ღThe heart misses youღ

[*IslamicGirl*]

:start:

:salams

Marriage topic with a slight twist.

When you first get married, how do you cope with being so far away from your family- some even move countries with no family relative there at all.. and they feel really lonely :ahb: :crying:

How does one cope? Obviously you do, Allah does not burden a soul more than it can bear but By Allah,don't you feel these pangs of loneliness and feel weepy?

I do :crying:
I miss my family loads tonight and i don't want to call them and tell them i miss them cuz they'll be worried but i'm sure people have experienced this?

How do you manage? Do you still remmeber those feelings i.e. these feelings you experienced were ages ago yet still hold a vivid memory when you reflect?

Is it just sisters that experience this? Or do we experience it more cuza we're females?

:crying:

:wswrwb:

[bint]

lol

sorry I don't mean to laugh at you! I mean..I'm just remembering something I said to my mother the other day :p

I told her 'I'm not staying here in England when I get married' She was like 'nooo problemoo, ull still miss me' and I said 'maybe' I was just teasing her when I said that.

I guess you do miss you're family, but tis part of life. My fav words :- Life goes on :)

[*IslamicGirl*]

:start:

:salams

Opposite our house is our garage, i think maybe it can be converted into a house? :p

:wswrwb:

[bint]

:start:

:salams

Opposite our house is our garage, i think maybe it can be converted into a house? :p

:wswrwb:
lol ure going through a patch..where you are going to miss people..:o

[*IslamicGirl*]

:start:

:salams

lol ure going through a patch..where you are going to miss people..:o

it gets worse you mean? :crying:

Suppose it does ~sigh~

Tis life sis :love:

:wswrwb:

[$HugoBoss$]

I cried so much when my elder sister moved out, you guys have no idea. The tears wouldn't stop, i didn't want her to leave, i love her so much :inlove:. It hurts when i need to talk to someone and she's not around :(

I talk on the phone and on facebook but it's not the same. One time last summer i missed her so much, i booked a ticket the same night and went to see her, came back after a week lol. Dad was mad but i bought him his very chocolates :D

[.: Anna :.]

sis have u got married??
insha allah u will cope with this, remember its not like u are really seperated from ur parents because u can still see them, and call them and everything dont feel like they have been removed out of ur life. if ur very sad, try to think about the time when u will see them soon and look forward to it, and also remember the blessings that Allah gave you. now in addition to just ur own parents and siblings and family, Allah gave u a husband and a whole other family on his side aswell. Nothing has been taken away from u, but rather u have gained :love:
If you are feeling like this, maybe you can talk to ur husband and tell him how u feel, and he can help you to feel better. Dont think he would have to be offended that you miss ur family, its not a reflection about how u feel about him or his family.. its just natural especially when u are very attached to ur family before marriage.

[*IslamicGirl*]

:start:

:salams


Sis, not married yet :)

If i do... he can buy the garage off my parents :D (i kid)

I'm jus away from family atm, it's hard :(

:wswrwb:

[GuCcI]

I cried so much when my elder sister moved out, you guys have no idea. The tears wouldn't stop, i didn't want her to leave, i love her so much :inlove:. It hurts when i need to talk to someone and she's not around :(

I talk on the phone and on facebook but it's not the same. One time last summer i missed her so much, i booked a ticket the same night and went to see her, came back after a week lol. Dad was mad but i bought him his very chocolates :D


awwwwwwww will my brothers do that???? :crying: i think theyre too cheap to care :(

[Zesty]

Wa-alaikum salaammmm!

I was gona sayyyy Islamic Girlyyy are you married?!?! :inlove: :hidban: but i just read no but youre just saying if in the future.
I take it youre back? :p whats with you coming and going.. i mean i want you to stay permanently but stop to-ing and fro-ing!

And did you have to put up this thread :crying: its gona make me cry! :crying: Its hard enough.. i know what sister Anna said is right but :crying:

[*IslamicGirl*]

:start:

:salams

Wa-alaikum salaammmm!

I was gona sayyyy Islamic Girlyyy are you married?!?! :inlove: :hidban: but i just read no but youre just saying if in the future.
I take it youre back? :p whats with you coming and going.. i mean i want you to stay permanently but stop to-ing and fro-ing!

And did you have to put up this thread :crying: its gona make me cry! :crying: Its hard enough.. i know what sister Anna said is right but :crying:

Yes, kid of back :) i couldnt just ask you guys to mak Dua, fulfill the purpose and leave, that would make me feel like i was using you guys and i adore you people too much to do that :love:

I'm not staying permanently as life needs to be explored, don't want to feel restricted but we'll see how it goes :insha:

And sis Laa Tahzan- Don't be sad,not only is it a great phrase to say and reflect upon but it reminds me that an amazing sister on this forum sent me via the post an amazing book with the same title- :jkk: sis Anna :love: - (i gave it to a friend whose reading it as i kept talking about it to everyone! :p )

:wswrwb:

[.: hayat :.]

:)i understand u but after a while u get accustom with the situation and u have a hubby with whom u share all,worries and happy moments,and maybe u have also his family close...for me it is the 2nd year since i am alone,without any family member and no hubby..when i was 17 yrs dad moved to other country,at 20 yrs mum went to dad,at 21 my sister moved there also...so the only one who stay here is me..u get accustom as i did inshallah...:)

[beamz]

I know it sounds hard but i think both girls/boys get affected the same, in time you'll make new friends and get used to your situation calling your family will make you feel better but make you feel sad too.

[.: Anna :.]

:start:

:salams


Sis, not married yet :)

If i do... he can buy the garage off my parents :D (i kid)

I'm jus away from family atm, it's hard :(

:wswrwb:

oh okay. cos u kno b4 u said ur gna tell me something (which btw u didnt tell me!) then i saw this thread n i was like omggg she got married! i really thought!!

[*IslamicGirl*]

:start:

:salams

oh okay. cos u kno b4 u said ur gna tell me something (which btw u didnt tell me!) then i saw this thread n i was like omggg she got married! i really thought!!

Nah, you know i wouldn't marry in the month of Muharram but yep i do need to talk to you, i'm away from home now ukhtee but when i get home i'll give you a buzz InshaAllah

:wswrwb:

[Cristiana]

I must be really abnormal:o

When I got married I had already lived in another country from my whole family for 4 years.

Everytime I have to leave to go visit them (about a weekend every 2 months?) I cry my eyes out because I don't want to leave (my husband/my freedom to express my religion/my freedom in general/MY LIFE...).

I love my family dearly and enjoy seeing them and we speak quite extensively on the phone about twice a week, but I must say I have never known what feeling homesick is:o

[MMS]

the realities of marriage feel more like a test rather than something joyus :(

i hate change!!! :crying:

[*IslamicGirl*]

:start:

:salams

the realities of marriage feel more like a test rather than something joyus :(

i hate change!!! :crying:

Ditto sis but change is what we have to face, willing or not.

Willing is easier you don't cut yourself yourself up so bad.

You cut, i bleed

:wswrwb:

[Noor_Usman]

Asalamalikum.

Well to be honest I don't know exactly how you feel because I had to leave home at 18yrs old :o It was either that or move with my mum and younger bro to her Bf's house but have to sleep on the sofa every night because there weren't enough bedrooms :rolleyes: (you probably guessed their not muslims - but in case you hadn't they're not ;) )

But even though I have been living apart from both parents for the last 4yrs I still miss their company :( I sort of forget about them but every few months I realise how long it was since I saw them and it makes me sad. What makes me sadder is that I know I don't go out of my way to visit them (dad about 3-4 times a year and mum 2-3 times a year) because it's just really awkward. Even though they never kicked up a fuss about me becoming Muslim or anything like that, there's just conversations you don't want them to have in your presence :rolleyes: and the houses can be a right dump to the point I wash everything before I eat with it even though it has come straight out of the drawer :rubeyes: and you feel harsh about it because at the end of the day they're your family but now you are kinda disgusted by some parts of their lives :o

So lol yea sorry to ramble....I do miss my parents and my little brother, we live about 100+ miles away from them. But if truth be told it's probably better for us that me and my husband spend so much time together and it really helps me appreciate his family who are over an 8hr flight away but will drop everything for us :inlove: They have definately become an extention of my own family and to be honest I rely on them more :up:

Give it time and inshallah you will see them as your own and they will fill the gap :D

[bint]

Give it time and inshallah you will see them as your own and they will fill the gap :D


mashaAllah..You sure live upto ure signature..

It's so true and beautiful. :)