finding it difficult to become more confident

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Salam my brothers and sisters, hope you are all in the best of health and Imaan :)

I have always been a very confident person, I wouldnt say I was a chatterbox, but I'm not the silent type...but basically since a few years back, I haven't been the same, I found out that a few of my closest friends were speaking about me (constantly) behind my back, I am the type of person that has never been enemies with anyone, always the first to apologize and make the peace, so I honestly couldnt understand why they would say such things about me...since then I have been really wary of what people think of me, even though I know I shouldn't its always something thats at the back of my mind, I'm constantly overthinking everything I say just in case someone doesn't like me, or something like that...because of this I have been finding it extremely difficult to make new friends, Alhamdulillah I made some amazing friends at college, but once I entered uni I found it so hard to speak to new people...although I have met sisters at uni that are such amazing people, but I still feel awkward around them as well, careful of things I say just in case what happened before will happen again, even though I know it won't because these sisters are not like this..but I don't know how to regain my confidence again, I'm very comfortable around my old friends and my family, I just don't understand why I can't be more social or more comfortable around new people..its getting to a point where I am picking out problems within my own personality, even though I am certain its not an issue :(

any advice or views would be greatly appreciated :)

wasalam

[THE PATH 2.]

words of a saint..waliullah

DONT EXPECT ANYTHING FROM ANYONE AND YOU WILL NEVER BE DISAPOINTED


a great TONIC

really makes sense...

ALLAH ALONE WILL GIVE US THE RESPECT AND LOVE AND MERCY WE DESERVE ON THE DAY OF JUDGEMENT IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE OF MANKIND FROM ADAM A.S. TILL THE LAST MAN..

everyone else can be like feathers in the wind
like leaves in the storm that we call life

WHAT ALLAH KNOWS IS WHAT MATTERS..ONLY

[RK9CFd]

You can choose your friends, but you can't choose your family.

Personally, I find the only way I can deal with family is by not taking them too seriously.

Ma'aSalaama

[yourusername<3]

I have experienced something similar. after telling that person i dont like being discussed when i am not present (in a non obvious way) i was called mean (lol) and now they lie blatantly to my face!once this person gave me dirty looks n then tiptoed behind me thinking i couldnt see.the person dresses islamically and is what u wld call practising (i guess) but ithink fails to understand what backbiting is.
keep what you say to your m8s in university to the point and if you dont feel comfortable in saying something that they might pick up on or mock then u dont hav to.maybe its the words you use when saying things that may have caused them 2 talk abt you bcoz they may have misunderstood a point u was trying to make perhaps?i agree with not expecting anything from anyone nd u wont be disappointed.

[ununun]

all this implies is that your life and confidence is for others and not yourself.

self confidence purely means being confident in yourself.

it should never buckle when ever you hear something bad about yourself. i can understand it would be a bit painful hearing such things, but with pain comes change.

either they are wrong or misunderstood, or you are wrong and misunderstood about yourself.