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Consider
19-05-02, 07:58 PM
http://www.khurasaan.com/s_content.php?id=2002-03-09-0900

Muslim College Life; Dating, Drinking and Deen

Freedom. Young people live for the day when they can move out of the house and go to college and finally be free. Freedom from their parents, from restrictions on their lifestyle, from everyone telling them what to do. This is why in college you find a whole generation that does what they want. Life's short they say, let's enjoy ourselves while we can.

So it goes for Muslims. In college you find the most amazing things, Muslims who don't pray, Muslims who date, Muslims who attend MSA meetings but go out to parties and drink. Why is this happening?

For one, when students go off to university they finally realize that what they beleived in was blind. Religion becomes like a fairytale, when they got old enough, they knew better than to believe in it. Most have little knowledge about Islam and have maybe memorized the right rit! uals to get by. Why beleive something on faith, they ask. After all we cannot see heaven or hell. How do we know Islam is right anyway?

Islamic culture to them means marrying someone they never knew. It means arranged marriages and never hanging out or having fun. For girls Islamic culture has even less to offer. It would mean double standards or having to serve a husband the rest of her life.

The western alternative to this looks alot more attractive. In western culture "love and romance" are supposedly everywhere. Everyone is out looking for love freely. Meeting someone, going out, seeking pleasure sounds alot better. But what about the downside? For love at first sight, you need to have the right image, the right hair, the right clothes. Girls have to aspire to be like the latest supermodels, they have to hold back age. Who's going out with who, what are my friends thinking, what will happen if I don't get the right girl or guy, what is my girlfriend or bo! yfriend thinking, all become important. Frustration, desperation, and unhappiness become the norm.

Imagine all the heartache youth would save if they followed the Islamic alternative. In true Islam, unlike culture, there is no gameplaying. If two people wish to be involved they are both straight with one another. Unlike what goes on today amongst some Muslims, they both meet each other and make a contract to marry. Women are treated with respect, there is no sexual bombardment like there is in western society. Sex in western culture is also often seen as a vice or a sin of the flesh. But even in religious Islam, sex is seen as natural. As long as it is in the right circumstances, when the two are committed to one another in marriage.

Drinking in college is also the norm unfortunately. If you don't drink or party you're seen as weird. Drinking is cool and a way for people to socialize, meet and have fun. The one who doesn't is less of a person and 'misses out'. Drinking and all the harms that come with it is cut off at the root in Islam. So many problems are avoided, accidents, pregnancy, violence and even rape for example.

In college and in the world, success in life is not seen in terms of
religion. It is seen as what other people think, one's careers, how much money they make. If you are religious you must have failed at life. But why do we have this seperation? and this blindness in religion?

The Quran tells us again and again not to have blind faith, not to follow the religion of our forefathers.

Yet, we as Muslims have stopped thinking. We may think about what our friends or other people will say, but we avoid thinking about the real issues. We spend so much time on the opposite sex, thinking about careers, money etc, but we forget to think about death and how much of this we will really be able to take with us?

"Every soul shall have a taste of death and only on the Day of Judgement shall you be paid your full recompense...for the life of this world is but goods and chattels of deception" (Quran 3:185)

Shouldn't we take the time to comtemplate what will happen to us after we hit the grave? After all, what is the point of life if we are not accountable for our actions? If there is no creator, what is the point of being honest or good.

If we really look at our life we see that everything is indefinate, getting a job, even! living until tomorrow. In fact we could die anytime, this is a definate, the _only_ dead certain thing in our life. Most of us believe we can make up for our actions later or we can be religious later. We are gambling. The chances of our dying today are little, but the stakes are high.

Allah reminds us of the importance of this, "O you who beleive, obey Allah as he should be obeyed, and die not except in a state of Islam" (Quran3:102)

Each of us needs to decide. Is Islam right or not? Why don't we take the time, just once, once in our lives to find out if Islam is right. Is the Quran from God or not? We can't see God, but is there a maker to all this? We need to study nature, and the world. We only live once, if Islam is wrong then we should leave it, but if it's right we shouldn't go halfway. We shouldn't go to a club thinking we are only going to 'hang out and are not doing anything wrong' then feel guilty about it later. We shouldn't go on a date or drink, then feel guilty about it, worrying about hellfire. If Islam is right, we should follow it.

On the Day of Judgement it will be us alone who will be asked about our actions. If Islam is right and we are not following this deen completely, we are injuring our own soul, both in t! his life and the next.

"Verily We have revealed the Book to thee in truth, for (instructing)
mankind. He, then that receives guidance beinfits his own soul: but he that strays injurs his own soul..." Quran 39:41

This is the true definition of freedom. To learn about Islam and the world openly. To contemplate about life and death. And after learning the truth, obeying the word of God. "Those on whom knowledge has been bestowed may learn that the (Quran) is the truth from your Lord, and that they beleive therein, and their hearts may be made humbly (open)to it..." Quran 22:54

Once students have this rock-solid intellectual beleif in Islam, the
corruptness and falseness of the people around them is clear. The beauty and wisdom of the islamic way, the best alternative is clear. What other's do is of less importance. If others think they were weird to pray or weird to be honest, they would still pray and still be honest because they know their deen.

The Prophet(! SAW)'s famous hadith to 'seek knowledge even if it leads to china' or to 'seek knowledge from the cradle to the grave' is too often forgotten by students. Our Quran's are left on the top shelves, gathering dust. Sometimes the most it is read is when someone dies. How is this to help, when the guidance comes too late. The Quran is for the living. The path to understanding and following Islam comes from learning first.

How many of us are Muslim, yet have never read the Quran in our native language?

How many of us are Muslim, yet have yet to open a book on hadith or sunnah?

How many of us defend Islam to non-Muslims, but do not follow it ourselves?

May Allah forgive and lead us and all those lost to the straight path,
inshaAllah.

Ameen.

based on a talk by Abdul Wajid "Born to be Brown",

jamila
19-05-02, 08:36 PM
What a beautiful thread. Bintemasood, another thought provoker. I hope people take heed, myself included, and think about the hereafter. It's not far away. It's just round the corner. Looking back, I can say "Where did my life go?" "Surely it was only yesterday that my chheks grew warm thinking of that boy in 6th form. So handsome, grown up and experienced!" "And now, a nothing. ashes from the past. And all that eternity before me! Where has it gone?"
Taubah is now, and finding out what really matters is the only pertinent goal in life. After all, it all goes into the bank. The account we can only use after we are dead.
jamila :)

Usmanb
20-05-02, 01:35 AM
Sallaam

Bintmasood and Jamila both of your thoughts are true and i hope that we all understand what the true meaning of life is and follow the path of true success. I live in Australia and go to Uni as well, so i fully understand the issues that have been raised in this thread. Thank God though i have not touched Alcohol, Drugs or Women (No offence to the women reading this, you would understand what i mean).

What i have seen is exactly what you have mentioned Bintamasood and have to agree that this is widely happening. I have Muslim friends who drink and date, much to my horror. I tell myself that i should not judge these people as i am not the perfect Muslim myself (Read the thread in the Islam forum on Shirk and you'll see what i mean). However i see the only way to true success is through Deen and therefore ask my friends why they act in such a way.

A casepoint, i know a person who i wouldn't call a friend, just an acquantince. When i started at this new school i was very happy that i met a Mulsim in this school, in my year as well. This was simply because in the last school/town of 10 000 myself and my family were the only Muslims. Anyway, he started eating Burgers from the canteen and i thought great, they must be Halal and therefore i can finally dig into a big burger (People who have to eat Vegies when they go out because there is no Halal food would understand the feeling). Anyway, to cut the long story short, In Ramadan he's version of Keeping fast was to obsatin from drinking and sex for the hours of the fast. Later this year when i confronted him for the 6th time i asked him why he drinks, and his reply was that it is the same thing that his Dad and Mum did and thats where he learn't it from. I told him that Alcohol is prohibitied in Islam and then he said that if that is the case then he isn't a Muslim because he doesn't believe it should be.

What i am getting at is that what students do is often not a direct result of them but raher somewhat of what there parents teach them. Alhumdililah my Parents are Muslims and they always say that the only thing they ever want from me is to be a good Muslim. The problem with younger people digressing from Islam has to be addressed at the level of where these people are getting their information as well. As often is the case that parents say that they are Muslims and that drinking is prohibited, and not explain the benefits of not drinking and more importantly that is what Islam requires as well.

All that can be asked is that Allah help as all realise our shortcommings and make us successful in the here and the hereafter.

Usmanb

Bash ah Rat
24-05-02, 03:20 PM
Assalamu alaikum

Subhannallah a beatiful thread

Islam makes seeking knowledge a huge priority it is a pity the ummah does not take heed of this

abaddon
02-06-02, 08:52 PM
You know what the great thing about the west is though....at least the muslims here get to make there own choices about their life, instead of being made to believe and act a certain way like in many othr countries......I am happy the muslims here at least have a choice to live the way they want.......

Bilal
03-06-02, 10:00 AM
In Muslims countries also they live, as they want. Unfortunately most of Islamic countries (54 countries) are corrupted and secular countries, only Iran and Saudi Arabia are religious.

Originally posted by abaddon
You know what the great thing about the west is though....at least the muslims here get to make there own choices about their life, instead of being made to believe and act a certain way like in many othr countries......I am happy the muslims here at least have a choice to live the way they want.......

hen
03-06-02, 01:37 PM
Bilal,
What about Malaysia? Arnt they religious?
Hen

Bilal
03-06-02, 03:40 PM
Of course most of muslims are religious. Malaysian is one of the religious nations , but their goverment is secular.

Originally posted by Hen
Bilal,
What about Malaysia? Arnt they religious?
Hen

AbuMubarak
17-09-02, 02:41 PM
:confused: