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Billie
07-11-05, 09:28 PM
Forced Marriages
Imam Ibn Taymiyyah
Tuesday, July 12, 2005

May a father force his virgin daughter who attained puberty to marry? Two well-known opinions in this regard are reported from Ahmad:


That he may compel her. This is also the opinion of Maalik, ash-Shaafi`ee, and others.
That he may not. This is also the opinion of Aboo Haneefah and others, and is the correct one.
People have differed as tot he reason permitting the compulsion: whether it is virginity, the daughter being under-aged, or a combination of both. The closest opinion to the truth is her being under-aged, whereas no one can compel a grown-up virgin in marriage. Aboo Hurayrah, radhiallahu `anhu reported that the Prophet, sallallahu `alaihi wa sallam, said:

"A non-virgin woman may not be married without her command, and a virgin may not be married without her permission; and enough permission for her is to remain silent (because of her natural shyness)." [Al-Bukhaaree, Muslim, and others]

Thus the Prophet, sallallahu `alaihi wa sallam, prohibits forcing a virgin in marriage without her permission, whether it be her father or someone else. Furthermore, `Aa';ishah, radhiallahu `anhaa, said that she asked the Prophet, sallallahu `alaihi wa sallam, "In the case of a young girl whose parents marry her, should her permission be sought or not?" He replied, "Yes, she must give her permission." She then said, "But a virgin will be shy, O Allaah’s Messenger." He answered:

"Her silence is [considered as] her permission." [Al-Bukhaaree, Muslim, and others]

This applies to the father as well as others. Furthermore, Islaam does not give the father the right to use any of her wealth without her permission, how then could he be allowed to decide, without her permission, how her body (which is more important than her wealth) is to be used, specially when she disagrees to that and is mature to decide for herself?

Also, there is evidence and concensus in Islaam to restrict an underage person’s free control of his wealth or person. However, to make a virginity a reason for the restriction contradicts the Islaamic basis.

As for the difference between the non-virgin and virgin in the hadeeth of the Prophet, sallallahu `alaihi wa sallam, it is not a differentiation between compulsion and non-compulsion; the difference between the two cases is that (a) the former gives her instructions for the marriage whereas the latter gives permission, and that (b) the virgin’s silence counts as a permission. The reason for this is that a virgin would be shy to discuss the matter of marriage, so she is not proposed to directly; rather, her walee (guardian) is approached, he takes her permission, and then she gives him the permission not the command to marry her.

And as for a non-virgin, she would not have the shyness of virginity anymore; thus she can discuss the matter of her marriage, she can be proposed to, and she gives the command to her walee to perform the marriage, and he must obey her.

Thus the walee is command-executor in the case of the non-virgin, and is permission-seeker in the case of the virgin. This is what the Prophet's words indicate. As for compelling her to marry despite her loathing to do so, this would contradict the fundamentals and reason. Allaah ta`ala did not permit a walee to force her to sell or rent her property without her permission. Neither did He permit him to force her to eat or drink or wear that which she does not wish. How would He then oblige her to accompany and copulate with a person whose company she hates - at the time when Allaah ta`ala has sent between the two spouses love and mercy? If such company happens despite her hatred and repulsion, where is the love and mercy?

From Islaam.com

ok so if this is so then why do millions of muslims girls some as young as 12-13 get forced in2 marriages for the sake of their parents, 'izzat', wealth/jazath/zameen and sometimes zidd??? why this zulm on our sisters? :(

cheeky
07-11-05, 09:43 PM
JazaakAllahu khairan for the article. In answer to ur question...I dont know...ask the parents...maybe their 'izzat' is more important to them than the happiness of their duaghter..Allahu alam.

Hekmaa
08-11-05, 07:49 AM
The issue has never been Islam, but the cultures.

babysara
08-11-05, 12:32 PM
i agree, but the prophet(saw) did say that you need to have the consent of the woman/girl who is to get married....

this is not just based on the religion but also on the beliefs....like say if the woman was forced in to marriage, she wont stay happy and it could result in divorce and tears....

The issue has never been Islam, but the cultures.

in_exile
08-11-05, 01:23 PM
need to check this article... as far as I have read Imam Shafi nor Imam Malik stated you can compel a daughter to marry, the rest of the article is good mashallah.

the womans consent is a prerequistite for the marriage in all the madhaib.

Billie
08-11-05, 05:49 PM
JazaakAllahu khairan for the article. In answer to ur question...I dont know...ask the parents...maybe their 'izzat' is more important to them than the happiness of their duaghter..Allahu alam.

:salams

that was a closed question. wot i'm trying to point out is this is not the done thing in Islam yet millions of parents with good knowledge of the religion still go against this hadith.

yeah ur rite to some parents their izzat is more important to them than their children's happiness, how terrible is that.

i know several girls whose marriages have ended up in a divorce only cos of their parents emotional blackmailling. more recently a cousin who's grandmother and dad forced her into marriage with a guy in pakistan, she hadnt even met before. that was only 5 months ago and now she's divorced him. :scratch: