A Video Game For The Christians

[Arifa]

Jesus Loves A Machine Gun / It's the new 'Left Behind' video game, where you maim and murder and hate, all in God's name. Praise!


Let's take a wild guess; the little bars indicate the various save-ability quotients of the various loser Armageddon survivors, and your job as a Tribulation Force militant Christian automaton is to kill everyone not willing to give their souls and brains over to the New Dogma. Note how the guy with the machine gun is the most holy of them all. It's so adorably degrading to true spirit, it can only make you giggle. Image courtesy of Left Behind Games Inc.

http://www.sfgate.com/g/pictures/2006/06/07/ga_morford_leftbehind02.jpg


Are you a true believer? Do you just know deep down in your black Wal-Mart socks that every word of the Bible is the absolute literal truth and nothing dare be doubted and anyone who thinks that God is merely an ambisexual omniblissful bloom of moist divine nondenominational honeydew melon should be strung up by their small intestine and beaten with sticks sharpened by Mel Gibson's teeth?

Do you feel, furthermore, that human cretins like, say, gays and Jews and Wiccans and all those hippie weirdos with their iPods and low-cut jeans and easy laughter are a plague upon this fine and holy land?


Do you think that contemptible books like "The Da Vinci Code" are not only blasphemy, but that you should probably go out into the street right now and behead a few lambs and perhaps mow down some Taoists with a Gatling gun just to deflect its horrible notions of the sacredness of the feminine divine? You do?

Praise Jesus! Your video game has arrived.

Behold, blessed children, the new and upcoming "Left Behind: Eternal Forces" video game, based on the freakishly best-selling series of apocalyptic trash-lit books. It's an ultraviolent, hilariously inept, wondrously accurate portrayal of what every true right-wing Christian fundamentalist really fantasizes about after they've had one too many pink wine spritzers and have logged a few hours in the gay chat rooms and have sufficiently indoctrinated their happily numb kids with tales of vile homos and scary "progressive" liberals who want to buy them candy and tattoo their sacrums and feed them organic hot dogs.

What's the game actually about? How do you play? I believe the pro-choice, pro-religion Talk to Action blog describes it best:

Imagine: you are a foot soldier in a paramilitary group whose purpose is to remake America as a Christian theocracy, and establish its worldly vision of the dominion of Christ over all aspects of life. You are issued high-tech military weaponry, and instructed to engage the infidel on the streets of New York City. You are on a mission -- both a religious mission and a military mission -- to convert or kill Catholics, Jews, Muslims, Buddhists, gays, and anyone who advocates the separation of church and state -- especially moderate, mainstream Christians. Your mission is "to conduct physical and spiritual warfare"; all who resist must be taken out with extreme prejudice.

Ah yes, the neo-Christian ideal. The ultimate dominionist police state, a smoking, reeking, post-apocalyptic vision of New York, a world teeming with nonbelievers just waiting to be either converted or massacred by nothing less than a Christianized American Taliban, a world of righteousness and judgment and death, all in the name of one very nasty and bloodthirsty God. It's "Grand Theft Auto" for the Rick Santorum set. It's "Resident Evil 4" for American Family Association types who eat too much BGH meat and never have sex.

Is it worth delineating all the appalling whorings of Christ's true message in this thing? Do you need to imagine the explosive reaction if, say, a powerful Muslim organization came out with a major video game where Islamic fundies killed hapless Christians with machine guns in order to restore the world to Allah? Or if the KKK or Aryan Nations created a game where you get to "cleanse" 'Merka of all the Jews and blacks so happy white people can stop being so scared of hip-hop? Verily, you do not.

But it is worth mentioning that, while the vast majority of sane Christians will recoil from this silly video game as violently as any sighing Wiccan, the bad news is the 10 "Left Behind" books -- a certified phenomenon, they -- have sold nearly as many copies as "The Da Vinci Code" (upward of 40 million worldwide) and their rabid fans are legion and dominionist demagogue megapastors like Rick Warren (whose megaministry is tacitly connected to the game) and famed hatemongering homophobes like James Dobson of the AMA are indoctrinating countless new and militant Christbots into their happy shiny armies of God every single day.

We can never forget: These are the people who still whisper into Dubya's ear when he's playing with his little green army men in the White House bathtub. They have stained the Supreme Court, attacked science and open discourse, made the human female nipple a symbol of shame and humiliation. Their power may be waning slightly as BushCo crumbles, but their agenda remains deeply sickening.

But hey, everyone needs a fantasy, right? Everyone needs an outlet for their violent daydreams, even fundamentalist right-wing bonk-jobs and their hapless 13-year-old male children, for whom (presumably) this game is designed. It's venomous bigotry made fun! More good news: The game should be ready just in time for Christmas.

Oh but wait. There's a lovely kicker: When you get bored with the sanctimonious drabness of fighting on the side of a hateful Christ (which, invariably, you most certainly will), the game apparently allows you to switch modes and fight for the army of the Antichrist, unleashing cloven-hoofed demons who feast on the flesh of the righteous as you blow away Bible-thumping soldiers who, just before they die, secretly confess their intense gay love for their platoon commanders. Isn't that thoughtful?

It's also a bit of genius marketing. After all, aren't the villains always far cooler and sexier than the self-righteous and the holy? The devil always has better vodka than God. Who wants to run around shooting Buddhists and praying, when you can don the armor of hell itself and drink and have dirtyfun sex and get tattoos and listen to Metallica and wear low-slung jeans and laugh easily? No one, that's who.

Which is why the game could become the sleeper hit of the year. Sure, brainwashed fundamentalist kids will love playing on the side of God. For a while. But then the dark side will beckon. The irresistible scent of rebellion will hit their noses like hot porn pizza. They will fall into the clutches of a crazy self-defined happiness, they will squirm and giggle and feel anarchic and seditious and free, running clean in a place where the beer is cold and the dancing is hot and no one is telling them they have to kill someone because that person dared to believe that God isn't, well, a misanthropic, murderous jackass.

Now that's heaven.

It should've had two players :rolleyes:, honest I don't mind :badguy: :p

[Arifa]

Just incase anyone misunderstands me; two players + battle mode :p

[Umar`]

the kuffar love to waste their time with these games
i saw some posters for 'americas most wanted' a while back
the zionists that produced it put Osamas face on the packaging and the posters but because hes such a handsome brother and his face has noor shining from it they completely messed with it, putting dark rings around his eyes and mouth etc. to make him look a bad guy:rolleyes:
Osamas roughing it afghanistan with just his phone and his ak,
bush has the best make up team money can buy and he still looks like a chimpanzee:)

[Arifa]

Now they attack :rolleyes:


Muslims craft their own video games

http://search.csmonitor.com/2006/0605/csmimg/p7a.gif
ROLE PLAY: A screenshot from 'Al-Quraysh,' a strategy game that tells the story of the first 100 years of Islam

Tired of Arabs and Muslims being portrayed as bad guys, a Syrian firm puts out a new line of games.

DAMASCUS, SYRIA – Inside the frosted glass doors of Afkar Media, located in Damascus's newly-built free-zone, software developers are trying to rebuild a civilization inside a video game. Set to be released in September, "Al-Quraysh" is a strategy game that tells the story of the first 100 years of Islam's history from the viewpoint of four different nations - Bedouins, Arabs, Persians, and Romans.

One can choose to command any of the armies of the four nations or lead the army of the main character, Khaled Ibn Waleed, a Muslim warrior who defeated the Roman and Persian empires and never lost a battle. Or one can play the role of the Bedouin sheikh, who must earn the respect of his tribe. The player has the task of building and protecting trade routes and water sources, building armies, conducting battles, and freeing slaves.

It's just one of several new games produced in the Middle East with the idea that video games, like other media, play a role in shaping young minds and impacting self-esteem. The makers hope "Al-Quraysh," named after the prophet Muhammad's tribe, will help to correct the image of Islam, alleviate tensions with the West, and stoke pride among young Muslims.

"Al-Quraysh is going to help people in the West better understand the people who are living in the East," says Radwan Kasmiya, an avid gamer and the executive manager of Afkar Media. "We want to show that this civilization was a sort of practical and almost heavenly civilization."

The game also holds lessons for Muslims, says Mr. Kasmiya.

"I get very embarrassed by the way we are showing our civilization," says Kasmiya. "There were rational laws that were governing Muslims at that time. This allowed this civilization to last for a long time and to accept the other civilizations that they came in touch with. It was not a conservative or sectarian civilization. But people have stopped taking the ideas behind the laws, and are taking the laws themselves. They do not understand the essence of the laws."

Afkar Media has already produced two games, both dealing with the plight of the Palestinian people. One game released last year, "Under Siege," was born out of frustration with the prevalance of Arabs and Muslims portrayed as terrorists in Western video games. The creators of the game say the story line counteracts the biases in some Western games by showing the Palestinian struggle from an Arab vantage point and creating Arab and Muslim characters who are fighting in self-defense.

In the first scene of "Under Siege," Baruch Goldstein, the Israeli settler who killed 27 worshipers in a Hebron mosque in 1994, snickers as he sneaks up to the mosque where two boys, Maen and Ahmed, are among those praying inside. Goldstein enters the mosque and starts shooting into the prostrated crowd.

As chaos ensues, Ahmed must disarm Goldstein and turn to fight Israeli soldiers. Killing civilians - Israeli or Arab - will make him lose his stamina. Maen is armed with a slingshot and must help the ambulance, which is being blocked by Israeli forces, reach the mosque.

Critics say the game merely inverts stereotypes - replacing extremist caricatures of Muslims with extremist caricatures of Jews, like that of Baruch Goldstein, and using the violent "shooter" format common to many video games.

But by giving young Muslims and Arabs the chance to see themselves in "the good guy" roles, Kasmiya hopes the games will bolster self-esteem among the region's children.

"Most video games on the market are anti-Arab and anti-Islam," says Kasmiya. "Arab gamers are playing games that attack their culture, their beliefs, and their way of life. The youth who are playing the foreign games are feeling guilt. On the outside they look like they don't care, but inside they do care. But we also don't want to do something about Arabs killing Westerners."

Both "Al-Quraysh" and "Under Siege," which cost roughly $100,000 to make, have been funded and released by Dar al-Fiqr, a publishing house that distributes a wide range of conservative to liberal voices on topics related to Islam. An estimated 100,000 copies of "Under Siege" have been distributed around the Arab world.

Hasan Salem, a director at Dar al-Fiqr, hopes "Al-Quraysh" will promote a more "modern" Islam.

"People believe that only their heritage will help this nation," says Mr. Salem. "We believe that this nation needs a new vision, new people, new blood to study, read, and then think about Islam. We believe in this line, not the old line that only reads old books and believes in the past."

But Dar al-Fiqr and Afkar Media's toughest challenge may be getting serious gamers to play.

Weak copyright laws in the region limit a company's ability to profit from such games, which sell for about $10 a copy.

And games like "Al-Quraysh" must compete with the sophisticated graphics and game plots of a multibillion-dollar gaming industry.

Mohamad Hamzeh, a 26-year-old gamer, says he bought "Under Siege," but that he would not play it instead of other popular games like "World of Warcraft" or "Counterstrike" because he says the plot lines are not convincing.

"We do want to put Arabs in games and show that we have a civilization, we respect other people, and that we are not aggressors," says Mr. Hamzeh, who develops video games himself. "But it's hard to really get into a game like 'Under Siege.' When you are in 2005 and you find a game that was released in 1995 that was much more advanced, it is not good. You must feel the challenge in the game. They are paying so much attention to the political and religious part, they are not concentrating on the technical parts of the game."


More on the game :www.quraishgame.com

[CheifJunior]

if i remember properly there was a palestinian game release, first person shooter. i cant remember the exact name but it was based on the current occupation in palestine where you a youth and the enemy is the israeli army, you start of with some stones and move your way up to guns through infiltration. I would love to get my hands on that game, if anyone has the slightest idea what im talking about and has the link to it plz assist.

[.: Rashid :.]

Sounds cool...

Is it for consoles or computers?

Same; if anyone knows where we can download these it'd be really appreciated.

-Rashid

[.: Rashid :.]

Ok, I found a demo (http://www.underash.net/english_demo/Undersiege_Demo_ver1.55.zip) for UnderSiege. Reuiquirements:

Operating System Windows XP (SP1)
Processor 1.8 GHz Intel Pentium IV processor or higher
Memory 512MB or higher
Video card 64 MB video card
HDD Space 1.3 GB free hard disk space plus space for saved games (additional space required for Windows swap-file)
CD ROM Speed x24
Soundcard DirectX 9.0c or higher compatible drivers
DirectX Version 9.0c or higher

Shame, I have Linux and can't be bothered to mess around with Wine (cos I just know it won't work)

Theres loads of information about it, and it got loads of press attention in the MIddle East, but I can't read Arabic :( (well, not without vowels, and I can't understand what I read)

-Rashid