need advice asap :(

[a sista]

aslaam u alaikum

i'm a 17 yr old sista and fully practicing hamdulilah but the thing is, i dnt think i can control my sexual desires anymore, i really wana have sex :$, im scared i mite commit a sin very soon as i dnt think i can control them any longer. marriage is not an option, my parents wud flip if i told them i wantd to get married as im v. young, and if they ever did agree (highly unlikly) they'll make me get married to sum1 from pakistan which i'll never agree to. so what do i do?
i've a couple of times slipt into haraam talk wid the opsite sex to get sexual excitiment and im scrd this will happen again.

so what do i do? thrzz so much fitnah around, everywer u look therz sex being protryd, it's in ur face most of time. i reg attend zhikr gthrings, mehfils etc and try to be in good company and avoid being alone, but when im alone thts when it kicks in.

plz help me.

jazkamulah kahyr.

[UZMA KHALID]

salam sister

You are young and you need to be more careful, as we are muslims, i wish you will get married soon, and you will be saved from sins, remeber to pray 5 times a day.

may Allah swt help you sis.

i hope someone will write more, to help you sis



bye

[.: Anna :.]

wa alaykum salam

sister there becomes a point wen marriage becomes compulsory on someone, this is when u get to the stage like what u have described... insha allah you have to talk to your parents and get the point accross that you are in need to get married (i dont mean tell them like this, obviously noone says to their parents in this way.) Seventeen is not young actually its fine for marriage. But you have to prepare your self for the responsibilities of marriage aswell its not just a way to fulfil ur desire and thats it.. obviously you need to be prepared to be a good wife insha allah.
If you are not willing to get married or have difficulty in persuading ur parents then until u are able, rasoolallah :saw: advised to fast.. so why dnt u fast each monday and thursday or if still not enough then do fast every other day.
other thing is dont talk to ne guys or spend any time with them, dont keep them as ur friends at all. because u realise ur in this kind of situation its more dangerous for u than for an average person to keep friends of the opposite sex, and its not allowed to do anyway. but if u dnt know ne guys then despite if u feel like this, if u dnt know ne1 its gna be impossible for u to go and commit zina anyway so keep away from ne boys which u know :S
if u have the problem wen r are alone why dnt u take the quran and read, it shud change ur mood from that, and if it doesnt then turn 2 surat an noor and read from the beginning wat Allah tells us about the zany and the zania insha allah...

[UZMA KHALID]

salam sister


may Allah swt help you sis

i wish you get married very soon and you will be saved from sins, remember to pray 5 times a day and do other holy stuff, so my mind does'nt think about other stuff, and i hope someone will give you more information, to help you.


bye



bye

[OBL]

and try to be in good company and avoid being alone, but when im alone thts when it kicks in.

Try not being alone den, always be with someone (A FEMALE).

so what do i do? thrzz so much fitnah around, everywer u look therz sex being protryd, it's in ur face most of time

True, but can't use that as an excuse to commit zina,we all livin in that society. it's all down to you how strong your iman is to fight the devil, cuz on Qiyamah you cant blame the devil, cuz all he's gonna say is i whispered and he obeyed. You gonna let the devil['s whispers enter you into hell. He's already gonna go jannah, he dont care.

[neelu]

The issue is not necessarily the fact that we're surrounded by fitnah and temptation. Rather the issue is that we need to be mentally stronger to withstand it. You're already taking positive steps by trying to keep with good company and read Quran etc. Fasting regularly is also supposed to help contain the desires. Avoid chick flicks, bollywood movies and most music cos' those are the things that try to lure you even when you're not even noticing it. The fact that these feelings hit you when you're on your own is not necessarily a bad thing- in a lot of ways that's quite normal. It would however become a problem if you acted upon those feelings or tried to do something with someone. When you see pious Muslims who avoid these matters very strictly, don't assume that they find it easy or take this matter likely... it's quite possible that at some point in their lives they were in your shoes and alhamdullilah got through it and overcame that even though while they were in that dilemma they thought it would be impossible to get through.

Put your trust in Allah (swt). He (swt) doesn't give you a burden greater than you can bear, which means He (swt) has chosen to test you regarding your desires and it is a test which He has made passable for you alhamdullilah. Make dua to seek Allah's (swt) help and read a translation of Surah Yusuf. It is only the whisperings of shaytan which try to convince you in your own mind that passing the test is impossible and like a struggle through torture which you can't manage when the truth is that you can but at the time it seems hard. What helped me in my late teens was that I had a couple of close friends who I could talk to about everything and they said that if I felt at anytime that I might get out of control then I could call them and talk things through, even if it's 2am.

You gonna let the devil['s whispers enter you into hell. He's already gonna go jannah, he dont care.

He is? :confused::scratch:

[.: Anna :.]

He is? :confused::scratch:

no :rubeyes:

[OBL]

He is?

omg, :smack: no no he gonna go to Jahanam.(hell)

[aisha2007]

aslaam u alaikum

i'm a 17 yr old sista and fully practicing hamdulilah but the thing is, i dnt think i can control my sexual desires anymore, i really wana have sex :$, im scared i mite commit a sin very soon as i dnt think i can control them any longer. marriage is not an option, my parents wud flip if i told them i wantd to get married as im v. young, and if they ever did agree (highly unlikly) they'll make me get married to sum1 from pakistan which i'll never agree to. so what do i do?
i've a couple of times slipt into haraam talk wid the opsite sex to get sexual excitiment and im scrd this will happen again.

so what do i do? thrzz so much fitnah around, everywer u look therz sex being protryd, it's in ur face most of time. i reg attend zhikr gthrings, mehfils etc and try to be in good company and avoid being alone, but when im alone thts when it kicks in.

plz help me.

jazkamulah kahyr.

Asalaam Alaikum

You may think you are too young for marriage but your body is telling you that you are not. So you need to talk to your mum if you can't alk to her then the closest female member of the family you have.
The excuse that sex is in your face most of the time is just that....an excuse. I live in an area where people are walking around half naked because of the heat....but I manage to contain myself....remember that shaytan is around you all of the time just waiting for you to stray.
You have had good advice so far....so the best thing you can do? Get married if you can't control yourself. For now spend as much time as you can in salat and reading Islamic books. We have all been where you are, Its normal to face the temptation....but you have to protect your deen.

[RashidD]

Sister try and close the doors to many of the activities of fitnah, such as contact with the opposite sex and/ or viewing them in the form of magazines and TV (especially).

[Al Qadr]

When you can't control your ages and there is a risk of commiting zina it becomes compulsory for you to get married (I am sure I heard this in a marriage talk)

Talk to your parents and get married :insha:

Also try spending more of your time if possible reading/listening to Quran, in Islamic circles and keep yourself busy with work etc.

[a sista]

aslaam u alaikum

i'm too scared to approch my parents about marriage or anything of the sort, me and mum dnt share the typical mother n daughter relationship, we aint close at all. im fairly close wid my sisters but i cud never tell them anything like this. they dnt have a clue, no1 does. i have no real close frends hu i can talk to hence why i've cum here. i guess i feel a lil lonely @ times and wnt sum1 to love me and make me feel wantd and speacial.
i no i cnt use all this fitna as an excuse but my iman is so weak, @ tymes i'm on a real spirtual high n @ times im so low, so low tht i wana self harm, when i think of all the bad stuff ive done, it makes me sik.
im gona be college bk in sept n i now this will all kik in agen, the urges hav calmd down alot cz im mostly at home but when i leave the home thts when the troubles start. i no i cnt blame any1 but myself, but i cnt help it. my imaan is so weak. insha'allah i will start fasting reg. n try to pray more but... what am i mena do when the time of the month comes? salah is the only thing that keeps me going n wen i cnt pray im open to all sorts of attacks.

plz remembr me in ur dua's.

[Rosey]

Get married, that's the only way ur sexual desires are gona get filled. If ur scared that your gona fall into sin do sumthing about it now. but u have to be ready to take on the role as a wife. marriage isn't all about intercourse, therz a lot more to it. 17 is not a young age at all, speak to your parents and let them no the score. Other than that, stay away from guys and remain in dhikr.

[stephenoskie]

walikum Assalaam

when you get these desires try say the kalimah or audzhu billahee minushaytaan nirrajeem bismillah irrahmar nirraheem.

sowi I cant spell it but I hope you get the drift this works trust me, Some times I feel the same way as you but I just sya this and it goes away I promise. any more help PM me