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  1. #1
    Umm Amirah *hijab*'s Avatar
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    Shaking a mans hand

    what wud you do in this situation?:

    u go for an interview, and the person interviewing you is a man, and he wants to shake you hand

    uh oh, obviously u dnt wna shke it, and u dnt, but how cn u be polite about it?

    its likely they wnt give u the job then, becuse it usually comes across as rude

    any tips/advice?

    anyone experienced this...as im dreading it!

  2. #81
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    Re: Shaking a mans hand

    man i was in a dodgy position today..

    I was doing really well at work,my manager was over the moon as i was hitting targets and she was really pleased and randomly for the first time ever she put her hands out wanting me to shake it, i was uh oh and just had to tell her straight, eeh i can't shake your hands because of my religion doesnt permit me to do so, i just hope she didnt take any offence, but if i keep doing my job well then what difference would it make, she'd be happy the stores hitting her targets right

  3. #82
    Umm Amirah *hijab*'s Avatar
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    Re: Shaking a mans hand

    Quote Originally Posted by Daaal View Post
    man i was in a dodgy position today..

    I was doing really well at work,my manager was over the moon as i was hitting targets and she was really pleased and randomly for the first time ever she put her hands out wanting me to shake it, i was uh oh and just had to tell her straight, eeh i can't shake your hands because of my religion doesnt permit me to do so, i just hope she didnt take any offence, but if i keep doing my job well then what difference would it make, she'd be happy the stores hitting her targets right
    oo thts a tough one, especially wen thyre all happy with you

    dnt worry as long as u do ure job right and as long as she didnt take offence to it

  4. #83
    Umm Amirah *hijab*'s Avatar
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    Re: Shaking a mans hand

    Quote Originally Posted by Hafsah View Post
    on my graduation i emailed student services/the people who sent the graduation details..explaining that i wouldnt be able to shake hands and if they could inform the certficate dude person...

    got an email back a few hours later saying they are completely aware and are sensitive to this issue, and if i dont want to shake hands...all i needed to do was hold onto the event booklet to let the chancellor dude know

    and on the day of the graduation..the ushers went around reminding everyone what to do if they didnt want to shake hands
    just sent them an email...have to wait for reply now...mmm i wonder what theyre gna say!

    at the end of the day they cnt force us to shke their hands...lol

  5. #84
    blah Hafsah's Avatar
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    Re: Shaking a mans hand

    most unis are used to this...so shouldnt be a problem inshaAllaah

  6. #85
    Umm Amirah *hijab*'s Avatar
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    Re: Shaking a mans hand

    Quote Originally Posted by Hafsah View Post
    most unis are used to this...so shouldnt be a problem inshaAllaah
    yeah inshallah...i wonder how many emails they get regarding this issue lol

  7. #86
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    Re: Shaking a mans hand

    *hijab* I dunno if I've replied yet but I think that at most uni's that is standard operating procedure. You are told to hold the programme or whatever it is in a certain way, so that the person intending to shake your hand knows not to. It was same at my sisters uni
    It is narrated on the authority of Jabir that he heard the (Holy Prophet)[] say: A Muslim is he from whose hand and tongue the Muslims are safe.
    -Muslim




  8. #87
    Umm Amirah *hijab*'s Avatar
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    Re: Shaking a mans hand

    Quote Originally Posted by Hiking View Post
    *hijab* I dunno if I've replied yet but I think that at most uni's that is standard operating procedure. You are told to hold the programme or whatever it is in a certain way, so that the person intending to shake your hand knows not to. It was same at my sisters uni
    yeh it probably is, but i dnt know about my uni and i havnt chatted to other sisters bout it (past years), so i dunno, but alhumdulilah at least ill know for sure inshallah if they email me bak

    jazakallahkhair sisters!

  9. #88
    Power of the Assassin
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    Re: Shaking a mans hand

    Quote Originally Posted by Abu Suleiman View Post
    someones gonna tag this thread "belal hates iranians" lol

    akhee u are becoming quite popular in the world of thread tagging...


    Love the picture on your avtar

  10. #89
    Umm Amirah *hijab*'s Avatar
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    Re: Shaking a mans hand

    Quote Originally Posted by Hafsah View Post
    most unis are used to this...so shouldnt be a problem inshaAllaah
    alhumdulilah, got a reply frm ceremony person

    she sed its not an unusual situation, so all the people tht dont want to do it have to contact her so she cn make arrangements

    Jzk sooo much i really appreciate it sis!

  11. #90
    Ibn al-Yaman
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    Re: Shaking a mans hand

    alhamdulillah. please inform other sisters about this ^^

    Quote Originally Posted by truepath View Post
    Not washing hands really puts me off... some muslims mite not do but MOST non muslims.. dont... they pi$$ and just leave without even washin hands with water... then they come to shake hand with u... offer u somethin to eat... i really get frustrated at work place by this... hence I avoid everythin they offer *sigh*
    i understand your frustration. I have the same problem too.

    I would advise you not to touch the door handle in the toilet! (for obvious reasons). Just hold some tissue and then throw it away after opening the door. This way your hands will stay clean.
    KNOW ALLAH KNOW PEACE
    NO ALLAH NO PEACE

  12. #91
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    Re: Shaking a mans hand

    the tags on this thread is sadistically anti-belal
    There's nothing natural about natural disasters. Think about it...

  13. #92
    Umm Amirah *hijab*'s Avatar
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    Re: Shaking a mans hand

    [QUOTE=MWarrior;2826199]alhamdulillah. please inform other sisters about this ^^ [QUOTE]

    yeh mashallah i txt my m8s about it...see wot happens

  14. #93
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    Re: Shaking a mans hand

    I have no problems shaking hands with a non muslim.
    But I always have to think twice if I have to shake hand with a muslim.

  15. #94
    Umm Amirah *hijab*'s Avatar
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    Re: Shaking a mans hand

    Quote Originally Posted by Faatje View Post
    I have no problems shaking hands with a non muslim.
    But I always have to think twice if I have to shake hand with a muslim.
    we are not allowed to shake any non- mahram geezers hand- muslim or non muslim

    coz were precious

  16. #95
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    Re: Shaking a mans hand

    besides our good looks

    I don't know if you guys know about the imam in NL who refused to shake hands with the minister of Immigration and Integration ( female), while 40 other imams did shake her hand. Since this issue especially employers expect you to shake hands with applicants.

    Anyway, it was never an issue for me to shake hands with non muslims. But when I expect a muslim, I'm never sure if this person will appreciate it.

  17. #96
    http://www.hearthijab.com Phoenix CG's Avatar
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    Re: Shaking a mans hand

    when i don't shake hands I purposely dominate the discussion, that way they can't question you, and respect your superiority, in terms of the subject matter.

  18. #97
    Morris
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    Re: Shaking a mans hand

    Quote Originally Posted by Faatje View Post
    besides our good looks

    I don't know if you guys know about the imam in NL who refused to shake hands with the minister of Immigration and Integration ( female), while 40 other imams did shake her hand. Since this issue especially employers expect you to shake hands with applicants.

    Anyway, it was never an issue for me to shake hands with non muslims. But when I expect a muslim, I'm never sure if this person will appreciate it.
    I am sure only an idiot would be offended - if- it is explained. Not taking an offered hand is considered rather obnoxious over here. I am sure it would be best for people just to tell them why - that there's no problem but I do not shake hands as my religion forbids it.

  19. #98
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    Re: Shaking a mans hand

    @Morris

    The imam tried to explain to the Minister why he wouldn't shake hands. But she was the kind of person who wont take no for an answer. At the end of this matter the imam was send back to where he came from due 'possible terroristictreat & attacks '

  20. #99

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    Re: Shaking a mans hand

    Quote Originally Posted by umm turaab View Post
    This happend to me like 2 weeks ago, i was like im soooooooooo not gonna shake the man's hand, i'l just explain to him that i dont due to my religiou belief and i was proper getting myself ready for it but wen he put his hand in front of me, my hand AUTOMATICALLY shot up to shake his hand....i was like screaming n crying in my head saying NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! Then after the interview i realised i didn't want to be in such an occupation where day to day there'e gonna be men around me and where even BEFORE ive been hired im compromising my Deen.
    dw i bet you got rejected anyway

  21. #100
    enchanted_rose
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    Re: Shaking a mans hand

    I donít think you should feel shy or compelled to shake someoneís hand, its your choice.

    If I come across a male who wants to shake my hand I simply state that I am a Muslim and that in Islam we are not permitted to shake hands with someone of the opposite sex who is not related to us.

    Sometimes they understand and admire me for it and sometimes It creates a bit of an awkward atmosphere. But at the end of the day it doesnít really matter to me as Iím adhering to my faith.

    The best trick to avoid shaking hands with someone is as soon as they tell you their name, introduce yourself, put your hands together, and to place them close to your heart-ish area and say nice to meet you.

    Its even better if you meet someone from an Asian background because you all you have to do is slightly tilt you head and say nice to meet you.

    Non-Muslim men (the older gentlemen) back in the day never really initiated the shaking of the hands with a women, they usually wait to see if your going to offer your hand and if you do they shake it, if not they leave you alone. Most of the younger men of our generation however, are very touchy and they get a bit awkward if you tell them you can't shake hands with them but they do understand.

  22. #101
    Umm Amirah *hijab*'s Avatar
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    Re: Shaking a mans hand

    ^^^

    yep thts the best thing to do i understand, just explain it...and cnt do anything about their reaction

    once this man put his hand out to shake, my initial reaction ws i just waved at him, and he kinda put his thumb up to me- he knew- ws funny though


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