The Dangers of Virtual Relationship

[Salman Al-Farsi]

Bismillah hir Rehman nir Rahim

The Dangers of Virtual Relationship


Surely, Satan is an enemy to you; So treat him as an enemy. He calls his followers only that they may become the inmates of the burning Fire. [Holy Quran 35:7]

Assalamu Alaikum Dear Muslim!

Insha Allah this email would find you in the best of imaan, Taqwa, health & peace of
Mind. Today I want to write something about the Dangers of “Virtual Relationship”.

There was a time when gf-bf relationship was not suppose to be a social problem in Muslim Societies [mostly due to the cultural influence] and Muslims used to proudly point out their fingers towards this Evil in the Western Society. But now, this evil has been diffused into so-called Muslim Societies.

So there is a need to educate our Muslim youth about this Evil and convince them to adhere to the Islamic moral values. Insha Allah Ameen.

What does it mean?

“Shaytan (Satan) threatens you with poverty and orders you to commit Fahisha (evil deeds, illegal sexual intercourse, sins etc.); whereas Allah promises you Forgiveness from Himself and Bounty, and Allah is All-Sufficient for His creatures' needs, All-Knower.” [Holy Quran 2:269]

In general there are many means of such immoral relations but today the most easiest and the most common way of this is via “Virtual Relationship”.

In simple Term “Virtual Relationship” means get to know & then involve in emotional relation with any stranger of opposite sex via Internet.”

It starts with “asl plz”, Hello-Hi, and getting to know each other via discussing decent matters. But unknowingly it become complicated and converts into an emotional relation which sometimes even lead to the sins.

The end of such relations leaves the marks of regret and mental upset which effect real life badly. People lost their purity, imaan and self respect and some times they really need proper counseling.

IS IT A REAL Problem ?

O ye who believe! Follow not the footsteps of Satan, and whoso follows the footsteps of satan should know that he, surely,enjoins indecency and manifest evil. And but for the grace of Allah and His mercy upon you, not one of you would ever be pure; but Allah purifies whom He pleases. And Allah is All-Hearing, All-Knowing. [Holy Quran 24:22]

On reading following life-stories you will understand that how such “Virtual Relationships” effect people’s real lives, irrespective of their marital status. [Single or Married]. In case of Married, it disturbs peace of whole family and sometimes end with divorce or a miserable married life.

Regrets & Guilt :

◊ He Awakened My Desires - feeling regret of past
◊ The guilt is real unlike the virtual relationship!
◊ When We Chat Online we fall into sins

Bothered & Confused:

◊ Bothered by the guilt of introducing a Muslim woman to a Muslim man I met on line and now they are dating
◊ Recently reverted to Islam and not sure about continuing a virtual relationship
◊ Can't stop myself from chatting with this man who likes me and proposed to me
◊ Virtual relationship has led to my having strong feelings for this man but I'm not sure how to involve dad
◊ Internet friend is confusing me about his feelings for me and maybe marriage

Heartaches:

◊ Internet friend wants to marry me but keep the marriage secret
◊ Internet friend ready to marry me but suddenly cut me out of his world
◊ Matrimonial internet site introduced us, we fell in love but he suddenly said no

Problems in Married life:

◊ Chatting online with another guy, fell in love, my husband is not very loving
◊ If Not My Husband… Can't He Be My Friend?
◊ Married but In Love with my Chat Friend
◊ Trying to repair a broken trust

Out of Control:

◊ Virtual Relation getting Out of My Hands - Me Confused
◊ Torn between the love of Allah and a virtual love
◊ Cyber relationship got out of control, he dropped me so I have lost respect in religion
◊ Mobile phone romance is all in his head
◊ SMS Messages Are Taking Me Too Far

Why it usually happen ?

Allah says in Quran : “O children of Adam, let not Shaytaan seduce you, even as he turned your parents out of the Garden, stripping them of their raiment that he might show them their nakedness. Truly, he sees you, he and his tribe, from where you see them not. Surely, We have made Satan friends of those who believe not.” [Holy Quran 7:28]

The major reason of such tragedies is our relax attitude towards Islamic Teachings regarding Non Mahrams.

They Consider Chatting as harmless and a mean to pass their leisure time. For them it’s an easy way to get to know others and making new friends and sharing ideas with them. That’s it not any serious relationship. Just NetPals.

But with the passage of time they get involve in serious friendship with some non Mahram. And finally the Shaytaan take control over them. That’s why they call it “The footsteps of Shaytaan”.

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “No man and woman are alone together, but the Shaytaan is the third one present.”

Insha Allah reading above stories, will enlighten many minds and they will avoid such “Virtual Relations” to save their imaan and peace in life. Ameen Ya Rabbil Aalameen.

Remember! “The wise is one who learn from others lives.”

How to Avoid such tragedies?

The Only way to avoid all such evils is to adhere to the Islamic teachings and then take protection of Allah by the Verses of Holy Quran & Supplications. By Nature WE human are weak. We can’t claim anything and we can`t save ourselves from the evils of Satan. Unless we get Allah’s protection.

And if an evil suggestion of Satan assail thee, then seek refuge in Allah; surely, He is All-Hearing, All-Knowing.[Holy Quran 7:201]

Today when everyone got Internet Connection at home so we should know the dangers of such “Virtual Relationships” & we should realize the importance of proper mental upbringing of our children and educate them about such matters.

May Allah protect us and our family from All kinds of evils of this Age. Ameen Ya Rabbil Aalameen.

Fi Amaan Allah
Muhammad S Faheem.

"Oh my Lord! Forgive my sins and my ignorance and my exceeding the limits (boundaries of righteousness) in all my deeds and what you know better than I. O Allah! Forgive my mistakes, those done intentionally or out of my ignorance or (without) or with seriousness, and I confess that all such mistakes are done by me. Oh Allah! Forgive my sins of the past and of the future which i did openly or secretly. You are the One who makes the things go before, and You are the One who delays them, and You are the Omnipotent."[Bukhari, vol., pp. 271, #407

[Salman Al-Farsi]

Found this in my mail box, and found it quiet very true and problem well outlined MashaAllah.

Though conclusion is a bit hm ... but a real warning.

[ur_yusra]

why dnt you agree with the conclusion..

jazakAllah khere for the warning..

I would ban my husband from the net..

[veilofmysoul]

jazakallahu khayr for that Akhi. Online relationships can't always be 100% genuine either, even if you think you know the person... you really don't. You protray yourself to be anything you want online, it's easy to trick people into an ideal image and try to show yourself with those qualities. I've met a few people from the internet and really it's different talking to them and the way they are offline then they are online.

There's the open source of martimonial sites and such and it's the same deal there, you can easily lie and people can easily fall for it. Shaytan is always there whispering and even online when a male and female are talking alone there's still the 3rd party presence of shaytan.

again, jazakallahu khayr for this thread.

[MalikOne™]

Online relationships can't always be 100% genuine either, even if you think you know the person... you really don't. You protray yourself to be anything you want online, it's easy to trick people into an ideal image and try to show yourself with those qualities. .

exactly :up: true most of the time.

I say most of the time because I know people for instance on this website who display the same characteristics offline as they do online.

[sawan]

marital relationship = good :up:
non- marital relationship = bad :(
virtual relationship = dumb @)

[Salman Al-Farsi]

jazakallahu khayr for that Akhi. Online relationships can't always be 100% genuine either, even if you think you know the person... you really don't. You protray yourself to be anything you want online, it's easy to trick people into an ideal image and try to show yourself with those qualities. I've met a few people from the internet and really it's different talking to them and the way they are offline then they are online.

There's the open source of martimonial sites and such and it's the same deal there, you can easily lie and people can easily fall for it. Shaytan is always there whispering and even online when a male and female are talking alone there's still the 3rd party presence of shaytan.

again, jazakallahu khayr for this thread.

precisely.

:up:

[Salman Al-Farsi]

why dnt you agree with the conclusion..

jazakAllah khere for the warning..

I would ban my husband from the net..

I agree with it, but I just thought alot more could have been said.

[bint]

Wallahi Salman that was a really open piece of Islamic yet straightforward email..im happy and content with this...and to all brthers and sisters..internet is decieving..dont start a virtual relationship because satan is playing with u..theres nthing wrong with forums..but taking one step too far is stupid..completely stupid..dumb dumb dumb...its not real man..:rolleyes:

[Cashew]

I am not Muslim, so please consider my comments accordingly.

I think we should probably make a distinction between instant messages and letter writing.

While the former presents obvious problems to anyone faithful to Muslim precepts of modesty, the latter, letter writing, if done properly, can actually be a very valuable tool for getting to know someone quite well.

For young serious young Muslims, this would of course necessarily require sharing any and all letters with a responsible third party, such as a parent or walli.

(This was how courtship was conducted in the Western world until very recently. The suitor's letters were studied and scrutinized by the family long before any face to face meeting took place.)

I think it would be very, very helpful to exchange letters on such topics as the way you want to raise children according to Islamic teaching or the sort of material expectations you have for married life.

It's one thing to just blurt something out in a conversation. It's another thing entirely to sit down and compose your thoughts and put them on paper where they can be examined and weighed by others.

[Salman Al-Farsi]

bump

[ze leetle elper]

Hmm :p

[LastFriday]

So what about like, having found a spouse online? o.O A lot of people have gotten married by finding their spouse online no? Or are we strictly speaking BF/GF relationships?

[AbuMubarak]

i disagree

though there are many dangers online, they are no worse than those offline

people who meet offline have illicit affairs, people who meet offline engage in haram speech, meet clandestinely and a host of other sins

simillarly with the internet

you have to learn to be muslim whether you are online or offline, there is no difference

shaytan is as much an enemy to you offline as he is to you online

at least online you cannot have zina of the private parts........you cant get pregnant online (for that, you have to go offline)

[Salman Al-Farsi]

I think the problem is that most good Muslims who would never cross the line in reality would perhaps sub consciously do so online without worrying about disrepute because they are just a mere username after all.

[the_middle_road]

I think the problem is that most good Muslims who would never cross the line in reality would perhaps sub consciously do so online without worrying about disrepute because they are just a mere username after all.

Exactly. Because it's the Net, people might do things they wouldn't normally do in real life.

[MrOnline]

A very good thread, alhamdulillah! :up:

[AbuMubarak]

Exactly. Because it's the Net, people might do things they wouldn't normally do in real life.which is exactly my point

dont approach the net anonymously, be who you are, not someone else

one example i like to cite is the usage of names that are not you, if my name is XYZ, there is a tendency to act like a fool

but if your name is Abdullah, then go by that name, you are more connected with what you are saying and doing

[MMS]

imagine you actually got married to the virtual person, so like its not haraam, but you can keep the relationship virtual and only communicate over the internet :rotfl: i think that would have many benefits, because you can block them when they get on yer nerves :hidban:

[Hiking]

imagine you actually got married to the virtual person, so like its not haraam, but you can keep the relationship virtual and only communicate over the internet :rotfl: i think that would have many benefits, because you can block them when they get on yer nerves :hidban:

but then wouldn't it be a sin to block your husband/wife? :rofl1:

[Umm Haya]

imagine you actually got married to the virtual person, so like its not haraam, but you can keep the relationship virtual and only communicate over the internet :rotfl: i think that would have many benefits, because you can block them when they get on yer nerves :hidban:

What happens when they get a virus though? :(

[MMS]

but then wouldn't it be a sin to block your husband/wife? :rofl1:

bring me the daleel :rotfl: where does it say its haraam to block your spouse :o

[xyz]

which is exactly my point

dont approach the net anonymously, be who you are, not someone else

one example i like to cite is the usage of names that are not you, if my name is XYZ, there is a tendency to act like a fool

but if your name is Abdullah, then go by that name, you are more connected with what you are saying and doing

Abumubarak please will u stop using my name in vain :rolleyes:

[Hiking]

bring me the daleel :rotfl: where does it say its haraam to block your spouse :o

LOL :D I'm just wondering, I mean, how can you stay angry with your spouse and not want to make it up?? I mean, isn't there something about not going to sleep angry with your husband/wife? :p

[LastFriday]

Abumubarak please will u stop using my name in vain :rolleyes:

:rotfl:

Mods please change my name back to Tyrome Ibn Biggins

[idil]

how come most of the examples mention are women cases??? we really need to take into account from both sides.