New Mothers' physical and mental health - what you can do

[dhakiyya]

Moderators note: this sticky thread is for information. Please do post extra information on the same subject, or your own experiences and questions relating to the topic. However, conversation and/or arguing will be deleted inshaAllah.

Why do women get PND, can it be stopped, or lessened???

Post natal depression is a chemical imbalance - all of the suggestions below can help prevent it (and help stave it off in the early stages) but if someone does get it it doesn't mean they were not well supported or that their family could have done more. And if someone is well supported and has lots of help it doesn't mean you should not be concerned if they have symptoms of depression.

what a husband can do inshaAllah:

be as supportive as you can to your wife after she has babies. Help her with the housework or even better try to get someone else that can keep the house in order whilst the baby is very small

If she had a difficult birth or a c-section, make sure she gets proper rest and time to recover.

Make sure she gets plenty of sunlight, take her for walks in the park for example, if she had a c-section, you push the pram and take it slowly. When at home, make her keep the curtains open when its daylight outside. If its winter, be strict about having her get out every day whilst its light. The rest of the time she should rest and concentrate on breastfeeding.

make sure she eats good healthy meals regularly, and plenty of healthy snacks and plenty of water so she can make lots of milk and also get enough nutrition herself. If that means you cooking or getting someone in to cook, or to prepare meals for you both and bring them round inshaAllah you should.

Make sure she gets some exercise which is appropriate to her condition. Start with just walking, then pushing the pram and as she recovers from the birth inshaAllah she can get back into her previous exercise routine (or a better one!)

Make sure she gets time to socialise with other women, especially other mothers - preferably Muslims! Be careful about inviting everyone round or having too many visits because she'll get tired, but try to ensure that she's socialising.

Let her spend time with her mum, especially if mum is helping round the house and with the baby too. Mums are an invaluable source of advice and support when you have a baby cause they've been there and done that and can tell you you did the same when you were a baby lol.

Spend lots of time just the two of you and the baby, just being parents. Its very hard work, but its also enjoyable and you should enjoy it together inshaAllah, like cooing at the baby together.

Try to do some of the night time things for her, e.g. changing nappies. If she's breastfeeding you can't really help her with this but you can give her a hug so she knows your're there and you appreciate her, you can give her cushions to make sure she's comfortable and maybe put a blanket round her shoulders to make sure she's not cold. And very importantly make sure she has enough water as breastfeeding makes you very thirsty. If she wants to express some milk into a bottle, you could do one of the night feeds whilst she catches up on sleep inshaAllah.

If you are worried that she is always down, crying a lot, doesn't seem to be enjoying being a mum, is always scared for the baby (all new mums are anxious about the baby, but if it seems like much more fear and anxiety than normal) contact your GP or health visitor to have a chat with your wife, they can see if she's actualy depressed or not, or just tired and hormonal. InshaAllah if she does get depression its best to nip it in the bud. If you suspect your wife is becoming depressed, don't just wait and see, chat with the health visitor. They're trained to help inshaAllah.

[ummbilal]

Post natal depression is something we cannot prevent except with duas inshaallah and general good health, its more commen in mothers of twins probably because of the shear volume of work involved, its heart breaking that this mother has left her babies without a mum.

Inshaallah we will be protected from post natal depression.

It can feel utterly helpless, even though u have this beautiful little baby, subhannallah it must be hard for the fathers to understand, the best thing a father can do other than all the things Dhkayya suggests, is to watch for the signs of depression, and tell a midwife etc.. that u r deeply concerned about your wife, postnatal depression can very often go undiagnosed and women put it down to tiredness or simply dont want to make a fuss, personally i just thought there was something wrong with me as a person to feel so down for no reason.

Treatment is very effective and helpful.

also to get my own therioes in, a mother who has a natural birth with low use of pain relief..ie no epidural tend to feel better about herself after the birth than a mum who has servious intervention like a c section which can prevent the natural hormones of birth being released.

Allahualam

[Ebony]

Its very important to ensure she has help available to her when she needs it.

In certain communities the new mother has older women around her to help her recover (be it physically or emotionally/mentally) not like how it is here whereby you have your kid and then are plonked with him/her and left at home for hours on end alone! (yeah so the health worker pops in every now and again its not quite the same thing)

Sometimes PND can be hormonal, sometimes its due to being overwhelmed with everything and not having enough support or perhaps it is even because the mother hasnt bonded with the baby/doesn't know how to.

Pills aren't the answer to everything.

[dhakiyya]

You're a student of a health profession, but are you a mother? Have you ever been through child birth? You have no idea of it till you have been there. Many women are physically and/or mentally unable to seek help.

Shame on who? Her? What about the people around her who knew something was wrong, but didn't act on it? Obviously her mentality was not right, she was not in her right mind. She was unable to think logically about her actions. Is this her fault?

I don't think you should judge this woman, esp if you've never had postpartum depression, or even worse, postpartum psychosis (http://www.pregnancy-info.net/postpartum_psychosis.html).

Good post :up:

The trouble with mental illness is it affects your ability to think rationally. So you can't blame a mentally ill person for not thinking or behaving rationally.

This is why it is very important for everyone, mothers, fathers, grandparents, health professionals, the community, to know what post natal depression is and when to seek help advice inshaAllah.

its not been mentioned yet on this thread, but needs to be, occasionally men can get post natal depression. In his case its not hormonal, but brought on by the stress and pressure of being a new father - fathers have many of the same pressures as mothers, and they also have to look after the new mother as well as the new baby. If his wife had a difficult and/or long labour, emergency c-section, other complications, he can be left feeling traumatised seeing the woman he loves go through all this, and all the stress and worry of waiting, not knowing what will happen. He may have been afraid for the life of his wife and his child. This of course can contribute to depression!

So whilst it usually happens to mothers, please be aware that it can happen to fathers too. At the moment its underdiagnosed due to lack of knowledge about it.

[ummbilal]

from a chinese medicine site, lots of good advice esspecially the warming foods like ginger, these tips are useful for new mothers and those recovering after a miscarriage, the soups aid with the body's repair.


Diet and Postnatal Recovery

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There is a long documented history in traditional Chinese medicine of women taking dietary remedies to encourage lactation and to promote their recovery from childbirth or a miscarriage. Specific foods are seen to be especially valuable, for example:
Foods that tonify Qi (energy) include;

Oats, rice, potato, sweet potato, pumpkin, mushroom (button and ****ake), yam, date, grape, Kidney beans, tofu, beef, chicken, tuna, egg, jasmine tea and spices such as; basil, cinnamon, clove, dill, fennel, fenugreek, ginger, nutmeg, rosemary, thyme.
Examples of every day western foods that can be used to build Qi

• Oat porridge with dates
• Roast sweet potatoes, pumpkin and yams with rosemary
• Chicken stir fry with shiitake mushrooms and rice
• Shepherds pie with beef mince, mushrooms, carrots and mashed potato as a topping
• Peanut Satay sauce with chicken or meat on rice
• Potato and egg salad
• Tuna fish pie made with hard boiled eggs and served with mashed potatoes and peas
• Stir fired Tofu, eggplant and mushrooms with sesame seeds on rice
• Home made muesli slice with honey and dates
Foods to build blood include;

Corn, sweet rice, beetroot, all dark leafy greens, mushroom, apricot, avocado, date, kidney bean, sesame seeds, chicken, mussels, egg and soya milk as well as the obvious iron rich foods such as red meat and spinach.
Examples of every day western foods that can be used to build Blood

• Rice porridges with Soya milk, apricots and almonds
• Dark leafy green salads with avocado and grated beetroot
• Warm chicken salad with artichoke and grapes
• Chicken mushroom casserole served with rice
• Scrambled Eggs with parsley
• Chicken, avocado and watercress sandwiches
• Mussel Chowder with calamari
• Kidney bean and mushroom lasagne with a spinach salad
• Any red meat dish.

(Note the maximum recommended intake of meat in traditional Chinese medicine is 2 –4 oz per serving, 3 –7 times a week).

Cooking methods are also an important consideration, as slowly or lightly cooked foods are seen as more nourishing and kinder to the digestive system. The vital difference between using raw oats in muesli and consuming oats cooked in porridge, or having a lettuce salad instead of stir cooked vegetables. This is the reason why soups (especially chicken), are considered so nourishing in those initial postnatal weeks. While the ingredients from some of the traditional recipes are not automatically transferable to a western diet (soups consisting of black- bone chicken, pig trotters or Astragalus Root and pork liver are usually off-putting through description alone), others are a pleasant way to nourish yourself post birth.
Congees

A congee is traditional Chinese medicinal porridge made from rice or barley. It is seen as a powerful therapeutic food for strengthening digestion, boasting energy and aiding in the recovery from illness.

A basic congee can be made from using one cup of grain to 6- 9 cups of water or chicken stock.

• The amount of liquid you use will determine the thickness of the porridge, which can be thick like an oat porridge or watery like a soup, depending on your preference.

• Polished rice is usually used, however sweet (glutinous rice) can be used to give a sweeter tasting congee

To prepare, simply rinse the rice thoroughly and place with the liquid in a crockpot overnight (on low heat). Or simmer in a heavy pot on a low heat for 4-6 hrs, stirring frequently.

To this basic recipe any combination of Chinese red dates, black dates, cinnamon, cardamonn, fresh ginger, chicken, pork or mushrooms can be added for flavour and medicinal properties. Suggestions include

• Use sweet glutinous rice cooked with apricots or black dates and a little cinnamon for a sweet warming Qi and Blood tonifing congee

• Add fresh Shiitake mushrooms cooked with a little garlic to a plain cooked rice congee, topping with freshly chopped spring onion for a warming savoury Qi and Blood building congee

• Grind 25 grams of black sesame seeds, add to the uncooked rice and cook as a normal congee for a blood building congee

• Cook slices of chicken and ginger in a rice congee replacing the water with chicken stock and topping with spring onion for a variation on chicken soup
Chicken Qi and Blood building recipes

Traditional receipies from Lee Yueh-O
Chicken Casserole

600 ml bottle rice wine
5 medium slices fresh ginger
8 fresh chicken pieces
2 tablespoons black sesame oil
Heat pan and add sesame oil. Add ginger and briefly stir-fry. Add chicken and cook until golden brown before adding rice wine. Bring to the boil, reduce heat and simmer for 20 –40 minutes.
Chicken Soup

One medium chicken
5 – 6 mussels
3 litres water
Bring water to the boil, add the chicken and mussels and simmer for 3 hrs. Cool strain any impurities that are on the surface, reheat and eat as a soup.
Recipes for recovery post birth
From “Chinese Foods for Longevity” by Henry C Lu

Bring to the boil 10 red dates with 3 grams of Dongui in 1 cup of water. Simmer until the water is reduced to ½ a cup. Drink daily as an energy tonic after childbirth.

Boil until very soft 1 to 3 fresh figs (or 30 grams dry figs) with 2 red dates and 60 grams lean pork. Eat once a day to increase milk secretion following childbirth

Boil 30 g red dates with 1 whole chicken, 4 fresh ginger slices and 30 grams brown sugar in water until chicken is cooked. Eat at meals to relieve weakness after childbirth.
Rest and Recovery time

The concept of adequate rest to ensure women completely recovered from childbirth is an important part of traditional Chinese medicine. It involves the idea that it will take women at least a month to fully recover from childbirth, an idea not necessarily widespread in Western society. Usually partners or relatives will endeavour to be around to help out after the birth for a week (two weeks if the women are really luckily), then, for most women its back to “normal”.

It may be an appealing idea that “super mums” will be fit and ready for action within a week or two following birth, but this is not the reality for most women. While most will certainly cope (and be rewarded by plenty of verbal feedback on how well they are doing), several months later it is often hard to shake off the tiredness and exhaustion.

While 30 days (or even 100 days in some of the Chinese texts) of recovery time may initially sound a little excessive, it is in reality a reasonable time period if it is considered that this is needed to compensate for not only the birth but also the total experience of being pregnant for nine months. This is not a time for absolute bed rest but rather a time where physical rest is taken at every opportunity, exercise is appropriate (not an exhausting attempt to get back into shape), and attention is placed on a diet, as outlined above so that there is an emphasis on building blood and energy.

Ideally acupuncture treatment is also given once a week commencing from 2 weeks postpartum for a total of 3 weeks to promote stamina and an efficient recovery. Acupuncture can also be useful at this time to balance emotions, aid perineal healing and help with any breastfeeding problems.

[naila-k]

I'm a bit cinfused about the going for walks bit, arent i meant to stay inside for 40 days?

[.: Anna :.]

I'm a bit cinfused about the going for walks bit, arent i meant to stay inside for 40 days?

no you dont hav to. i dont think there is ne evidence to say that, its just culture? and if u do it wil probly contribute to likliness of pnd as that is nearly 6 weeks without going out.

[dhakiyya]

no you don't have to stay inside for 40 days. but you should rest though... it is very important to go out in the sunlight for a short time each day and also to keep the curtains open, because you need sunlight for your mental health, and this helps to prevent post natal depression (lack of sunlight is a contributing factor in many forms of depression) btw doesn't have to be much sunlight, even on a cloudy day in England there is enough sunlight to keep you healthy inshaAllah