Medievalist
14-07-07, 07:49 PM
:salams
No-one likes to have their heart-broken, no-one likes to be mocked or belittled or to hear spiteful words. They hurt - sometimes deep. If we dont appreciate this feeling for ourselves then we shouldnt be meting it out to others.
Our Asaatizah say:
kabhi bhi kissa ka dil mat dukhaana
never break another persons heart.
And it's true. We need to be careful about how we behave with our brothers and sisters, sometimes we make them feel this small and we might not even be aware.
Hadrat Mawlana Ashraf Ali Thanwi rahimahullah was a great alim of india in the last century. He has written a great many books and served deen his entire life - may ALLAH ennoble him and grant him mercy, ameen.
Hadrat Thanwi explained once that Islaam is split in 5 sections:
1. Aqaa'id (Doctrine)
2. Ibaadaat (Actions of Worship)
3. Akhlaaq (Moral Character)
4. Aadabal Mu'amalat (Business transactions)
5. Aadabal Mu'asharaat (Social etiquette)
I want to say a few things about Akhlaaq and Aadabul Mu'asharaat. There are clear guidelines in the religion on how we are to build characters of nobility and how we are meant to behave in a social scenario - often times it happens that our ignorance of such matters causes takleef to other people.
For example: it is not permitted for two people to converse in a language which is unkown to the third person in the group. This causes unnecessary tension and difficulty to the other person.
SubhanALLAH! This is the beauty of our deen that it covers all aspects of life.
Going back to hurting anothers heart - we were taught that if someone does something wrong and then feels ashamed over it, we should behave with them as though nothing had even happened. People dont appreciate the feeling of being looked down on, people dont appreciate being reminded of their mistakes when they are already ashamed of them - we behave with them in a manner as though there was no issue. Thats a point we need to note.
Another example - when we see a believer engaging in wrong action then to humiliate and debase him in a gathering is completely incorrect as a first action. It hurts the person and that pain should not be felt by anyone in a gathering.
We come from a wide range of backgrounds. Ethnically, geographically, financially, spirtually etc we are all on different planes, we move in different circles but the teachings of Deen are applicable for all of us. If our character and our personality is not attracting those closest to us to the deen then we need to do muhaasabah and recognise why this is happening. Is it that we portray an incorrect image of deen, is it that we are falling back in our akhlaaq and social etiquette? most likely - yes.
The Buzurgs of the effort mention that the longest speeches of the Sahaabah Karaam in the effort were about half a page long - bas. The sea of humanity who enterred the religion did so seeing the akhlaaq, business transactions, social etiquette of the Sahaabah Karaam. It was only later that the Aqaa'id and Ibaadaat were undertaken by the people - they saw the other three branches of deen first and these are what are most effective in social change.
Today we need examples - we look to our Ulama, our Huffaaz, our Asaatizah, our Buzurgs for leadership and rightly so. But these noble people come from the same dust we come from, they live in the same world we live in - why can it not be that we ourselves become examples for people? Sympathy, compassion, manners, politeness are virtues which build a persons character - perhaps we need to illuminate our own hearts before we can heal the hearts we've broken?
No-one likes to have their heart-broken, no-one likes to be mocked or belittled or to hear spiteful words. They hurt - sometimes deep. If we dont appreciate this feeling for ourselves then we shouldnt be meting it out to others.
Our Asaatizah say:
kabhi bhi kissa ka dil mat dukhaana
never break another persons heart.
And it's true. We need to be careful about how we behave with our brothers and sisters, sometimes we make them feel this small and we might not even be aware.
Hadrat Mawlana Ashraf Ali Thanwi rahimahullah was a great alim of india in the last century. He has written a great many books and served deen his entire life - may ALLAH ennoble him and grant him mercy, ameen.
Hadrat Thanwi explained once that Islaam is split in 5 sections:
1. Aqaa'id (Doctrine)
2. Ibaadaat (Actions of Worship)
3. Akhlaaq (Moral Character)
4. Aadabal Mu'amalat (Business transactions)
5. Aadabal Mu'asharaat (Social etiquette)
I want to say a few things about Akhlaaq and Aadabul Mu'asharaat. There are clear guidelines in the religion on how we are to build characters of nobility and how we are meant to behave in a social scenario - often times it happens that our ignorance of such matters causes takleef to other people.
For example: it is not permitted for two people to converse in a language which is unkown to the third person in the group. This causes unnecessary tension and difficulty to the other person.
SubhanALLAH! This is the beauty of our deen that it covers all aspects of life.
Going back to hurting anothers heart - we were taught that if someone does something wrong and then feels ashamed over it, we should behave with them as though nothing had even happened. People dont appreciate the feeling of being looked down on, people dont appreciate being reminded of their mistakes when they are already ashamed of them - we behave with them in a manner as though there was no issue. Thats a point we need to note.
Another example - when we see a believer engaging in wrong action then to humiliate and debase him in a gathering is completely incorrect as a first action. It hurts the person and that pain should not be felt by anyone in a gathering.
We come from a wide range of backgrounds. Ethnically, geographically, financially, spirtually etc we are all on different planes, we move in different circles but the teachings of Deen are applicable for all of us. If our character and our personality is not attracting those closest to us to the deen then we need to do muhaasabah and recognise why this is happening. Is it that we portray an incorrect image of deen, is it that we are falling back in our akhlaaq and social etiquette? most likely - yes.
The Buzurgs of the effort mention that the longest speeches of the Sahaabah Karaam in the effort were about half a page long - bas. The sea of humanity who enterred the religion did so seeing the akhlaaq, business transactions, social etiquette of the Sahaabah Karaam. It was only later that the Aqaa'id and Ibaadaat were undertaken by the people - they saw the other three branches of deen first and these are what are most effective in social change.
Today we need examples - we look to our Ulama, our Huffaaz, our Asaatizah, our Buzurgs for leadership and rightly so. But these noble people come from the same dust we come from, they live in the same world we live in - why can it not be that we ourselves become examples for people? Sympathy, compassion, manners, politeness are virtues which build a persons character - perhaps we need to illuminate our own hearts before we can heal the hearts we've broken?