wanna get married?

[Salman Al-Farsi]

Assalam Alaykum

Sadly I am at work today.. due to some crisis in our office in Portugal... as if I care, so I done this.. enjoy:

What to look for when looking for marriage partner

With respect to marriage, finding a partner is the first issue we face. For some Muslim brothers, the most important criterion when looking for a wife is that she must be as beautiful as a supermodel. This is the effect of the shallow western popular culture which places great emphasis on looks and beauty. In the West (and in many Muslim countries) women in adverts are beautiful, movie stars are beautiful, and women who are not so beautiful are always being pushed to find ways to be beautiful. For some Muslim sisters, the most important criterion is the partner’s wealth and status. So she may reject a teacher or restaurant worker (who has taqwa) because he earns less than £25,000 and is not a lawyer or a doctor. This is because society places great emphasis on wealth and status. For some parents, the most important criterion for a partner for their son or daughter is that he comes from the same tribe or country. So some Pakistanis would refuse a Bengali, some Bengalis would refuse a Pakistani, some Arabs would refuse Africans, some Africans would refuse Arabs and some Mirpuris would refuse Jhelumis. The ideas of nationalism and tribalism rear their ugly heads at these times even though Islam made them haram. Parents who refuse prospective partners on this un-Islamic basis cause immense corruption and frustration in the lives of this noble ummah. More often each year we see young Muslim men and women who are attracted to each other running away from home, or having haram relationships. Facing this form of oppression caused them to stop trusting their parents and respecting their feelings, so they even lost their respect for the Islamic rules about these issues. Such parents should remember the warning of our Prophet (saw). Abu Hatim al-Muzni (ra) narrated; “When someone proposes for your daughter and his character and morals are agreeable to you, then give to him in marriage. If you do not there will be tribulation and immense corruption in the earth.”

Islam made clear what we should look for in a partner. Abu Hurayrah (ra) reported that the Prophet (saw) said;

“A woman is married for four things; her wealth, lineage, beauty and Islamic character (deen). So gain success with the one who possesses a good character (deen).”

So the most important thing to look for in a partner is their Islamic character, though that is not the only thing one can look for. After all, which man will care for his wife properly except the one who has taqwa? Which woman will raise pious Muslim children except the one who has taqwa? We are allowed to seek beautiful women or men from good family backgrounds who are wealthy, but the most important factor is their deen. What a bonus it is if one finds a partner with good deen, wealth, lineage and beauty.

waslaam

[MG]

very good post bro, j/k, may allah (swt) reward u.ameen.


BTW- i can see that even tho u r at work, u have "no work" to do :rolleyes:

[Neyzen]

Assalamu Alaikum

MashaAllah such a good article akhi. Unfortunately people do so. May Allah lead us to the truth. amin!

ws

Neyzen

[Salman Al-Farsi]

very good post bro, j/k, may allah (swt) reward u.ameen.


BTW- i can see that even tho u r at work, u have "no work" to do :rolleyes:

Barakallahu feek sis :)

I get paid to show my face around.. seeing my face makes everyone very confident at work :P

[MG]

Barakallahu feek sis :)

I get paid to show my face around.. seeing my face makes everyone very confident at work :P

mashallah, must be one helluva face....

[sajid]

Good article

[Salman Al-Farsi]

mashallah, must be one helluva face....

:embar:

[MG]

:embar:


:rotfl:

[veilofmysoul]

lol mashalllah great post and o so very true you really do have a lot of time on your hands :p... i guess that rani thread gave you some motivation :p ...lol

[MG]

lol mashalllah great post and o so very true you really do have a lot of time on your hands :p... i guess that rani thread gave you some motivation :p ...lol

see? im not the only one that thinks that bro, keep the good threads coming bro.

[Salman Al-Farsi]

A black (revert) friend of mine wanted to marry a pakistani sister. So he turned up at the mirpuri household on his own to ask for her hand. Of course the father told him to take a hyke, pakistanis have this attitude towards black people. So he turned around and said 'if Bilal Habshi (ra) came to ask for your daughter, would you not give him'.. it had good effect on the father.

The brother is in Makkah right now with his Pakistani wife... Jammy git. :D

[Salman Al-Farsi]

lol mashalllah great post and o so very true you really do have a lot of time on your hands :p... i guess that rani thread gave you some motivation :p ...lol

That rani thread mysteriously disappeard to my joy :D

I am gonna try to do some work now. :(

[outlandish]

nice thread

lucky u ,i dont even get paid for working at work.What kind of job do u do.
As for the subject I read this fatwa on askimam.I find this kufu thing quite weird.That marry someone whom is compatable,a syed to a syed etc
Like this fatwa
question:
<BIG>what are the conditions that need to be present for a man and a woman to get married without the parent’s approval….</BIG>

<SMALL>I just wanted to know what are the conditions that need to be present for a man and a woman to get married without the parent’s approval…. On the site, one condition was that if the girl is a sayyida and the boy isn’t, then they have to get the permission of her wali… Are there any other conditions to keep in mind? Jazakoumoullahu khairan Fatima </SMALL>

answer:
The condition for a man and woman to get married without the parent’s approval is that the boy should present his proposal and the girl should verbally accept it in the presence of two mature males or one male and two females. Secondly, both man and woman have to be mature, i.e. both have reached the age of puberty. Thirdly, there has to be kufu (compatibility) between both of them. If there is no compatibility between them, the Awliyaa (legal guardians) will have the right to object the Nikah.

If the girl is Sayyida, then the boy has to be a Sayyid or Shaykh, Alawi, Ansari or an Arab. Arabs among each other are regarded as Kufu. However, if the boy is none of the abovementioned or at least an Arab, there won’t be Kufu and the Awliyaa will have the right to annul the marriage. (Fataawa Alamgiri vol.1 pg.294)

and Allah Ta'ala Knows Best

Mufti Ebrahim Desai

[Salman Al-Farsi]

I seriously caution people not to get Fatwas from Ibrahim Desai.. he has a habit of speaking his mind over Islamic text and used little daleel.

[muslimah85]

A black (revert) friend of mine wanted to marry a pakistani sister. So he turned up at the mirpuri household on his own to ask for her hand. Of course the father told him to take a hyke, pakistanis have this attitude towards black people. So he turned around and said 'if Bilal Habshi (ra) came to ask for your daughter, would you not give him'.. it had good effect on the father.

The brother is in Makkah right now with his Pakistani wife... Jammy git. :D
subhannallah :D thats a great story mahallah :p

[PiElle]

A black (revert) friend of mine wanted to marry a pakistani sister. So he turned up at the mirpuri household on his own to ask for her hand. Of course the father told him to take a hyke, pakistanis have this attitude towards black people. So he turned around and said 'if Bilal Habshi (ra) came to ask for your daughter, would you not give him'.. it had good effect on the father.

The brother is in Makkah right now with his Pakistani wife... Jammy git. :D

LOL! quick thinking man! May Allah bless him and his family all the way!!!:D

[Salman Al-Farsi]

LOL! quick thinking man! May Allah bless him and his family all the way!!!:D

Ameen. :)

[Saifullah]

nice thread

lucky u ,i dont even get paid for working at work.What kind of job do u do.
As for the subject I read this fatwa on askimam.I find this kufu thing quite weird.That marry someone whom is compatable,a syed to a syed etc
Like this fatwa
question:
<BIG>what are the conditions that need to be present for a man and a woman to get married without the parent’s approval….</BIG>

<SMALL>I just wanted to know what are the conditions that need to be present for a man and a woman to get married without the parent’s approval…. On the site, one condition was that if the girl is a sayyida and the boy isn’t, then they have to get the permission of her wali… Are there any other conditions to keep in mind? Jazakoumoullahu khairan Fatima </SMALL>

answer:
The condition for a man and woman to get married without the parent’s approval is that the boy should present his proposal and the girl should verbally accept it in the presence of two mature males or one male and two females. Secondly, both man and woman have to be mature, i.e. both have reached the age of puberty. Thirdly, there has to be kufu (compatibility) between both of them. If there is no compatibility between them, the Awliyaa (legal guardians) will have the right to object the Nikah.

If the girl is Sayyida, then the boy has to be a Sayyid or Shaykh, Alawi, Ansari or an Arab. Arabs among each other are regarded as Kufu. However, if the boy is none of the abovementioned or at least an Arab, there won’t be Kufu and the Awliyaa will have the right to annul the marriage. (Fataawa Alamgiri vol.1 pg.294)

and Allah Ta'ala Knows Best

Mufti Ebrahim Desai


This sounds so dodgy! , although there is a hadeeth which one can bring in support, but i think he has gone off on a tangent.

[muslimah85]

nice thread

lucky u ,i dont even get paid for working at work.What kind of job do u do.
As for the subject I read this fatwa on askimam.I find this kufu thing quite weird.That marry someone whom is compatable,a syed to a syed etc
Like this fatwa
question:
<BIG>what are the conditions that need to be present for a man and a woman to get married without the parent’s approval….</BIG>

<SMALL>I just wanted to know what are the conditions that need to be present for a man and a woman to get married without the parent’s approval…. On the site, one condition was that if the girl is a sayyida and the boy isn’t, then they have to get the permission of her wali… Are there any other conditions to keep in mind? Jazakoumoullahu khairan Fatima </SMALL>

answer:
The condition for a man and woman to get married without the parent’s approval is that the boy should present his proposal and the girl should verbally accept it in the presence of two mature males or one male and two females. Secondly, both man and woman have to be mature, i.e. both have reached the age of puberty. Thirdly, there has to be kufu (compatibility) between both of them. If there is no compatibility between them, the Awliyaa (legal guardians) will have the right to object the Nikah.

If the girl is Sayyida, then the boy has to be a Sayyid or Shaykh, Alawi, Ansari or an Arab. Arabs among each other are regarded as Kufu. However, if the boy is none of the abovementioned or at least an Arab, there won’t be Kufu and the Awliyaa will have the right to annul the marriage. (Fataawa Alamgiri vol.1 pg.294)

and Allah Ta'ala Knows Best

Mufti Ebrahim Desai
sounds very off tangent, it dosnt really make sense

[Saifullah]

sounds very off tangent, it dosnt really make sense

I think what he is trying to say is that they should be compatible with one another, imagine a young wife, and an old man who does not even understand her (ideals and thoughts), and you get them both married, in that sence.

But he then, twists the whole syed argument, to suite a cultural thought, and in essence he is saying, you cant marry her, unless you are of the same social standing or caste. which is complete rubbish! and then he adds the walis approval, to justify it further.

:wacko:

[muslimah85]

I think what he is trying to say is that they should be compatible with one another, imagine a young wife, and an old man who does not even understand her (ideals and thoughts), and you get them both married, in that sence.

But he then, twists the whole syed argument, to suite a cultural thought, and in essence he is saying, you cant marry her, unless you are of the same social standing or caste. which is complete rubbish! and then he adds the walis approval, to justify it further.

:wacko:
exactly! thats my point, he clearly correctly addresses the issue of compatibility, but in terms of how he tries to assert that the couple should be culturally suited is wrong. This is not what has been tought and preached in islam it is very contraversial and uncanny!

He needs to re-read the books of knowledge again:)

[outlandish]

hmm is a scholar so i doubt he hasnt read those hadith and evidence from quran stating no one if superior to the other except in piety.

so its really strange to me that he says such a thing and on what he bases this,since many muslims seek knowledge from that site. Saying such things just add to how our cultures are that marry within pakis or family,to keep within lineage. And why is a syed better than a non syed?

[Salman Al-Farsi]

Assalam Alaykum

I dont think we should go into this. But I ve known and followed his fatwas for long time, and most of them are his own opinions or whatever comes in his mind, he pays little attention to evidences or deriving a ruling. He is not really a scholar and does not qualify the title of Mufti, he is a Mutaabbi 'Ammi which means he does not posses the necessary tools to derive an opinion directly from the Quran and the Sunnah rather has to resort to a scholar from the past centruy and rely on his opinion. I have stated this many times before, it is very irresponsible for any scholar to approach fiqh in this manner especially nowdays. The result of this approach are very dangerous where he has given erroneous fatwas like TV itself is haraam, in another fatwa he said its permissable to attend celeberations of non-muslims. (astaghfirullah).

We as followers should take this seriously and approach those with deep knowledge, not some person who has memorised from an old text book of fiqh.

Sunnipath.com is a great resource on fiqhi matters :)

[Omar]

Sure why not

[muslimah85]

Sure why not
????

[Omar]

????

:confused:

[muslimah85]

:confused:
lol! i dont undertand what you meant by sure why not :p

[Saifullah]

Assalam Alaykum

I dont think we should go into this. But I ve known and followed his fatwas for long time, and most of them are his own opinions or whatever comes in his mind, he pays little attention to evidences or deriving a ruling. He is not really a scholar and does not qualify the title of Mufti, he is a Mutaabbi 'Ammi which means he does not posses the necessary tools to derive an opinion directly from the Quran and the Sunnah rather has to resort to a scholar from the past centruy and rely on his opinion. I have stated this many times before, it is very irresponsible for any scholar to approach fiqh in this manner especially nowdays. The result of this approach are very dangerous where he has given erroneous fatwas like TV itself is haraam, in another fatwa he said its permissable to attend celeberations of non-muslims. (astaghfirullah).

We as followers should take this seriously and approach those with deep knowledge, not some person who has memorised from an old text book of fiqh.

Sunnipath.com is a great resource on fiqhi matters :)

Your peer title has been revoked! ..... oh wait! i just realised, someone once should be this website with all these really stupid questions, and maybe it was this persons website, in one question, he was trying to address the issue of undergarments, and he did not know what a 'bra' was, and he still gave a comment.

and sorry to be harsh, but i agree, this person is not a mufti, he just another dude trying his best, he does not have the qualities and qualifications to be a mufti.

[Salman Al-Farsi]

Your peer title has been revoked! ..... oh wait! i just realised, someone once should be this website with all these really stupid questions, and maybe it was this persons website, in one question, he was trying to address the issue of undergarments, and he did not know what a 'bra' was, and he still gave a comment.

and sorry to be harsh, but i agree, this person is not a mufti, he just another dude trying his best, he does not have the qualities and qualifications to be a mufti.

'Followed his Fatwas' - not as in Taqleed but critically to make a judgement on his qualifications.

Now you may renew your pledge of mureedhood. :up:

[Omar]

lol! i dont undertand what you meant by sure why not :p

ohh what i ment is sure why not

[muslimah85]

ohh what i ment is sure why not
okey then :rotfl: lets leave it @)

[Abdul-Curim]

jazakallah khayrun akhi salman , some one had to warn muslims here about shaykh ibrahim desai . ive already highlighted some of his contradicting opinions on certain issues in the pvt forums .

http://islamqa.com is more reliable .

[Salman Al-Farsi]

jazakallah khayrun akhi salman , some one had to warn muslims here about shaykh ibrahim desai . ive already highlighted some of his contradicting opinions on certain issues in the pvt forums .

http://islamqa.com (http://islamqa.com/) is more reliable .

Jazakallahu khayr bro.

[Umm Layth]

~~ Official anti-Mufti desai thread ~~ :rolleyes:

:nuts:

[Niqaabi]

I havent heard of this man, but his human he'll make mistakes.
Hadeeths are from the prophet and this fatwa is from a failble muslim, so in the hadeeth is superior.

Alhamdulillah, there are more pakis being married to other ehtnicities, insha'Allah soon everyone else will follow.
Alhamdulillah, my mum said i can marry whoever i want as long as he is a practising muslim :D

And if anyone cares i passed my theory today! masha'Allah my day has been good!

[Umm Layth]

I havent heard of this man, but his human he'll make mistakes.
Hadeeths are from the prophet and this fatwa is from a failble muslim, so in the hadeeth is superior.

Alhamdulillah, there are more pakis being married to other ehtnicities, insha'Allah soon everyone else will follow.
Alhamdulillah, my mum said i can marry whoever i want as long as he is a practising muslim :D

And if anyone cares i passed my theory today! masha'Allah my day has been good!


All humans make mistakes.. but his mistakes can misguide ppl becasue he claims to be scholar but from what i have read he is under-qualified.

anyway.


C O N G R A D U L A T I O N S !!!

Well done sis !!! :up:

take the car and go do practical :D

:fastcar:

[Niqaabi]

aww jazakillahu khair sis!!!
insha'Allah gona take my practical slowly! wana pass first time round insha'Allah!
Yeh i agree with you, but its up to us to leave him in this matter and go to the haqq!
take care sis
:salams

[muslimah85]

sis try to pass your test asap! the quicker you do it the better , once you get to uni though it'll be hard, the best thing is when you get your first car, i still love my baby *checks to see if its still parked in the driveway * :D

[Ebony]

I agree with muslimah85

Quicker you get the test done, the easier it'll be for you.

Best to get it out of the way (like i did)

[The driving test that is...im not talking about marriage!]


Ws

[muslimah85]

I agree with muslimah85

Quicker you get the test done, the easier it'll be for you.

Best to get it out of the way (like i did)

[The driving test that is...im not talking about marriage!]


Ws
you sure about that? the sentance can be interpreted in a number of ways :D

[Ebony]

you sure about that? the sentance can be interpreted in a number of ways :D

Hence reason I cleared up any misunderstanding that could arise :D

[Songbird]

A black (revert) friend of mine wanted to marry a pakistani sister. So he turned up at the mirpuri household on his own to ask for her hand. Of course the father told him to take a hyke, pakistanis have this attitude towards black people. So he turned around and said 'if Bilal Habshi (ra) came to ask for your daughter, would you not give him'.. it had good effect on the father.
Once at work, I was narrating a cute story about how my cat Kenya helped herself to my yummy roast chicken that I had on the kitchen bench, and the brother I work with quipped: "I can't stand cats, I don't know how you live with them".

My immediate retort was: "Would you have said that if Abu Huraira RA were stood in front of you?". He bowed his head in shame and replied "Sorry sister..."

:inlove: Abu Huraira :inlove:

[muslimah85]

Hence reason I cleared up any misunderstanding that could arise :D
how good of you,! still seems they'res some kind of discrepency though :p

[Salman Al-Farsi]

Hadith - Sahih Bukhari Volume 7, Book 62, No. 1, Narrated Anas bin Malik


A group of three men came to the houses of the wives of the Prophet :saw: asking how the Prophet worshipped (Allah), and when they were informed about that, they considered their worship insufficient and said, "Where are we from the Prophet as his past and future sins have been forgiven." Then one of them said, "I will offer the prayer throughout the night forever." The other said, "I will fast throughout the year and will not break my fast." The third said, "I will keep away from the women and will not marry forever." Allah's Apostle came to them and said, "Are you the same people who said so-and-so? By Allah, I am more submissive to Allah and more afraid of Him than you; yet I fast and break my fast, I do sleep and I also marry women. So he who does not follow my tradition in religion, is not from me (not one of my followers)."


Hadith - Sahih Bukhari, Volume 7, Book 62, Number 4, Narrated 'Abdullah


We were with the Prophet while we were young and had no wealth whatever. So Allah's Apostle said, "O young people! Whoever among you can marry, should marry, because it helps him lower his gaze and guard his modesty, and whoever is not able to marry, should fast, as fasting diminishes his sexual power."


Sufyan ibn 'Uyaynah


Sufyân ibn ‘Uyaynah (rahimahullâh) said, "The most nimble of creatures still have need of a voice. The cleverest women still need to have a husband, and the cleverest man still needs to consult wise men."


Hadith - Bukhari 7.28, Narrated Sahl


A man passed by Allah's Apostle and Allah's Apostle asked (his companions) "What do you say about this (man)?" They replied, "If he asks for a lady's hand, he ought to be given her in marriage; and if he intercedes (for someone) his intercessor should be accepted; and if he speaks, he should be listened to." Allah's Apostle kept silent, and then a man from among the poor Muslims passed by, an Allah's Apostle asked (them) "What do you say about this man?" They replied, "If he asks for a lady's hand in marriage he does not deserve to be married, and he intercedes (for someone), his intercession should not be accepted; And if he speaks, he should not be listened to." Allah's Apostle (saaws) said, "This poor man is better than so many of the first as filling the earth."


Hadith - Al-Tirmidhi #3090, Narrated Abu Hurairah, r.a.


Allah's Messenger (peace be upon him) said, 'When someone with whose religion and character you are satisfied asks your daughter in marriage, accede to his request. If you do not do so, there will be temptation on Earth and extensive corruption.' [Tirmidhi, Nasa'i and Ibn Majah transmitted it.]

[toxic]

Encouragement From a Brother
by Iftikhar

Assalamu alaikum for those of u who read the article "Choosing The Desired Wife", you might have thought that it was too much of a dream... if u did think that, then u better read this little nice story.

I would like to humbly add my thoughts (i.e. my own opinion to this).

When I started looking for a wife, my only intention was to find a muslima that could help me to become a better Muslim. After praying to Allah many times, I came to know that a Muslim brother in my area had an unwed sister. I was told that she was 7 years older than I was, had no college education, and had minor health problems. Despite this, I arranged for a meeting to discuss the possibility of marriage. When I met her, I was impressed by her modesty (she wore a real hijab that covered everything but her face). She was not attractive, nor was she rich. However, at the conclusion of our meeting, I felt comfortable with the fact that she was what I was looking for. After praying Istikhara, I felt confident that she was right for me.

Our nikaah was performed only a few weeks later.
Oh yeah, this was a Muslim wedding - the kind where the men separated from the women, we didn't have disco music or belly dancers or any other kind of kuffar stuff, there might have been one brother who was NOT wearing Sunnah, and we spent most of the time praying, praising Allah, discussing what a great blessing the responsibility of marriage was, etc. I think the total cost of the wedding might have been around $20.00 US (we held it in my brother-in-law's apartment).

I had the time of my life!!!

Despite the fact that she is very stubborn and argumentative, she is one of the best Muslim women a man could ask for. And I am NOT talking about the way she wakes me up in the middle of the night for tahajjud, the way she covers her face in public, the way she investigates every action that I do, the way she will stop talking to me if I dont read the Quran or go to the masjid every day. I am talking about her fear of Allah and love for the prophet Muhammed http://www.yanabi.com/forum/i/expressions/pbuh.gif


Not bad for a woman some people called ugly who has no college education or money.

I wouldn't trade this woman for everything in the world.
Many times when the discussion of marriage arises, I will hear one brother after another talking about how beautiful and educated they want their dream wives to be. Others will talk of love or family/racial pride.

Fools... (with all due respect)

In case some of you are confused as to why I am mentioning all of this let me tell you what I know (straight up)...

A PIOUS WIFE IS YOUR STRONGEST DEFENSE AGAINST SHAITAN

Marry a woman for whatever reason you want.......
My dua' is with you all-


Salamu Alaikum
- Iftikhar

[MG]

that is beautiful toxic, well done.
A message to all the shallow people out there who go for looks and material stuff.

[Niqaabi]

you sure about that? the sentance can be interpreted in a number of ways :D
hehe!
yeh i took your advice and got it out of the way and i failed so
:up: to you both :alhumdull your wonderfull :D

Anyways my next test is coming up, :insha: Allah will pass me if He thinks im ready, make duah please.
nice stuff S.

[Freshie]

yes Boss please :D

[Arsalan]

May Allah give all the youth of the muslim world the taufeeq to get married . Ameen.

[Space Cadet]

I have been reading this post with interest and would like to get the opinions of what others think about a problem that has arisen for my family recently.

My father (in-law) has been seperated from his wife for almost 13 years after she kicked him out of the marital home. He is aged 65 now and has recently been on his annual trip to Makkah for Ramadhan. He is a very outgoing bloke and talks to EVERYBODY!
Anyway he calls me from there to elicit my point of view on him remarrying and to ask what my husbands opinion will be. I assure him that it is the right thing to do and that we are happy for him. He later tells me in another call that the woman is aged 27......that went down like a lead baloon for my husband and his brothers. They understand that my FIL may be getting an ego boost by the attentions of a young woman (who was offered to him by her mother, with the womans consent) but what does she see in him??

Anyway, I tell my FIL on his return, that his children are not happy with the age difference, as although it may be a cultural norm in Saudia it is not here and she may resent being the only young woman married to an old man.
She has been previously married and has 3 young children who all reside with their father. I don't see any problem with a divorcee remarrying/having kids.

What do you think?
I am now regretting telling him that I do not think this is such a hot idea, and feel like now saying that ok, if it's what you want..go right ahead.
Although the sons I know will not agree with me. They still question her motives.

[Space Cadet]

I have been reading this post with interest and would like to get the opinions of what others think about a problem that has arisen for my family recently.

My father (in-law) has been seperated from his wife for almost 13 years after she kicked him out of the marital home. He is aged 65 now and has recently been on his annual trip to Makkah for Ramadhan. He is a very outgoing bloke and talks to EVERYBODY!
Anyway he calls me from there to elicit my point of view on him remarrying and to ask what my husbands opinion will be. I assure him that it is the right thing to do and that we are happy for him. He later tells me in another call that the woman is aged 27......that went down like a lead baloon for my husband and his brothers. They understand that my FIL may be getting an ego boost by the attentions of a young woman (who was offered to him by her mother, with the womans consent) but what does she see in him??

Anyway, I tell my FIL on his return, that his children are not happy with the age difference, as although it may be a cultural norm in Saudia it is not here and she may resent being the only young woman married to an old man.
She has been previously married and has 3 young children who all reside with their father. I don't see any problem with a divorcee remarrying/having kids.

What do you think?
I am now regretting telling him that I do not think this is such a hot idea, and feel like now saying that ok, if it's what you want..go right ahead.
Although the sons I know will not agree with me. They still question her motives.

[Freshie]

May Allah give all the youth of the muslim world the taufeeq to get married . Ameen.

ameen boss.