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Ruqayyah
16-08-03, 03:22 PM
Backbiting & Slander - an Islamic perspective

And why did you not, when you heard it, say? "It is not right of us to speak of this: Glory to God, this is a most serious slander" (Quran 24:16)
A commentary on one of the most destructive of major sins

Islam is a religion of peace, love and compassion. Lies, suspicion, back biting, slander and gossip are totally alien to Islam. In fact they are considered amongst the most destructive of major sins. This is so because these sins sow enmity and discord among the Muslim Ummah and lead to its destruction. They cause hostilities between people of the same household, and between neighbors, friends and relatives.

Islam demands that our relationship with mankind should be one of sincerity and responsibility. It should be one where we have respect for the honor, reputation and privacy of others. Islam teaches us that we are not only held accountable for our own attitudes and actions but also for anything else over which we have control or influence over, in our society or the world around us.

Verses: Let's see what the Quran states about backbiting and slander -

This is the Book, in it is guidance sure, without doubt, to those who fear God. (2:2)

God has forbidden the believers from backbiting

O you who believe! Avoid much suspicion, in deeds some suspicions are sins. And spy not neither backbite one another. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would hate it (so hate backbiting). And fear God, verily, God is the one who accepts repentance, Most Merciful. (49: 12)

When we reflect deeply over this assimilation it should be enough to keep us away from backbiting!

Do not treat the issue of Backbiting & Slander with indifference because it is a great sin

Behold, you received it on your tongues, and said out of your mouths things which you had no knowledge; and you thought it to be a light matter, while it was most serious in the sight of God (24: 15)

Many of us back bite and gossip without thinking. We think it is minor matter, however God reminds us to be careful and even though we think we are doing something little it is in fact very big in the sight of God!

God teaches us to speak out against Slander and try to put a stop to it

And why did you not, when you heard it, say? "It is not right of us to speak of this: Glory to God, this is a most serious slander" (24:16)

Many people are so busy spreading the slander they hear that they do not even stop to think if it is true or not.

Shaitan (Satan) wants us to use our tongue to create conflict and hatred

Say to My servants that they should only say those things that are best, for Satan does sow dissensions among them, for Satan is to man an avowed enemy. (17:53)

Are we falling into Shaitan's (Satan's) trap? We can all analyze ourselves.

Hadiths: Let's see what Prophet Muhammad said about Backbiting in the hadiths. God states in the Quran - You have indeed in the Messenger of God an excellent pattern of conduct. (33:21)

The definition of Backbiting & Slander

Prophet Muhammad said :"Do you know what backbiting is?" They said, "God and His Messenger know best." He then said, "It is to say something about your brother that he would dislike." Someone asked him, "But what if what I say is true?" The Messenger of God said, "If what you say about him is true, you are backbiting him, but if it is not true then you have slandered him." (Muslim)

We should guard our tongue from sins and use our limbs in acts of obedience

Prophet Muhammad said : "Who protects his tongue from unlawful utterances and his private parts from illegal sexual intercourse, I shall guarantee him entrance into Paradise." (Bukhari and Muslim)

The definition of the best muslim

"I asked the Messenger of God : Who is the best Muslim? The Messenger of God replied, "He is the one from whom Muslims are safe from the evil of his tongue and hands." (Muslim)

Deriding people in their presence by making negative facial expressions or by hand gestures while they are unaware is also a form of backbiting.

We need to beware of the slipping of our tongues

"When man wakes up in the morning each day, all parts of the body warn the tongue saying, ‘Fear God as regards us for we are at your mercy; if you are upright, we will be upright and if you are crooked, we become crooked.’" (At-Tirmidhee)

Summary

Backbiting and slander is so widespread that it has become the topic of people’s meetings and an avenue for expressing their anger, misgivings and jealousy. Those who indulge in backbiting are oblivious of the fact that they are only harming themselves. This is because of the fact that on the Day of Resurrection both the wrongdoer and the wronged will stand before God, Who is the Just Judge, God will then give this wronged person from the good deeds of the person who wronged him in accordance with his wrong by backbiting.

Some situations allow us to inform others of what someone has done. It is allowed for us to inform the authorities when someone does injustice to us or others. It is allowed for us to inform someone who can help a perpetrator from committing further vice. It is also permissible for us to tell whoever seeks our advice on a person for business dealings or marriage. In this case it is not allowed for us to hide what we know about the person so that the enquirer will not be deceived. All these types of speaking about others are lawful.

Islam teaches us that if people are being ridiculed or backbited in our presence, we should defend their honor. If we neglect this, we shall deprive ourselves of ever needed help and mercy from God - If a man's Muslim brother is slandered in his presence, and he is capable of defending him and does so, God will defend him in this world and in the next. But if he fails to defend him, God will destroy him in this world and the next. (Baghawi). What will we do the next time we are tempted to backbite or hear slander in our presence? Right now the choice is ours!

We ask God the Most High, the All Powerful, to teach us that which will benefit us, and to benefit us by that which we learn. May God grant blessings and peace to our Prophet Muhammad and his family and companions.

EZ
16-08-03, 03:27 PM
A good post and a good reminder. A big sin, that can so easily be done at times unaware of actually doing it. :(

Ruqayyah
16-08-03, 03:34 PM
A HUGE sin. May Allah protect us from committing the sin of backbiting and slander. And save us from slander also. Aamin.

Na'udu billah.

.: Anna :.
16-08-03, 04:07 PM
Originally posted by Ruqayyah
A HUGE sin. May Allah protect us from committing the sin of backbiting and slander. And save us from slander also. Aamin.

Na'udu billah. Amin

Peace
16-08-03, 04:27 PM
Originally posted by Ruqayyah
Backbiting and slander is so widespread

Good post! The Khutbah yesterday at at Willesden Library Centre mentioned this too. It was about Morality in general and the importance of being complete examples of the good morality of Islam, honest, trustworthy etc... and he quoted a hadith - i hope i remember it correctly - the prophet said 'the closest of you to me is the best in morality.'

Hassan

AbuNajm
17-08-03, 05:32 PM
also, dont forget that a saying of the scholars, let us backbite for the sake of Allah. On the one hand if a person sins in public, it is not backbiting to warn others of this person, but if a person sins privately, and you happen to see him-her, then it may be considered backbiting to spread knowledge of the persons sins to the public.

when we open others sins to the light of day, perhaps Allah, AWJ, will expose and humiliate us, for surely we all do wrong. on the contrary if we hide what we personally see faulty in our brothers and sisters, perhpas Allah AWJ, will shade us in our reckoning with a Veil from Allah, AWJ.

But when dealing with the sin of kufr or those of the kafiroon we must call out against it and warn against those committing such acts. i do not know of any instance where a muslim is codemned for warning other muslims of the sins of kafiroon.

Ammarah
21-08-03, 01:39 AM
SLANDER
Adapted from : "Slander" by Abdul Malik Al-Qasim
Darussalam Publishers and Distributors

http://www.islamicawakening.com/Sah...th%202000.phtml

The believers are commanded to preserve the spirit of brotherhood andfriendship and to avoid anything that may induce enmity and hatred. As Allahsaid:

"The believers are nothing else than brothers" [Qur`an,49 :10]

and


"Shaytan wants only to excite enmity and hatred between you with intoxicantsand gambling, and hinder you from the remembrance of Allah and from Salat.So will you not abstain?" [Qur`an5 :91]


Allah has also granted the believers a favour by joining their hearts. He said:


"And remember Allah's favour upon you, for you were enemies one to anotherbut He joined your hearts together so that by His Grace you became brethren."[Qur`an3 :103]


Further, He said:


"He it is Who has supported you with His help and with the believersand He has united their hearts. If you had spent all that is in earth, youcould not have united their hearts, but Allah has united them." [Qur`an8 :62-63]


Every Mukallaf (competent person in control of all faculties) shouldsafeguard his tongue against all kinds of loose talk, except when it is evidentthat talking will be a means of beneficence. When talking and being quietare both equal as a prudent measure, then the Sunnah is to abstain from speech.


Abu Hurairah (Radhiallahu `anhu) reported that the Prophet (Sallallahu`Alayhi Wa Sallam) said: "Whosoever believes in Allah and the Last Day shouldspeak what is good or be silent." (Agreed upon)


Imam Shafi`ee said: "If a person wishes to say something then he shouldthink before he starts talking. If there is good, then he should speak, otherwisehe should not."





Definition of Nameemah (Slander)



Nameemah refers to the act of carrying tales from one person to another.It also includes disclosing things that are disliked, whether by the personbeing told, the person being discussed, or a third party. This disclosurecan be by speaking, writing, nodding, intimating (hinting) or signalling.The disclosed matter can be actions or speech, and may be a defect in theperson being discussed or not. The reality of Nameemah is to disclose a secretand expose something about someone who does not like having such a thingexposed.


A person should not talk about anything that he may see in people anddislike. He should only say something if, inherent within it, it is goodfor a Muslim and to block a wrong or harm. If he sees, for example, someonemistreating another's property then he should testify to obtain he rightof the person. But if he sees someone hiding his own property and he disclosesthis, then it is Nameemah - the revealing of a secret. If what is statedis actually a fault or defect about the person being discussed, then it isa combination of Gheebah (backbiting) and Nameemah.


Nameemah is carrying discussions from one to another for the intentionof mischief, disclosing secrets and exposing secret matters. Buhtaan (sayingsomething untrue about a person) about an innocent person is a very gravesin indeed as well.



The Islamic Ruling On Slander


Nameemah is an abomination. It is prohibited by Ijmaa` (consensus ofthe Muslim scholars). There are many clear references from the Qur`an, Sunnah,and Ijmaa` of the Ummah about the prohibition of Nameemah. This act is prohibiteddue to the hatred and enmity it may cause amongst Muslims.



Allah has said:


· "A slanderer going about with calumnies." [Qur`an68 :11]



· "Not a word does he utter, but there is a watcher by him ready [to record it]. [Qur`an50 :18]



· "Woe to every slanderer and backbiter." [Surah104 :1]



· "And those who annoy believing men and women undeservedly, they bear the crime of slander and plain sin." [Qur`an33 :58]




References from the Sunnah:



· Hudhaifah reported that the Prophet (Sallallahu `Alayhi Wa Sallam)said: "A Namaam will never enter Paradise." [al-Bukhari & Muslim].



· The Prophet (Sallallahu `Alayhi Wa Sallam) is also reported to havesaid: "Shall I tell you about the most evil ones from amongst you?" Theysaid, "Of course." He said, "Those who go around with Nameemah. They makeenmity between friends and they seek problems for the innocent." [Ahmad andal-Bukhari in al-Adab al-Mufrad]


· Ibn Abbas (Radhiallahu `Anhu) said: "Allah's Messenger (Sallallahu`Alayhi Wa Sallam) was passing by two graves and said, 'They (the dead layingin these graves) are being tortured not for a major (sin), but in fact, itis a minor (sin). One of them used to carry Nameemah and the other didn'tsave himself from being soiled by his urine.'" [al-Bukhari & Muslim]



We are reminded that Allah recommended reconciliation amongst Muslims:


· "So fear Allah and adjust all matters of differences among you." [Qur`an8 :1]


· The Prophet (Sallallahu `Alayhi Wa Sallam) is reported to have said:"Shall I tell you about acts of a higher rank than Salat, Siyam, and Sadaqah?"They said: "Yes O Messenger of Allah." He said, "Effecting peace among peoplefor the spoiled relationships among people is destruction." [Abu Dawud andTirmidhi]




Motives For Slandering


· Ignorance of the prohibition of Nameemah and the gravity of this sin

· To get things off one's chest such as hatred and malice

· Joining, by agreeing with a group of friends, to draw closer to the group


· To hurt or harm the person being discussed

· To show love and loyalty to the person being told

· Joking or fooling around

· Pretending knowledge of people, their secrets and status







What Should Be Done With The Slanderer



· Do not believe the Namaam for he is an evil person and his testimony is rejected. Allah has said:


"O you who believe! If a Fasiq person comes to you with news, verify it lest you harm people in ignorance." [Qur`an49 :6]



· Stop the Namaam and advise him, for Allah has said:


"Enjoin (people) to Al-Ma`ruf (good) and forbid (people) from Al-Munkar (evil)." [Qur`an31 :17]



· Dislike the Namaam for the sake of Allah, for Allah does not like the Namaam.



· Do not think ill of your absent brethren, for Allah has said:


"O you who believe! Avoid much suspicion, indeed some suspicions are sins..." [Qur`an49 :12]



· Do not be pushed by what has been said to go and check on others and spy. Allah said: "... and spy not..." [Qur`an49 :12]



· Do not accept for yourself what you have forbidden the Namaam fromdoing. Do not spread his Nameemah. Al-Hasan (Radhiallahu `Anhu) said: "Whoevercarries Nameemah to you, will carry one about you." The Prophet (Sallallahu`Alayhi Wa Sallam) is reported to have said: "The worst people before Allahon the Day of Resurrection will be those who, the people leave (undisturbed)to be away from their evil."


"The Qaati` will not enter Paradise." They asked, "Who is the Qaati`?"He said, "The one who severs the bonds among the people." [al-Bukhari &Muslim]







Characteristics of the Slanderer


Allah has said:


"And obey you not everyone Hallaaf Maheen. A slanderer going about withcalumnies, Hinderer of the good, transgressor, sinful, cruel and moreover,base born." [Qur`an68 :10-13]



Allah has described in these verses, the Namaam, with 9 characteristics, all of which are ugly:


· He is Hallaaf: one who swears (vows/attests) much. One who does sois often an untruthful person who suspects that people do not believe himand thus swears to cover up his lying and convince others.



· He is Maheen: worthless



· He is Hamaaz: a slanderer, who criticises and insults people, using words or signals in their presence and absence.



· He goes about with calumnies - misrepresentations or vilification to harm others and create enmity.



· He is an obstacle for good.



· He is a transgressor for he violates truth and justice.



· He is a sinner for he cares not about committing sins and performing prohibited acts.



· He is cruel, harsh, rough and hard.



· He is Zaneem: base born.



The Two-Faced


The Prophet (Sallallahu `Alayhi Wa Sallam) is reported to have said:"You will find that the worst of Allah's slave on the Day of Resurrectionis the two-faced person. He comes to some people with one face and to otherswith another face." [al-Bukhari & Muslim]


Abu Hurairah (Radhiallahu `Anhu) narrated that Allah's Messenger (Sallallahu`Alayhi Wa Sallam) said: "You will find people like metals (in their qualities).The best of them during the days of Jahiliyyah are the best when they enterIslam if they understand Islam. The worst people are the ones who do notaccept Islam. You will find the worst among people the two-faced person.He comes to some people with one face and to others with another face. [al-Bukhari& Muslim]

AbuMubarak
21-08-03, 03:26 AM
thanks sister moderator, a reminder for the believers

i dont know why you didnt post this in the learn about islam forum

AbuMubarak
21-08-03, 03:27 AM
and thats islamawakening link didnt work

Omar Rashid
21-08-03, 12:01 PM
hmmm, a post on slander. I hope people read it and abide by the warnings issued against slanderers.

Omar

EZ
21-08-03, 02:25 PM
THE TONGUE

by Young Muslims UK

Pick your teeth!

It's one of the greatest sins and yet it's something we do day after day. Sometimes we don't even realize it. You're just chatting away with your friends and you begin to talk about somebody else. Our whole lives are based around 'Home and Away' and 'Neighbors', soaps based on lying, backbiting and cheating. But look at what the Prophet (saw) said about it:

The Prophet (saw) was sitting with his companions one day and one of them was speaking badly about someone who wasn't there. As the man got up to leave the Prophet (saw) said to him: "Pick your teeth!" "But I haven't eaten anything", the man protested. "No", the Prophet (saw) said "you have eaten the flesh of your dead brother!"

As Allah tells us in the Qur'an: "Would any of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? No, you would hate it." [al-Qur'an 49:12]

But what if it's true?

The Prophet (saw) told us, "Backbiting is to say something about someone they wouldn't like said about them ... If what bad you said about them is true, then you have backbitten and if it is false then you have slandered them!" [Muslim]

If you're still not convinced of how big a sin backbiting really is, then look at the punishment Allah has in store for the backbiters. The Prophet (saw) described: "On the night of Miraaj (the Prophet's ascension to heaven), I passed by some people who had metal hooks in their hands and were clawing at their faces and their necks with them. I asked Jibraeel 'Who were these people?' He said 'These are the people who eat the flesh of human beings and disgrace them' " [Abu Dawud].

This is how big of a sin backbiting is looked upon and yet we continue to backbite without a second thought, next time you lie, talk about somebody, remember Allah (swt) and the Prophet (saw) and put them in front of you before you speak.

Just having a laugh!

May be we think it's all right to take the mick out of someone so long as we say it to their face. We'll make fun of the way someone talks, walks, or how they look. Allah warns us against such behavior:

"O you who believe, let not some men laugh at others, it may be the that they are better than you. Nor let some women laugh at others it may be that they are better than you. Nor abuse each other, nor be sarcastic to each other by using offensive nicknames..." [al-Qur'an 49:11]

Don't forget that Allah made us the way we are, so how can you even think of making fun of his creation?

Cool to swear?

Listen to yourself and to your friends speaking one day - nearly every sentence will have a swear word in it, thinking it's cool and macho to swear, copying the idols of TV and the cinema. Is it really 'cool' to swear? The Hellfire is far from being cool. People will wish they were cool then rather than being cool in this world. Remember! That every time you speak , an angel writes down what you say, and that one day you will have to answer for every single word you ever uttered. So if you swear at someone then it's written down as a sin against you. You're only harming yourself. The Prophet (saw) said that "abusing a Muslim is a sin and fighting with him is disbelief" [Muslim].

But sometimes you just have to swear!

We've all been there - you're just so angry with somebody and the only way you can express yourself, is to swear at them. The solution? Don't get angry in the first place. A man came to the Prophet (saw) one day and said "Advise me". The Prophet (saw) said "Don't become angry. Don't become angry. Don't become angry... when one of you gets angry while he is standing up, he should sit down. Then anger will leave him, and if not then he should lie down" [Ahmad].

So let us follow this beautiful advice of the Prophet (saw) and remember that anger is from Shaytan. If someone angers you or swears at you then don't harm yourself by doing the same but respond in a better way as Allah says in the Qur'an "Repel evil with what is better. Then he who was your worst enemy will become your best friend." [al-Qur'an 41:33]

It wasn't me who said it!

How often do we say such a phrase or say that "I was only joking". We treat lies as being trivial. However we are told that Allah's messenger did not hate anything more than lying [Ahmed]. The Prophet (saw) was once asked "Can a Muslim be a coward?" He (saw) replied "Yes". He was then asked "Can a Muslim be a miser?" and the reply was "Yes". The Prophet (saw) was again asked "Can a Muslim be a liar?" The Prophet (saw) replied "No! A Muslim can never be a liar".

Furthermore, he said "Truth leads to virtue and virtue leads to paradise... Lying leads to wickedness and wickedness leads to the hellfire" [Bukhari]. As we know that one lie leads to another ten lies which lead to bad actions. Remember you can lie and think that you have got away with it but on the day of Judgment your hands, tongue and feet will bear testimony against you and tell the truth.

But it's only words!

One day, one of the Companions asked the Prophet (saw): "O Messenger of Allah, will we be called to account for what we say?" He replied "May you be lost to your mother! People will be thrown, faces down into the hellfire, only on account to what their tongues said!" [Tirmidhi]

Indeed the tongue controls the rest of your body. A well controlled tongue will keep us within Islam but a loose tongue will destroy us. The Prophet (saw) said: "When a person gets up in the morning, all the parts of his body make a plea to his tongue saying 'Fear Allah regarding us, because we follow you. If you are right then we shall also be right , and if you are wrong then we shall also be wrong'." [Tirmidhi]

Instead of swearing, lying and engaging in useless talk we can use our tongues in better ways and what better than telling people about Islam. Allah says: "Who is better in speech than one who calls (people) to Allah and works righteousness and says I am one of those who bow down in Islam" [al-Qur'an 41:33]

Your tongue can save you!

Indeed if you control your tongue and speak good then paradise can be yours. The Prophet (saw) said: "Whoever can guarantee me two things I can guarantee them Paradise". The companions asked "What, O Messenger of Allah?" He replied: "What is between his jaws (his tongue) and his legs (private parts)" [Bukhari].

I must be doomed!

"I have lied, backbitten people, and swear all the time. I must be going to hell!"

No! Allah (swt) tells us in the Qur'an: "O my servants who have wronged themselves, never despair of the mercy of Allah - for truly He forgives all sins. He is the Forgiving, the Merciful." [al-Qur'an 39:53]

So if you really repent and turn back to Allah and promise not to commit the sin again then truly Allah's promise is true and He will forgive you. If you've backbitten someone - go and tell the person whom you backbitten and apologize sincerely and ask them to forgive you. But if you think that the situation will get worse then turn back to Allah sincerely begging for his forgiveness then to make up for what you said, go around and talk good of him.

The best example

As we know that the best person to have ever lived is the Prophet Muhammad (saw) and he is the best of example for mankind. If we follow him we can never go wrong. Aisha (ra), the Prophet's wife, described the Prophet's conduct as follows "He was neither an obscene talker nor a user of bad words. He did not shout nor did he repay evil with evil. He used to forgive people and overlook their sins" [Tirmidhi].

Final word of advice

A beautiful saying of the Prophet (saw) that will ensure the protection of our tongue. The Messenger of Allah (saw) said

"Whoever believes in Allah and the Last day, LET HIM EITHER SPEAK GOOD OR KEEP SILENT!" [Agreed upon]