Remorse

[Sinner]

Salaam to all. Before you start judging me, I need to get a few things out of my chest.

I was brought up in a Muslim country. But went abroad for my studies. I was living by myself and eventually I got sucked into the North American culture. I made a few friends. Before I knew it, [mod edit: there's no need to reveal your sins brother, its better that you hide them] Eventually I lost my faith in God. For a while, I was a complete atheist. But one night for no reason, I had this flash in my mind which made me wonder what I was doing! I was a changed man from the very next day. After finishing my studies, I came back to my country. I am a practicing Muslim mashallah. I am also getting married in a matter of days. My bride to be is from a very pious family and days away from our wedding I am feeling like I'm not worthy for her. She does not know about my notorious past. But I wont be able to live with myself if I don't tell her about it. I'm also afraid that I might loose her if I tell her.

Please advice.

[Cashew]

Salaam to all. Before you start judging me, I need to get a few things out of my chest.

I was brought up in a Muslim country. But went abroad for my studies. I was living by myself and eventually I got sucked into the North American culture. I made a few friends. Before I knew it, [mod edit: there's no need to reveal your sins brother, its better that you hide them] Eventually I lost my faith in God. For a while, I was a complete atheist. But one night for no reason, I had this flash in my mind which made me wonder what I was doing! I was a changed man from the very next day. After finishing my studies, I came back to my country. I am a practicing Muslim mashallah. I am also getting married in a matter of days. My bride to be is from a very pious family and days away from our wedding I am feeling like I'm not worthy for her. She does not know about my notorious past. But I wont be able to live with myself if I don't tell her about it. I'm also afraid that I might loose her if I tell her.

Please advice.

I'm unclear as to why you believe your sins to be so extraordinarily special.

If you have confessed your sins to God and sincerely repented of them, you have no reason to dwell upon them. In fact, Muslim teaching would have you hide them.

But I think something other than your past sins is bothering you.

You must immediately consult a scholar whom you trust.

[AbuSadiq]

Salaam to all. Before you start judging me, I need to get a few things out of my chest.

I was brought up in a Muslim country. But went abroad for my studies. I was living by myself and eventually I got sucked into the North American culture. I made a few friends. Before I knew it, [mod edit: there's no need to reveal your sins brother, its better that you hide them] Eventually I lost my faith in God. For a while, I was a complete atheist. But one night for no reason, I had this flash in my mind which made me wonder what I was doing! I was a changed man from the very next day. After finishing my studies, I came back to my country. I am a practicing Muslim mashallah. I am also getting married in a matter of days. My bride to be is from a very pious family and days away from our wedding I am feeling like I'm not worthy for her. She does not know about my notorious past. But I wont be able to live with myself if I don't tell her about it. I'm also afraid that I might loose her if I tell her.

Please advice.

As salaamu Alaikum!

Brother, there is all indication that you are now a sincere repenter. But mind you, shaytan may play with ur little intelligent and reverse you back through other means, unfortunately. What is expected of you is to hide your sins. Two, keep praying that Allah guide you to be more consistent with ibadah (worship). Feel free with her. It is part of Allah's blessings that he granted you such a "pious" lady, and on no account must you tell her, especially now. Just be confident that, sin-wise, you are only aswerable to Allah and not her. And even if you are to tell her, let it be after some years, then you can narrate it, story-wise.

Please, control your hert and DO NOT ALLOW THE DEVIL TO MISLED YOU ONCE AGAIN. ALLAH FORGIVES ALL THAT PASTS AND WILL NEVER EVER CATCH OR QUERY YOU ABOUT IT.

May he continue to guide us altogether, amin.

Abdallah

[sister ltd]

I think the most important thing is that you have put the past well and truly behind you. You must concentrate on the future and making sure you stay on the right path. I'm not sure about telling your wife about your past. In any case, if she understands the religion of Islam and if she is pious she will know that we make mistakes along the way and as long as you have repented and turned away from committing those sins then she will not be interested in what you did in the past. Its what you do now and in the future thats important.

[anon52345]

if the sins involved something like fornication that could have health implications, make sure you have a thourough medical investigation with tests for all STDs and stuff so if you did have something it could be treated then and not passed on to your future family inshaAllah.

[ummbilal]

Salaam to all. Before you start judging me, I need to get a few things out of my chest.

I was brought up in a Muslim country. But went abroad for my studies. I was living by myself and eventually I got sucked into the North American culture. I made a few friends. Before I knew it, [mod edit: there's no need to reveal your sins brother, its better that you hide them] Eventually I lost my faith in God. For a while, I was a complete atheist. But one night for no reason, I had this flash in my mind which made me wonder what I was doing! I was a changed man from the very next day. After finishing my studies, I came back to my country. I am a practicing Muslim mashallah. I am also getting married in a matter of days. My bride to be is from a very pious family and days away from our wedding I am feeling like I'm not worthy for her. She does not know about my notorious past. But I wont be able to live with myself if I don't tell her about it. I'm also afraid that I might loose her if I tell her.

Please advice.

Brother we muslims dont confess our sins we beg Allah to keep them covered, if you tell your wife you will poison your marriage, its the shaitan trying to come between u both already, better leave the past where it is and cry your tears of remorse to Allah alone.

[Pippin1376]

Salaam to all. Before you start judging me, I need to get a few things out of my chest.

I was brought up in a Muslim country. But went abroad for my studies. I was living by myself and eventually I got sucked into the North American culture. I made a few friends. Before I knew it, [mod edit: there's no need to reveal your sins brother, its better that you hide them] Eventually I lost my faith in God. For a while, I was a complete atheist. But one night for no reason, I had this flash in my mind which made me wonder what I was doing! I was a changed man from the very next day. After finishing my studies, I came back to my country. I am a practicing Muslim mashallah. I am also getting married in a matter of days. My bride to be is from a very pious family and days away from our wedding I am feeling like I'm not worthy for her. She does not know about my notorious past. But I wont be able to live with myself if I don't tell her about it. I'm also afraid that I might loose her if I tell her.

Please advice.

Let the past stay in the past, you don't need to disclose it unless you wish to hurt yourself. What matters is how you are now, you are a practicing Muslim and that is what should matter.

[Tranquillity]

Have your fiance and her family not already asked about your past?

In my opinion it is enough to say that you were not always practising but that you have repented of your sins. No person who fears Allah should then enquire further, nor should you feel the need to divulge any further information unless it would affect others e.g. if you had children that your wife-to-be does not know about.