lil question

[Black_Flag]

are engagements allowed in islam? isnt it jst meant 2 be nikah?

[angel*]

are engagements allowed in islam? isnt it jst meant 2 be nikah?

I think they are allowed yesh :p

[insomniac]

http://www.islam-qa.com/index.php?ref=67884&ln=eng

Question:
Is it forbidden for muslims to declare the engagement (alkhotoba)? If yes, who are the people supposed to know about the engagement?
Are Close friends allowed to know about it??.

Answer:
Praise be to Allaah.

This hadeeth was narrated by al-Daylami in Musnad al-Firdaws, where it says: “Announce the marriage and conceal the engagement.” This is a da’eef (weak) hadeeth which was classed as such by al-Albaani (may Allaah have mercy on him) in al-Silsilah al-Da’eefah (2494), and in Da’eef al-Jaami’ al-Sagheer, 922.
But the first part of it is saheeh with the word “proclaim.”
Ahmad narrated from ‘Abd-Allaah ibn al-Zubayr (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Proclaim marriages.” This hadeeth was classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Irwa’ al-Ghaleel, 1993.
Proclaiming marriages, in the sense of announcing them and publicizing them, is obligatory according to the majority of scholars, indeed it is one of the conditions of a marriage being valid, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There is no marriage except with a wali (guardian) and two witnesses of good character.” Narrated by al-Bayhaqi from ‘Imraan and ‘Aa’ishah; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’, 7557.
Some scholars regarded it as mustahabb to conceal the engagement for fear of hasad (destructive envy) which could lead to trouble between the man and the family of his fiancée, as stated in Haashiyat al-‘Adawi ‘ala Sharh Mukhtasar Khaleel, 3/167.
This is supported by the words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “Seek help in meeting your needs by keeping quiet, for everyone who is blessed is envied.” Narrated by al-Tabaraani; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’, 943.
This does not apply only to engagement, rather a person should not show openly the blessings that Allaah has bestowed upon him to one who will envy him for that.
With regard to holding engagement parties, this is something that many people do, and there is nothing wrong with that in sha Allaah. But it should be noted that we must adhere to the limits set by sharee’ah in these parties, so there should be no free mixing of men and women, or use of musical instruments apart from the daff, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) allowed use of the daff in wedding parties.
And Allaah knows best.

</SPAN>Islam Q&A

[brjimc]

known engagements are common in Islam.

I dont think there is anything wrong with it. However, I have always heard scholars say that it is not wise to prolong an engagement. Once someone has decided on marriage, they should get married.

[Z-Blade]

:salams,

Here is the Islamic view of engagement as given by scholars:

"Engagement: How Long Can It Be?
Answered by Ustadha Hedaya Hartford, SunniPath Academy Teacher

http://www.sunnipath.com/images/Q_Image.jpg

What does Islam say about engagement: How long can you be engaged to someone before having to marry them?
http://www.sunnipath.com/images/A_Image.jpg
http://www.sunnipath.com/images/bism01.jpg
In the name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate

There is no engagement in Islam as known in the West (such as dating). After having made the decision to marry one's prospective spouse, it is unlawful to spend time with him/her. It is permissible to speak to the prospective spouse as many times as needed in order to make one's decision about marrying them. Once the two have decided to go ahead with the marriage, then the only legal reason to meet after that is to discuss the details of the wedding.

Islamically speaking, the closest thing to engagement is the period after the couple has made the Islamic marriage contract (katbul kitab) before the bride actually moves in with the groom. This period can last as long as the couple wants it to last, because technically they are married, except the marriage has not been officially consummated.

Please see: http://qa.sunnipath.com/issue_view.asp?HD=1&ID=537&CATE=10&redirect=yes

And Allah Most High knows best"

http://qa.sunnipath.com/issue_view.asp?HD=7&ID=12176&CATE=3610

Wassalam.

[MG]

there are no engagements in islam, only nikahs and walimas, engagements are a western concept not a part of islam

[Black_Flag]

Jazakallahu Khair, I thought so...I was just clarifying!

[$HugoBoss$]

I've been engaged for over 9 months and it sucks, better to have nikah right away.

[.: Anna :.]

There is not "engagement" but once someone proposed and accepted then from that time til the nikah happens they are "engaged" even in islam if u look at the meaning of the word to mean like they are taken, not available... because once each accepted that proposal then someone can not come and give their other proposal can they? and it is a formal promise to marry that person, which does have weight because they gave their words for that.
so we do not do parties or celebrate engagement etc, and should not prolong it but to say engagement is nothing whatsoever is not totalllyyyy right because the situation is slightly different for someone "engaged" than not engaged because others can not propose to them etc as i said. It doesnt make the couple like mahrams for each other or nething, as some ppl like to act bt can communicate what is necessary about the wedding in order to prepare etc...

[$HugoBoss$]

There is not "engagement" but once someone proposed and accepted then from that time til the nikah happens they are "engaged" even in islam if u look at the meaning of the word to mean like they are taken, not available... because once each accepted that proposal then someone can not come and give their other proposal can they? and it is a formal promise to marry that person, which does have weight because they gave their words for that.
so we do not do parties or celebrate engagement etc, and should not prolong it but to say engagement is nothing whatsoever is not totalllyyyy right because the situation is slightly different for someone "engaged" than not engaged because others can not propose to them etc as i said. It doesnt make the couple like mahrams for each other or nething, as some ppl like to act bt can communicate what is necessary about the wedding in order to prepare etc...

Yeah but i talk to my fiance on msn sometimes :embar:, i just have to but i know my limits of course :)

[Black_Flag]

There is not "engagement" but once someone proposed and accepted then from that time til the nikah happens they are "engaged" even in islam if u look at the meaning of the word to mean like they are taken, not available... because once each accepted that proposal then someone can not come and give their other proposal can they? and it is a formal promise to marry that person, which does have weight because they gave their words for that.
so we do not do parties or celebrate engagement etc, and should not prolong it but to say engagement is nothing whatsoever is not totalllyyyy right because the situation is slightly different for someone "engaged" than not engaged because others can not propose to them etc as i said. It doesnt make the couple like mahrams for each other or nething, as some ppl like to act bt can communicate what is necessary about the wedding in order to prepare etc...

Yeah thats what i mean..coz i kno of some ppl gettin engaged and there forever round each others house and all that. i was certain thats not allowed.