Homosexual ? Muslim ? Gay muslims marrying Lesbian muslims

[Halim1814]

Hello all ...

I am a 21 year old student living in Cairo, Egypt. I have struggled all my life with homosexuality. I can't explain the pain homosexuality causes to normal people, but any homosexual would know what am talking about.
I even tried psychotherapy recently .. didn't work. I just want to clarify that I dont practice homosexuality, i mean i dont have sex with other men, elhamdulillah, but I have sexual feelings towards men and elhamdulillah Allah has helped in controlling them, and never acting upon them.
However, I feel that I can't change my sexual orientation, it is a part of me that can't just be changed.
Imagine someone asks you to change your sexual preferences, how hard do you think it would be ? This is what I go through ...
So i thought to myself, wouldnt it be easier to marry a lesbian, who knows what I am going through, and knows how i feel, and wants love, children and a happy life ?

[`asiya]

u must continue to strive against these un-natural whispers of shaitan, and marrying a woman who is like that will not help anything at all, she will not want a man to touch her let alone bear his children. if u are a muslim, then continue to repent to Allah ta ala and ask Allah to protect u from the whispers of shaitan and take these evil thoughts from your mind.

you can change your sexual orientation just as u convinced yourself to be attracted to men, you can train your mind to un convince itself too insha Allah keep praying to Allah ta ala, dont ever act on these thoughts and ask Allah to cure u from such things. It maybe hard, but this is your test now and u should do all u can to pass it so that insha Allah al jannah will be your abode. also stay away from anyone who is also like that, if u have any homosexual freinds or lesbian freinds, and if you go to places where these types of people are they will only seek to lead you further astray, so stay well away from such people.

[`asiya]

He wants to repent from homosexuality and needs help

http://www.islam-qa.com/index.php?ref=27176&ln=eng


He is homosexual and is afraid to get married

http://www.islam-qa.com/index.php?ref=101169&ln=eng&txt=homosexuality

Tawbah (repentance) from homosexuality

http://www.islam-qa.com/index.php?ref=35&ln=eng

Why does Islam forbid lesbianism and homosexuality?

http://www.islam-qa.com/index.php?ref=10050&ln=eng

Can she marry someone who practices homosexuality?

http://www.islam-qa.com/index.php?ref=13707&ln=eng&txt=homosexuality

Muslim attitude towards the sin of homosexuality

http://www.islam-qa.com/index.php?ref=2104&ln=eng

The punishment for homosexuality

http://www.islam-qa.com/index.php?ref=38622&ln=eng

The punishment for lesbianism

http://www.islam-qa.com/index.php?ref=21058&ln=eng

[Halim1814]

Dear asiya,
This is a life long test, know what I mean ?
It is somthing I have been trying to stop since I was 15. I am not going to tell you that I was born this way, because I know I wasn't. Allah wouldn't do that to anyone, and I thank God that I understand that, unlike other homosexuals who just give up to their desires ...
The woman would be a homosexual too, so there will be a connection between us. mmm, you can't and will never understand this unless you are/were a homosexual. I wouldn't mind marrying a lesbian woman who understand that Suhaaq ( Lesbianism ) is haraam, and I wouldn't feel bad about her raising my kids.
We are normal people, it is just we have this addiction that some of us, can;t get over.
Believe me brothers and sisters, I tried praying, Dua, therapy, crying to God, and it just didnt work for me.
One more thing, i didnt CONVINCE myself that i am attracted to men. No one would ever choose to do that.
It is a life long Jihad, know what I mean ?

[Halim1814]

One more thing. Allah doesnt say its Haraam to be a homosexual, To have the thoughts of a homosexual. Allah punishes us if we practice homosexuality ... and elhadulillah, I don't.

[`asiya]

One more thing. Allah doesnt say its Haraam to be a homosexual, To have the thoughts of a homosexual. Allah punishes us if we practice homosexuality ... and elhadulillah, I don't.

alhamdulillah you have prevented yourself from doing such sins this far, please read the links i posted above for you it gives the daleel from the Quran and sahih sunnah about such things. dont let shaitan defeat you, he knows he is going to eternal hellfire and wishes to lead all of us there with him, this is the promise of shaitan.

instead try to purfiy your mind and your heart from such things insha Allah, alhamdulillah you are striving to rid youself of this and may Allah assist you with that amin. keep striving dont give up but the answer is not to marry such a woman the answer is to return to your fitrah insha Allah, and then you can have a proper marriage, insha Allah and insha Allah Allah will bless u with a pious wife and many children u have to beleive with all your heart and soul that Allah ta ala can cure you of this, beleive it, know it, accept it 100% u can get through this and you will insha Allah. avoid all things that bring u close to such people and may Allah guide u and assist u with your struggle and cure you of this amin. seek knowledge of your deen insha Allah it will help u so much to busy your mind with other things.

[Halim1814]

I hope that happens some day. I will never give up inshalla ...

[Kubs]

I hope that happens some day. I will never give up inshalla ...

Mashallah brother. I admire your strength and strong imaan. Be patient Inshallah. Good things come to those who wait :)

[`asiya]

I hope that happens some day. I will never give up inshalla ...

alhamdulillah be brave, and may Allah give u strength amin, already you have won half the battle by not acting on these thoughts, and you are not trying to make excuses for it alhamdulillah, Allah will reward u for your sincere intentions to rid yourself of this insha Allah. insha Allah u will come through this dont ever give up, dont ever let shaitan defeat you, you will have a proper marriage and u will come to find a woman who you love insha Allah and she will love you, and may Allah bless you with that and beautiful pious children amin. some people are tested in other ways but this is your test and u must pass it insha Allah, be strong, stay firm, and most of all busy yourself with seeking knowledge of al Islam, and insha Allah this sitution you now find yourself in will become a distant memory one day. it will be difficult no doubt about that, but really already you have come very far alhamdulilllah. stick around the forum and insha Allah we will all help u and advise you as much as we can.

[Halim1814]

What saddens me the most is that there isn't an outlet for people like me to express themselves, and let it all out. No Sheikh or Da'ayah is talking openly about it, encouraging us to keep on fighting.
There are so many whome I represent, who feel lost, confused and helpless. It is the Quran, elhamdulillah, which keeps my faith strong, which keeps me going on.
:lailah:
To others who relate to me, who have this sickness, Allah will reward us inshalla for staying strong. I can't think of a harder test for any muslim. Allah will never forget you in the Day of Judgement. He knows what we have been through, He :Swt: knows the pain we go through everyday, fighting our urges, and spreading His message.
Stay strong, and things are gonna get easier.

[Al-Nasser]

What saddens me the most is that there isn't an outlet for people like me to express themselves, and let it all out. No Sheikh or Da'ayah is talking openly about it, encouraging us to keep on fighting.

or maybe you didn't search enough :)

here is a transcript of what Moiz Massoud said in one episode of his Ramadan show about homosexuality

http://www.moezmasoud.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=17

he is calling for tolerance and understanding toward people like you who doesn't act upon their homosexual impulses

[Medievalist]

Halim: you need to marry a normal woman and then continue striving and ALLAH Ta'ala will put the natural desire for women back into your heart. When a person gazes lustfully at a man, ALLAH Ta'ala increases his desire for men until it becomes that he likes men over women. The first step is taken by the human who looks at things that he shouldn't. If you backtrack that and marry a good normal woman and have faith in ALLAH Ta'ala then undoubtedly He will assist you and remove this addiction/malady from your heart and place back into the natural desire for woman.

[`asiya]

..

[Al-Nasser]

btw Halim......the number of hiv infections amongst gay men in Egypt is booming

which is not strange or weird.......homosexuality helped hiv growth globally (there is other reasons but homosexuality is the #1 reason)

get married....make a family and raise children.....good for the society......homosexual relations is a waste for the society and the persons involved in it

[Halim1814]

Yeah I heard that Moez Massoud speeech, but I still think it isnt addressed enough ...
Basically, muslims arent aware of the problem. When the word homosexual is mentioned anywhere, people start swearing at them and cursing them. They dont consider the feelings of muslims in pain who dont want to be the way they are ...

[Halim1814]

But thts the thing. What if i am never attracted to her sexually ? what if i cant satisfy her ?
its all very confusing. My psychiatrist, who is a muslim woman, actually advised me to engage in sexual relations with women ...
I know, I know .... she is crazy, I left her clinic once I heard her suggesting that ...
very confusing ...

[Al-Nasser]

its all very confusing. My psychiatrist, who is a muslim woman, actually advised me to engage in sexual relations with women ...

to clear any confusion or bad speculations here......this psychiatrist is not Heba Qutb...right?

[Halim1814]

mmm, No she isnt :)
I live in Egypt ... different country probably ...

[Al-Nasser]

phew!

i knew Heba Qutb would never advise something like that

if you are looking for a psychiatrist who can really help you and have great deal of sex and Islamic knowledge then go for Dr Heba Qutb.....she is brilliant and won't ever ask her patients to do anything which is unislamic

[Halim1814]

Who is Heba Qutb ? How can i get in touch with her ? does she live in Egypt ?

[Al-Nasser]

Who is Heba Qutb ? How can i get in touch with her ? does she live in Egypt ?

yes she live in Egypt....

www.egypttoday.com/article.aspx?ArticleID=2480
(don't visit the link if straightforward sexual educational terms bother you)

as for how to reach her.....i am not sure.....but if you search you will find her contact information easily inshallah

[Al-Nasser]

her official website
http://www.hebakotb.net/ar

and her contact info



Work ( office )


+2 023 30 36708



Mobile ( cellular )


+2 010 16 48560



Fax Number


+2 023 34 54123



E-Mail


ask@hebakotb.net

[Halim1814]

thanks alot nasser ...

[haque]

Bro, stay strong. Out of all the tests that Allah (swt) has made, in my opinion, homosexuality is the hardest. Insha'Allah you will rewarded with the highest station in paradise.

[abood]

Hello all ...

I am a 21 year old student living in Cairo, Egypt. I have struggled all my life with homosexuality. I can't explain the pain homosexuality causes to normal people, but any homosexual would know what am talking about.
I even tried psychotherapy recently .. didn't work. I just want to clarify that I dont practice homosexuality, i mean i dont have sex with other men, elhamdulillah, but I have sexual feelings towards men and elhamdulillah Allah has helped in controlling them, and never acting upon them.
However, I feel that I can't change my sexual orientation, it is a part of me that can't just be changed.
Imagine someone asks you to change your sexual preferences, how hard do you think it would be ? This is what I go through ...
So i thought to myself, wouldnt it be easier to marry a lesbian, who knows what I am going through, and knows how i feel, and wants love, children and a happy life ?


assalam alaikum

mashaALLAH brother...

i really became so surprised and happy that you are striving against it..

i am unable to say anything but to say mashaALLAH and pray for you..

:)

may ALLAH help you and gmay you enter jannah with sahabah and may ALLAH give you pious and beautiful wife who would give you as many children as you wish... and may ALLAH be happy with you of youy struggle through this fitnah and may ALLAH make your standard like mujahideen who fight in the battle field for ALLAH
amin


wassalam

take care and do not let your self a campanion of shaitan

fe hifz ar rahman

[Omar Mukhtar]

Get married brother to a woman.

[LastFriday]

Homosexuality is such a filthy virus. Bro firstly, I highly commend you for fighting against it! MASHA'ALLAH. Allah (swt) knows that your fighting it for His (swt) sake. He doesn't let any good go to waste. He(swt) will reward you insha'Allah :)

055.060
"Is the reward of goodness aught but goodness?"

We are all here rooting for you :) Everyone has already said everything, but I too think, you should just MARRY a normal woman. And see what happens. You cant assume and say, "what if" What if it does WORK!? What if Allah (swt) does place that original love back in your heart? What if just the sight of seeing a woman care for you so much put that attraction back in your heart? Allahu Alim, you said you tried everything else, try this... =) once again bro masha'Allah. Really, it is so amazing to see the struggles of others, Subhan'Allah. Not that i'm enjoying it or anything, just...its amazing to see how Allah (swt) tests his believers in so many different ways, and more often than not the Believers STRUGGLE and PASS! Taqwa :)

[AbuMubarak]

i dont believe the poster, i think its a hoax

[Enigma Dreamer]

Brother, don't lose hope. Struggle. You are right to point out out that this is a test but are you willing to fail? I mean if we feel so depressed and don't wanna fail in a mere school test, are you willing to fail that big test that will determine your akhira. You must struggle ad believe me, you will overcome, inshaaAllah. Bottom line is you should NEVER GIVE UP. Strive hard to give up and after giving up, repent sincerely, then marry a religious sister who can help you stay strong.

[LastFriday]

i dont believe the poster, i think its a hoax

What would HE get out of it? What will we? I dunno, u think Allah (swt) will reward us for trying to help him, even if we DON'T know his real intention? I'm willing to bet yes....then again I could be wrong :rubeyes:

[AbuMubarak]

sorry, i dont see explaining right and wrong to a sodomite as being a good deed

its a waste of time

these people know that its haram

and he is using ummah.com as some type of media to advertise his stupidity

and you guys are gullible enough to play along with it, under the guise of helping him

private message him, that would be better than exposing this forum to such filth

[.: Anna :.]

bro he has not acted on his feelings and he does not want to, so is it really correct, accurate or beneficial to call him a sodomite? I think no.

[Al-Nasser]

sorry, i dont see explaining right and wrong to a sodomite as being a good deed


how did you know he is a sodomite?

[Enigma Dreamer]

Assalaamu 'aleykum. Brothers and sisters, let us not derail the thread from its purpose of seeking help. It won't help if we post and post arguing with each other. Just my thought.

[Kubs]

sorry, i dont see explaining right and wrong to a sodomite as being a good deed

its a waste of time

these people know that its haram

and he is using ummah.com as some type of media to advertise his stupidity

and you guys are gullible enough to play along with it, under the guise of helping him

private message him, that would be better than exposing this forum to such filth

Sometimes I admire your posts....other times I'm suprised and disgusted at some of the comments you come up with. Put yourself in his position and try to think from his perspective....you can't can you..because AbuMubarak has no faults....subhanallah...rather than consoling and helping your own Muslim brother you choose to make a mockery of what he says.

Yes he does know it's haraam and Alhamdulillah he's not acting upon it....what's important is to help him and give him advice. No one is perfect.

And last but not least...yes you are a moderator....but you have your limits. Behave like a moderator. Behave like a Muslim and if you have nothing good to say..then don't say anything at all.

[AbuMubarak]

you are right, let me behave like a moderator

[Al-Nasser]

you are trying to destroy this guy or something????

want him to go to the "moderates" to take an extensive course on how to accept homosexuality as a part of Islam!???

what else should he have done other than coming to his Muslim brothers and sisters to ask them for help with the thoughts with is overpowering him and to help him with his resistance against sinning?????

what are we....a bunch of angels.....should treat him like a filthy outcast because he admitted that he had an urge for a sin which is he resisting furiously??.....never had an urge to commit a sin before Abu???

[Kubs]

you are right, let me behave like a moderator

Behaving like a decent Muslim should be your first priority....:)

I agree with Al-Nasser - Mashallah.

[Islamiyyah]

Akhi do not worry. Alhamdulillah you know its wrong and struggling to rid of your desires. This shows your Imaan. Keep striving akhi as hard as you can to rid of the feelings. It may seem hard but it is sooo possible if you really try. Allah aza wa jaal is so merciful and if He sees you are trying etc, just have patience and He will grant your du'as of getting rid of these feelings. May Allah make you sucessful. Ameen thumma ameen.

[Supernova Nebula]

sorry, i dont see explaining right and wrong to a sodomite as being a good deed

its a waste of time

these people know that its haram

and he is using ummah.com as some type of media to advertise his stupidity

and you guys are gullible enough to play along with it, under the guise of helping him

private message him, that would be better than exposing this forum to such filth

That's very arrogant coming from your mouth. you wouldnt know how Allah would test you, test your children and test you with what in the future. Try to be humble and open your mind to what other posters have to say.

[lao tzu]

I don't have any advice for you consistent with your muslim beliefs, but you have my sympathies, Halim.

[LastFriday]

sorry, i dont see explaining right and wrong to a sodomite as being a good deed

its a waste of time

these people know that its haram

and he is using ummah.com as some type of media to advertise his stupidity

and you guys are gullible enough to play along with it, under the guise of helping him

private message him, that would be better than exposing this forum to such filth

How do you know? Im curious akhi. As far as you know, I could be a poser or unknown, FBI agent too infiltrating Ummah.com!

[Al-Farooq]

and he is using ummah.com as some type of media to advertise his stupidity


The only person advertising their stupidity on this thread is you with your holier-than-thou attitude.

I wish I was perfect like you...although if I was, I doubt I would spend my time slagging off people crying out for help on an internet forum.

You condemn people who wear baseball caps for being unislamic, you insult scholars who don't have beards for being unislamic......yet you seem perfectly content to be unislamic yourself by ignoring the hadith which states (words to the effect of) "speak good or remain silent".

I guess it's one rule for you and another rule for the rest of us mere mortals.

[Chained_Water]

oh man its ugly in here.. :rubeyes:

[Phoenix CG]

Stay on the straight path, inshaAllah, maybe if you took part in some activities that would keep you away from any temptation it would help you.

[Ibn Khattab]

Pheonix, give the brother some advice Inshallah :outta:

[Phoenix CG]

Pheonix, give the brother some advice Inshallah :outta:

bruv stop coming onto me :torture:bet you enjoy that

nah I remember on TV sheikh sulaiman ghani said to the dude, non muslim gay dude, that he should stop wearing girly clothes like pink tops n that and to wear mens clothes and then he told him to go play cricket but the gay guy was like, theres loads of men here, n it wasnt working :p
Dunno but it must be dificult for the bro,

[AbuMubarak]

no chained, it isnt ugly

not one bit

its people being who they are

so now we should accept from scholars who shave
we should think nothing of wearing baseball caps, its normal
and its fine for me to publicize my issues on a worldwide internet forum about something so vile that no one would want to discuss it in front of our parents or siblings

but we have absolutely no problem dissin abu mubarak because?
because he wants the muslims to adhere to islam
because he wants the muslims to not be used as suckers
because he wants the muslims to look like muslims
because he wants the muslims to take their islam from people who adhere to quran and sunnah

and we can do so and speak to him in any manner we deem fit, because abu mubarak thinks he is pure, and we cant have that

[Treasured Soul]

Lets take it back to topic :)

Brother ... I think you've done the toughest part ... you've admitted you have a problem ... you have also asked for help aswell as resisted the temptation ... Masha'Allah!

I pray to Allah swt that you remain as strong as you are now ... and help you fight the shaitan in leading u astray - Insha'Allah.

I know none of us know how it feels to be in ur shoes ... but do remember ... you can do watever you set ur mind to :) and Insha'Allah, you will overcome this illness.

you have the hardest test of us all .. and remember ... Allah swt only tests us to our limits .. not an iota more than we can handle! Masha'Allah brother, you are strong!

And i also believe, those he loves more usually have the hardest tests :(

[Islamiyyah]

no chained, it isnt ugly

not one bit

its people being who they are

so now we should accept from scholars who shave
we should think nothing of wearing baseball caps, its normal
and its fine for me to publicize my issues on a worldwide internet forum about something so vile that no one would want to discuss it in front of our parents or siblings

but we have absolutely no problem dissin abu mubarak because?
because he wants the muslims to adhere to islam
because he wants the muslims to not be used as suckers
because he wants the muslims to look like muslims
because he wants the muslims to take their islam from people who adhere to quran and sunnah

and we can do so and speak to him in any manner we deem fit, because abu mubarak thinks he is pure, and we cant have that

We are not allowed to accept things from scholars who shave? I have never heard of that. There are many amazing scholars with or without beards. And also some who have beards are some of the worst :smack:

[Ibn Khattab]

bruv stop coming onto me :torture:bet you enjoy that

nah I remember on TV sheikh sulaiman ghani said to the dude, non muslim gay dude, that he should stop wearing girly clothes like pink tops n that and to wear mens clothes and then he told him to go play cricket but the gay guy was like, theres loads of men here, n it wasnt working :p
Dunno but it must be dificult for the bro,

I just thought you could give him some tips and hints from your experiences init :o

[DALEHYR]

I think everyone needs to calm down.

I can understand why AbuMubarak thinks it could be a poser because of the way the title of the topic is written, and also the fact this was not posted in the anonymous / councilling section.

I do also sympathise for the person who made this thread because if he is telling the truth then he has so far stayed away from his non fruitful desires, and that takes alot of determination.

May ALLAH Ta'ala guide us all to the correct path and make things easier for us, Ameen Sumameen! :)

[Enigma Dreamer]

We are not allowed to accept things from scholars who shave? I have never heard of that. There are many amazing scholars with or without beards. And also some who have beards are some of the worst :smack:
Well, it depends. I personally to be honest, I would never take a fatwa of a scholar who shaves his beard. You have to follow the sunnah first before you give fatwas. Although to be honest, I am yet to see on who is beardless. But that is another debate, let us not derail this thread.

[Chained_Water]

no chained, it isnt ugly

not one bit

its people being who they are

so now we should accept from scholars who shave
we should think nothing of wearing baseball caps, its normal
and its fine for me to publicize my issues on a worldwide internet forum about something so vile that no one would want to discuss it in front of our parents or siblings

but we have absolutely no problem dissin abu mubarak because?
because he wants the muslims to adhere to islam
because he wants the muslims to not be used as suckers
because he wants the muslims to look like muslims
because he wants the muslims to take their islam from people who adhere to quran and sunnah

and we can do so and speak to him in any manner we deem fit, because abu mubarak thinks he is pure, and we cant have that
Go talk to Salman about the fiqh of beards :p ..personally I like a good beard, but not everyone can grow one, and peoples ideas of what constitutes one differ and what not.. so lets leave that.

Anyhow.. we all know it's easy for someone to come on an internet forum and plea for help and advice, because it's anonymous, they will never see us out on the street so we can't judge or think bad of them.. they come here as a stranger, just one lonely soul in need of some help.. I think your posts in this thread were misplaced and that is why people have gotten annoyed at you.. because this dude clearly says he isn't acting on his impulses.. he's sincerely looking for ways to stop feeling like that and that is a struggle me and you will never understand, the least we could do is have some compassion and sympathy and pray he stops being tested with this and finds some refuge from these whisperings of shaytaan.

If a bro or sis comes looking for help and we kick them in the teeth, it won't bode well for us.

If people come looking for answers and solutions in Islam, for refuge in Islam from their personal demons.. and Muslims turn them away.. what does that say for us? :(

BTW in the past I'd come across this blog.. a bro or bunch of bros run it and it's focus is this fitnah of "homosexuality".. they actually don't like that label, because it creates an identity for people and they define themselves through it.. rather they refer to it simply as same sex attractions.. I read some stuff on it and thought it was really interesting and intelligent rebuttal of mainstream western thought on "homosexuality".. maybe threadstarter could get in touch with them and ask for help and advice they seem to know more about these things and probably have better resources and research than us average folk http://gaymuslims.wordpress.com/about/

[AbuMubarak]

i dont know why anyone keeps bringing up, people who cant grow beards, that is not the issue, anyway, i will leave this thread so you guys can talk about the struggles of sodomy

whats coming next week? nambla anonymous,

dont fear, post it at ummah.com, the muslims will take you serious

and if you dont believe that the person is true, he can post pics

i cant imagine someone coming to the prophet about his bouts with sodomy and the prophet giving advice any longer than one sentence........if that

[AbuMubarak]

chained, did you actually post a link to a gay muslim website?

this is what happens when you publicly entertain this stupidity

look at the tags on this thread

homosexual, lesbian, gay

we are going to be listed as a porn site soon

[Treasured Soul]

Exactly what the shaitaan wants :rolleyes:

[Chained_Water]

flippin 'eck ..the dude is NOT asking about sodomy, he CLEARLY said alhamdulillah he has never acted on those wrong feelings.. he just doesn't know how to get rid of them..

there is a vast difference between feeling something and doing it..

essentially he is asking something that all people ask.. and that the Prophet saw said much about.. fighting your inner desires and overcoming them to finally make your wants conform with what Allah wants from you.. that is the issue

and READ words other than your own for once :smack: ..NO it's not a gay website, to put it in terms you'll understand it's an anti-gay website run by muslims, specifically for arguing against the falsehood of "gay muslims"

[Reema]

chained, did you actually post a link to a gay muslim website?

this is what happens when you publicly entertain this stupidity

look at the tags on this thread

homosexual, lesbian, gay

we are going to be listed as a porn site soon

Is it me or do you just enjoy putting an unusual and sometimes unecessary spin on everything and anything?

[Abu Muslim]

Ya know sometimes you read things which make you think alhamdulilah. Like you would read our brothers and sisters in pallestine and how they are being under seige but the smelly yahood and you read about brothers and sisters in africa how they have no food and you read about all the brothers and sisters around the world struggling without much and you just think all praise is due to Allah for everything he gave and how merciful he has been to you....

And then you read something like this and all the other family problems in anonymous section..and it makes you just think alhamdulilah, all praise is due to Allah thats not me..

Anyways thats just me and my self contemplation. To the original poster, sorry cant help..I dont really like homos or anything related so I cant give advice, i apologise in advance. Read the Quraan, read it again and then read it somemore.

[AbuMubarak]

Is it me or do you just enjoy putting an unusual and sometimes unecessary spin on everything and anything?at first, i said reema posted, probably about her cat, or maybe her shoes

but i thought, no, let me put the best construction on it, she finally posted some ayaat or ahaadith, or something islamic




o well, maybe next time

[Reema]

at first, i said reema posted, probably about her cat, or maybe her shoes

but i thought, no, let me put the best construction on it, she finally posted some ayaat or ahaadith, or something islamic




o well, maybe next time

I'm not interested in your rambling, Answer my question.

[AbuMubarak]

flippin 'eck ..the dude is NOT asking about sodomy, he CLEARLY said alhamdulillah he has never acted on those wrong feelings.. he just doesn't know how to get rid of them..

there is a vast difference between feeling something and doing it..

essentially he is asking something that all people ask.. and that the Prophet saw said much about.. fighting your inner desires and overcoming them to finally make your wants conform with what Allah wants from you.. that is the issue

and READ words other than your own for once :smack: ..NO it's not a gay website, to put it in terms you'll understand it's an anti-gay website run by muslims, specifically for arguing against the falsehood of "gay muslims"i have feelings of going to the bathroom, do you want me to post it on ummah.com and we discuss it?

or i had a meal last night, and i feel sick, like i am going to ..............do you want me to continue? maybe you can make me feel better?

or better yet, i havent had a beer in 30 years, i am struggling with it, lets discuss it in detail my wants and desires?

these are NOT subjects for an internet forum, these are subjects that people discuss in private with those they know

or

we have an anonymous section.............specifically for this purpose

which i wouldnt advise that either

if it were holy, pious, pure me, i would join a forum, watch for a while, then find someone i feel comfortable bringing it up to

and i would NOT want to make a spectacle of such vile FEELINGS

[truemuslima]

^^ i hope u werent seriousl bout hte beer part
Wasalaam

[AbuMubarak]

sister, i wasnt always muslim, i have had my days before islam, NO, i dont struggle with drinking beer, but if i was, i guess i could post about it and we would all discuss my VERY PERSONAL PROBLEM in a public, worldwide, roundtable

aint that just fun?

[AbuMubarak]

I'm not interested in your rambling, Answer my question.

you just got married, thus i assume you dont have children, and i am sure not one of yours

but when you finally do have children, make sure you talk to them NOT like you just talked to me

though it would be much more befitting

[Chained_Water]

bro if you with your 40 thousand posts came and made this thread.. I would find it really off and ask for it to be removed..

this guy created an account to ask this question.. no doubt when he's done he will disappear..

it is basically anonymous.. and I can't believe you'd rather he told someone in real life that he's close to.. lol, you think it's better to expose yourself to those who know you?! that would be plain stupid, this guy obviously has enough shame and haya to not want people in real life to know he has this problem.. that is why he's come somewhere that he can ask anonymously and where he will probably never speak to the people again after and they won't know who he is.

and it's very different to the ridiculous examples of going to the loo and needing to vomit..

sexual urges effect people in a big way, and yeh wanting a beer is probably similar, or drug addiction or whatever.. these are things that must torture some people and be a real struggle.. if they want to come and anonymously ask for advice on the internet, so what?! if someone can help then that is fab.. if we can't we should in my humble opinion.. basically shut up and let people who have something practical and useful to say deal with it.

and I will do exactly that now because I have nothing of any further use to say. adios.

[AbuMubarak]

Hello all ...

I am a 21 year old student living in Cairo, Egypt. I have struggled all my life with homosexuality. I can't explain the pain homosexuality causes to normal people, but any homosexual would know what am talking about.
I even tried psychotherapy recently .. didn't work. I just want to clarify that I dont practice homosexuality, i mean i dont have sex with other men, elhamdulillah, but I have sexual feelings towards men and elhamdulillah Allah has helped in controlling them, and never acting upon them.
However, I feel that I can't change my sexual orientation, it is a part of me that can't just be changed.
Imagine someone asks you to change your sexual preferences, how hard do you think it would be ? This is what I go through ...
So i thought to myself, wouldnt it be easier to marry a lesbian, who knows what I am going through, and knows how i feel, and wants love, children and a happy life ?Ibn al-Qayyim - rahimahullaah- said:

'There is no doubt that the heart becomes covered with rust, just as metal dishes - silver, and their like - become rusty. So the rust of the heart is polished with dhikr, for dhikr polishes the heart until it becomes like a shiny mirror. However, when dhikr is abandoned, the rust returns; and when it commences then the heart again begins to be cleansed. Thus the heart becoming rusty is due to two matters: sins and neglecting remembrance of Allaah. Likewise, it is cleansed and polished by two things : istighfaar and dhikr.'

- Al-Waabilus-Sayyib (p.80)

[Reema]

you just got married, thus i assume you dont have children, and i am sure not one of yours

but when you finally do have children, make sure you talk to them NOT like you just talked to me

though it would be much more befitting

You know what, how I raise my children is none of your concern, what I do with my children is none of your concern, how I talk to my children is none of your concern, what I command them to do is none of your concern, in actual fact-none of this is your concern. However, what I know is that if one of my children ever came up to me and asked me for advice or guidance regarding a matter no matter how obscure it was, I would try my best and hardest to put them in the right direction. I may not have my own children yet but I know what it is like to be surrounded by masses of children on a daily basis, I alone have 49 first cousins, yes AbuM 49 and one more on the way alhamdulillah and thats just from my fathers side. In addition to that, I dont need you to teach me how to talk to children, I am a teacher by profession myself. And lastly seeing as your so brilliant at giving out advice to people, you should maybe consider acting upon your own advice once in a while.

And this concludes my stay in this thread.

[truemuslima]

sister, i wasnt always muslim, i have had my days before islam, NO, i dont struggle with drinking beer, but if i was, i guess i could post about it and we would all discuss my VERY PERSONAL PROBLEM in a public, worldwide, roundtable

aint that just fun?

OOoooooh Ok thats wut i hoped. lol


And lool @ "VERY PERSONAL PROBLEM in a public, worldwide, roundtable" !! lool



oh and evryone stop teaming up on this brother! he is wise! unlike cough cough sommmmmmecoughcough ppl coughcough

ignore my bad cough

[AbuMubarak]

why isnt it my concern, shucks, everything is everyone's concern at ummah.com

we can even discuss feelings of sodomy, gay muslims marrying lesbian muslims, there isnt such a thing as privacy, or personal business

put it all out on the open

and reema, if your child came to you, then you should deal with that as it is, a personal matter, NOT publicize it at ummah.com, which is my point

[AbuMubarak]

OOoooooh Ok thats wut i hoped. lol


And lool @ "VERY PERSONAL PROBLEM in a public, worldwide, roundtable" !! lool



oh and evryone stop teaming up on this brother! he is wise! unlike cough cough sommmmmmecoughcough ppl coughcough

ignore my bad coughbecareful

or you will be considered part of my gang who likes to agree with everything i say and do

thats the kiss of death around here

[Salman Al-Farsi]

Dear brothers and sisters

Firstly, we should not assume until we have proof.

Secondly, why do we always have to brush things under the carpet? Homosexuality is not an unknown phenomenon in the Muslim world, we don't have stats becasue things happen behind closed doors, there are gay men and lesbianism is on the rise. WE have to deal with these problems like we have to deal with all other problems harming the fabric of muslim socieites due to influx of foreign ideas.

Thirdly, we have to get out of the frame of mind which dictates that the only solution to any problem of sexual nature is marriage! Marriage is not the solution, but perhaps one of the solution. You don't tell a 15 year old who is beginning to have crushes and sexual inclinations to get married, he can't even look after himself how is he going to managed another person??

Human mind is very complex, but Islam addressed the human mind and the inclination by creating hamony between the two. So every human being has sexual inclinations which are natural and part of the procreational instinct, however how these inclinations are satisfied are dictated by the mind.

To make our actions and inclincations conform with the shariah of Allah Ta'ala is not only struggle for person with homosexual thoughts, but for that man who has thougths for another women, or women for a man, or the person who thinks about playing the lottery to become rich, or the one who thinks about having a big car so they can show off or the person who thinks about Riba so they can have a nice house. These are all thoughts which come to our mind and we have to deal with them and purify our mind from it.

So how can we rebuke a person for asking advise on how to purify themselves from these thoughts??

[truemuslima]

becareful

or you will be considered part of my gang who likes to agree with everything i say and do

thats the kiss of death around here

everybody i change my mind


EVERYBODY TEAM UP ON THIS BROTHER!!!

....now?

if not i do it alone!

funny everyone looks the same here all colorful u cant tell whos a mod..lol

[Chained_Water]

Dear brothers and sisters

Firstly, we should not assume until we have proof.

Secondly, why do we always have to brush things under the carpet? Homosexuality is not an unknown phenomenon in the Muslim world, we don't have stats becasue things happen behind closed doors, there are gay men and lesbianism is on the rise. WE have to deal with these problems like we have to deal with all other problems harming the fabric of muslim socieites due to influx of foreign ideas.

Thirdly, we have to get out of the frame of mind which dictates that the only solution to any problem of sexual nature is marriage! Marriage is not the solution, but perhaps one of the solution. You don't tell a 15 year old who is beginning to have crushes and sexual inclinations to get married, he can't even look after himself how is he going to managed another person??

Human mind is very complex, but Islam addressed the human mind and the inclination by creating hamony between the two. So every human being has sexual inclinations which are natural and part of the procreational instinct, however how these inclinations are satisfied are dictated by the mind.

To make our actions and inclincations conform with the shariah of Allah Ta'ala is not only struggle for person with homosexual thoughts, but for that man who has thougths for another women, or women for a man, or the person who thinks about playing the lottery to become rich, or the one who thinks about having a big car so they can show off or the person who thinks about Riba so they can have a nice house. These are all thoughts which come to our mind and we have to deal with them and purify our mind from it.

So how can we rebuke a person for asking advise on how to purify themselves from these thoughts??
mashaAllah.. very well put.. much better than any of us said it :up:

[AbuMubarak]

salman, i am not rebuking anyone for having thoughts

i have thoughts

but its common sense and basic decency to discuss things in an appropriate manner

this aint it, but as you are a mod, i will defer to your decision on this thread and leave this as my last post

[Yokel]

........................................

[Pippin1376]

Let's be civil brothers and sisters. Remember that you believe the same thing and you all love Allah, so for the sake of Allah love each other and try not to grow resentment towards each other.

Brother Salman, that was a very nice post :up:

[Halim1814]

assalam alaikum

mashaALLAH brother...

i really became so surprised and happy that you are striving against it..

i am unable to say anything but to say mashaALLAH and pray for you..

:)

may ALLAH help you and gmay you enter jannah with sahabah and may ALLAH give you pious and beautiful wife who would give you as many children as you wish... and may ALLAH be happy with you of youy struggle through this fitnah and may ALLAH make your standard like mujahideen who fight in the battle field for ALLAH
amin


wassalam

take care and do not let your self a campanion of shaitan

fe hifz ar rahman


Abood,
Thanks alot for your kind words ... They mean alot to me, and to others who are going through the same thing.

Thank you :)

[Halim1814]

i dont believe the poster, i think its a hoax
LOL, why would you say that ?
I know it sounds very lame, but alot of people in my situation actually do that ... its good to know your options I guess ....

[Saudi Prince]

sorry, i dont see explaining right and wrong to a sodomite as being a good deed

its a waste of time

these people know that its haram

and he is using ummah.com as some type of media to advertise his stupidity

and you guys are gullible enough to play along with it, under the guise of helping him

private message him, that would be better than exposing this forum to such filth


You never ceased to amaze me! Do you read Quran? Is there a surah called Lott or am I mistaken? What Lott A.S warn his people about?

[Halim1814]

sorry, i dont see explaining right and wrong to a sodomite as being a good deed

its a waste of time

these people know that its haram

and he is using ummah.com as some type of media to advertise his stupidity

and you guys are gullible enough to play along with it, under the guise of helping him

private message him, that would be better than exposing this forum to such filth

AbuMubarak,
Am ready to bet on good money that if you were in my place, you would have either committed suicide, or given up to your filthy lusts. Who are you to call me a sodomite ?
I never practiced homosexuality, and never will inshalla. I am not looking for attention or "some type of media to advertise his stupidity". I know its haram.
But I don't blame you, youll never know how it feels like.

[Halim1814]

Sometimes I admire your posts....other times I'm suprised and disgusted at some of the comments you come up with. Put yourself in his position and try to think from his perspective....you can't can you..because AbuMubarak has no faults....subhanallah...rather than consoling and helping your own Muslim brother you choose to make a mockery of what he says.

Yes he does know it's haraam and Alhamdulillah he's not acting upon it....what's important is to help him and give him advice. No one is perfect.

And last but not least...yes you are a moderator....but you have your limits. Behave like a moderator. Behave like a Muslim and if you have nothing good to say..then don't say anything at all.

: )

[Umm_Hanzalah]

I think this thread should be closed now, as the brother has the advice he needs......it's just causing a lot of fitnah now.

[Halim1814]

bruv stop coming onto me :torture:bet you enjoy that

nah I remember on TV sheikh sulaiman ghani said to the dude, non muslim gay dude, that he should stop wearing girly clothes like pink tops n that and to wear mens clothes and then he told him to go play cricket but the gay guy was like, theres loads of men here, n it wasnt working :p
Dunno but it must be dificult for the bro,

LOL ... I wouldnt call myself a GAY though !
I never wear pink, its too feminine. I play squash, football ...

[LastFriday]

salman, i am not rebuking anyone for having thoughts

i have thoughts

but its common sense and basic decency to discuss things in an appropriate manner

this aint it, but as you are a mod, i will defer to your decision on this thread and leave this as my last post

So you'll only agree with Mods? Hrmm, interesting.

Homosexuality, we have to deal with it. There is no ONE solution in Islam about it is there? so how can speaking to ONE sheikh on a personal level going to help? This brother asked around and has tried to get help from many venues, is his issue not PUBLIC already? I mean, this whole forum is Anonymous as it is, you don't know anyones names. Were living in the 21st century buddy, you can't brush off Homosexuality like this.

[Halim1814]

no chained, it isnt ugly

not one bit

its people being who they are

so now we should accept from scholars who shave
we should think nothing of wearing baseball caps, its normal
and its fine for me to publicize my issues on a worldwide internet forum about something so vile that no one would want to discuss it in front of our parents or siblings

but we have absolutely no problem dissin abu mubarak because?
because he wants the muslims to adhere to islam
because he wants the muslims to not be used as suckers
because he wants the muslims to look like muslims
because he wants the muslims to take their islam from people who adhere to quran and sunnah

and we can do so and speak to him in any manner we deem fit, because abu mubarak thinks he is pure, and we cant have that

AbuMubarak,
Homosexuality, im my opinion, is somthing that must be discussed with every teenager. If I would have gotten the right advice at the age of 15 or 16, I WOULDNT HAVE BEEN HERE ... Our Prophet (PBUH) spoke about homosexuality openly, and so does the Quran. Are you saying that parts of the Quran should not be read by children ????
I hope Allah forgives you for what you've said, coz i wount. I have been looking through the internet since I was 15 for answers, you have no idea how confusing it can get. One site sez that you should accept yourself for who you are, that Allah swt will accept you for who you are,GAY AND MUSLIM blablabla, when it is VERY CLEAR to anyone that homosexuality is haraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaam. Another site would tell me to convert to christianity, where I can be accepted and loved for who I am. Another would say that I have to live like this for the rest of my life, and that is just the way it is. But "laa yohammelo Allah nafsann ella wesaahaa", and I wanna get married, fall in love, have kids ... so I have always known there is a way out, and inshalla it will happen for me someday.
I have placed those tags because they are the ones i've used for years, and I hope someone in need of advice would find them using the same tags ...
Salam Alaikom

[Halim1814]

Thank You All For Being Supportive, And For Having Deep Understanding Of What Islam Is Really About ...
Salam

[Saudi Prince]

no chained, it isnt ugly

not one bit

its people being who they are

so now we should accept from scholars who shave
we should think nothing of wearing baseball caps, its normal
and its fine for me to publicize my issues on a worldwide internet forum about something so vile that no one would want to discuss it in front of our parents or siblings

but we have absolutely no problem dissin abu mubarak because?
because he wants the muslims to adhere to islam
because he wants the muslims to not be used as suckers
because he wants the muslims to look like muslims
because he wants the muslims to take their islam from people who adhere to quran and sunnah

and we can do so and speak to him in any manner we deem fit, because abu mubarak thinks he is pure, and we cant have that


Was what you said Islamic? Let's see!

The guy did not say can I practice homosexuality however your respnse to him was this:

sorry, i dont see explaining right and wrong to a sodomite as being a good deed

its a waste of time

these people know that its haram

But when a man came to the prophet SAAW and asked him permisson to commit adultrey, this is what the prophet SAAW said to the man:

A young man once came to our Prophet (peace be upon him) and said: “O, Messenger of God give me a permission to commit fornication.”
The Companions were angry with the way that young man who dared to ask such a thing from the Prophet (peace be upon him), but the Prophet (peace be upon him) did not grow angry and immediately asked him: “Would you like a man to fornicate with your mother?”
The young man replied: “No.”
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “Hence other people do not like it for their mothers. Would you like it for your daughter?”
The man said: “No.”
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “Hence people do not like it for their daughters. ”


Now, is what you said Islamic? You don't have to answer this for me but for yourself.

[Al-Farooq]

no chained, it isnt ugly

not one bit

its people being who they are

so now we should accept from scholars who shave
we should think nothing of wearing baseball caps, its normal
and its fine for me to publicize my issues on a worldwide internet forum about something so vile that no one would want to discuss it in front of our parents or siblings

but we have absolutely no problem dissin abu mubarak because?
because he wants the muslims to adhere to islam
because he wants the muslims to not be used as suckers
because he wants the muslims to look like muslims
because he wants the muslims to take their islam from people who adhere to quran and sunnah

and we can do so and speak to him in any manner we deem fit, because abu mubarak thinks he is pure, and we cant have that

You've got that "victim mentality" down to a fine art.

Maybe you should examine how you address others and how you assume things about the behaviour, beliefs and intentions of others, without any proof whatsoever......rather than playing the victim card each and every time someone pulls you up about your attitude.

[Hekmaa]

sorry, i dont see explaining right and wrong to a sodomite as being a good deed

its a waste of time

these people know that its haram

and he is using ummah.com as some type of media to advertise his stupidity

and you guys are gullible enough to play along with it, under the guise of helping him

private message him, that would be better than exposing this forum to such filth

This was already reported in Help Desk, why didnt you just do what you preached? and address this privately and possibly delete or close the thread. You could have even got a physcologist and i think there are some on this forum, to talk to this person via the help desk so they are both protected.

why didnt you address the issue then, rather than have a ego outburst where you are on some high stool and the rest are miles below you.

Like you say to others on this forum, once you see the title, if you dont like it, dont open it.

Then you give yourself the right to make personal attacks on sisters, and you call yourself a man? Shame on you, how dare you comment about how a sister should run her private life on here.

I believe the moderators should slap you with a 6 months ban, this is a test to all you moderators.

You just disgust me.

[Summayah]

Thread Closed.

Brother Halim1814 my sincere apologies about the way in which this thread took an undesired tanget but it contains some excellent advise to reflect upon.

:)

[AbuMubarak]

This was already reported in Help Desk, why didnt you just do what you preached? and address this privately and possibly delete or close the thread. You could have even got a physcologist and i think there are some on this forum, to talk to this person via the help desk so they are both protected.

why didnt you address the issue then, rather than have a ego outburst where you are on some high stool and the rest are miles below you.

Like you say to others on this forum, once you see the title, if you dont like it, dont open it.

Then you give yourself the right to make personal attacks on sisters, and you call yourself a man? Shame on you, how dare you comment about how a sister should run her private life on here.

I believe the moderators should slap you with a 6 months ban, this is a test to all you moderators.

You just disgust me.
i disgust you?

i did close the thread, someone reopened it
i would love to totally ignore threads, but as a mod, that would be abdicating my responsibility
if you believe i am on a high stool, then you get a taller one
personal attacks on sisters? dare i ask where?

you want me removed as a mod, then petition sajid, and if he asks me, or even tells me, i will step down, without regret

i disgust you? you have the thinnest of skins if this disgusts you

the subject of sodomy doesnt disgust you

you didnt tell HIM to be a man

but AbuMubarak disgusts you and you tell ME to be a man.............

[AbuMubarak]

You've got that "victim mentality" down to a fine art.

Maybe you should examine how you address others and how you assume things about the behaviour, beliefs and intentions of others, without any proof whatsoever......rather than playing the victim card each and every time someone pulls you up about your attitude.

interesting the things that come out when you try to voice how a thread titled as this is not something that should be discussed in an open forum, with every tom joe and harry giving their input

its interesting to see brothers, who you regard as brothers, say some of the most vile things, and then when you speak on it, I am playing the victim???

like i said, if you and all of you or any of you or some of you want me removed as a mod, then by all means petition the mods here and if they want me to leave, i am outtie

so stop your belly aching and put actions behind your words

[Al-Nasser]

Abu Mubarak capabilities as a mod is out of question.....he is a star

its his posts as a regular user which is a matter of disagreement

for me personally it's the first time in four years i read something by Abu Mubarak and disagree with it passionately