View Full Version : Marriage again - This is good!
Salaam,
I have been on a few threads and have seen people talking about love marriages, arranged marriages, love itself etc etc What I want to know is what if a guy (muslim) before getting into islam 100%, before knowing of the consequences, is in a relationship with a muslim girl, after a few years have passed they decide to get married (love marriage) but for some reason they hit a hurdle and can not get married....a few months have passed and the guy decides he wants to get married elsewhere, someone practicing etc (knowing he still has feelings for that girl, but nothing can be done) in a situation like that what would you do? You want to get married, but you dont know who to, what would you do if you were that guy? Ladies feel free to answer aswell.
Jazakallah
carol_au
05-02-08, 05:22 AM
Salaam,
I have been on a few threads and have seen people talking about love marriages, arranged marriages, love itself etc etc What I want to know is what if a guy (muslim) before getting into islam 100%, before knowing of the consequences, is in a relationship with a muslim girl, after a few years have passed they decide to get married (love marriage) but for some reason they hit a hurdle and can not get married....a few months have passed and the guy decides he wants to get married elsewhere, someone practicing etc (knowing he still has feelings for that girl, but nothing can be done) in a situation like that what would you do? You want to get married, but you dont know who to, what would you do if you were that guy? Ladies feel free to answer aswell.
Jazakallah
wa alaikum assalaam
I think it is very important he try to leave the first girl behind in his thoughts and move to a sister who he knows he can marry. If the interest in the first sister is still strong, and there is no hope for marriage ever in the future with her , then he needs to trust Allah will put love in his heart for a sister he thinks he can live with as his wife insha'Allah.
By the Mercy of Allah.. the first sister will start to move from his mind as he begins life with a sister who will work with him, and he with her to build their faith, their knowledge and their love of Allah together insha'Allah
LastFriday
05-02-08, 05:37 AM
Walaikum Assalam,
Ok, first and foremost I think that person, whoever it may be :rolleyes:, needs to stop and self reflect. I can already see a lot of problems with this. You said, "before getting into Islam 100%" That seems to me as if he knew what he was doing was wrong and but still continued in the hopes that one day he will change. Which is a very wrong attitude because death can come any minute! He should fear Allah (swt) and really, repent first!
Second of all, having a relationship with a woman is not allowed in Islam! Other than that she is your sister in Islam. So in my opinion, if he is going into Islam 100% then he needs to well just marry her and try to get her to get into Islam 100% too or if this hurdle is so big, as in family disapprovals or something else than he should cut all the ties with this woman he in "love" with.
Thirdly, he has been in this relationship with this woman for a few YEARS! So I'm guessing its a gf/bf relationship and I don't want to assume the worst, but my mind can't get off it. Also if you in only two months this guy has decided to marry elsewhere, how strong is their "love" to begin with?? I mean from a few years to a few month? So I really don't think he should try to marry a more religious person and end up destroying her life too. You said "Who would you get married to", so I assume he already found that "practicing" Muslim.
In conclusion, I think that person should stop all this nonsense business. Stop running around woman. And get himself straighten out. Turn to Allah (swt) and ask for repentance! Turn to Allah (swt) and if he is sincere and wants to "turn to Islam 100%" then give 100% first to ISLAM then think about getting married. I means up to him really, but if he REALLY wants to get married now, he should try to marry the person he was in "love" with and then improve together. If not, end the relationship, period with all Women and just focus on his deen. <-- Thats what I would do "IF" I was in that position. Just my 2 Cents.
PiElle2
05-02-08, 06:58 AM
they want to get married but hit a hurdle...? how tough can this hurdle be...? can't they work it out...? no wonder they can't get married...
Raashid
05-02-08, 07:02 AM
They're both now unchaste, so don't deserve anyone but each other (or similar). He says he wants a practicing sister, why should he get a chaste sister since he isn't? And that first girl is now damaged goods, so she shouldn't be put back into circulation.
They made their bed, now they should lie in it (intentional pun:D).
carol_au
05-02-08, 07:10 AM
Tjhe brother in his post said this
1. What I want to know is what if a guy (muslim) before getting into islam 100%, before knowing of the consequences, is in a relationship with a muslim girl,
The key word here is "before" ..
There are countless brothers and sisters in this situation.. This brother and sister for what ever reason (and that really is no business of ours) did not marry. and now they have parted.
it sounds like the brother is now practicing and wants to marry again. I am assuming he has repented his past and is now looking to his future.. so do we hold his past against him and say he has no right to find a sister who is practicing.. if he himself is practicing?
and no one says they are unchaste anyway.. this is pure speculation. We can only discuss based on what we have been told.
The brother wants to remarry .. he has admitted the sister is not yet out of his mind. but from my point of view, the fact he is willing to move on is a sign that he is trying to put the past behind and move to his future and with a sister who this time he can join with in a halal way ..
May Allah help him
And that first girl is now damaged goods, so she shouldn't be put back into circulation.
I see, so not only do you think men are a lost cause, but so are women?
Is this what Islam teaches you? That women become used? Or damaged? Even after they've repented? :vomit:
Raashid
05-02-08, 07:22 AM
I see, so not only do you think men are a lost cause, but so are women?
Is this what Islam teaches you? That women become used? Or damaged? Even after they've repented? :vomit:
They both are, I said the man doesn't deserve a chaste woman himself for being in a haram relationship. So I'm not just picking on women.
Salaam,
I have been on a few threads and have seen people talking about love marriages, arranged marriages, love itself etc etc What I want to know is what if a guy (muslim) before getting into islam 100%, before knowing of the consequences, is in a relationship with a muslim girl, after a few years have passed they decide to get married (love marriage) but for some reason they hit a hurdle and can not get married....a few months have passed and the guy decides he wants to get married elsewhere, someone practicing etc (knowing he still has feelings for that girl, but nothing can be done) in a situation like that what would you do? You want to get married, but you dont know who to, what would you do if you were that guy? Ladies feel free to answer aswell.
Jazakallah
:wswrwb: firstly he has to repent sincerely and never return to the sin before he can marry anyone, as said in Quran fornicators are for the fornicators and having an illicit relationship with a woman is haram, wether they are having intimate relations or not. So he wont be eligable as a muslim to marry anyone untill he repents sincerely,may Allah accept it amin, in regards to the first woman if she is a muslim, and she does not repent for what she has done and return to islam, then he cannot marry her anyway.
In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful
And come not near to the unlawful sexual Intercourse.
Verily, it is a Faahishah [(i.e. anything that transgresses its limits
(a great sin)], and an evil way (that leads one to Hell unless Allah forgives him).
[Quran, Al-Israa' (17):32]
Is zinaa intercourse only?
Question:
I need further information about the verse interpreted here about adultery. Adultery, according to the Hudood I read, require penetration. Is that true of Islamic law?
Are married persons, or single for that case, indulging in immoral acts that do not include penetration (but maybe oral sex), exempted from this punishment?
Secondly, is there a forgiveness for adultery? Or for what I inquired in my previous question.
I'd be greatly obliged to recieve an answer, because this issue has confused me for a long time.
Answer:
Praise be to Allaah.
Zinaa, in Arabic, means immorality, and is used with two meanings in shar’: a general meaning and a specific meaning.
The general meaning includes that which carries the punishment (hadd) and that which does not carry it. Islam does not give the name of zinaa only to that which carries the punishment, which is just one of many types of zinaa. Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with them both) said:“I have never heard any better definition of ‘small faults’ [al-Najm 53:32] than that which Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) narrated from the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): ‘Allaah has decreed for every son of Adam his share of zinaa, and there is no way to escape from it. The zinaa of the eye is a glance, the zinaa of the tongue is speaking, and the zinaa of the mind is wishing and hoping; then the private part either acts upon this or it does not.’” (Reported by al-Bukhaari, 11/26; Muslim, 4/2046).
Al-Bukhaari included this hadeeth in a chapter entitled Baab zinaa al-jawaarih doon al-farj (Chapter on the zinaa of faculties other than the private part).
Al-Haafiz Ibn Hajar (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: “Zinaa is not always associated with the private part itself, but may involve other faculties such as the eyes and so on.” Ibn Battaal (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: “Looking and speaking are called zinaa because they lead to real zinaa. This is why he said that the private part either acts upon this or it does not”
Zinaa is one of the forbidden deeds, one of the most serious major sins (kabaa’ir) after shirk and murder. Allaah says (interpretation of the meanings):
“And those who invoke not any other god along with Allaah, nor kill such life as Allaah has forbidden, except for just cause, nor commit illegal sexual intercourse – and whoever does this shall receive the punishment. The torment will be doubled to him on the Day of Resurrection, and he will abide therein in disgrace; except those who repent and believe and do righteous deeds, for those Allaah will change their sins into good deeds, and Allaah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.” [al-Furqaan 25:68-70]
“And come not near to unlawful sexual intercourse. Verily, it is a faahishah [anything that transgresses its limits – a great sin], and an evil way (that leads one to Hell unless Allaah forgives him).” [al-Isra’ 17:32]
Imaam al-Qurtubi (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: “The ‘ulama’ said that the phrase And come not near to unlawful sexual intercourse is more eloquent than merely saying ‘Do not commit zinaa’, because the meaning is, Do not even come close to zinaa.” This means not doing any deed that may get close to zinaa or lead to it, such as being alone with a member of the opposite sex, touching, looking, going to evil places, speaking in a haraam manner to a woman to whom one is not related, thinking about and planning immoral acts, and so on.
‘Abd-Allaah ibn Mas’ood said: “I asked the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), ‘Which sin is worst in the sight of Allaah?’ He said, ‘To make any rival to Allaah, when He has created you.’ I asked, ‘Then what?’ He said, ‘To kill your child for fear that he will eat with you.’ I asked, ‘Then what?’ He said, ‘To commit zinaa with the wife of your neighbour.’” (Reported by al-Bukhaari, 8/492; Muslim, 1/90).
All religions are agreed that zinaa is haraam; no religion allows it. The punishment for zinaa is the most severe of punishments, because it violates people’s honour and lineages.
The sin of zinaa may be of varying degrees, and the gravity of the offence depends on the nature and circumstances of the deed, although all zinaa is haraam, a major sin and an act of immorality. Zinaa with a mahram [i.e., incest] (Allaah forbid) or with a married woman is far worse than zinaa with a woman to whom one is not related or with an unmarried woman, because it involves violating the rights of the husband, contaminating his bed, attributing a child to him that is not his, and other kinds of offence and harm. If her husband is a neighbour, the crime of being a bad neighbour is added to the offence; if her husband is one's brother or relative, the crime of breaking family ties is added.
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:" He will not enter Paradise whose neighbour is not safe from his evil actions.” (Reported by Muslim, 1/68). There is no evil action worse than zinaa, and if the husband is absent for the sake of Allaah, such as in worship, seeking knowledge or jihaad, then the sin is compounded.
Buraydah (may Allaah be pleased with him) reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The wives of the mujaahideen are as sacred and forbidden to those who stay behind as their own mothers. There is no man of those who stay behind who is entrusted by one of the mujaahideen with the care of his family and then betrays him (by committing zinaa), but he will be detained on the Day of Resurrection, and (the one whom he betrayed) will take as much of his good deeds as he wishes. So what do you think?” (Reported by Muslim, 3515).
If the adulterer is married, the sin is greater, and the punishment is stoning, and if he is an old man, the sin is greater and the punishment is as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) mentioned in the hadeeth about the three whom Allaah will neither look at nor praise on the Day of Resurrection, and who will have a painful punishment.” (Saheeh Muslim, 156). If the deed is also committed during a sacred month or in a sacred place or at a time which is special in the sight of Allaah, the sin is compounded.
The fuqaha’ (may Allaah have mercy on them) stated that the basic act of zinaa which carries the punishment is illegal sexual intercourse, whereby the two “circumcised parts” [i.e. genitals] come together and there is penetration of the tip of the penis, because this is actual penetration (which carries the prescribed hadd or punishment).
A person must avoid evil deeds and everything that can lead to them. Allaah has commanded us to avoid the traps of the Shaytaan, because if a man takes one step in that direction, his shaytaan and his own ego (nafs) will keep urging him to do evil until he commits immoral deeds.
One should think about how serious it is to touch a woman to whom one is not related, as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) explained: “If one of you were to be stabbed in the head with a piece of iron it would be better for him than if he were to touch a woman whom it is not permissible for him to touch.” (Reported by al-Tabaraani; see also Saheeh al-Jaami’, 5045).
This refers to the punishment for touching, so how about worse deeds, such as embracing and kissing, and even worse kinds of illicit activity? The Muslim qaadi is empowered to stipulate an appropriate punishment for every proven action other than actual intercourse; in the case of intercourse, the punishment set out by Islam is one hundred lashes and a year’s exile for one who is unmarried, and stoning for one who is married. This is the punishment in this world, and the punishment in the Hereafter is far more severe.
One of the important principles which the salaf (may Allaah have mercy on them) pointed out is that the sincere believer who truly hopes for Allaah and the Hereafter should not look at whether the sin is major or minor, or whether is carries a punishment (hadd) or not. It was reported that Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with them both) said: “There is no major sin if one asks for forgiveness, and there is no minor sin if one persists in repeating it.” Someone else said: “If you want to disobey Allaah, do not think about the smallness of the sin, think about the greatness of the One Whom you are disobeying.”
With regard to the matter of repentance from zinaa, please refer to the book "I Want to Repent, But...", …”, under the heading Books on this website. May Allaah bless our Prophet Muhammad.
Islam Q&A (www.islam-qa.com)
Walaikum Assalam,
Ok, first and foremost I think that person, whoever it may be :rolleyes:, needs to stop and self reflect. I can already see a lot of problems with this. You said, "before getting into Islam 100%" That seems to me as if he knew what he was doing was wrong and but still continued in the hopes that one day he will change. Which is a very wrong attitude because death can come any minute! He should fear Allah (swt) and really, repent first!
Second of all, having a relationship with a woman is not allowed in Islam! Other than that she is your sister in Islam. So in my opinion, if he is going into Islam 100% then he needs to well just marry her and try to get her to get into Islam 100% too or if this hurdle is so big, as in family disapprovals or something else than he should cut all the ties with this woman he in "love" with.
Thirdly, he has been in this relationship with this woman for a few YEARS! So I'm guessing its a gf/bf relationship and I don't want to assume the worst, but my mind can't get off it. Also if you in only two months this guy has decided to marry elsewhere, how strong is their "love" to begin with?? I mean from a few years to a few month? So I really don't think he should try to marry a more religious person and end up destroying her life too. You said "Who would you get married to", so I assume he already found that "practicing" Muslim.
In conclusion, I think that person should stop all this nonsense business. Stop running around woman. And get himself straighten out. Turn to Allah (swt) and ask for repentance! Turn to Allah (swt) and if he is sincere and wants to "turn to Islam 100%" then give 100% first to ISLAM then think about getting married. I means up to him really, but if he REALLY wants to get married now, he should try to marry the person he was in "love" with and then improve together. If not, end the relationship, period with all Women and just focus on his deen. <-- Thats what I would do "IF" I was in that position. Just my 2 Cents.
regards to your comment about 'how strong there love in in the first place' they were young and naive, and didnt know what was right and what was wrong!
Guy is into his deen 100% and regrets what has happened in the past!
They're both now unchaste, so don't deserve anyone but each other (or similar). He says he wants a practicing sister, why should he get a chaste sister since he isn't? And that first girl is now damaged goods, so she shouldn't be put back into circulation.
They made their bed, now they should lie in it (intentional pun:D).
I agree 100%, circumstances like the parents not agreeing are a big problem, and now the girl has been put off! so maybe the girl is under a question mark on what she is really like? weak etc etc
Tjhe brother in his post said this
1. What I want to know is what if a guy (muslim) before getting into islam 100%, before knowing of the consequences, is in a relationship with a muslim girl,
The key word here is "before" ..
There are countless brothers and sisters in this situation.. This brother and sister for what ever reason (and that really is no business of ours) did not marry. and now they have parted.
it sounds like the brother is now practicing and wants to marry again. I am assuming he has repented his past and is now looking to his future.. so do we hold his past against him and say he has no right to find a sister who is practicing.. if he himself is practicing?
and no one says they are unchaste anyway.. this is pure speculation. We can only discuss based on what we have been told.
The brother wants to remarry .. he has admitted the sister is not yet out of his mind. but from my point of view, the fact he is willing to move on is a sign that he is trying to put the past behind and move to his future and with a sister who this time he can join with in a halal way ..
May Allah help him
100% true again! but what if they are both unchaste??
Serves them right. What some fail to realise is that if someone repents, its between them and Allah *swt* and no one else. If these two kids messed about when they were younger, they shouldn't have and now they will live with that memory for the rest of their lives.
Let it be a lesson to the next generation.
Too many good practising Muslims suffer in this world, or live unhappy lives. It's only fair that those who break the rules and live to their hearts content have life smack them in the face later on.
Mujib, these two should have married and made it a priority no matter what. If he still has feelings for her, then it only further empowers that thought. It's not a good idea marrying someone else when you have your mind and heart somewhere else, he will regret it I promise you.
:wswrwb: firstly he has to repent sincerely and never return to the sin before he can marry anyone, as said in Quran fornicators are for the fornicators and having an illicit relationship with a woman is haram, wether they are having intimate relations or not. So he wont be eligable as a muslim to marry anyone untill he repents sincerely,may Allah accept it amin, in regards to the first woman if she is a muslim, and she does not repent for what she has done and return to islam, then he cannot marry her anyway.
In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful
And come not near to the unlawful sexual Intercourse.
Verily, it is a Faahishah [(i.e. anything that transgresses its limits
(a great sin)], and an evil way (that leads one to Hell unless Allah forgives him).
[Quran, Al-Israa' (17):32]
Is zinaa intercourse only?
Question:
I need further information about the verse interpreted here about adultery. Adultery, according to the Hudood I read, require penetration. Is that true of Islamic law?
Are married persons, or single for that case, indulging in immoral acts that do not include penetration (but maybe oral sex), exempted from this punishment?
Secondly, is there a forgiveness for adultery? Or for what I inquired in my previous question.
I'd be greatly obliged to recieve an answer, because this issue has confused me for a long time.
Answer:
Praise be to Allaah.
Zinaa, in Arabic, means immorality, and is used with two meanings in shar’: a general meaning and a specific meaning.
The general meaning includes that which carries the punishment (hadd) and that which does not carry it. Islam does not give the name of zinaa only to that which carries the punishment, which is just one of many types of zinaa. Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with them both) said:“I have never heard any better definition of ‘small faults’ [al-Najm 53:32] than that which Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) narrated from the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): ‘Allaah has decreed for every son of Adam his share of zinaa, and there is no way to escape from it. The zinaa of the eye is a glance, the zinaa of the tongue is speaking, and the zinaa of the mind is wishing and hoping; then the private part either acts upon this or it does not.’” (Reported by al-Bukhaari, 11/26; Muslim, 4/2046).
Al-Bukhaari included this hadeeth in a chapter entitled Baab zinaa al-jawaarih doon al-farj (Chapter on the zinaa of faculties other than the private part).
Al-Haafiz Ibn Hajar (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: “Zinaa is not always associated with the private part itself, but may involve other faculties such as the eyes and so on.” Ibn Battaal (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: “Looking and speaking are called zinaa because they lead to real zinaa. This is why he said that the private part either acts upon this or it does not”
Zinaa is one of the forbidden deeds, one of the most serious major sins (kabaa’ir) after shirk and murder. Allaah says (interpretation of the meanings):
“And those who invoke not any other god along with Allaah, nor kill such life as Allaah has forbidden, except for just cause, nor commit illegal sexual intercourse – and whoever does this shall receive the punishment. The torment will be doubled to him on the Day of Resurrection, and he will abide therein in disgrace; except those who repent and believe and do righteous deeds, for those Allaah will change their sins into good deeds, and Allaah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.” [al-Furqaan 25:68-70]
“And come not near to unlawful sexual intercourse. Verily, it is a faahishah [anything that transgresses its limits – a great sin], and an evil way (that leads one to Hell unless Allaah forgives him).” [al-Isra’ 17:32]
Imaam al-Qurtubi (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: “The ‘ulama’ said that the phrase And come not near to unlawful sexual intercourse is more eloquent than merely saying ‘Do not commit zinaa’, because the meaning is, Do not even come close to zinaa.” This means not doing any deed that may get close to zinaa or lead to it, such as being alone with a member of the opposite sex, touching, looking, going to evil places, speaking in a haraam manner to a woman to whom one is not related, thinking about and planning immoral acts, and so on.
‘Abd-Allaah ibn Mas’ood said: “I asked the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), ‘Which sin is worst in the sight of Allaah?’ He said, ‘To make any rival to Allaah, when He has created you.’ I asked, ‘Then what?’ He said, ‘To kill your child for fear that he will eat with you.’ I asked, ‘Then what?’ He said, ‘To commit zinaa with the wife of your neighbour.’” (Reported by al-Bukhaari, 8/492; Muslim, 1/90).
All religions are agreed that zinaa is haraam; no religion allows it. The punishment for zinaa is the most severe of punishments, because it violates people’s honour and lineages.
The sin of zinaa may be of varying degrees, and the gravity of the offence depends on the nature and circumstances of the deed, although all zinaa is haraam, a major sin and an act of immorality. Zinaa with a mahram [i.e., incest] (Allaah forbid) or with a married woman is far worse than zinaa with a woman to whom one is not related or with an unmarried woman, because it involves violating the rights of the husband, contaminating his bed, attributing a child to him that is not his, and other kinds of offence and harm. If her husband is a neighbour, the crime of being a bad neighbour is added to the offence; if her husband is one's brother or relative, the crime of breaking family ties is added.
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:" He will not enter Paradise whose neighbour is not safe from his evil actions.” (Reported by Muslim, 1/68). There is no evil action worse than zinaa, and if the husband is absent for the sake of Allaah, such as in worship, seeking knowledge or jihaad, then the sin is compounded.
Buraydah (may Allaah be pleased with him) reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The wives of the mujaahideen are as sacred and forbidden to those who stay behind as their own mothers. There is no man of those who stay behind who is entrusted by one of the mujaahideen with the care of his family and then betrays him (by committing zinaa), but he will be detained on the Day of Resurrection, and (the one whom he betrayed) will take as much of his good deeds as he wishes. So what do you think?” (Reported by Muslim, 3515).
If the adulterer is married, the sin is greater, and the punishment is stoning, and if he is an old man, the sin is greater and the punishment is as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) mentioned in the hadeeth about the three whom Allaah will neither look at nor praise on the Day of Resurrection, and who will have a painful punishment.” (Saheeh Muslim, 156). If the deed is also committed during a sacred month or in a sacred place or at a time which is special in the sight of Allaah, the sin is compounded.
The fuqaha’ (may Allaah have mercy on them) stated that the basic act of zinaa which carries the punishment is illegal sexual intercourse, whereby the two “circumcised parts” [i.e. genitals] come together and there is penetration of the tip of the penis, because this is actual penetration (which carries the prescribed hadd or punishment).
A person must avoid evil deeds and everything that can lead to them. Allaah has commanded us to avoid the traps of the Shaytaan, because if a man takes one step in that direction, his shaytaan and his own ego (nafs) will keep urging him to do evil until he commits immoral deeds.
One should think about how serious it is to touch a woman to whom one is not related, as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) explained: “If one of you were to be stabbed in the head with a piece of iron it would be better for him than if he were to touch a woman whom it is not permissible for him to touch.” (Reported by al-Tabaraani; see also Saheeh al-Jaami’, 5045).
This refers to the punishment for touching, so how about worse deeds, such as embracing and kissing, and even worse kinds of illicit activity? The Muslim qaadi is empowered to stipulate an appropriate punishment for every proven action other than actual intercourse; in the case of intercourse, the punishment set out by Islam is one hundred lashes and a year’s exile for one who is unmarried, and stoning for one who is married. This is the punishment in this world, and the punishment in the Hereafter is far more severe.
One of the important principles which the salaf (may Allaah have mercy on them) pointed out is that the sincere believer who truly hopes for Allaah and the Hereafter should not look at whether the sin is major or minor, or whether is carries a punishment (hadd) or not. It was reported that Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with them both) said: “There is no major sin if one asks for forgiveness, and there is no minor sin if one persists in repeating it.” Someone else said: “If you want to disobey Allaah, do not think about the smallness of the sin, think about the greatness of the One Whom you are disobeying.”
With regard to the matter of repentance from zinaa, please refer to the book "I Want to Repent, But...", …”, under the heading Books on this website. May Allaah bless our Prophet Muhammad.
Islam Q&A (www.islam-qa.com)
Asiya, you and your examples lol..very good
Serves them right. What some fail to realise is that if someone repents, its between them and Allah *swt* and no one else. If these two kids messed about when they were younger, they shouldn't have and now they will live with that memory for the rest of their lives.
Let it be a lesson to the next generation.
Too many good practising Muslims suffer in this world, or live unhappy lives. It's only fair that those who break the rules and live to their hearts content have life smack them in the face later on.
Mujib, these two should have married and made it a priority no matter what. If he still has feelings for her, then it only further empowers that thought. It's not a good idea marrying someone else when you have your mind and heart somewhere else, he will regret it I promise you.
Kal-el, what if the guy wanted to marry her no matter what but now the girl has backed off now 100%, claiming its nt a good idea, parents, etc etc...false promises by her??
He has feelings for the girl but thinks he deserves someone more practising because he has now become practising? :confused: but yet he claims he loves the one he has been with for so many years?!? eehh... ookkk.. and what kind of hurdle is this that cant be overcome? Isnt there any way around it? Its completely unfair of him to pursue something with someone else until he is over the girl he "loves" :rolleyes: Or until things have completely been resolved between them.
What they did or what he got up to is between him and Allah (swt). But dont drag some poor innocent girl into the mess.
Kal-el, what if the guy wanted to marry her no matter what but now the girl has backed off now 100%, claiming its nt a good idea, parents, etc etc...false promises by her??
Then she doesn't want to marry the guy. Hence she has no feelings for him, hence he is wasting his emotions and energy - consequently he should forget her and move on with his life and give that love to someone more deserving.
Then she doesn't want to marry the guy. Hence she has no feelings for him, hence he is wasting his emotions and energy - consequently he should forget her and move on with his life and give that love to someone more deserving.
BUT make sure he is over her before getting involved in someone else for the purpose of marriage. Its not fair if hes gona be on the rebound and in the end finds he cant or isnt over his feelings. Not fair on any potential i mean.
Thanks people good posts...
vBulletin® v3.7.2, Copyright ©2000-2008, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.