Muslim Women marrying a Non-muslim men [Archive] - Ummah.com

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Baghdad4ever

11-07-05, 01:53 PM

Whats a good explanation for this? I'm still studying about Islam but I'm having a hard time finding out the reason for this. Thanks in advance.

*IslamicGirl*

11-07-05, 02:01 PM

:start:

:salams

Oh Boy....

:salams

11-07-05, 02:06 PM

hmmm, maybe they not into their deen as much

mara

11-07-05, 02:07 PM

Are no rules when the woman follow her heart :)

Mira

11-07-05, 02:08 PM

Plain and simple: You want your kids to be Muslims, you can't marry a non-Muslim man. The kids will always carry their fathers' names. (Let alone the conflicting religious and cultural values)

You believe in the Prophets (3alayhim al salaam) and the Holy Books that came before yours, you cannot marry somebody who doesn't believe in the Prophet of Islam (3alayhi al salaat wa al sallam) and the Holy Qur'an.

If divorce, Allah forbids, happens, you want to be able to have Shariah law applied in fairly distributing the rights of both husband and wife + custody of children.

I can think of many other reasons, but you can do with the above at the mean time. Hope I've been of help! :D

Oh, and an explanation for a so-called Muslim woman marrying a non-Muslim would be: 1) Ignorance, 2) Just a Muslim by name/birth.

*IslamicGirl*

11-07-05, 02:08 PM

:start:

:salams

Are no rules when the woman follow her heart :)

Sorry but what BS!

:freedom:

:salams

mara

11-07-05, 02:11 PM

:start:

:salams

Sorry but what BS!

:freedom:

:salams
Its your opinion, i stick to mine :)

Mira

11-07-05, 02:13 PM

Its your opinion, i stick to mine :)

Are you a Muslim? :)

If not, please keep your opinion to yourself.

*IslamicGirl*

11-07-05, 02:13 PM

:start:

:salams

Its your opinion, i stick to mine :)

Despite if it's not Islamic?

btw are you a Muslim as i might have got the wrong end of the stick here..?

:salams

11-07-05, 02:16 PM

:start:

:salams

Despite if it's not Islamic?

btw are you a Muslim as i might have got the wrong end of the stick here..?

:salams

i doubt very much, how can u be a muslim if u live your life by that ideology

*IslamicGirl*

11-07-05, 02:39 PM

:start:

:salams

Correct me if i'm wrong but Mara was previously 'Masha' before and something tells me this is another alias on ummah.

They have one main one other than Mara.

Wallahu alim.

:salams

mara

11-07-05, 02:40 PM

"i doubt very much, how can u be a muslim if u live your life by that ideology"
I don't have any kind of man in my life, when i will meet him or what ever i will see exactly the ideology.Right now my heart its in her place.Safe place.

*IslamicGirl*

11-07-05, 02:42 PM

:start:

:salams

You didn't answer the Q: are you a Mozlim?

:salams

Mira

11-07-05, 02:46 PM

Al-Nasser

11-07-05, 02:49 PM

do you personally know a Muslim woman married to a non Muslim? (http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthread.php?t=50892)

Mary Carol

11-07-05, 02:59 PM

Not even a father?

How sad :rolleyes:

It is sad, but not insurmountable.

I lost my own mother at 14 and my father at 24 before they could even meet their grandchildren.

Luckily I had the benefit of having good friends with excellent parents who were there to guide me and help me when needed.

But being alone in life is not necessarily a sad event. Being alone doesn't always correlate to lonliness.

It also fosters independance and individuality.

Good traits to have when facing the world.

But, I'm sure mara appreciates the sympathy.

*IslamicGirl*

11-07-05, 03:01 PM

:start:

:salams

Mara hasn't answered the Question and had delibrately avoided it.

Being alone is comforting at times, listening to other people eats away at you. When your alone, that's when you connect with Allah the most :love: for Allah is with you at all times :ahb: :love:

So shall i take mara's silence that she's not a Muslim?

:salams

Baghdad4ever

11-07-05, 03:48 PM

:start:

:salams

Oh Boy....

:salams

Can you repeat that in english? I'm still learning arabic even though i'm arab...so shoot me.

*IslamicGirl*

11-07-05, 03:50 PM

:start:

:salams

Can you repeat that in english? I'm still learning arabic even though i'm arab...so shoot me.

Sure :)

It's an explosive topic on Ummah :D

P.S. i won't shoot you :p

:salams

Baghdad4ever

11-07-05, 04:24 PM

SO I guess you're telling me to do a search? That I will do thanks ;)

abdulhakeem

11-07-05, 10:18 PM

Why is it not permissible for a Muslim woman to marry a kaafir man (http://63.175.194.25/index.php?ln=eng&ds=qa&lv=browse&QR=21047&dgn=4)

AbuMubarak

12-07-05, 03:42 AM

i dont think she is muslim, so why is everyone getting so worked up

to many kuffar, religion is nothing more than a personal experience, like having gas

but as muslims, we are to obey Allah and His Messenger and a muslim would never say anything that narcisistic

as far as those who love to chime in with every kafir that enters the board, hopefully, they will invest some time to learn their islam, so they dont stick out like a sore thumb everytime they open their mouth

AbuMubarak

12-07-05, 03:43 AM

umi says

the arabic is as salaamu alaykum, wa alaykum salaam and there is no god but Allah

AbuMubarak

12-07-05, 03:44 AM

also, in the name of Allah, the Gracious, the Merciful

Baghdad4ever

12-07-05, 06:24 AM

also, in the name of Allah, the Gracious, the Merciful

Thank you man. I'm kinda ashamed of not knowing how to read my own language:embar:

Chained_Water

19-07-06, 03:40 AM

Came across this:
Love in all its glory and misery.
Answered by Ustadha Zaynab Ansari

Q.
In the name of Allah Subhaana Wa-Taala Most Merciful,

Greetings.

Repeatedly I've read that "falling in love", ('love' being the emotional 'sensation' of deep spiritual attraction), is NOT haraam.

I've also read that Muslim men may marry to Christian or Jewish women (people of the book). Whilst Muslim women may ONLY marry Muslim men.

--Unfortunately, "love" has plans of its own...

--Also unfortunately so does Shaytaan...

Now, I'm not bitter or spiteful or disgruntled, for Allah(SWT) knows best... but when North American Muslim women are equally responsible for raising children, does it not seem that SOMETHING could be worked out (hypothetically) if a Muslim woman and a Christian man were to marry?

Supposing that a Muslim woman and a Christian man (were allowed to get) married...and for the protection of religion, agreed NOT to have children...wouldn't THAT work?

Many many many people have asked me "why" men may have the "choice" but women may "not". (Kaffirs, what can you do? as far as explaining, that is.)

Now, I'll stop skirting subjects and talk straight out: I love someone. 'Have-fallen-in-love-with' someone, rather. Completely in ethical situations in which a 'guiding male' (of my direct family) was present. This 'man' of which I speak claims not to be Christian (like his birth religion)..but "uncertain". Without my prompting he has basically listed every Islamic fundamental as "his" belief. One ultimate and superior God to be loved and feared. He prays to "God", and refers to Allah(SWT) as "Him". He seemingly denies that Aisa (AS) is the "son-of-God" (..Staghfirulahilatheem). ..Now, I've been trying to discreetly guide him to Islam, and I'm SURE he has researched on his own. ..but in my heart I don't want to marry someone whose only intention for converting would be 'moi'.

At the same time, I really don't understand how I could ever live without this person. Like I said, "love" has its own ideas..and you can 'love' someone with all your heart without even saying a word. Seeing someone's actions: compassionate and respectful, earnest and honest, ..well, that's all it really takes.

To clarify: at this point, without any haraam between myself and this person..and without unnecessary secrecy or wrongdoing.. I feel like I would rather live my life alone, than be married to someone else. Hastily spoken, I realize. But my silent love for him (and his for me) is so unbelievably strong that I think I would be betraying any other man (with my heart's affections) if I agreed to marry. Alot to say...but it's a heavy burden I carry..and unfortunately where I am there are no Muslim sisters to help me.

Jazaak Allahu Khairan, many questions, I know.. I'm just a young Muslimah trying to hold to faith, make the right decisions, and quell my heart's everlasting longings...

May Allah(SWT) rain mercy on us all.

A.

In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful

Dear Sister,

I pray this message finds you in a state of strong iman and nearness to Allah Ta'ala.

Yes, love does cause us to do strange things.

There is a saying in Arabic,
"Verily love renders one deaf and blind."

I have to be honest with you about your predicament.

1. You said that this gentleman has "basically listed every Islamic fundamental as "his" belief." And he "seemingly denies that Aisa (AS) is the "son-of-God." Okay, so why hasn't he taken his shahada yet? What's preventing him from taking this step? Have you considered the possibility that you may be distracting him from what he really needs: some time and space to consider this momentous decision. How can either of you sort out your feelings and set your priorities if you're a distraction to each other? I don't mean to sound harsh, but there is no benefit in encouraging a relationship that is not countenanced by Sacred Law. Either this gentleman accepts Islam or he doesn't. There's really no in between.

2. You said you've "been trying to discreetly guide him to Islam." Why be discreet? If he has good relations with your male relatives, which it sounds like he does, they why not be up front? Once again, you need to extricate yourself from the picture. Right now, your emotions are going to complicate things even more.

3. I'm not saying that you're going to stop having feelings for this person. What I am saying is that I'm concerned. Concerned because you're trying to find some justification for marrying a non-Muslim man, when we've been emphatically forbidden from doing so.

Dear Sister, you've placed yourself, perhaps unwittingly, in a very compromising situation. And now shaytan is trying to mislead you with all sorts of doubts about our way of life. The Qur'an's guidance is timeless. There's a great deal of wisdom behind why Muslim women may only marry Muslim men. Even if you marry this person and decide not to have children, is that really fair? Is it fair to yourself? Is it fair to him? Absolutely not. If you want to have a loving, healthy relationship, then you need to ground your relationship in the guiding light of Sacred Law. If this person is serious about his convictions, then becoming Muslim should be his next step.

The prohibition behind marrying non-Muslim men goes to the very heart of Muslim marriage and the divinely-ordained patterns of married life. The man is the amir of his household. Allah Ta'ala has given him qawwamah, protective maintenance and supervision, over his family based on his God-fearingness and uprightness. A non-Muslim man, no matter how nice, simply can't fulfill this basic requirement of qawwamah.

4. Matters of the heart are difficult to legislate. Nonetheless, we have the example of Muslim women before us who chose Allah over their love for a man. Umm Talha, may Allah be well pleased with her, is an inspiration to all of us. When Abu Talha, may Allah be well pleased with him, approached her for marriage, he was not a Muslim. She realized that he would make a good husband. She was obviously attracted to him. But her love for Allah was stronger. What did she tell him? "I will never marry you until you are a Muslim." When he asked her what dowry he could give to win her over, she replied, "I shall consider your acceptance of Islam as my dowry."

May Allah Ta'ala lift this heavy burden from your heart. May Allah Ta'ala guide this person to Islam. May Allah Ta'ala make our actions solely for His sake.

Please don't hesitate to let me know how you are doing.

And Allah knows best.
And Allah alone gives success.

sunnipath.com

Maureen

21-07-06, 05:25 AM

do you personally know a Muslim woman married to a non Muslim? (http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthread.php?t=50892)
Many years ago in the north of India, I met an Englsh woman who did not have a faith herself, but was married to a Muslim. They were an older couple and in fact had three adult children (who took their father's religion).
The couple seemed ideally happy. I did not know her well enough to start asking questions about the marriage as related to faith, but I have often wondered about it.