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In the Heart of a Green Bird in Paradise Insha'Allah
Imam ash-Shafi'i on his death bed
Al-Muzni who is Abu lbrahim Isma`il ibn Yahya said:
"I entered upon ash-Shafi'i during his illness which resulted in his death, so I said to him: 'What is your condition?' He replied: "I am journeying from this world, and departing from my brothers, drinking from the cup of death, and upon Allaah - Exalted is His remembrance - arriving. And no! By Allaah, I do not know if my soul is travelling towards Paradise or the Fire!"
Then he started to weep, and he said:
'In You, the Creator, I raise my longing, And even if I am, O possessor of kindness and generosity, an evildoer, a criminal,
When my heart became constricted and my paths became narrow,
I took my hope in Your pardon and forgiveness as an opening and an escape,
My sins seemed very great to me but when I compared them to Your forgiveness,
I found Your forgiveness to be greater,
You are and still remain the only One who can forgive sins,
You grant and forgive out of Your benevolence and generosity,
Perhaps the One who is the source of all goodness will forgive and overlook my mistakes,
And will hide the sins and burden that I accumulated,
My sins seemed very great to me, so I turned (to You) in humility,
Were it not for my contentment in you, I wouldn't, O my Lord, have seen any comfort at all,
So if You forgive me, You would have forgiven a sinner, A rebellious, oppressive tyrant still sinning,
So my crime is very great, past and present, But Your forgiveness that embraces Your servant is greater and higher,
So whomsoever holds fast to Allaah is truly saved from mankind, And whomsoever's hopes are in Him, will be far removed from any regrets.'
I visited the Mausoleum where he is buried in Cairo a few months ago. It's such a shame the egyptian government make no effort to maintain this beautiful building where one of the greatest Imams is buried (may Allah have mercy on him), but they spend millions on maintaining pharaonic history. Shame on the Egyptian government.
Am currently after imam Shafi3's diwan in Arabic (Beruit copy) if anyone knows where I can order it from please let me know
Allahumma anta Rabbi la ilaha illa anta Khalaqtani wa ana'abduka, wa ana 'ala 'ahdika wa Wa'dika mastata'tu A'uidhubika min sharri ma sana'tu.' abu'u Laka bi ni 'matika wa'ala abu'u bidhanbi; faghfirli fa'innahu la yaghfiru-dh-dhunuba illa anta.
O Allah, You are my Lord, none has the right to be worshipped except You, You created me and I am Your servant and I abide to Your covenant and promise as best I can, I take refuge in You from the evil of which I have committed. I acknowledge Your favour upon me and I acknowledgemy sin, so forgive me, for verilynone can forgive sin except You.
You are not here just to fill space or to be a background character in someone else's movie. Consider this: nothing would be the same if you did not exist. Every place you have ever been and everyone you have ever spoken to would be different without you. We are all connected, and we are all affected by the decisions and even the existence of those around us.