Confused Sister
06-01-08, 01:18 AM
Salaamz all............. Pray u are all well
i have a situation which im in need of advice to..... im 25 seriously looking to get married, i was engaged from the age of 11 to a family cousin by my grandma, i was young i didnt have a say in this and nor did my mum, my grandma (paternal) did this "rishta" between me and my cuz, my dad was not around when i was growing up, ( i wont say where, but he was "seperated" by law from family, he is around now tho), and so this egagement stuck by over the years. i have never talked to my cuz after this engagement, we used to blank each other when we say each other, thru embaressment mainly.. the issue now is that his family are not mentioning marriage at all, im aware that i am getting older, i have met a islamic brother i wish to take things futher with, i want to get my mum to talk to his mum and to mayb discuss marriage, (Btw i knw of this brother thru an muslim marriage site, have msn'd him, never met he knws of this situation i am in)..... how do i get my mum to get to talk to his mum, how do i approach my family with this issue?
also my family isnt perfect we have a lot of problems, mainly to do with my dads side of family giving my mum grief, and hence us, i worry i will scare him off when he finds out, i want to b honest and upfront as i knw he is seriously looking to get married and soam i.....
i have a lot of worries that i knw i need to get married, have been wanting to for the past 3 years, scared of how ppl will see my family, how that will relate back to me, other familes are picture perfect, mine i love to bits, mum worked hard to bring us up, dad is with us now, but our upbringing was not conventional,
and now i have a stupid engagement that is stopping me from marriage as i knw they are messing me abt!
sorri its late and i needed to put this all down!
take care
w/Salaam
i have a situation which im in need of advice to..... im 25 seriously looking to get married, i was engaged from the age of 11 to a family cousin by my grandma, i was young i didnt have a say in this and nor did my mum, my grandma (paternal) did this "rishta" between me and my cuz, my dad was not around when i was growing up, ( i wont say where, but he was "seperated" by law from family, he is around now tho), and so this egagement stuck by over the years. i have never talked to my cuz after this engagement, we used to blank each other when we say each other, thru embaressment mainly.. the issue now is that his family are not mentioning marriage at all, im aware that i am getting older, i have met a islamic brother i wish to take things futher with, i want to get my mum to talk to his mum and to mayb discuss marriage, (Btw i knw of this brother thru an muslim marriage site, have msn'd him, never met he knws of this situation i am in)..... how do i get my mum to get to talk to his mum, how do i approach my family with this issue?
also my family isnt perfect we have a lot of problems, mainly to do with my dads side of family giving my mum grief, and hence us, i worry i will scare him off when he finds out, i want to b honest and upfront as i knw he is seriously looking to get married and soam i.....
i have a lot of worries that i knw i need to get married, have been wanting to for the past 3 years, scared of how ppl will see my family, how that will relate back to me, other familes are picture perfect, mine i love to bits, mum worked hard to bring us up, dad is with us now, but our upbringing was not conventional,
and now i have a stupid engagement that is stopping me from marriage as i knw they are messing me abt!
sorri its late and i needed to put this all down!
take care
w/Salaam