Looking for a ..

[LondonBro12]

As Salaam Alaikum,

I have a brother who is looking for a wife and has employed many different methods but none of them have really been effective so I thought I'd give this a shot.

Anyway, he is a pakistani brother who is almost 21 and studies in one of the london universities. He is 5'8, fair skin and has been called good looking MashAllah, he has an athletic build.

He is looking for a wife who is between 18-23 who is mindful of her religion, preferably has an interest in tasawwuf and looking to settle down soon.

[Milly]

assalamualikum

are u sure this brother isnt u? lol

sorry couldnt help it!

ok so it is nice u are concerned about this brother but i dont think that this is the correct way to go about things, i mean, are you expecting sisters to pm u with their details and hoping for a match? i dont think sisters on ummah are that forward (correct me if im mistaken).

[LondonBro12]

Thanks for the reply.
Hehe.

You have a point, but I guess one never knows where one will find the other half. You just keep your duty to Allah and utilise the means at your disposal and hope for the best.

Islamically there is nothing wrong with this so I do not see why it isn't the correct way, unless you can provide some shari evidience?

[Omar Mukhtar]

Walakumsalaam

this is not a matrimonial site, there are sites for that sign up on one of them and put his profile der.

[Milly]

from ur cheeky, evil grin - i take it, it is for you? - not important right now.

anyway well it depends how you take it further from now onwards;

how are u expecting to steer this? remember contact with sisters will be haram, unless you are aiming your post at brothers who may have a sister in mind?

im not sure what ur intentions are...

i am not disregarding ur efforts, nor am i deeming it unislamic (yet), just wondering how these things work and the success rate (if any) - please comment those who have been in similar situation.

[PK Aali]

lol the guy needs to find a wife leave the bechaara alone lol

[LondonBro12]

Thanks for the replies.

Walakumsalaam

this is not a matrimonial site, there are sites for that sign up on one of them and put his profile der.I think that is quite obvious. This does not need to be a marriage website in order for one to find a spouse.


from ur cheeky, evil grin - i take it, it is for you? - not important right now.

anyway well it depends how you take it further from now onwards;

how are u expecting to steer this? remember contact with sisters will be haram, unless you are aiming your post at brothers who may have a sister in mind?

im not sure what ur intentions are...

i am not disregarding ur efforts, nor am i deeming it unislamic (yet), just wondering how these things work and the success rate (if any) - please comment those who have been in similar situation.I know of several people who found spouses on forums. I admire your concern. If a sister is interested I will ask some questions, if her answers are satisfying then I will get her wali's details and take it from there.

[Milly]

excuse my negativity but i think sisters will be reluctant to make contact (i dont know, prove me wrong).

i am an old fashioned typa gal and i think these things are best left to our respected elders, i.e. parents, guardians, imams...etc etc. to introduce us to prospective spouses.

im sure people got married before the invention of the world wide web and other such mediums which have recently been widely used for such matters.

[~Warda~]

excuse my negativity but i think sisters will be reluctant to make contact (i dont know, prove me wrong).

i am an old fashioned typa gal and i think these things are best left to our respected elders, i.e. parents, guardians, imams...etc etc. to introduce us to prospective spouses.

im sure people got married before the invention of the world wide web and other such mediums which have recently been widely used for such matters.

I agree with Milly.
Why dont u try going to ur local mosque and tell the local imam that youre looking to get married...Insha-Allah you should get a good response from there :up:

[LondonBro12]

Thats ok, its not the end of the world. I thought I'd try it, if nothing happens then no problem.

[MMS]

have you tried your university isoc

[LondonBro12]

have you tried your university isoc
Not really liking any of the sisters in the Isoc. If any other Isoc reps/members etc around maybe they can drop me a message and we can see what can be done.

[LondonBro12]

Aren't they salafis? Not that I have a problem with them.

[MMS]

err yeh, i think most of them are, but then again most isoc peeps are these days....
try GKT isoc

[LondonBro12]

GKT, aren't they also salafi?

[Hiking]

err yeh, i think most of them are, but then again most isoc peeps are these days....
try GKT isoc

what's GKT?

[MMS]

what's GKT?
Kings

GKT, aren't they also salafi?




naa i dont think a lot of them are because you can tell by the speakers they invite

also i dont think Imperial are

[Kubs]

:rotfl:

[LondonBro12]

Thank you brother MMS.

Do you have contact with the ameer/ameerah of these isocs (emails etc)?

[MMS]

Thank you brother MMS.

Do you have contact with the ameer/ameerah of these isocs (emails etc)?

http://www.gktisoc.com/Contact/

http://www.union.ic.ac.uk/scc/islamic/test2/Contact.php

sister MMS :smack:

[RaNdOm]

:salams

yeh mashaAllah tabarakAllah they got the pick of the bunch there :up:

[Kubs]

:salams

yeh mashaAllah tabarakAllah they got the pick of the bunch there :up:

Not you as well :smack: People, stop advertising QM ISOC for marriage stuff :outta:

[ajnabee]

Not you as well :smack: People, stop advertising QM ISOC for marriage stuff :outta:


yeah but we gotta get u married off somehow innit? lol :outta:

[Joha]

hehe, if you're going to divide isocs by 'salafi' or 'sufi' you're in trouble!

you're gonna get a slap from at least one of those isocs you listed :p

[Kubs]

yeah but we gotta get u married off somehow innit? lol :outta:

:eek::eek:

[dudette]

Not you as well :smack: People, stop advertising QM ISOC for marriage stuff :outta:

:rotfl:

[Milly]

Thats ok, its not the end of the world. I thought I'd try it, if nothing happens then no problem.

ok so any luck yet bro?

c'mon, u must have some takers.

[XRUHYX]

Why is everyone mocking the brother? If he is meant to find somebody through then he will and it's the will of Allah :Swt: and vice versa.

[Milly]

noone is mocking him, were just having a joke.

[Ur sis in Islam]

have you tried shaddi.com, or any of these matrimonal sites??:P you never know you could find your other half through there!

[Enigma Dreamer]

There are many matrimonial sites, ummah is surely not one; go and look for them.

[LondonBro12]

ok so any luck yet bro?

c'mon, u must have some takers.Not yet, lol. I think its because most sisters dislike us brothers who are into tasawwuf as I have experienced in the past. But one cannot help but admire their passion for what they believe in.

Why is everyone mocking the brother? If he is meant to find somebody through then he will and it's the will of Allah and vice versa.It's ok sister. Nothing wrong with alittle light heartedness. If someone does intend to mock then Allah is the best of Judgers.

http://www.gktisoc.com/Contact/

http://www.union.ic.ac.uk/scc/islamic/test2/Contact.php

sister MMS Ah, I thought you knew the Isoc members of these societies.. That would have been better but thank you none the less sister MMS.

[MMS]

sorry i don't know them personally
maybe you could go to events like talks and stuff where there are speakers of your choice, obviously the sisters attending will be on the same wavelength as you and ask the brothers at the events if they know any sisters looking to get married or ask the shaykhs themselves if they know of any sisters looking to get married

[Abu Muslim]

lol I dont even have to have read the deleted comment to know MMS said QM ISOC was good for marriage, someones bitter they didnt go there..*sticky tongue out emoticon thingy*

And whats with the QM is salafi? They're Muslims..what you looking for?

[Eemaan]

lol I dont even have to have read the deleted comment to know MMS said QM ISOC was good for marriage, someones bitter they didnt go there..*sticky tongue out emoticon thingy*

And whats with the QM is salafi? They're Muslims..what you looking for?


do you have salafi sensitivity syndrome :smack:

[LondonBro12]

Dont such brothers usually get brushed away as perverts(the ones asking around for hijabis)? Tbh I don't usually go to such events away, they attract to much attention.

[RaNdOm]

Dont such brothers usually get brushed away as perverts(the ones asking around for hijabis)? Tbh I don't usually go to such events away, they attract to much attention.

:salams

LOL

ehem

anyway...dont u have any sisters that can ask her friends inshaAllah?

but all i can advise is keep away from haram and keep ur duty to Allah swt and inshaAllah the perfect wife for u is just beyond the horizon

[Abu Muslim]

do you have salafi sensitivity syndrome :smack:

http://www.funnyforumpics.com/forums/i-see-what-you-did-there/1/i_see_what_you_did_there.jpg

Nah but I got a sore thumb, does that help?

[UkhtAlMuslimeen]

:salams
yeah but we gotta get u married off somehow innit? lol :outta:
married off somehow...:rotfl:
awww...i think kubs would prefer to settle for the average turkish dude :rolleyes:

and whats with this whole salafi-QM suff... unnecessary labelling especially if you dont actually go there.

[muslima_89]

'average' turkish dude Ha!

Kubs shes been surrounded my non-turks all her life :O

Kubs how you taking that statement? you racist so and so?

:P

[Kubs]

No comment :eek3:

[muslima_89]

Speak child, Speak

[UkhtAlMuslimeen]

'average' turkish dude Ha!

Kubs shes been surrounded my non-turks all her life :O

Kubs how you taking that statement? you racist so and so?

:P

No comment :eek3:
lol!....im soooo right!

Speak child, Speak

......please the silence is beautiful. we dont get much of it when kubs is around.

[muslima_89]

I beg to differ, You are so Wrong, so out of bandwidth

P.s- Kubra loud? nooo that cant be true, thats like having butter on toast! :O

:P

[UkhtAlMuslimeen]

ahhhh.... the silence :)

[Kubs]

Ladies....yet again we have drifted away from the original topic :rolleyes: I know I'm an important individual...the highlight of your life......but I think we should take this conversation elsewhere. Ciao! :rolleyes:

As for the original poster - Bro....if you want to get married...and if you are serious....then speak to your parents. You attend uni....so you are still young...and thus you have time. Don't worry.

[UkhtAlMuslimeen]

Ladies....yet again we have drifted away from the original topic :rolleyes: I know I'm an important individual...the highlight of your life......but I think we should take this conversation elsewhere. Ciao! :rolleyes:

As for the original poster - Bro....if you want to get married...and if you are serious....then speak to your parents. You attend uni....so you are still young...and thus you have time. Don't worry.
yep...great advise :up:
before you start getting your hopes too high. highlight of my life :rofl1: ...like you said, we should take this conversation elsewhere.
....and the silence has been broken! :rolleyes:

[muslima_89]

muslima orders, kubs obeys

[LondonBro12]

Why is everyone picking on sister kubs?

As for the original poster - Bro....if you want to get married...and if you are serious....then speak to your parents. You attend uni....so you are still young...and thus you have time. Don't worry.Thanks for the reply. Don't worry, its not a matter of urgency.
I don't think my parents know what kind of sister I seek so I have to take the burden onto my own shoulders.

[PK Aali]

Stop it. All of you. This brother looks like he is serious, so please, if you don't have anything to say that can help him. Keep QUIET.

[Anikaa]

No offence, but i have to say LOL @ the preferrable interest in "tasawuf"...

[Astraeus]

I know of several people who found spouses on forums. I admire your concern. If a sister is interested I will ask some questions, if her answers are satisfying then I will get her wali's details and take it from there.
Akhi...the way you are going about this right now, is what one would expect to find on a matrimonial site or in personal ads. If you want a sister to notice you, or your brother, on an Islamic forum, then just reply to posts, create posts, etc...Let the sisters get to see your religious side. Your description of yourself, or your brother, whoever, makes no mention of Islam.
Anyway, he is a pakistani brother who is almost 21 and studies in one of the london universities. He is 5'8, fair skin and has been called good looking MashAllah, he has an athletic build.

You mention religion for the sister but not for yourself.

The Prophet :saw: stated: "A woman is married for four reasons: for her property, her status, her beauty and her Religion; so try to get the pious one that you may be blessed." Basically, if we brothers marry for other than religious piety, our marriages are bound to fall into misery.

Summary: If you want to place a personal ad, go to a personals site. If you want to find a wife on a forum, become an active member of the forum, make posts, and leave it up to the will of Allah (SWT).

[Zesty]

Akhi...the way you are going about this right now, is what one would expect to find on a matrimonial site or in personal ads. If you want a sister to notice you, or your brother, on an Islamic forum, then just reply to posts, create posts, etc...Let the sisters get to see your religious side. Your description of yourself, or your brother, whoever, makes no mention of Islam.

You mention religion for the sister but not for yourself.

The Prophet :saw: stated: "A woman is married for four reasons: for her property, her status, her beauty and her Religion; so try to get the pious one that you may be blessed." Basically, if we brothers marry for other than religious piety, our marriages are bound to fall into misery.

Summary: If you want to place a personal ad, go to a personals site. If you want to find a wife on a forum, become an active member of the forum, make posts, and leave it up to the will of Allah (SWT).

But like... isnt he now going to try extra hard or maybe try and come across as something he may not be? :o dont get me wrong. Alhamdullilah he may very well be a great pious, excellent brother :up: but nowww... if he posts, hes gona always be thinking, "am i saying the right thing maybe in order for some loopey lass on the forum to fallll for meh" :D :hidban:

geddit?

[Milly]

Summary: If you want to place a personal ad, gotoa personals site. If you want to find a wife on a forum, become an active member of the forum, make posts, and leave it up to the will of Allah (SWT).[/QUOTE]

assalamualikum,

im afraid im going to have to disagree brother.
surely you are condoning exactly what u are condemning. u say the brother should not use this as a personal site but then by becoming an active member what is he doing? you are encouraging him to display personal info about himself, namely his PERSONality - is this not like an advert in itself, strategically built over a certain period of time, aiming to attract and reel in members of the opposite gender.
i think we have to be very careful here, u dont want to find urself in a situation where u are trying to 'impress' others all in the name of Islam - we need to get our priorities right! why are we really here?

correct me if im mistaken but isnt ummah all about learning the deen and for like minded muslims to be able to support each other, i did not realise it was a means of meeting people (and flirting) astagfirullah.

sorry if my views are strong and/ or i have caused any offence.

[SalafUsSalih]

Actually the Isocs are on the Qur'an and Sunnah. However the individuals in the Isocs follow a variety. Those that are Salafe are just followers of the Sunnah (They take from all 4 madhabs) and not restrict themselves to one as they believe that all 4 Imams were from the Salaf therefore why regard one and disregard the other, Basically taking what is Sahih in them All.

The isoc Individuals, some are followers of Madhabs I.e. Imam Abu Hanifa, Imam Shafie, Imam Malik, Imam Ahmed Ibn Hambal or Salfes who take from all of them.

There are also Shias, Sufis...non that i have seen, they are probably around but just don't come into the prayer room.

May Allah ta'la make your search easy Ameen

[Astraeus]

But like... isnt he now going to try extra hard or maybe try and come across as something he may not be? :o dont get me wrong. Alhamdullilah he may very well be a great pious, excellent brother :up: but nowww... if he posts, hes gona always be thinking, "am i saying the right thing maybe in order for some loopey lass on the forum to fallll for meh" :D :hidban:

geddit?
:salams

Point well taken ukhtee. It certainly was not my intention to set up possible deception for the sisters. The brother sounds like he is trying to follow the way of the sunnah, except for wanting sisters to reply directly to him regarding marriage.


assalamualikum,

im afraid im going to have to disagree brother.
surely you are condoning exactly what u are condemning. u say the brother should not use this as a personal site but then by becoming an active member what is he doing? you are encouraging him to display personal info about himself, namely his PERSONality - is this not like an advert in itself, strategically built over a certain period of time, aiming to attract and reel in members of the opposite gender.
i think we have to be very careful here, u dont want to find urself in a situation where u are trying to 'impress' others all in the name of Islam - we need to get our priorities right! why are we really here?

correct me if im mistaken but isnt ummah all about learning the deen and for like minded muslims to be able to support each other, i did not realise it was a means of meeting people (and flirting) astagfirullah.

sorry if my views are strong and/ or i have caused any offence.
:salams Ukhtee

No offense taken, and your point is well taken, too.

As I stated above, it was not my intention to create deception. My point was if the brother was just being himself sisters might take notice.

My apologies for not being clearer. :o

[LondonBro12]

Thanks for the replies brothers & sisters.

Ateraeus, you are right, I did not make any mention of my own religious commitments. I am deeply commited to my religion and have been so for several years. I do have a beard and aim to fulfil my duty to Allah to the best of my ability. I am a very mature individual. I am inclined towards tassawuf and would like a wife with whom I can walk this path with. I did browse some of these marriage sites but they are really dodgy, in that the sisters have some really strange requests and most consider me of ahl bidah.. Its not easy on the pocket either.

As for my enviroment, it has become very difficult to find a sister who is firm on the shariah of Allah and seeking to purify the nafs. Most usually go for one or the other. It is very disheartening to see people mock the religion of Allah by saying they follow it but doing the complete opposite openly even though they appear as individuals who adhere to Islam properly. Initially I was hoping it was only in my area but clearly it isn't.

I wasn't too eager to try this method but I thought I'd give it a shot and see what happens.

[Zesty]

:salams

Point well taken ukhtee. It certainly was not my intention to set up possible deception for the sisters. The brother sounds like he is trying to follow the way of the sunnah, except for wanting sisters to reply directly to him regarding marriage.



Wa-alaikum salaan wr wb :)

LOL sorry Akhi, i didnt mean to come across like i was having a go at you or reprimanding you or anything. It was meant to be said in jest but with a point :o it was also no dig at london bro as i truly believe that he seems sincere in his search for a wife Alhamdullilah.
Im not questioning his level of Taqwa or judging him in any way- that is only upto Allah and He knows best :) but JazakAllah Khair for your post. You were clear enough- i guess i was just being a tad cheeky! lol

Londonbro12- I actually think youre being quite genuine in your search for a spouse. The thing is- im not sure this is entirely the right or best way. Alhamdullilah there really are some amazing sisters on this forum- i just dont know how forward they are willing to be in such a matter. Have you tried other alternative routes? I havent read through the entire thread so i dont know if youve mentioned anything else.

How about getting friends to ask around- inshaAllah if i can think of any of my female friends who are looking to get married i will let you know. I pray that Allah (swt) guides you to a pious and loving muslimah; someone you can fulfill your rights and duties towards and someone who you can inshaAllah attain Jannah with :inlove: ! Ameen :)

[MMS]

Thanks for the replies brothers & sisters.

Ateraeus, you are right, I did not make any mention of my own religious commitments. I am deeply commited to my religion and have been so for several years. I do have a beard and aim to fulfil my duty to Allah to the best of my ability. I am a very mature individual. I am inclined towards tassawuf and would like a wife with whom I can walk this path with. I did browse some of these marriage sites but they are really dodgy, in that the sisters have some really strange requests and most consider me of ahl bidah.. Its not easy on the pocket either.

As for my enviroment, it has become very difficult to find a sister who is firm on the shariah of Allah and seeking to purify the nafs. Most usually go for one or the other. It is very disheartening to see people mock the religion of Allah by saying they follow it but doing the complete opposite openly even though they appear as individuals who adhere to Islam properly. Initially I was hoping it was only in my area but clearly it isn't.

I wasn't too eager to try this method but I thought I'd give it a shot and see what happens.

seriously get in touch with shaykhs that you trust, lots of sisters go to these shaykhs aswell because they are in the same position as you, inshaAllah they can help you out :up:

[muslimma]

He is looking for a wife who is between 18-23 who is mindful of her religion, preferably has an interest in tasawwuf and looking to settle down soon.

:start:

wots tasawwuf? :o

[LondonBro12]

JazakAllah Khayr Zesty, thank you for your kind words. It looks like people are equipping me with the tools but not the prize itself, lol.

MMS, MashaAllah you are being very helpful, Allah reward you! The shuyukh I know don't live in the UK, do you know of any shaykhs in London?

[muslimma]

JazakAllah Khayr Zesty, thank you for your kind words. It looks like people are equipping me with the tools but not the prize itself, lol.

MMS, MashaAllah you are being very helpful, Allah reward you! The shuyukh I know don't live in the UK, do you know of any shaykhs in London?

:start:

:eek:

:rotfl:

[LondonBro12]

:start:

wots tasawwuf? :o
Here is a good read: http://www.tasawwuf.org/basics/what_tasawwuf.htm

[MMS]

JazakAllah Khayr Zesty, thank you for your kind words. It looks like people are equipping me with the tools but not the prize itself, lol.

MMS, MashaAllah you are being very helpful, Allah reward you! The shuyukh I know don't live in the UK, do you know of any shaykhs in London?

im not sure what kind of tasawwuf ur into since it means different things to different people so i can't help you there, but if you trust scholars abroad ask them for contacts of london or Uk shaykhs, they will know of them iA

[LondonBro12]

im not sure what kind of tasawwuf ur into since it means different things to different people so i can't help you there, but if you trust scholars abroad ask them for contacts of london or Uk shaykhs, they will know of them iAWell, there are two catagories. The first simply purify themselves and the second talk about indepth aqeeda which not many people understand. Both catagories adhere to the first cat. whereas not everyone adheres to the second catagory. Some reject it altogether. I am into both.

[Astraeus]

It looks like people are equipping me with the tools but not the prize itself, lol.
Akhi...I hope you will allow me to share with you my experience since I am basically twice as old as you: The harder someone tries to find a spouse, the less likely it will happen. When you just go about life as it comes, this is when Allah (SWT) brings an unexpected blessing into your life.

[UkhtAlMuslimeen]

Akhi...I hope you will allow me to share with you my experience since I am basically twice as old as you: The harder someone tries to find a spouse, the less likely it will happen. When you just go about life as it comes, this is when Allah (SWT) brings an unexpected blessing into your life.
:salams
this is sooo true. the best thing a person can do is try and better themselves in there deen. khair inshaAllah, the Qadr of Allah is soo amazing....
just be patient and you'll start seeing all these blessings from Allah you could never imagine!

[Reema]

Akhi...I hope you will allow me to share with you my experience since I am basically twice as old as you: The harder someone tries to find a spouse, the less likely it will happen. When you just go about life as it comes, this is when Allah (SWT) brings an unexpected blessing into your life.

I agree 100%, I delayed and waited long enough for the right person and one day he just came along and I couldnt be happier with him.

[PK Aali]

got a girl yet lol