View Full Version : Would you or Did you?
For the single people, would you want to talk to your fiance before getting married, (even if it was only once, with a mahram present, you have seen them just havent talked). Or would you just wait till after marriage.
For the married people, did you talk to your fiance before or not, advantages/disadvantages.
For me, i would just wait till after i got married :)
Ok take this scenario
say u get engaged in January and u gonna get married in september everything is fixed and all..cud u seriously go that long without no contact or talking to each other?
Salman Al-Farsi
18-07-05, 11:06 AM
I agree with Sajid, the period in between is where its ligitimate for the guy and girl to see each other responsibly (not going out on candle dinners), to discuss marriage plans and find out more for each other because its the perfect oppertunity to be sure the person is a good suitor.
I dont think its correct to be engaged for years and years before marriage...thats warped, it should be few months.
Yup..
its not only that but i think there are emotions aspects attached to it as well,
fair play candle lit dinners and all thats not a good idea..but i would talk to further discuss future plans and get to know that person more...u can never stop knowing more about a person ;)
For the single people, would you want to talk to your fiance before getting married, (even if it was only once, with a mahram present, you have seen them just havent talked). Or would you just wait till after marriage.
For the married people, did you talk to your fiance before or not, advantages/disadvantages.
For me, i would just wait till after i got married :)
Why would anyone not talk to their future partner before getting married? how are you suppossed to get to know the person? who says you don't end up not liking his personality and mentality to other things apart from Islam? and may I just add why are people still asking this question?
do you mean not talk at all???????? then how would you know that you wanted to marry that person?
i would defs wanna talk to em...obviously in a halaal way .... and this is allowed in islaam
.: Anna :.
18-07-05, 12:57 PM
I agree with what everyone is saying... you have to talk at least a bit. You can not marry someone without speaking one word!! well... you could, but don't you think it's better 2 make sure u actually like them?? You're making a big commitment to them, and since we are allowed within Islam to talk to them about wedding plans, get 2 know a bit about them etc then insha allah I think it is better to use that opportunity.
As for me I am married, and I had talked to him before. I would have felt a bit :S marrying a bro that I never even said one word to
Ok take this scenario
say u get engaged in January and u gonna get married in september everything is fixed and all..cud u seriously go that long without no contact or talking to each other?
That happened to my cousin, and his engagement broke off, how stupid they both feel, because they talked regularly, planned etc. You never know.
muslimah85
18-07-05, 07:10 PM
Is it even a question to ask whether you would talk o the person you intend to marry beforehand?
Of coure you have to :confused: this is one of the reasons some maraiges fail is because the couple have not got to know each other before. I dont mean intimatly or very closely, but the chance and ability to get to know what kind of a person you are and i have to agree with br sajid and salman, it vital to get to know a person, you cant take them for face value these days.
Maraige is not a conve
Freshie
18-07-05, 07:34 PM
If I talk or not no matter if I get visa. if I get engaged i can apply for permenant visa, i dont have to time to talk shalk.
SoulAsylum
18-07-05, 07:36 PM
Agree with Salman and Sajid, getting to know one another before marriage is very important. It builds the relationship and is a chance for each other to get to know what your future husband/wife is like.
I think the problem in this lies in the issue of the prospective couple being on the phone (and its equivalent) to one another for hours, day in day out.
There is obviously something wrong with that.
But there is nothing wrong, IMHO, in talking to one another before marriage. In moderation of course.
lonely_me
01-08-05, 03:49 AM
The more you talk, the more you get to know him... and personally, I believe when people travel together they get to know one another VERY well...that period of engagment may save you a LOT.
jst my opinion...
why would u want to spend more time with them than you have to? You will be stuck with them for the rest of your life so why speak to them or see them when you dont have to??
*IslamicGirl*
01-08-05, 10:51 AM
:start:
:salams
:D @ Br Jimm
And you can never really know a person but to meet them in the presence of a Mahram i would agree with, ok so shocks like 'my Habibi is bald' etc can be found out after the wedding :p but hey maybe they might have a brill personlity (and a wig :p )
:salams
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