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cynosure__
21-08-08, 05:11 PM
I went to a party Mom,
I remembered what you said.
You told me not to drink, Mom,
So I drank soda instead.


I really felt proud inside, Mom,
The way you said I would.
I didn't drink and drive, Mom,
Even though the others said I should.


I know I did the right thing, Mom,
I know you are always right.
Now the party is finally ending, Mom,
As everyone is driving out of sight.


As I got into my car, Mom,
I knew I'd get home in one piece.
Because of the way you raised me,
So responsible and sweet.


I started to drive away, Mom,
But as I pulled out into the road,
The other car didn't see me, Mom,
And hit me like a load.


As I lay there on the pavement, Mom,
I hear the policeman say,
"The other guy is drunk," Mom,
And now I'm the one who will pay.


I'm lying here dying, Mom....
I wish you'd get here soon.
How could this happen to me, Mom?
My life just burst like a balloon.


There is blood all around me, Mom,
And most of it is mine.
I hear the medic say, Mom,
I'll die in a short time.


I just wanted to tell you, Mom,
I swear I didn't drink.
It was the others, Mom.
The others didn't think.


He was probably at the same party as I.
The only difference is, he drank
And I will die.


Why do people drink, Mom ?
It can ruin your whole life.
I'm feeling sharp pains now.
Pains just like a knife.


The guy who hit me is walking, Mom,
And I don't think it's fair.
I'm lying here dying
And all he can do is stare.


Tell my brother not to cry, Mom.
Tell Daddy to be brave.
And when I go to heaven, Mom,
Put "Daddy's Girl" on my grave.


Someone should have told him, Mom ,
Not to drink and drive.
If only they had told him, Mom,
I would still be alive.


My breath is getting shorter, Mom.
I'm becoming very scared.
Please don't cry for me, Mom.
When I needed you, you were always there.


I have one last question, Mom.
Before I say good bye.
I didn't drink and drive,
So why am I the one to die?

Love&Peace
22-08-08, 09:57 AM
:(:( Good poem

cynosure__
22-08-08, 11:32 AM
thanks love and peace

Shawarmalover
22-08-08, 09:08 PM
Brilliant

lilmissq
22-08-08, 09:48 PM
a touching poem....a very tru peom too!:o

ya akhi
22-08-08, 11:11 PM
woah brought tear drops to my eye

cynosure__
23-08-08, 09:30 AM
thanks all of you
it is really very touchy

Love&Peace
23-08-08, 10:31 AM
thanks all of you
it is really very touchy

Did u write it?
good 1.

cynosure__
23-08-08, 06:42 PM
Nope i didn't

Safiya
23-08-08, 07:35 PM
:salams

Ohhh... That was so sad.

:(

in_exile
23-08-08, 08:05 PM
what was she doing at a party with boys and with alcohol in the first place??

Safiya
23-08-08, 09:05 PM
what was she doing at a party with boys and with alcohol in the first place??

:salams

Who said she is a Muslim?..

muslim_girl94
26-08-08, 09:58 AM
heart touching poem

cynosure__
26-08-08, 10:42 AM
Tahnx muslim girl 94

Treasured Soul
26-08-08, 12:25 PM
sad :( but soo true :(:(

cynosure__
27-08-08, 02:57 PM
Thanx for ur comment

qatzelok
27-08-08, 05:26 PM
As I lay there on the pavement, Mom,
I hear the policeman say,
"The other guy is drunk," Mom,
And now I'm the one who will pay.

cynosure, in something like 70% of fatal accidents, alcohol is NOT A FACTOR. Both drivers are completely sober.

Cars are deadly and murderous on their own. Blaming alcohol just lets car companies - and a society built around empty materialism - off the hook.

cynosure__
27-08-08, 06:57 PM
but here it seems the other boy is drunk

qatzelok
27-08-08, 10:29 PM
But the other boy is NOT DRUNK in 70% of fatal car accidents.

So your poem distorts this reality by implying that alcohol causes car accidents, when in reality it is cars that cause them.

ugh
28-08-08, 01:20 AM
qatzelok does that make the other 30% of fatal car crashes where alcohol is involved excusable then?

if your statics are correct then think 3 out of every 10 fatal car crashes may not have happened

.... so someone's daughter or father or
son may have been saved from such a death

and thank you
cynosure_
haven't read this poem for years but it is very :(

qatzelok
28-08-08, 04:43 AM
To emphasize that alcohol was involved in a fictional car accident just makes it seem like cars are otherwise safe.

Mainstream media does this all the time. Every time a family dies in a minvan, the article will mention whether or not alcohol was a factor, insinuating that it always is.

If it DEFINITELY ISN'T a factor in 70% of fatal accidents, then stop perverting reality by indulging in some kind of fantasy world where only very, very drunk people get killed by cars.

Cars are death. Don't protect them from bad publicity by blaming their violence on other poisons. Cars are poison on their own.

cynosure__
28-08-08, 03:26 PM
qatzelok does that make the other 30% of fatal car crashes where alcohol is involved excusable then?

if your statics are correct then think 3 out of every 10 fatal car crashes may not have happened

.... so someone's daughter or father or
son may have been saved from such a death

and thank you
cynosure_
haven't read this poem for years but it is very :(



thnx ugh

qatzelok
29-08-08, 06:01 AM
I really liked the poem, its structure and the words you carefully chose, cyanosure.

But to let the car get off free, and to suggest that car accidents ONLY HAPPEN TO DRUNK PEOPLE is very irresponsible.

In a way, you are playing the same role as American media. By emphasizing that certain violent acts are done by Moslems, American media suggests that they are always to blame. This means that Americans don't blame the other important culprits that are hurting their society.

Likewise, by emphasizing alcohol as the villain in this car-accident poem, the car industry and the empty materialism that keeps it going... are made to look as innocent as the poor girl who gets killed.

Do you like cars? Do you think they are a nice, useful thing?