Odan Sister Z's Avatar
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    bigring You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    you know you're a muslim when

    1.Your parents constantly worry that you are “forgetting your heritage.”

    2.You have an endless supply of dates, prayer beads, and prayer rugs

    3.Your family thinks they are modern, but they ask the local sheikh for advice when there are problems in the family.

    4.You arrive one or two hours late to an event and think it’s normal.

    5.You talk for an hour at the front door when leaving someone’s house.

    6.When your parents meet strangers and talk for a few minutes, you discover you’re talking to a distant cousin.

    7.Your mother has a minor disagreement with her (or your dad’s) sister and doesn’t talk to her for ten years.

    8.Your parents want every detail from you about where you’re going before you leave the house.

    9.You have a curfew no matter how old you are.

    10.You minimize your MSN conversation when a family member walks past.

    11.Your mother does everything for you if you are male.

    12.Your brothers or father will never let you take your car for an oil change if you are a female.

    13.Your parents say you’re becoming Americanized anytime you get into trouble.

    14.You can spot a Muslim a mile away, and they spot you too—you can tell from the way the keep turning around and staring.

    15.No one ever seems to call ahead of time to say they are coming over for a visit.

    16.Your relatives alone could populate a small city.

    17.Everyone is a family friend.

    18.Your middle name is your father’s first name.

    19.You have a difficult Arabic name so you come up with a cheesy Westernized version of it like “Sam,” “Mike,” or “Fred.”

    20.You have fifteen cousins named Mohammed.

    21.You went to a university as far away from home as possible.

    22.You still came back home to live with your parents after graduating.

    23.You know no one who has studied music.

    23.If you are a female in college, you are studying to be a teacher or doctor. If you are a male, you are studying engineering or business. If you deviate from either these careers, your family prays that you “come back to the right track.”

    24.You know someone who got married at the age of 16.

    25.Your parents are panicking if you aren’t married when you turn 25.

    26.You propose marriage for someone, and you are asked:
    do you have a green card?
    how much money do you earn?
    what village in your home country do you come from?

    27.The highlight of the social scene is either a wedding or a funeral.

    28.Your parents push the concept of an arranged marriage on you and try and demonstrate how well it works whenever they’re not fighting.

    29.You like the meat well done.

    30.You teach Westerners swear words in your own language.

    31.You are with a Muslim colleague and people ask: “Is that your wife?”

    32.You avoid public places when with a member of the opposite sex, especially if there is an acquaintance within a 250 miles radius.

    33.You order food at your ethnic restaurant in your own language to impress the American people you’re with, but the waiters don’t understand you.

    34.You get really excited and call the whole family into the living room when there is a special on Muslims on TV.

    35.You always get randomly frisked at the airport.

    36.You get up from your seat on the airplane to use the restroom, and the guys seated next to you get that really worried look on their faces.

    37.You walk out of customs with your trolley at the airport and you see all twenty-five members of your family who have come to pick you up.

    38.You go back to your parents’ country and people treat you like a member of…the royal family.

    39.You have cousins you have never met, whose names you don’t know, but who insist they’re related to you, even though they bear no resemblance to anyone YOU know.

    40.There’s one person in you family whom you are not allowed to talk about, because they did something “wrong.”

    41.You call everyone older than you uncle or aunt, even if you have never met him or her before.

    42.You read the Qur’an before taking on any major task, like exams, or asking the boss for a raise.

    43.You meet someone of another religion who is a genuinely good person, and you think to yourself, “If only he/she became a Muslim…”

    44.You notice that whenever you go to another Muslim’s house, your parents always talk about religion and politics.

    45.Every few months, your parents say they’re moving back to the home country.

    46. You order a Fillet 'O Fish at McDonald's

    47.You hug and kiss people you have never seen before in your life.

    48.You have a bottle filled with water next to the toilet.

    49.You know all of the Arabic swear words, but none of the conversational mechanics.

    50. Your mother has a cute name for you that you would hate for your friends to hear, yet she calls you that name when you have company

    51. You talk on your cell-phone more than you talk face-to-face

    52. When your parents meet strangers they always ask them which country they come from.

    53. Your mother cannot have company over without cooking a banquet

    54. You hug people you hate after the Eid prayer.

    55. You visit a Muslim land and everybody thinks you are rich

    56.Your mother's house is more than 200 degrees and she keeps saying how cold it is.

  2. #2
    Umm Sulaim JDR's Avatar
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    Don’t want to be rude sister,but this got nothing to do with being muslim and I think its insulting your own deen( I know you probably don’t mean it and see it this way)

    Better change it to: you know your Jahil when....
    Or you know you not raised in a deeni household when.....
    They want to extinguish Allah's Light with their mouths, but Allah will not allow except that His Light should be perfected even though the disbelievers hate (it).)- It is He Who has sent His Messenger with guidance and the religion of truth, to make it superior over all religions even though the idolators hate (it).) Surah Al-Tawbah 32-33

  3. #3
    الحمد لله‎
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    it's too long, just skimread some, didn't find anything funny
    "We have a a history to be proud of and a future to believe in.."

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  4. #4
    ~ Allahu Akbar ~ dhak1yya's Avatar
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    almost none of it applies to me as I'm a revert.......

    I think "you know you were raised in an Arab Muslim household in a western country if...." would be a better title.....





  5. #5
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    I think this is just the You Know You're Asian When.. with a few extra things added in to make it sound like it's about muslims because most of it sounds like I've read it somewhere before.

  6. #6
    Agent of Chaos Wolfn's Avatar
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    I think this should be titled "You know you're an Arab when...."
    Dreams feel real while we're in them. It's only when we wake up do we realize something was actually strange.

  7. #7
    Library Ice Queen Massilia's Avatar
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    Lol i think it is more Arab culture than Islam.

    Especially for the 55 point
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  8. #8
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    I'm sorry but I find your thread troubling for a few reasons to say the least:

    1st. The characteristics you are pointing to are cultural, not religious, and should be kept to those subjects.

    2nd. The muslim follows Islam which is Universal and supersedes all culture.

    3rd. The actions of all muslims should be to aspire to act as the Prophet (PBUH) has acted, and such a noble pursuit should not be a subject of humour.

    As others have mentioned, I believe you should rename your thread.

    Sorry to sound dry and harsh but I think many Muslims would genuinely be offended by your post (even if you mean well)

  9. #9
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    I'm not offended. Great post. So many of those are true, maybe cause I'm arab but I'm sure other people from other muslim countries could relate to this.

  10. #10
    Just a guy : ) Islamisthebest's Avatar
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    Hmm some of it was funny but not all.

    Number 11. Mums do everything if your a male.

    Well I am a male, and my mum USED to do everything when i was younger but not any more.

    That is just generalisation.
    Ask Allah for everything, even if it is only a shoe-lace, beacuse if Allah does not make it easy, then it will not be possible

  11. #11
    Odan ImperfectBeauty's Avatar
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    This has nothing to do with being a Muslim. It was a list about you know when your a pakistani

    Some of the things on there are pathetic ...lol

  12. #12
    الإسلام هو الحياة sis_on_sunnah's Avatar
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    hmm none of that applies to me apart from the one where it said soemthing like you meet a nice non muslim and wish if only they were muslim

    Most of the things listed on here must be culture cus i cant relate to it, but some of the stuff i found pretty funny and cant believe people do that..
    http://www.deenulhuq.wordpress.com

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  13. #13
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    I read this stuff but it was titled.. "You know Asian if..." ..
    most of its not even funny or true

  14. #14
    A work in progress ajnabee's Avatar
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    u know ur a muslim when u pronounce muhammadur rasulullah!
    Last edited by ajnabee; 17-01-10 at 04:31 PM.
    "For those who realise that everything is from Allah, everything is the same."
    ~ Jalaluddin al-Rumi


  15. #15
    Very happy bunny -:) KeeKee's Avatar
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    none of this has anything to do with being a Muslim :eek3:
    this kind of stuff gets on my nerves. its just a list of generalizations.
    The enforcement of Muslim Brotherhood is the greatest social ideal of Islam. On it was based the Prophet's (SAW) sermon on his last pilgrimage, and Islam cannot be completely realized until this ideal is achieved. '
    (Shaikh Maulana Muhammad Yusuf)
    In Lam Takun Ghaadiban Annee Falaa Ubaalee...

  16. #16
    Senior Member poppy22's Avatar
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    Stop giving the sister a bad time. She posted it to for humour purposes..stop taking it so seriously.

  17. #17
    ~ Allahu Akbar ~ dhak1yya's Avatar
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    I don't think anyone is giving her a hard time...... just suggesting the title should be changed.





  18. #18
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    I can't believe what I am reading here

    I am very offended by this list and so should everyone, there is nothing humourous about it at all. Being a muslim is the most honourable, revered and beautiful way to live - I am eternally gratefull for being born as one and to live as one. No muslim should poke fun at it. If anyone pokes fun at my deen albeit in a humourous way I am sorry but I will not stand back and hold my tongue.

    How dare this sister z think it funny that I and many other muslims have an endless supply of dates and islamic beads in my house. Alhamdulillah a house without dates is one without food if I remember a hadith correctly. By making fun of this point you are making fun of our Prophets (pbuh) hadith - Astagfirullah

    and if I have a bottle full of water next to the toilet it is because I practise cleanliness and purity so why is this funny?

    If you want to be humourous and have a laugh then go read about the punishment of the grave - that will wipe the smile off your face

  19. #19
    Odan layla tul qadr's Avatar
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    but "Muslim" is someone that follows the deen , those things sound like humorous stereotypes that would a apply to a culture not a religion?
    I'm not offended because i understand your train of thought and I think that you obviously honour islam as I am assuming that you are muslim.
    “Curiosity is the very basis of education and if you tell me that curiosity killed the cat, I say only the cat died nobly.”

  20. #20
    Senior Member neelu's Avatar
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    I don't think it's offensive but I agree some of these points are cultural (more applicable to a "you know when you're Arab/Asian" thread) rather than religious. My favourite point though was no. 28 cos' my parents do this:

    28.Your parents push the concept of an arranged marriage on you and try and demonstrate how well it works whenever they’re not fighting.

    Hehehehe

  21. #21
    craz'rthanacritternasack! Deen commited's Avatar
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    None of this applies to me either cause I am a convert as well
    but I don't find this offensive at all I think a lot of Muslims
    take a mound and turn it into a hill goodness
    Last edited by Deen commited; 17-01-10 at 11:03 PM.
    “Man is the only critter who feels the need to label things as flowers or weeds.”




  22. #22
    BaharMeansSpring Bahar's Avatar
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    This is funny.. More like You know you are a Middle Eastern when...
    Ex Oriente Lux

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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    I think the OP has mixed up cultural things with Islam, but some of the points were very funny.

    You should at least see some of the funny side.

  24. #24
    Senior Member SilverCrescent's Avatar
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    Quote Originally Posted by neelu View Post
    I don't think it's offensive but I agree some of these points are cultural (more applicable to a "you know when you're Arab/Asian" thread) rather than religious.
    Yes. Just type "You know you're an Indian/Arab " on Google and pages having the same points come up .

  25. #25

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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    Quote Originally Posted by lailaamin View Post
    I can't believe what I am reading here

    I am very offended by this list and so should everyone, there is nothing humourous about it at all. Being a muslim is the most honourable, revered and beautiful way to live - I am eternally gratefull for being born as one and to live as one. No muslim should poke fun at it. If anyone pokes fun at my deen albeit in a humourous way I am sorry but I will not stand back and hold my tongue.

    How dare this sister z think it funny that I and many other muslims have an endless supply of dates and islamic beads in my house. Alhamdulillah a house without dates is one without food if I remember a hadith correctly. By making fun of this point you are making fun of our Prophets (pbuh) hadith - Astagfirullah

    and if I have a bottle full of water next to the toilet it is because I practise cleanliness and purity so why is this funny?

    If you want to be humourous and have a laugh then go read about the punishment of the grave - that will wipe the smile off your face
    Hello Lailaamin,

    Is a sense of humor forbidden in Islam?

    I thought the thread was cute. I didn't think it made fun of Muslims or one's culture at all. Granted, it is more about culture than Islam, but still there is no harm done.

    There are many things in the list that are sweet, that is different from my culture, for example, staying a long time talking saying goodbye. In my culture, you just rush out the door saying bye, maybe giving a quick hug to your Mom first (at least I do) so you can get to where your'e supposed to be on time, so I think it's great that in this person's culture, they stay and talk instead of just rushing around all the time. That's cool.

    Why so offended? Just curious. It is nothing bad against being a Muslim, at least I didn't notice any negative slant against Muslims in it. ?

    Peace and God bless.

  26. #26

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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    Quote Originally Posted by Deen commited View Post
    None of this applies to me either cause I am a convert as well
    but I don't find this offensive at all I think a lot of Muslims
    take a mound and turn it into a hill goodness
    Hi Deen Committed,

    Yeah I don't get the big deal. And yeah it's cultural, but there's nothing in the original thread that gave me a negative impression of Muslims... ? I thought lots of the points were sweet and good, like parents wanting to know where their children are going and the love for one's home country and the sense of strong family connections...

    True humor,I think, is seeing life in a fun way.

    Peace and God bless you.
    Last edited by Christianlady; 18-01-10 at 07:01 PM.

  27. #27
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    Quote Originally Posted by Wolfn View Post
    I think this should be titled "You know you're an Arab when...."
    Yes this is exactly what I was thinking. It is more a list for "You know your married to an Arab when..."
    And i am not being rude to Arabs;. I can say this cos I am married to one.. lol

  28. #28
    Agent of Chaos Wolfn's Avatar
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    Quote Originally Posted by lailaamin View Post
    I can't believe what I am reading here

    I am very offended by this list and so should everyone, there is nothing humourous about it at all. Being a muslim is the most honourable, revered and beautiful way to live - I am eternally gratefull for being born as one and to live as one. No muslim should poke fun at it. If anyone pokes fun at my deen albeit in a humourous way I am sorry but I will not stand back and hold my tongue.

    How dare this sister z think it funny that I and many other muslims have an endless supply of dates and islamic beads in my house. Alhamdulillah a house without dates is one without food if I remember a hadith correctly. By making fun of this point you are making fun of our Prophets (pbuh) hadith - Astagfirullah

    and if I have a bottle full of water next to the toilet it is because I practise cleanliness and purity so why is this funny?

    If you want to be humourous and have a laugh then go read about the punishment of the grave - that will wipe the smile off your face




    Are you one of those Muslims that believe laughing is haraam? Seriously, you sound a little extremist.
    Dreams feel real while we're in them. It's only when we wake up do we realize something was actually strange.

  29. #29
    Ima Sheeester BumbleBee's Avatar
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    Calm down people. The title of this thread should be 'asian' not muslim, i read it somewhere ages ago, plus it would make a lot more sense. I think it's funny.

  30. #30
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    2. You have an endless supply of dates, prayer beads, and prayer rugs.

    23.You know no one who has studied music.

    25.Your parents are panicking if you aren’t married when you turn 25.

    29.You like the meat well done.

    34.You get really excited and call the whole family into the living room when there is a special on Muslims on TV.

    36.You get up from your seat on the airplane to use the restroom, and the guys seated next to you get that really worried look on their faces.

    37.You walk out of customs with your trolley at the airport and you see all twenty-five members of your family who have come to pick you up.

    43.You meet someone of another religion who is a genuinely good person, and you think to yourself, “If only he/she became a Muslim…”

    46. You order a Fillet 'O Fish at McDonald's

    47.You hug and kiss people you have never seen before in your life.

    48.You have a bottle filled with water next to the toilet.

    53. Your mother cannot have company over without cooking a banquet

    56.Your mother's house is more than 200 degrees and she keeps saying how cold it is.
    It's so true .

  31. #31
    Odan ImperfectBeauty's Avatar
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    The title of the thread should be "asian" instead of Muslim, should've change the title

  32. #32
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    i think this about arabs or asian
    not muslims in genral who are born in the west

    but this is funny because alot of my arab friends have these parental issues
    Last edited by disneydiva21; 23-01-10 at 06:18 AM.

  33. #33
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    Re: You know you're a muslim when.....(humour)

    oops double post


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