algharib
11-06-07, 04:33 PM
55 Ways To Attain a Happy Marriage
1. Remember that short separations (days) away from the wife may
strengthen the marriage bonds, but long separations (weeks, months) will
weaken and harm the relationship.
2. You should understand and be considerate of the physiological nature
of the female makeup so that you can properly deal with your affairs
together, without distress or difficulties.
3. Don’t allow for disputes of one day to last until the next day.
4. Avoid talks about past relationships, previous engagements, or
marriages.
5. Stay away from idealism, and live your way naturally, and don’t expect
miracles to come your way.
6. Convey your love and warm feelings to your wife whenever you can.
7. You must not submit yourself to anxieties and worries, and always be
optimistic with a smiling face.
8. Beware of arguments and harsh criticism about every minor and major
incident.
9. Always try to confine the dispute in a small narrow circle, and don’t
allow it to expand, and be in control of the dispute before it goes out of
control.
10. Jealousy, suspicions and doubts are enemies. Always deal with reality
and stay away from suspicions and fictions.
11. Plant self-confidence in your partner’s mind and trust in him/her ...
make him/her feel contempt and self-satisfied.
12. It is not enough that you marry a compatible person, you must be
compatible as well.
13. Cleanliness is essential for Emaan and a symbol of love.
14. Compromise on some of the issues which you consider dear to you, so
that you can love the qualities your partner has.
15. Look after your partner in the same way you look after yourself, and
love to him that which you love for yourself.
16. Accept the principle of give and take ... and don’t be self-centred in
order to take more than you give, or take everything.
17. The man wants his wife to be ideal and be able to deal with all matters
with goodness, and give him unconditional love. The woman wants her
husband to have a strong personality and be able to suffice all her needs,
and she wants to be sure that she is the last woman in his life.
18. Don’t rush into blaming your partner for every incident, instead
assume half the responsibility and don’t try to predict the unseen.
19. Live your day and don’t think about the worries of tomorrow (a day
which has not come), and act within your capabilities.
20. It is your duty to try and understand the sanctity of marriage. It is a
very strong institution, so pause for a moment before you take a step after
which regrets will be of no value.
21. Although love is an essential and important part of marriage, don’t
solely rely on love as a basis to the marriage.
22. You should be an example to your partner, and let your good actions
tell and convey your personality.
23. Don’t allow room for your relatives and neighbours to interfere
between the two of you and try to solve your problems amongst
yourselves as much as possible.
24. Don’t rush into correcting faults that you perceive in your partner.
There are things and habits which can only change with time, and don’t
exaggerate small matters, making them into large disputes.
25. You must understand and accept marital responsibilities and
consequences with a content heart and inner-satisfaction.
26. Be very cautious to avoid disputes amongst yourselves, and be sure
not to humiliate nor embarrass your partner.
27. Work together with your husband and engage yourselves in collective
duties; this will strengthen your bonds and creates good memories
thereafter.
28. Allow opportunities for your spouse to freely express him/herself. Be
an admirer of his/her ambitions, and do not be sarcastic nor undermine
his/her capabilities.
29. The financial rights must be respected. It should not be taken lightly as
this is among the major causes of marriage disputes.
30. Don’t engage your spouse with your sorrows, and try your best to
overcome them yourself. But be sure not to forget her in your happy
occasions.
31. Dear wife!!! Beware of allowing your female friends to interfere in
your private life, even if they were to advise you.
32. Make your husband feel that he is the ideal person you have always
wished for, and you are proud of him and admire his personality.
33. Remember the good qualities of your spouse whenever a dispute
emerges between the two of you, and don’t let his/her shortcomings
occupy your mind so that you may forget his/her good qualities.
34. Ask yourself these questions, so that you can recognize the goodness
and the inner-beauty of your partner and successfully overcome your
disputes. What does each of you find attractive in the other? - What are
the happily special occasions you spent together? - What collective
activities you enjoy doing together? - What does each of you do to show
his/her care to the other? - What each of you does to show his love and
respect to the other? - What are your common future goals?
35. Dear wife!!! Avoid the use of hurtful and disgraceful expressions
during marriage disputes, otherwise you may lose your husband.
36. You will gain the love of each other by exchanging gifts with each
other ... let this be a symbol of your married life upon every happy event.
37. The intelligent wife is the one which chooses the proper time to ask for
her needs and the needs of the children and chooses the appropriate timeto express her thoughts about the behaviour of her husband ... sometimes
the time which you choose may not be suitable ... think twice!
38. ‘My dignity’ ... ‘my pride’ ... these are the words of shaitaan which he
inserts in the hearts of the spouses during the dispute to cover their
assumed responsibility and ensures that they stay in dispute ... why
should the spouses allow for this and let shaitaan be in charge!?
39. Don’t ignore the presence of your spouse ... mutual consultation
(shuraa) is very important for marriage life ... each must feel that he is an
important contributor to married life.
40. Don’t leave or run away whenever there is dispute ... running away is
not a method to solve disputes. It is wise to allow for several moments of
silence and then come together to solve the dispute.
41. Don’t bother your husband with multiple questions that are of no
concern to you, or inquiring on secrets or matters that your husband
doesn’t wish to disclose to you. This may lead the husband to leave the
house and go seek some solace elsewhere.
42. Don’t leave your husband and seek to stay alone, but be near to him
and engage with him whenever you can.
43. If you are a working wife, remember that your first duty is your
household. Seek to accommodate both matters in the best way.
44. Don’t show anger when your in-laws come to visit the home, instead
be a good example of reception with a warm welcoming hospitality, and
be assured that these actions tell your husband much about you and your
manners.
45. Dignify and respect your mother-in-law and call her with names that
are most beloved to her. Don’t try to dispute with her, and always
mention her son with goodness in front of her.
46. The neighbour and the neighbour ... this is the advice of the prophet
(pbuh), so deal with the neighbours in good manners, reminding and
helping them with matters of worship, and participating in their
happiness and sorrows ... this is what our beautiful deen has requested us
to do.
47. Persisting differences of opinion is likely to result in differences of the
hearts, so be in agreement with your husband sometimes even if you
aren’t truly convinced. Be reminded that it is no obedience in which there
is disobedience to Allah ... obey your husband in matters of goodness and
good advices.
48. You can achieve the quiet atmosphere that the husband needs at home
by engaging the children in games that stimulate their minds ... like
building blocks, etc.
49. Your children are a great grace and a precious gift ... don’t allow them
to be miserable because of your shortcomings and your engagement in
other ill-priorities.
50. Learn about the stages of child development and the ways to best deal
with your children accordingly. Avoid those adverse triggers that may have great consequences on your child’s health and psychological wellbeing.
51. Be a strong support to your husband on matters of deen and worship,
and ask for the hereafter in the same way you ask for this life.
52. Extravagancy corrupts marriage ... it fades the grace of Allah and
makes it disappear ... and Allah doesn’t like those whom are extravagant.
But be wise in your dealings and don’t ever feel the need for others.
53. True happy marriage doesn’t mean the disappearance of disputes,
instead it means your wise ability to solve those disputes together and not
to allow them to interfere with the relationship between you and your
spouse.
54. Beware of disputes with your husband in the presence of the children,
or raising your voice in their presence. Before anything, the children first
learn from examples and blind imitation ... these disputes will be
programmed in the child’s mind with potential consequences thereafter.
55. Don’t allow anyone to interfere with your personal life and do not
permit a reason for interference in the first instance ... avoid sharing the secrets of your household with friends or close relatives.
1. Remember that short separations (days) away from the wife may
strengthen the marriage bonds, but long separations (weeks, months) will
weaken and harm the relationship.
2. You should understand and be considerate of the physiological nature
of the female makeup so that you can properly deal with your affairs
together, without distress or difficulties.
3. Don’t allow for disputes of one day to last until the next day.
4. Avoid talks about past relationships, previous engagements, or
marriages.
5. Stay away from idealism, and live your way naturally, and don’t expect
miracles to come your way.
6. Convey your love and warm feelings to your wife whenever you can.
7. You must not submit yourself to anxieties and worries, and always be
optimistic with a smiling face.
8. Beware of arguments and harsh criticism about every minor and major
incident.
9. Always try to confine the dispute in a small narrow circle, and don’t
allow it to expand, and be in control of the dispute before it goes out of
control.
10. Jealousy, suspicions and doubts are enemies. Always deal with reality
and stay away from suspicions and fictions.
11. Plant self-confidence in your partner’s mind and trust in him/her ...
make him/her feel contempt and self-satisfied.
12. It is not enough that you marry a compatible person, you must be
compatible as well.
13. Cleanliness is essential for Emaan and a symbol of love.
14. Compromise on some of the issues which you consider dear to you, so
that you can love the qualities your partner has.
15. Look after your partner in the same way you look after yourself, and
love to him that which you love for yourself.
16. Accept the principle of give and take ... and don’t be self-centred in
order to take more than you give, or take everything.
17. The man wants his wife to be ideal and be able to deal with all matters
with goodness, and give him unconditional love. The woman wants her
husband to have a strong personality and be able to suffice all her needs,
and she wants to be sure that she is the last woman in his life.
18. Don’t rush into blaming your partner for every incident, instead
assume half the responsibility and don’t try to predict the unseen.
19. Live your day and don’t think about the worries of tomorrow (a day
which has not come), and act within your capabilities.
20. It is your duty to try and understand the sanctity of marriage. It is a
very strong institution, so pause for a moment before you take a step after
which regrets will be of no value.
21. Although love is an essential and important part of marriage, don’t
solely rely on love as a basis to the marriage.
22. You should be an example to your partner, and let your good actions
tell and convey your personality.
23. Don’t allow room for your relatives and neighbours to interfere
between the two of you and try to solve your problems amongst
yourselves as much as possible.
24. Don’t rush into correcting faults that you perceive in your partner.
There are things and habits which can only change with time, and don’t
exaggerate small matters, making them into large disputes.
25. You must understand and accept marital responsibilities and
consequences with a content heart and inner-satisfaction.
26. Be very cautious to avoid disputes amongst yourselves, and be sure
not to humiliate nor embarrass your partner.
27. Work together with your husband and engage yourselves in collective
duties; this will strengthen your bonds and creates good memories
thereafter.
28. Allow opportunities for your spouse to freely express him/herself. Be
an admirer of his/her ambitions, and do not be sarcastic nor undermine
his/her capabilities.
29. The financial rights must be respected. It should not be taken lightly as
this is among the major causes of marriage disputes.
30. Don’t engage your spouse with your sorrows, and try your best to
overcome them yourself. But be sure not to forget her in your happy
occasions.
31. Dear wife!!! Beware of allowing your female friends to interfere in
your private life, even if they were to advise you.
32. Make your husband feel that he is the ideal person you have always
wished for, and you are proud of him and admire his personality.
33. Remember the good qualities of your spouse whenever a dispute
emerges between the two of you, and don’t let his/her shortcomings
occupy your mind so that you may forget his/her good qualities.
34. Ask yourself these questions, so that you can recognize the goodness
and the inner-beauty of your partner and successfully overcome your
disputes. What does each of you find attractive in the other? - What are
the happily special occasions you spent together? - What collective
activities you enjoy doing together? - What does each of you do to show
his/her care to the other? - What each of you does to show his love and
respect to the other? - What are your common future goals?
35. Dear wife!!! Avoid the use of hurtful and disgraceful expressions
during marriage disputes, otherwise you may lose your husband.
36. You will gain the love of each other by exchanging gifts with each
other ... let this be a symbol of your married life upon every happy event.
37. The intelligent wife is the one which chooses the proper time to ask for
her needs and the needs of the children and chooses the appropriate timeto express her thoughts about the behaviour of her husband ... sometimes
the time which you choose may not be suitable ... think twice!
38. ‘My dignity’ ... ‘my pride’ ... these are the words of shaitaan which he
inserts in the hearts of the spouses during the dispute to cover their
assumed responsibility and ensures that they stay in dispute ... why
should the spouses allow for this and let shaitaan be in charge!?
39. Don’t ignore the presence of your spouse ... mutual consultation
(shuraa) is very important for marriage life ... each must feel that he is an
important contributor to married life.
40. Don’t leave or run away whenever there is dispute ... running away is
not a method to solve disputes. It is wise to allow for several moments of
silence and then come together to solve the dispute.
41. Don’t bother your husband with multiple questions that are of no
concern to you, or inquiring on secrets or matters that your husband
doesn’t wish to disclose to you. This may lead the husband to leave the
house and go seek some solace elsewhere.
42. Don’t leave your husband and seek to stay alone, but be near to him
and engage with him whenever you can.
43. If you are a working wife, remember that your first duty is your
household. Seek to accommodate both matters in the best way.
44. Don’t show anger when your in-laws come to visit the home, instead
be a good example of reception with a warm welcoming hospitality, and
be assured that these actions tell your husband much about you and your
manners.
45. Dignify and respect your mother-in-law and call her with names that
are most beloved to her. Don’t try to dispute with her, and always
mention her son with goodness in front of her.
46. The neighbour and the neighbour ... this is the advice of the prophet
(pbuh), so deal with the neighbours in good manners, reminding and
helping them with matters of worship, and participating in their
happiness and sorrows ... this is what our beautiful deen has requested us
to do.
47. Persisting differences of opinion is likely to result in differences of the
hearts, so be in agreement with your husband sometimes even if you
aren’t truly convinced. Be reminded that it is no obedience in which there
is disobedience to Allah ... obey your husband in matters of goodness and
good advices.
48. You can achieve the quiet atmosphere that the husband needs at home
by engaging the children in games that stimulate their minds ... like
building blocks, etc.
49. Your children are a great grace and a precious gift ... don’t allow them
to be miserable because of your shortcomings and your engagement in
other ill-priorities.
50. Learn about the stages of child development and the ways to best deal
with your children accordingly. Avoid those adverse triggers that may have great consequences on your child’s health and psychological wellbeing.
51. Be a strong support to your husband on matters of deen and worship,
and ask for the hereafter in the same way you ask for this life.
52. Extravagancy corrupts marriage ... it fades the grace of Allah and
makes it disappear ... and Allah doesn’t like those whom are extravagant.
But be wise in your dealings and don’t ever feel the need for others.
53. True happy marriage doesn’t mean the disappearance of disputes,
instead it means your wise ability to solve those disputes together and not
to allow them to interfere with the relationship between you and your
spouse.
54. Beware of disputes with your husband in the presence of the children,
or raising your voice in their presence. Before anything, the children first
learn from examples and blind imitation ... these disputes will be
programmed in the child’s mind with potential consequences thereafter.
55. Don’t allow anyone to interfere with your personal life and do not
permit a reason for interference in the first instance ... avoid sharing the secrets of your household with friends or close relatives.