View Full Version : Does Skin Colour Matter?????
$HugoBoss$
24-02-07, 12:07 AM
Well does it matter to you because a lot of muslim brothers these days want to marry muslim girls with very fair skin which i think is wrong. Most of you will say it doesn't matter as long as he/she is pious with a positive character and thats how it should be but if there were two identical girls/guys one light skin and the other dark skin would you close your eyes and pick one or say skin colour doesn't matter but if i had to choose it would be ________
I was talking with my cousin today and she got a marriage proposal and she rejected the guy because he was to dark skinned because she's white like a ghost. I asked her is that not being biased??? She's like skin colour doesn't matter to me it's just my personal preference i was like :scratch: She's dumb thats all i can say about her.
I don't want to offend anyone it's just a thought...........
Chained_Water
24-02-07, 12:09 AM
No it does not matter at all.
Not one little bit.
Nope.
.: Anna :.
24-02-07, 12:11 AM
No it does not matter at all.
Not one little bit.
Nope.
I agree totally. Its a stupid thing to a base decision upon!
i also say its stupid but it does have an effect, if its sum1's personal preferance and they are givin the oppertunity of 2 identicle people only diff, one light skinned one dark, its come to what that person likes i guess, coz remember one of the 4 charateristics is beuty right so if u happen to like light skinnned people more then thats you..but personally dark or light it dont matter!!!
Asalama alaykum wr wb
I will Be Honest, skin color doesnt matter, people are people yes
however i dont think those who have certain preferences should be i dont know whats the word but they shouldnt be made to feel bad.
after all the intention behind the preference makes a big difference no?
Personally i am not attracted to jet pale white brothers nor am i attracted to jet black/blue brothers. but then again thats a general statement regarding my preference it does change depending on the features. also even if it doesnt, it doesnt mean i dont love them for the sake of allah nor does it mean i would stand in the way of family, friends or my own children in the future if they preferred what i dont prefer.
There is a thin line between preference and discrimination, we should acknowledge that.
yes its stupid to dismiss a brother who was pious due to such preferences.and when put in that position i didnt, i think diin, aqlaaq, etc are all better criterias to judge by. however the other criterias are also allowed they are just not reccomended above the diin criteria.
The same way i prefer taller brothers to short
i prefer brothers who are mid way in complexion. however it doesnt matter if a particular bro didnt meet this preference, i disagree with shalow people who dismiss brothers and sisters based on them not meeting minor preferences like the one i mentioned.
if anyone is going to comment on my post, pls re read it, understand it and see where am coming from, i hate people posting replies misunderstanding my initial point.
I am not a racist nor a tribalist, i just have a particular preference.
which when other important things over shadow it i would disregard it (preference).
peace
Nusayba
24-02-07, 12:42 AM
I agree with anna & CW here, what a shallow way of being attracted to someone subhanaAllah.
You can choose someone for their good looks its permissable but what has skin colour got anything to do with being attractive physically. The prophet (saw) said pick the pious woman, but placing your decision solely on how light her skin colour is pretty retarded.
It's whats underneath the skin that matters everything else meaningless.
Ignatius F. Peace
24-02-07, 12:47 AM
...of course not ...
Is there anything in any of the holy books that say so? .... coffee, caramel, mocha, milk ... skin tones are beautiful ...
I'm speckled by the way .... :up:
I've found people that are extremely sensitive over this, even talking about it.
Like Quest said above, people's preferences can be based on any physical aspect such as their eyes, their height, their weight, their lips, their physique and even their complexion. More than often, the idea of skin colour as a preference can automatically fall into the 'racist' bracket, that's why people have an extra layer of sensitivity regarding it.
It's not always as simple as "skin colour"; it could mean just their complexion. I.e. are they dark, are they light? And sometimes it can very well mean "are they black or white?".
I can understand why some people are sensitive about even mentioning the skin aspect (because of its links with racism), but everyone has their own preference - and as long as that preference is not judgemental, then there isn't nothing wrong with it IMO. Every man and woman on this Earth has an image of their ideal partner, there's nothing wrong in describing that image.
But with this complexion thing; it's ancient. Every culture thinks the lighter the complexion, the more attractive, especially in regards to women - I hear alot of Muslim women are dismissed because their complexion isn't light enough for the man's preference :scratch:
But this talk is all based on looks. There's more to being a husband/wife than looks - they fade away in time.
i also say its stupid but it does have an effect, if its sum1's personal preferance and they are givin the oppertunity of 2 identicle people only diff, one light skinned one dark, its come to what that person likes i guess, coz remember one of the 4 charateristics is beuty right so if u happen to like light skinnned people more then thats you..but personally dark or light it dont matter!!!
heres the problem tho, what makes light skin women the definition of beauty?
i have seen some darker sisters with much better features then some light skin sisters.
features is what symbolises 'beauty' IMO
but i do believe based on what i see that color does compliment beauty.
hence why darker people use powder to look a bit lighter
and white people get tans.
there is a reason behind why they do this, after all beauty is relative and everyone has their definition of whats beauty.
heres the problem tho, what makes light skin women the definition of beauty?
i have seen some darker sisters with much better features then some light skin sisters.
features is what symbolises 'beauty' IMO
but i do believe based on what i see that color does compliment beauty.
hence why darker people use powder to look a bit lighter
and white people get tans.
there is a reason behind why they do this, after all beauty is relative and everyone has their definition of whats beauty.
Sis, I think it's because darker colours is seen as more masculine and hence why it's associated with men, and not women.
It's the same sentiment as to why most women would want a taller husband. It's all preference.
Kal like i said, there is a thin line between preference and discrimination.
this thin line can be seen when the intention behind the preference is made known.
many people dislike these topics because it brings sensitivities to come to surface. these sensitivities are due to the train of thought the subject produced. in my opinion, unless the intention behind such subjects or the one stating their view in such subjects isnt made clear, the whole subject can become controversial, in that many people will respond to the subject based on an implication they derived from whats said, an implication by the way not neccessarily pointed to by the text in itself, but rather presumptions made abt the text.
i have seen this happen many times, the above is based on observations i have made in the past.
Peace
abdusamad
24-02-07, 01:02 AM
I have an honest question for people.
I hear about skin color, but in many countries there are same ethnic people with same language, same culture with two different skin colors....
If you were a kashmiri pakistani light skin bro would you marry a darker pakistani sister? and vice versa...
even from where I come from (somalia) we are ONE people but yet you would be suprised the differen shade of skin color there is amongst us.
Skin color is not the issue in most cases, what it tends to be is people's fanatic obsession with their foreign traditions of looking down at people from different cultures.. its disgusting.
and not last of all, its also unislamic.
Sis, I think it's because darker colours is seen as more masculine and hence why it's associated with men, and not women.
It's the same sentiment as to why most women would want a taller husband. It's all preference.
lol more masculine? Now thats a 1st i have never heard this b4 are u serious?
i thought some chicks liked taller men because its an old fashioned mindset . some people are under the notion that the man must be taller and older than the woman. i have never heard the woman must be fairer then the men, this isnt an old fashioned mindset its a mindset which mainly became widespread during the colonial times.
I have an honest question for people.
I hear about skin color, but in many countries there are same ethnic people with same language, same culture with two different skin colors....
If you were a kashmiri pakistani light skin bro would you marry a darker pakistani sister? and vice versa...
even from where I come from (somalia) we are ONE people but yet you would be suprised the differen shade of skin color there is amongst us.
Skin color is not the issue in most cases, what it tends to be is people's fanatic obsession with their foreign traditions of looking down at people from different cultures.. its disgusting.
and not last of all, its also unislamic.
I think somalis have more problems inregards to tribalism then skin color.
abdusamad
24-02-07, 01:06 AM
I think somalis have more problems inregards to tribalism then skin color.
I honestly believe skin color plays little role in people's mind. On the other hand i believe it is different cultures which people dislike and as a result tend to take it out on the person instead of his culture.
lol more masculine? Now thats a 1st i have never heard this b4 are u serious?
i thought some chicks liked taller men because its an old fashioned mindset . some people are under the notion that the man must be taller and older than the woman. i have never heard the woman must be fairer then the men, this isnt an old fashioned mindset its a mindset which mainly became widespread during the colonial times.
Like you said, colour emphasies beauty, or if not colour, atleast different shades. I think colour or too much colour can be seen as feminine.
Ask most boys what their favourite colour is and what do you think they'll answer? Now compare the colours they tell you with the colours the girls would prefer...they would like the brighter, more colourful ones better right?
I don't know whether or not it's natural, or social, but males prefer lack of colour or atleast darker shades of colour - the opposite to the women. So it may not be masculine literally, but that preference is ultimately what seperates the two when we talk about colour.
Most women want their husbands to be taller because that is seen as more masculine; because of the physical presence. Physical power/presence = masculine, because it's mainly predominantly a male attribute.
And most husbands would prefer wives as tall, or shorter than them. Same reason, they don't want a physical presence or they think shorter wives is more 'feminine'.
It's the same concept with the skin complexion aspect. It's unacceptable that you can judge someone based on their appearance, there's no question in that - but prefering something over another doesn't automatically mean you intend on discriminating the opposite of your preference.
I honestly believe skin color plays little role in people's mind. On the other hand i believe it is different cultures which people dislike and as a result tend to take it out on the person instead of his culture.
Well I haven't come across any Somali's having an exclusive preference towards appearance...tribalism however..
Ask most boys what their favourite colour is and what do you think they'll answer? Now compare the colours they tell you with the colours the girls would prefer...they would like the brighter, more colourful ones better right?
I don't know whether or not it's natural, or social, but males prefer lack of colour or atleast darker shades of colour - the opposite to the women. So it may not be masculine literally, but that preference is ultimately what seperates the two when we talk about colour.
lol these 2 paragraphs contradict each other, when i read the 1st i was thinking in line with the second. but i get ur point. so wont over analyse :D
Yea sorry, I meant the girls would prefer the brighter in the 1st para..
salaam
hmm... i think culture has a big influence. some cultures believe the more fair a woman's complexion is, the more beautiful she is. u can hav small eyes and a fat nose but as long as ur fair u r considered to be beautiful. :rolleyes:
even though a darker skinned person can hav more attractive facial features, the colour of skin i guess dominates over features :rubeyes:
Irfan GBH
24-02-07, 02:40 AM
salaam
hmm... i think culture has a big influence. some cultures believe the more fair a woman's complexion is, the more beautiful she is. u can hav small eyes and a fat nose but as long as ur fair u r considered to be beautiful. :rolleyes:
even though a darker skinned person can hav more attractive facial features, the colour of skin i guess dominates over features :rubeyes:
Or it western culture it's the opposite, so lets do this: transfer male population of the west to south asia and transfer male population of south asia to the west. Everybody will be happy, insha'allah! :up:
Wouldnt skin colour come under the category of attractiveness? After all, it may be that the person doesn't find dark skin attractive, alongside tiny eyes, huge teeth etc.
And if he/she doesnt find the person attractive because one of the reasons being he/she is dark skinned then that is her/his preference.
Medievalist
24-02-07, 10:53 AM
evry1 has their likes and dislikes
Unique Muslimah
24-02-07, 10:58 AM
Sis, I think it's because darker colours is seen as more masculine
Thas just mean..
Ruprecht
24-02-07, 11:01 AM
It's all good.
As long as they aren't hairier than I am :D
Thas just mean..
I meant no offence but I don't see how it is mean. It may be stereotyping, but it's true. Boys prefer darker colours to represent themselves whereas most girls prefer lighter colours as representations..
Or it western culture it's the opposite, so lets do this: transfer male population of the west to south asia and transfer male population of south asia to the west. Everybody will be happy, insha'allah! :up:
salaam
err... i dono lol. im not talking about just males preferring a fair skinned woman. im talking serious desi culture where a mother will want her son to marry a fair skinned lady rather than a darker one even if she is more educated, etc.
dont even get me started on if u [not YOU but i mean generally speaking] hav a sister or a cousin ur age who is fairer than u :rolleyes: :torture:
it kills the self esteem
PtPeach
24-02-07, 01:35 PM
It could almost be considered close-minded to marry someone because of their skin colored. It think that it is idiocy to to marry someone because of their skin color.
ummbilal
24-02-07, 02:34 PM
skin colour doesnt matter at all, its piety that people need to look at,
ur_yusra
24-02-07, 02:40 PM
Its all about the money.
Its all about the money.
i concur!! :up:
i concur!! :up:
:salams
bravo jolly good sonny jim! :rolleyes:
Chained_Water
24-02-07, 04:14 PM
Its all about the money.
:eek:
:rotfl:
Mustafa_A
24-02-07, 04:14 PM
Nope..not at all...the girl could be brown...white..purple..orange...or all shades of the rainbow..it don't matter. Its about the personality..thats what counts.
ur_yusra
24-02-07, 04:27 PM
Nope..not at all...the girl could be brown...white..purple..orange...or all shades of the rainbow..it don't matter. Its about the personality..thats what counts.
If the girls gone purple - most likely she has hypoxia and eventually respiratory failure so no guarantees she'll be able to attend the wedding.
Its not good news if shes orange either - indicatory of severe jaundice and liver failure which ultimately means death.
Sorry.
cl@rity
24-02-07, 04:33 PM
Personally it dusnt mater at all abt theskin colour, however family does prefer fair skin. It basically depends on ur culture and family. If u were to marry a a dark person then the family wud be like...eeeww hes dark isnt he? Bt it dunt matter to me.
Masumah
24-02-07, 05:02 PM
salaam
hmm... i think culture has a big influence. some cultures believe the more fair a woman's complexion is, the more beautiful she is. u can hav small eyes and a fat nose but as long as ur fair u r considered to be beautiful. :rolleyes:
even though a darker skinned person can hav more attractive facial features, the colour of skin i guess dominates over features :rubeyes:
i agree it happens alot.
personally i prefer darker skin but wen it cums to marriage only the piety matters :)
it definately matters to a lot of people. for example, i have heard my own "type" paki's, say that this paki is too dark, i dont want to marry him/her...
Mustafa_A
24-02-07, 05:12 PM
If the girls gone purple - most likely she has hypoxia and eventually respiratory failure so no guarantees she'll be able to attend the wedding.
Its not good news if shes orange either - indicatory of severe jaundice and liver failure which ultimately means death.
Sorry.
If the bride can't come to the groom..then the groom will go to the bride.. havin a wedding in a hospital room would be something different for sure!
stephenoskie
24-02-07, 05:51 PM
Allah made us all with different skin colours
because each and everyone of us is unique
we are also all equal
so skin colour doesnt matter and the fact that she turned
the proposal down (dnt mean to cause offence) becasue of
his skin colour is well bad she soun ds kind of vain like she is
better than him when in fact she is just as equal as him.
But maybe she had other reasons, im not going to judge her
but you know inshallah she finds some one who makes her happy
Everyone deserves happiness,
question (slightly off topic)
why (in certain prophecies) do they say that imam mahdi will be fair skinned and the dajaal will be dark skinned if the skin colour does not matter?
why are the good guys in prophecies always fair skinned and the bad guys dark skinned?
Hadhrat Abu Saeed Khudri (R.A.) relates that Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam) said, "Al Mahdi will be from my progeny. His forehead will be broad and his nose will be high. He will fill the world with justice and fairness at a time when the world will be filled with oppression. He will rule for seven years." Other ahadeeth inform us that:
* He will be tall
* He will be fair complexioned
* His facial features will be similar to those of Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam)
* His character will be exactly like that of Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam)
* His father's name will be Abdullah
* His mother's name will be Aamina
* He will speak with a slight stutter and occasionally this stutter will frustrate him causing him to hit his hand upon his thigh.
* His age at the time of his emergence will be forty years
* He will receive Knowledge from Allah.
stephenoskie
24-02-07, 05:59 PM
i wana marry a muslim
not a asian muslim or black/white muslim
a muslim
skin colour will and doesnt occur to me,
a good muslim over rides everything :)
Assalamu Alaikum
It does not matter at all as long as they meet with being religious etc.
I married a man purely because of his deen and everytime something bad happens I console myself saying atleast I did it for the sake of Allah so it doesn't matter, whatever is happening is happening for my own good as Allah helped me choose him and he wouldn't do anything bad.
Allah is the most merciful and most kind.
Redmist
24-02-07, 06:47 PM
question (slightly off topic)
why (in certain prophecies) do they say that imam mahdi will be fair skinned and the dajaal will be dark skinned if the skin colour does not matter?
why are the good guys in prophecies always fair skinned and the bad guys dark skinned?
Skin colour does'nt matter. Remember Bilal R.A was black as the night and he has the highest regard in islam.
Redmist
24-02-07, 06:50 PM
Back on topic...personally skin colour does'nt matter to me. Its all about beauty. Like colour has nothing to do with beauty. U see some right ugly white looking people and conversely you can see some right beautiful looking dark people. This colour thing is a misnomer.
Skin colour does'nt matter. Remember Bilal R.A was black as the night and he has the highest regard in islam.
:up:
Back on topic...personally skin colour does'nt matter to me. Its all about beauty. Like colour has nothing to do with beauty. U see some right ugly white looking people and conversely you can see some right beautiful looking dark people. This colour thing is a misnomer.
so we shouldn't get married to ugly people?
so we shouldn't get married to ugly people?
unless u find the ugly people beautiful
Redmist
24-02-07, 07:01 PM
unless u find the ugly people beautiful
Exactly! What might be ugly to me might be beautiful to you and what might be beautiful to me might be ugly to you :up:
unless u find the ugly people beautiful
Exactly! What might be ugly to me might be beautiful to you and what might be beautiful to me might be ugly to you :up:
thats not what i mean, what i mean is, if you find someone ugly who is attracted to you. do you say no to them because they are ugly?
thats not what i mean, what i mean is, if you find someone ugly who is attracted to you. do you say no to them because they are ugly?
Ibn Hajar lists the following characteristics in order of priority when seeking a wife.
1. Religiousness, which takes precedence over everything else.
2. intelligence.
3. a good character and disposition.
4. fertility
5. a good family.
6. virginity
7. beauty
8. some other relevant interest.
marrying someone who u think is ugly (harsh word to use so they mus be like really eww) could lead to a disastrous marriage
scribble
24-02-07, 07:08 PM
I don't like the term 'ugly' no one is ugly, Subhanallah, Allah (swt) created us all beautiful, besides the beauty comes from within.
Redmist
24-02-07, 07:12 PM
thats not what i mean, what i mean is, if you find someone ugly who is attracted to you. do you say no to them because they are ugly?
No.....you say no to them because ur not attracted to them. But obviously you'd say that i dont think we're best suited you dont say im not marrying you because ur ugly!
Ibn Hajar lists the following characteristics in order of priority when seeking a wife.
1. Religiousness, which takes precedence over everything else.
2. intelligence.
3. a good character and disposition.
4. fertility
5. a good family.
6. virginity
7. beauty
8. some other relevant interest.
marrying someone who u think is ugly (harsh word to use so they mus be like really eww) could lead to a disastrous marriage
how on earth you supposed to know the fertility bit? :scratch:
you not ment to go and ask her are you, "excuse me, are you fertile?"...
No.....you say no to them because ur not attracted to them. But obviously you'd say that i dont think we're best suited you dont say im not marrying you because ur ugly!
really?
Redmist
24-02-07, 07:14 PM
how on earth you supposed to know the fertility bit? :scratch:
you not ment to go and ask her are you, "excuse me, are you fertile?"...
No....you can just tell by looking at her ;)
how on earth you supposed to know the fertility bit? :scratch:
you not ment to go and ask her are you, "excuse me, are you fertile?"...
well if a person knows they are not fertile, they should really let their potential spouse know shouldnt they :scratch:
No....you can just tell by looking at her ;)
you can?
scribble
24-02-07, 07:14 PM
Er excuse me. :rubeyes:
Redmist
24-02-07, 07:15 PM
really?
No not really..
well if a person knows they are not fertile, they should really let their potential spouse know shouldnt they :scratch:
ah ok, so you just assume shes fertile if she doesn't say anything...
Redmist
24-02-07, 07:17 PM
you can?
The shape of her body.......etc. Just some of the things to go on.
ah ok, so you just assume shes fertile if she doesn't say anything...
i dont think it would be haraam to ask :scratch:
do u ask questions again n again to annoy me :p
The shape of her body.......etc. Just some of the things to go on.
hmm, this is a serious question, so dont laugh. what should the shape be if she is fertile, and what shape should she be if she is not fertile?
this is all new to me...
i dont think it would be haraam to ask :scratch:
do u ask questions again n again to annoy me :p
yes :p
just messing, comeon MMS, I'm just asking a question, why you getting anoyed?
another quesiton :p
so does he ask you personally or through a wali, and how would you feel if someone asked you that question, i wonder how the brother would feel asking a wali "is she fertile", and i wonder how the wali would feel being asked a quesiton like that?
Redmist
24-02-07, 07:28 PM
hmm, this is a serious question, so dont laugh. what should the shape be if she is fertile, and what shape should she be if she is not fertile?
this is all new to me...
Now ur bugging me are'nt ya!
Just read it somewhere on this forum that fertile looking women would have the 'hourglass' figure. k.......could be wrong and it could all be hearsay but why dont u just ask her if she's fertile. Then there would be no question would there! :torture:
sunrise
24-02-07, 07:29 PM
I don't like the term 'ugly' no one is ugly, Subhanallah, Allah (swt) created us all beautiful, besides the beauty comes from within.
agreed!
Now ur bugging me are'nt ya!
Just read it somewhere on this forum that fertile looking women would have the 'hourglass' figure. k.......could be wrong but why dont u just ask her if she's fertile. Then there would be no question would there! :torture:
probably get a slap across the face for asking that...
Nusayba
24-02-07, 07:32 PM
Beautiy is in the eye of the beholder, I agree with Nis..MashaAllah. How can anyone call Allahs creation ugly? To me there is beauty in all of Allahs creation, even the physically ill subhanAllah.
Redmist
24-02-07, 07:32 PM
probably get a slap across the face for asking that...
Yeh well the tip is that she'd tell ya if she were'nt fertile or she had some problem. Get it? :p
Redmist
24-02-07, 07:35 PM
probably get a slap across the face for asking that...
No you would'nt. You could just ask her if she's got any illnesses or health problems!
Yeh well the tip is that she'd tell ya if she were'nt fertile or she had some problem. Get it? :p
yep
Nusayba
24-02-07, 07:37 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VFsYl1Ic8fA :love:
check again sis sorry!
scribble
24-02-07, 07:37 PM
Sis, the link doesn't work.
Nusayba
24-02-07, 07:40 PM
check again sis nis.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VFsYl1Ic8fA :love:
check again sis sorry!
i like the zain bikha one better :D
scribble
24-02-07, 07:45 PM
check again sis nis.
That's so sad.. :( :crying: Subhanallah..
yes :p
just messing, comeon MMS, I'm just asking a question, why you getting anoyed?
another quesiton :p
so does he ask you personally or through a wali, and how would you feel if someone asked you that question, i wonder how the brother would feel asking a wali "is she fertile", and i wonder how the wali would feel being asked a quesiton like that?
you could just ask if he/she wants children :torture:then if they cant then they should say :spunch:
Nusayba
24-02-07, 07:59 PM
Children come from Allah. My cousin who was told by doctors shes infertile is now pregnant for 5 month. She's been married for 2 years.
You can reject someone for being infertile and marry the fertile and never have children, Allah is the one who grants.
Nis..yes its beautiful isnt it..It always gets me teary!:crying:
you could just ask if he/she wants children :torture:then if they cant then they should say :spunch:
ok, i wasn't gonna ask anyway. just leave it to allah.
hmm, this is a serious question, so dont laugh. what should the shape be if she is fertile, and what shape should she be if she is not fertile?
this is all new to me...
apparently ur supposed to look at her hands according to many scolars, as they indicate the fertility of the body. Too skinny means good chance of infertility and plump hands means good fertility insha Allah I dont know if this opinion is based on any sahih daleel though Allahu alam.
does skin colour matter ? not at all, not even remotely it should be the last thing we notice.
Children come from Allah. My cousin who was told by doctors shes infertile is now pregnant for 5 month. She's been married for 2 years.
You can reject someone for being infertile and marry the fertile and never have children, Allah is the one who grants.
Nis..yes its beautiful isnt it..It always gets me teary!:crying:
very very true, so whats the point of looking or trying to find out if she is fertile?
ok, i wasn't gonna ask anyway. just leave it to allah.
then why u asking all these questions:torture:
then why u asking all these questions:torture:
i'm a VERY curious minded person. just because im not going to do or say something, doesn't mean i don't want to know about it. :)
Am i the only who finds this topic depressing?
Am i the only who finds this topic depressing?
why you finding it depressing bro?
heaven2002
24-02-07, 08:43 PM
apparently ur supposed to look at her hands according to many scolars, as they indicate the fertility of the body. Too skinny means good chance of infertility and plump hands means good fertility insha Allah I dont know if this opinion is based on any sahih daleel though Allahu alam.
does skin colour matter ? not at all, not even remotely it should be the last thing we notice.
come on guys!! the only thing islam asks you to look for is whether that person is a good muslim, not what colour they are or how their body shape might tell you about fertility
:torture:
please dont get married taking these kind of things into consideration. if you want your marriage to be strong surely you should start with islamic intentions when considering propective marriage partners.
Lambo5688
24-02-07, 08:53 PM
aahh my sisters annoy me so much when they are talking about light skinness. They think only the light skinned bros are attractive.
come on guys!! the only thing islam asks you to look for is whether that person is a good muslim, not what colour they are or how their body shape might tell you about fertility
:torture:
please dont get married taking these kind of things into consideration. if you want your marriage to be strong surely you should start with islamic intentions when considering propective marriage partners.
lol hey easy now dont shoot the messenger , im just telling u what the scolars said to look for in regards to fertility, also there is a hadith about how RasoolAllahu salAllahu alleyhi wa salam sent a woman to look at a woman for him for marriage and he told her to smell her teeth and look at the back of her ankles ;) because the prophet SalAllahu alleyhi wa salam also said marry the one who is loving and fertile so masha Allah yes piety deen first then any other considerations anyway back to the topic .....
lol hey easy now dont shoot the messenger , im just telling u what the scolars said to look for in regards to fertility, also there is a hadith about how RasoolAllahu salAllahu alleyhi wa salam sent a woman to look at a woman for him for marriage and he told her to smell her teeth and look at the back of her ankles ;) because the prophet SalAllahu alleyhi wa salam also said marry the one who is loving and fertile so masha Allah yes piety deen first then any other considerations anyway back to the topic .....
smell her teeth? :rofl1: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:
was that a typo sis lol oh my sides hurt from laughter.
(*_Hamzah
24-02-07, 09:16 PM
salaam
hmm... i think culture has a big influence. some cultures believe the more fair a woman's complexion is, the more beautiful she is. u can hav small eyes and a fat nose but as long as ur fair u r considered to be beautiful. :rolleyes:
even though a darker skinned person can hav more attractive facial features, the colour of skin i guess dominates over features :rubeyes:
This is a South Asian phenomenon? Light skinned is considered beautiful and dark skin as hideous, I’m grateful that my forefathers left behind this garbage when they took Shahaadah
why are the good guys in prophecies always fair skinned and the bad guys dark skinned?
Bilal (ra) was black as was Luqman- your theory is baseless.
Ignatius F. Peace
24-02-07, 09:21 PM
I still don't get this thread ... I'm a very light skinned guy married to a dark-skinned Portuguese woman from the Azores ... you oughta see our kids ... :inlove: ...
I still don't get this thread ... I'm a very light skinned guy married to a dark-skinned Portuguese woman from the Azores ... you oughta see our kids ... :inlove: ...
lol i can imagine the beauty.
portuguese women are beautifull. :D
flamin nora, couldnt give a rats @ss
Is this a public poll>? I want to find out who selected the "I'm desperate" option :p
aahh my sisters annoy me so much when they are talking about light skinness. They think only the light skinned bros are attractive.
No they dont..I know of lots of sisters that actually prefer brothers that are more tanned and have a wheatish complexion over fair brothers. Personal preference.
But i think the reason why people want to usually marry someone 'fair' is because they think ahead to 'the next generation'. They think, well if Im, quite dark and I marry someone quite dark, then my kids will turn out dark. But if at least my spouse is fair, there's better chance for kids...
I HATE IT when aunties put down specifics for the daughter in law. I came across this aunty once who's son is very dark in complexion, and and he's saying I will only marry a girl on the basis that she is very beautiful and white. And then he's refusing excellent girls because 'she's not white enough.' She can be a right cow and make his life hell, as long as she is beautiful so he can.. I dunno.. put her on the mantelpiece? :rant:
However come to think of it, the descriptions of the hoor al'ayn in jannah are that of women who are so fair, such that you can see their bone marrow through the skin. So its not surprising brothers may prefer 'fair' sisters, they want to find their own hoor on earth wa'Allahu alam. BUT, the believing women are more beautiful than the hoor al ayn anyway... :inlove:
Preferences are irrelevant. You can meet someone who is the opposite of your preference(s), and end up marrying them.
Preference is superficial, and over-rated. Reading over this thread, I still don't get the meaning of it.
Was it to just ask what skin complexion we prefer? Or to get us to say it is something we consider when looking for a partner?
I don't know, either way there's little meaning in any of it.
So I just don't get it..we might aswell have an 'Dream Hubby/Wife' thread based on what we look for in appearance.
Bilal (ra) was black as was Luqman- your theory is baseless.
my theory? lol
its not a theory, it was a question. a question to question prophecies which make it look like good is white and bad is black, when in islam this should not matter.
Preferences are irrelevant. You can meet someone who is the opposite of your preference(s), and end up marrying them.
Preference is superficial, and over-rated. Reading over this thread, I still don't get the meaning of it.
Was it to just ask what skin complexion we prefer? Or to get us to say it is something we consider when looking for a partner?
I don't know, either way there's little meaning in any of it.
So I just don't get it..we might aswell have an 'Dream Hubby/Wife' thread based on what we look for in appearance.
Preferences yeah..but doesnt mean we will always get them. Everyone prefers any one thing over another, and you're right, you wont always get what you want. But its just like saying, I prefer one type of food over the other, but I dont mind it if I get another. However, its when people say I dislike a certain thing or characteristic which is when things turn ugly. And yes, you will often find that certain people who preferred to marry someone as white as milk (pakis often use that simile, hate it), often give up after a while when they see they cant get it and marry someone else and live happily ever after.
I think the purpose of this thread is for people to confront any prejudice in their hearts as no one likes to admit certain things, but deep down inside we all may have it. It's also to highlight how superficial people are these days, that we should feel sorry for them and continue to make dua that Allah keeps us guided and not let us fall into it. :)
my theory? lol
its not a theory, it was a question. a question to question prophecies which make it look like good is white and bad is black, when in islam this should not matter.
the quran uses similar symbols of bad and good.
ever read verses like and the righteous faces that day will be bright etc
and the wicked dark and gloomy.
orientalists use the type of logic u displayed in your question akii that somehow the prophecies and quranic verses connote racism and what not..
these symbols of good and bad, are metaphors. just like white symbolises purity
it doesnt mean white people are pure literally. etc
this is why i asked are u serious about your question, because usually you are quite insightful so i was baffled as to why u asked that question.
barakallahu feek.
the quran uses similar symbols of bad and good.
ever read verses like and the righteous faces that day will be bright etc
and the wicked dark and gloomy.
orientalists use the type of logic u displayed in your question akii that somehow the prophecies and quranic verses connote racism and what not..
these symbols of good and bad, are metaphors. just like white symbolises purity
it doesnt mean white people are pure literally. etc
this is why i asked are u serious about your question, because usually you are quite insightful so i was baffled as to why u asked that question.
barakallahu feek.
i should make it VERY clear that I am not insightful at all nor have i ever been. however, i do not question the quran the way i question weak hadith. having a bright glowing face is one thing, but to say that someone good is going to be fair and the bad person is going to be dark, i dont like reading stuff like that, as i feel colour should not matter.
smell her teeth? :rofl1: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:
was that a typo sis lol oh my sides hurt from laughter.
nope sahih hadith ukhti masha Allah
Narrated Anas ibn Maalik "The Prophet wanted to marry a woman, so he sent another woman to look at her and said, "Smell her mouth (front teeth) and look at the back of her ankles."
(Reported by al-Haakim, 2/166, who said it is saheeh according to the conditions of Muslim, and al-Dhahabi agreed with him. Also reported by al-Bayhaqi, 7/87. In Majma’ al-Zawaa’id (4/507) he said, "Reported by Ahmad and al-Bazzaar, and the men of al-Bazzaar are thiqaat." )
nope sahih hadith ukhti masha Allah
Narrated Anas ibn Maalik "The Prophet wanted to marry a woman, so he sent another woman to look at her and said, "Smell her mouth (front teeth) and look at the back of her ankles."
(Reported by al-Haakim, 2/166, who said it is saheeh according to the conditions of Muslim, and al-Dhahabi agreed with him. Also reported by al-Bayhaqi, 7/87. In Majma’ al-Zawaa’id (4/507) he said, "Reported by Ahmad and al-Bazzaar, and the men of al-Bazzaar are thiqaat." )
:salams
lol woah... mashaAllah whats that menta show?
AbuMubarak
24-02-07, 11:06 PM
if you are white, you are alright
if you are brown, stick around
but if you are black, get back
if you are white, you are alright
if you are brown, stick around
but if you are black, get back
:salams
cos i got the snack attack...?
Lambo5688
24-02-07, 11:11 PM
:salams
cos i got the snack attack...?
Snake attack?
Snake attack?
:salams
no like i thought they/he might be hungry...
Lambo5688
24-02-07, 11:15 PM
:salams
no like i thought they/he might be hungry...
ok. snake attack it is.
Cristiana
24-02-07, 11:18 PM
I voted it doesn't matter because for me it makes a difference ONLY in terms of physical attraction, and that's surely not all you base your choice on :D (one hopes!!!)
:salams
why is it that people wanna marry someone they find good lookin? like theyre attractive.... and what? like what makes someones good looks make someone else wanna be with em... if ya get meh
Cristiana
24-02-07, 11:21 PM
Well does it matter to you because a lot of muslim brothers these days want to marry muslim girls with very fair skin which i think is wrong. Most of you will say it doesn't matter as long as he/she is pious with a positive character and thats how it should be but if there were two identical girls/guys one light skin and the other dark skin would you close your eyes and pick one or say skin colour doesn't matter but if i had to choose it would be ________
I was talking with my cousin today and she got a marriage proposal and she rejected the guy because he was to dark skinned because she's white like a ghost. I asked her is that not being biased??? She's like skin colour doesn't matter to me it's just my personal preference i was like :scratch: She's dumb thats all i can say about her.
I don't want to offend anyone it's just a thought...........
Between 2 men with the same character, equally pious and equally handsome I'd definitely go for the darker one :) personal taste.
Cristiana
24-02-07, 11:22 PM
:salams
why is it that people wanna marry someone they find good lookin? like theyre attractive.... and what? like what makes someones good looks make someone else wanna be with em... if ya get meh
I don't know... but the idea of beauty is very subjective...
...I don't know anybody that picked a partner on looks alone... that would be unbearable!!!
nami, the way the hadith uses bright and dark is the same way the quran does.
again ur beef cant apply to the hadith narration and not the quran. as one way or the other they both use the metaphors the same way.
asiya lool that made my day am still laughing mashallah.
if you are white, you are alright
if you are brown, stick around
but if you are black, get back
lol:rolleyes: they use to sing this at some all white school, i remember it was under some controversey when a black mother found her young son, who by the way was the only black kid at the school, in the bath room scrubbing himself real real hard, she asked why his doing that and he replied "Getting the dirt of"
this issue really broke my heart. i cant believe that school sang that in assemblys. may Allah wipe racism of the face of the earth.
.: Anna :.
25-02-07, 12:35 PM
in referrence 2 the dajjal i think the hadiths do not say his colour is dark btw, its like a very reddish colour face, wallahu alam
This is a South Asian phenomenon? Light skinned is considered beautiful and dark skin as hideous, I’m grateful that my forefathers left behind this garbage when they took Shahaadah
salaam
yes... i would think this is a "south asian phenomenon".... cant speak for other cultures :rubeyes:
Well does it matter to you because a lot of muslim brothers these days want to marry muslim girls with very fair skin which i think is wrong. Most of you will say it doesn't matter as long as he/she is pious with a positive character and thats how it should be but if there were two identical girls/guys one light skin and the other dark skin would you close your eyes and pick one or say skin colour doesn't matter but if i had to choose it would be ________
I was talking with my cousin today and she got a marriage proposal and she rejected the guy because he was to dark skinned because she's white like a ghost. I asked her is that not being biased??? She's like skin colour doesn't matter to me it's just my personal preference i was like :scratch: She's dumb thats all i can say about her.
I don't want to offend anyone it's just a thought...........
Skin colour doesn't matter.
It's the character I shall be focusing on when choosing a partner. Character, not skin colour, makes the person :) What matters is that we are defined by our actions. A persons character affects how they live their life. Their words, actions and relationships are all determined by what type of person they are.
Refusing someone merely because they are not fair is absolutely ridiculous in my opinion.
Lambo5688
26-02-07, 03:38 PM
Im gonna marry a purple sister. There iv said it. No brown, black, white, olive......PURPLE! or BLUE!
Ruprecht
26-02-07, 03:39 PM
Im gonna marry a purple sister. There iv said it. No brown, black, white, olive......PURPLE! or BLUE!
I've always been partial to British Racing Green myself :D
Sis, I think it's because darker colours is seen as more masculine and hence why it's associated with men, and not women.
Where'd you get that from...or are you just saying that cos you're somalian :/
Sahih, it is preference but say you rejected someone because they were light skinned [assuming you prefer dark skinned girls] while everything else was correct would be sheer stupidity.
sunrise
26-02-07, 04:50 PM
Where'd you get that from...or are you just saying that cos you're somalian :/
Sahih, it is preference but say you rejected someone because they were light skinned [assuming you prefer dark skinned girls] while everything else was correct would be sheer stupidity.
:up:
Where'd you get that from...or are you just saying that cos you're somalian :/
Sahih, it is preference but say you rejected someone because they were light skinned [assuming you prefer dark skinned girls] while everything else was correct would be sheer stupidity.
Subhanallah, What's my nationality have to do with that comment :scratch:
Anyways, just for your imagination, it had nothing to do with my comment, in fact I explained my opinion in detail somewhere on this thread. You can read it if your interested.
To sum it up, I wouldn't care if anyone rejected me for my appearance regardless of what particular aspect e.g. my skin colour. They would hardly know me so could only choose on what they see - if they said "i prefer something else", that's cool and that'd be it. Having said that I personally don't have a preference when it comes to skin colour. However, I wouldn't accept my character/personality being judged based on my colour, or being discriminated against. That is of a different context entirely.
Everyone has some sort of dream image of their husband/wife. Ask around for people to describe that image, and you will hear people describing skin complexion if not specifically skin colour. It's not racism at all - it's just visual preference, the same as e.g. eye colour, or height etc. It's just what they'd be more attracted to. It's not in anyway derogative to that person or people of that skin colour. It's not like e.g. "I prefer black, because I respect black people more". No. It's just what you'd be more attracted to.
But I also said to some people, lighter or brighter colours are usually prefered by women hence their association with females and vice versa for the men. People have just become over-sensitive with it because of it COULD seem related to racism, so some are quick to completely dismiss the question and say e.g. "nah I don't care", etc.
I don't need to be from Somalia or from Jupiter to realise that.
Subhanallah, What's my nationality have to do with that comment :scratch:
Anyways, just for your imagination, it had nothing to do with my comment, in fact I explained my opinion in detail somewhere on this thread. You can read it if your interested.
To sum it up, I wouldn't care if anyone rejected me for my appearance regardless of what particular aspect e.g. my skin colour. They would hardly know me so could only choose on what they see - if they said "i prefer something else", that's cool and that'd be it. Having said that I personally don't have a preference when it comes to skin colour. However, I wouldn't accept my character/personality being judged based on my colour, or being discriminated against. That is of a different context entirely.
Everyone has some sort of dream image of their husband/wife. Ask around for people to describe that image, and you will hear people describing skin complexion if not specifically skin colour. It's not racism at all - it's just visual preference, the same as e.g. eye colour, or height etc. It's just what they'd be more attracted to. It's not in anyway derogative to that person or people of that skin colour. It's not like e.g. "I prefer black, because I respect black people more". No. It's just what you'd be more attracted to.
But I also said to some people, lighter or brighter colours are usually prefered by women hence their association with females and vice versa for the men. People have just become over-sensitive with it because of it COULD seem related to racism, so some are quick to completely dismiss the question and say e.g. "nah I don't care", etc.
I don't need to be from Somalia or from Jupiter to realise that.
I agree :up:
ghanamuslima
26-02-07, 09:49 PM
Well does it matter to you because a lot of muslim brothers these days want to marry muslim girls with very fair skin which i think is wrong. Most of you will say it doesn't matter as long as he/she is pious with a positive character and thats how it should be but if there were two identical girls/guys one light skin and the other dark skin would you close your eyes and pick one or say skin colour doesn't matter but if i had to choose it would be ________
I was talking with my cousin today and she got a marriage proposal and she rejected the guy because he was to dark skinned because she's white like a ghost. I asked her is that not being biased??? She's like skin colour doesn't matter to me it's just my personal preference i was like :scratch: She's dumb thats all i can say about her.
I don't want to offend anyone it's just a thought...........
it shouldn't matter, it certainly doesn't to me:D
PaGaL~LaDo0
27-02-07, 09:52 PM
all c0o0ol0o0orzz r b0o0otiifuull :hidban: :hidban: :D:D:D
No skin color doesnt matter to me.
I love chocolate :up:
Masumah
28-02-07, 01:31 AM
No skin color doesnt matter to me.
I love chocolate :up:
:up:
Salam Alikom
I never even thought about basing my decision of marriage on the color of someones skin. Dark or light .. no matter what the color we are all brothers and sisters in Islam...
i saw some very dark pretty gals in india..
theyre not ugly..its just cultural me thinks..
sally29
05-03-07, 08:39 PM
i actually prefer and am more attracted to dark skinned sisters from india, bangladesh and somalia, im fair skinned brother from pakistan, so their is still hope for the darkies, bcos not everyone is whitewashed, well im not.
Maureen
05-03-07, 08:43 PM
Skin colour does not matter, but religion does. We should choose someone of your own religion and we will be happy.
Skin colour does not matter, but religion does. We should choose someone of your own religion and we will be happy.
Choosing someone from your own religion is pretty much a given, and a certainty to most - but just because two people are Muslim doesn't mean that's enough for them to marry.....there are physical requirements also.
Just stating the obvious..
-Shamil-
05-03-07, 08:48 PM
so their is still hope for the darkies, bcos not everyone is whitewashed, well im not.
lol @ darkies :rotfl:
dunno about skin colour but theres certain nationalities i dont think i would marry
sally29
05-03-07, 09:44 PM
their was once this salafi talk i went to at masjid ibntaymiyyah at brixton mosque and one of the sheikhs was sayin that u get some black brothers, pitch black, the darkest shade of black u can get, but their faces r shining like the bright moon, due to the noor and shine and lustre on their face, bcos the believe in islam and u get some blonde white ppl, the whitest of colour, but all u can see is darkness on their faces, isolation due to the fact that they disbelieve in allah(swt) and refuse to worship their true lord.
Assalam o alikum
i am agree with GuCcI. the thing is skin colour is not the sign of beauty, might b fro some guys but not truely speaking. some black women are have very charming personality. Islamically speaking you have right to c you partner but u have no right to say he/she is back or isnt fair and all that. i dont mean disgrace anyone its just the way i think
abuduha
24-03-07, 06:04 PM
Asalamu alaykum,
Skin colour only matters to bigots and ignorant people. It does not matter to a believing man and women who fears Allah (swt) and the last day.
sunrise
24-03-07, 06:37 PM
salaam
hmm... i think culture has a big influence. some cultures believe the more fair a woman's complexion is, the more beautiful she is. u can hav small eyes and a fat nose but as long as ur fair u r considered to be beautiful. :rolleyes:
even though a darker skinned person can hav more attractive facial features, the colour of skin i guess dominates over features :rubeyes:
Not always...i know fair and dark skinned people with the same and different features
sally29
24-03-07, 09:07 PM
well some dark women ruin it for themselves when they walk around with a screwface, lower your gaze and be pleasant, i had this dark women giving me the dirties today, messed up big time. :coolbro:
well some dark women ruin it for themselves when they walk around with a screwface, lower your gaze and be pleasant, i had this dark women giving me the dirties today, messed up big time. :coolbro:
:0: im not understanding how the womans skin colour has any significance at all.
sally29
24-03-07, 09:13 PM
they got a chip on their shoulder, politically brainwashed women, their always walking around angry, sniffing arrogantly.
abuduha
24-03-07, 09:17 PM
sally29, you've just proved my point , what I said Bigots and ignorant people. (are you a racist?) Or are you one of these small minded people who likes to make comments because you lack a spinal cord. Again think before you talk. Because everything is Allah's (swt) creation.
they got a chip on their shoulder, politically brainwashed women, their always walking around angry, sniffing arrogantly.
so far as we can see from your posts that u have a problem with white people, and u have a problem with dark skinned people so i take it youre what? asian then ? and your born muslim or revert to Islam? racisim is completely unaceptable for a muslim, as abuduha said all people are the creation of Allah ta ala and no race is superior to another nor can u make such generalisations about people based on the colour of someones skin or anything else for that matter.
so far as we can see from your posts that u have a problem with white people, and u have a problem with dark skinned people so i take it youre what? asian then ? and your born muslim or revert to Islam? racisim is completely unaceptable for a muslim, as abuduha said all people are the creation of Allah ta ala and no race is superior to another nor can u make such generalisations about people based on the colour of someones skin or anything else for that matter.
I second sister Asiya...:)
and theres something seriously wrong with that 'sally' said he would be pleased if someone flirted with his wife...:smack:
I hope he wasn't a Christian Missionary in disguise...:rolleyes:
:jkk:
It does cos Allah puts the desire in me in the first place so He knows what colour I like best!:hidban:
Irfan GBH
27-03-07, 01:14 AM
It does cos Allah puts the desire in me in the first place so He knows what colour I like best!:hidban:
:rubeyes: is that really you? THE PiElle? It's been a long time since I seen one of your posts sis! How is everything going?
:rubeyes: is that really you? THE PiElle? It's been a long time since I seen one of your posts sis! How is everything going?
Yes! It's me... Everything's been great thus far... How about you?
I second sister Asiya...:)
and theres something seriously wrong with that 'sally' said he would be pleased if someone flirted with his wife...:smack:
I hope he wasn't a Christian Missionary in disguise...:rolleyes:
:jkk:
Dun be surprised.... Some men need reassurance they have picked a beautiful wife... :1peace:
Al-Muhaajiroun
27-03-07, 01:36 AM
Well does it matter to you because a lot of muslim brothers these days want to marry muslim girls with very fair skin which i think is wrong. Most of you will say it doesn't matter as long as he/she is pious with a positive character and thats how it should be but if there were two identical girls/guys one light skin and the other dark skin would you close your eyes and pick one or say skin colour doesn't matter but if i had to choose it would be ________
I was talking with my cousin today and she got a marriage proposal and she rejected the guy because he was to dark skinned because she's white like a ghost. I asked her is that not being biased??? She's like skin colour doesn't matter to me it's just my personal preference i was like :scratch: She's dumb thats all i can say about her.
I don't want to offend anyone it's just a thought...........
Salaam,
I don't understand what you are trying to do by posting this, if your cousin has a personal preference then thats ok, it's not against Islam to have a personal preference, to a Muslim girl who she is going to marry and hoping to spend the rest of her life with him then i think it's 100% right for her to choose the husband that is pleasing to her and Insha ALLAH and a bonus if he is a pious brother. You may be happy to marry any sister as long as she is pious but thats your choice your preference but don't force it onto others. I think it's really wrong for you to call her dumb, It's like me saying to you "why don't you marry so and so?" and you say "because she is not pleasing to my eyes" and for your reasons i will respect you for that and move on, but i won't say that "your so bad how can you say that, and your bias and dumb and blah blah blah."
Thats why Muhammad SAW said to one of the companions, "go back and look at her"
Irfan GBH
27-03-07, 01:51 AM
Yes! It's me... Everything's been great thus far... How about you?
I'm good alhumdulillah. I think this is one of the frist posts I've seen from you since shortly after you reverted ukhti! :rubeyes:
I'm good alhumdulillah. I think this is one of the frist posts I've seen from you since shortly after you reverted ukhti! :rubeyes:
I'm been in and out a bit here and there... time permits and Allah willing... :) If you are wondering, I still go for my regular classes and now have a Ustaz I can counsel with regularly too....
Great to see you are around too!:)
Kasim2k7
27-03-07, 07:45 PM
I dont think skin colour matters because my wife is quite fair skin and im from a hot area so im kinda dark tanned but she says it doesnt matter but then again different people think differently. By the way this is my first reply. Ive just registered.
saghveer
27-03-07, 07:53 PM
it hard to get married in uk,:(
Dun be surprised.... Some men need reassurance they have picked a beautiful wife... :1peace:
What? :eek3:
Are you saying that Men need reassurance that they've picked a Beautiful wife from what other people say? :scratch:
I can't imagine anyone not knowing if their wife or husband is beautiful or not!
:jkk:
he cud be really black..brown whatever u cal it..but yeah he cud be fit as well..
same goes with lasses..so no color dont matter :wacko:
Bint Yusuf
28-03-07, 04:12 PM
ermm it doesnt matter skin colour however neither does having a personal prefernc, but to reject a potential spouse because of their skin colour then HARAM CALEYK!
it does not matter to me since I can't differentiate between the two colours :)
but true colour of person does matter to me :D
abdusamad
30-03-07, 11:44 PM
She got to be ya3ni.. Burble!
umm_yusuf
30-03-07, 11:52 PM
Skin colour shouldn't matter but unfortunately, it does especially with people who call themselves muslims.
If an individual has a preference to a particular colour, race or country then Alhamdulillah but to object to another person wanting to mary from another country, colour or race is just disgusting.
I've heard of a "practising brother" (beard and everything) beating his sister to a pulp because she wanted to marry a practising brother of a different race I mean Subhanallah.
Its crazy because racism mostly occurs in places that are predominantly muslim and so it is hard to tell people that Islam doesn't have racism in it and so on.
I've heard of reverts saying that they haven't experienced racism and discrimination until they came into Islam. May Allah help us.
Salaam,
I don't understand what you are trying to do by posting this, if your cousin has a personal preference then thats ok, it's not against Islam to have a personal preference, to a Muslim girl who she is going to marry and hoping to spend the rest of her life with him then i think it's 100% right for her to choose the husband that is pleasing to her and Insha ALLAH and a bonus if he is a pious brother. You may be happy to marry any sister as long as she is pious but thats your choice your preference but don't force it onto others. I think it's really wrong for you to call her dumb, It's like me saying to you "why don't you marry so and so?" and you say "because she is not pleasing to my eyes" and for your reasons i will respect you for that and move on, but i won't say that "your so bad how can you say that, and your bias and dumb and blah blah blah."
Thats why Muhammad SAW said to one of the companions, "go back and look at her"
about this "personal preference" thing...i hear this a lot lately when it comes to race/nationality u know "oh i just prefer the look of my own people i prefer to marry someone of my own race"... now i prefer jamaicans ( cos were both island people and masha Allah theyre a beautiful people) but if say a white or asian brother were to ask me in marriage, and hes a good brother, nice looking, and meets all the criteria for a husband, but hes not jamican and i turn him down because of that... now what is the difference between that and racisim exactly?
racisim is to not accept someone as equally as your "own people" because of their race, and the way i see it the "personal preference " excuse is a form of racisim. Yes being pleased with the apperance of a future spouse is important, and no doubt more so for some than others, but can people of only one race be attractive to a person ? no certainly thats not the case unless they have issues with the look of other races...
I think we should lay off "its my personal preference to marry from my own/race/tribe/nationality " because if thats all it boils down to then its basically racisim in disguise.
greenwater
31-03-07, 10:21 PM
Judging one based on their skin colour is definitely wrong. Now refusing someone because of their skin colour, well, I think the girl or guy who is getting rejected is better off because why you would want to marry a person who is judging you on your skin colour or doesn't find you at least a little attractive.
Wanting to marry someone from the same nationality/culture, I see nothing wrong with this. When I was younger, I used to think everyone should marry someone from different cultures, nationalities etc. But as I've grown older, I have realised and understood why so many people prefer to marry someone from same culture/nationality. Marriage is already a massive change, so marrying someone who has a similar culture, and is likely to have more similarities, just makes the change that much easier. Marrying someone from a different culture, likely means that you will be moving to an even bigger change, e.g. from simple things like you like spicy foods, as that's what your culture is used to, while the guy/girl comes from a culture, where they don't hardly eat spicy food. Not being able to interact with the other's parents, because of language barriers as In-Laws might not speak much english, and you don't know their mother tongues (languages) etc.
Its just like when you start work, go to uni etc, some of the first friends you make are normally people who have much in common with you, whether its ethnic group/culture/mother tongue/religion etc. Its because you find it easier to fit in, and normally are able to talk about things that interest you (e.g. Pakistanis love cricket, so you may end up talking about cricket etc).
Therefore in marriage, marrying where you feel you will fit in best, does tend to mean marrying someone who has similar background (e.g. culture, nationality etc). And therefore you cannot call this racism or such.
Judging one based on their skin colour is definitely wrong. Now refusing someone because of their skin colour, well, I think the girl or guy who is getting rejected is better off because why you would want to marry a person who is judging you on your skin colour or doesn't find you at least a little attractive.
Wanting to marry someone from the same nationality/culture, I see nothing wrong with this. When I was younger, I used to think everyone should marry someone from different cultures, nationalities etc. But as I've grown older, I have realised and understood why so many people prefer to marry someone from same culture/nationality. Marriage is already a massive change, so marrying someone who has a similar culture, and is likely to have more similarities, just makes the change that much easier. Marrying someone from a different culture, likely means that you will be moving to an even bigger change, e.g. from simple things like you like spicy foods, as that's what your culture is used to, while the guy/girl comes from a culture, where they don't hardly eat spicy food. Not being able to interact with the other's parents, because of language barriers as In-Laws might not speak much english, and you don't know their mother tongues (languages) etc.
Its just like when you start work, go to uni etc, some of the first friends you make are normally people who have much in common with you, whether its ethnic group/culture/mother tongue/religion etc. Its because you find it easier to fit in, and normally are able to talk about things that interest you (e.g. Pakistanis love cricket, so you may end up talking about cricket etc).
Therefore in marriage, marrying where you feel you will fit in best, does tend to mean marrying someone who has similar background (e.g. culture, nationality etc). And therefore you cannot call this racism or such.
our culture is Islam, the only other "cultural differences" are the food we eat and the languages we speak, if u like food and u can speak the same language its enough, as everything else ( eating,sleeping,praying,having kids, getting old sick and then dying ) will be done as per Islam.
im a convert to Islam and frankly im sick of people banging on about their "culture" like its so special.
I left behind my "culture" and came to Islam so how come born muslims are holding on so tight to their national identity, their so called "culture" ( and in the case of many asians its not even muslim culture its hindu culture they cling so tightly too) so perhaps should i do the same, and if an asian comes and asks me for marriage i tell him " sorry bro i want a white english man its just my culture because its just too hard to try a curry, and learn ur langauge so i can speak to your mum"
beacuse what ur actually saying is... i really dont think youre worth the effort ... u see what i mean
we all have something in common no matter what culture we come from in this world, we have our Islam thats what our life revolves around.
greenwater
31-03-07, 11:14 PM
our culture is Islam, the only other "cultural differences" are the food we eat and the languages we speak, if u like food and u can speak the same language its enough, as everything else ( eating,sleeping,praying,having kids, getting old sick and then dying ) will be done as per Islam.
im a convert to Islam and frankly im sick of people banging on about their "culture" like its so special.
I left behind my "culture" and came to Islam so how come born muslims are holding on so tight to their national identity, their so called "culture" ( and in the case of many asians its not even muslim culture its hindu culture they cling so tightly too) so perhaps should i do the same, and if an asian comes and asks me for marriage i tell him " sorry bro i want a white english man its just my culture because its just too hard to try a curry, and learn ur langauge so i can speak to your mum"
beacuse what ur actually saying is... i really dont think youre worth the effort ... u see what i mean
we all have something in common no matter what culture we come from in this world, we have our Islam thats what our life revolves around.
I'll beg to differ. There has never been anything as far as I know in Islam, that say's we must get rid of culture. The only aspects of Culture that we are encouraged to remove are those aspects that go against the teaching of Islam. Islam has never been about destroying cultures, but removing the negative aspects of it (e.g. the Arabs burying their daughters etc).
All I was saying is that I can understand why many people may prefer to want to marry someone from their ethnic/cultural group, and that they should not be labelled racists for wanting to. Many muslims in the west have grown up with 2 cultures, one the western culture, and one their parents, therefore creating a mixture of the two (hopefully leaving out those aspects that are haram). People will marry where they feel they will fit in easily, and feel comfortable. I just think its not right to call such people racists.
I find different cultures interesting, and learning and experiencing different cultures is a great experience. I do believe that people attack cultures because they only ever hear the negative aspects of a culture, but hardly ever the positive aspects.
" sorry bro i want a white english man its just my culture because its just too hard to try a curry, and learn ur langauge so i can speak to your mum" .
If you believe that their may be differences that could cause tension/problems in marriage, then you should definitely discuss these before marriage. Learning another language isn't easy for everyone, and like I said previously, marriage is a massive change, therefore choosing what one believes will be easy for them to fit in, should not be labelled racists.
The only aspects of Culture that we are encouraged to remove are those aspects that go against the teaching of Islam
the negative aspect to that sort of cultural thinking, is that it encourages people to only marry their own kind and this is not from Islam. in fact nationalism is haram in Islam. We are all muslims from the Ummah of Muhammad salAllahu alleyhi wa salam. not an ummah of individual nations of pakistanis, gujaratis,bengalis, somalis, or whatever, we are the muslim nation.
panther
01-04-07, 12:08 AM
people have their preferences... i don't see what's wrong with having preference for certain complexion, so long as this does not become a point of discrimination.
She got to be ya3ni.. Burble! :up:
people have their preferences... i don't see what's wrong with having preference for certain complexion, so long as this does not become a point of discrimination.
what is a preference ? its a choice right, u choose to prefer one thing over another,now thats fine if were talking about liking spicy food or bland food thats your choice, but when u choose to reject a muslim who fits all the criteria for marriage based on an an overiding preference for a colour of skin alone, and you only find people of your own race to be attractive and after all skin colour, race and nationality is something that is not in a persons control. Allah ta ala created us as we are and He ta ala says that he created us from many nations so that we may know one another ...
but refusing someone based on the colour of their skin and ur preference for your own skin colour/tribe /race, im not understanding how they call that "preference" and not discrimination and racisim?
im wondering what exactly is peoples definition of racisim and whats the difference between that and "preference" for your "own kind" ?
the negative aspect to that sort of cultural thinking, is that it encourages people to only marry their own kind and this is not from Islam. in fact nationalism is haram in Islam. We are all muslims from the Ummah of Muhammad salAllahu alleyhi wa salam. not an ummah of individual nations of pakistanis, gujaratis,bengalis, somalis, or whatever, we are the muslim nation.
Well said sis :up:
'Asiya politely tiptoes around the obvious, and awful, issue that born Muslims from India, Pakistan, and Bangladesh don't want to confront in an honest and sincere fashion.
And yet it's something the outside world already knows.
When people from that part of the world talk about "skin colour," they're really talking in a kind of code.
What they're really talking about is caste.
Deep, very, very deep, pre-Islamic caste prejudice.
What interests me about it is how something so shameful is at the same time so powerful.
And I say this as someone who's known Indians and Pakistanis for a long time. People who are willing to discuss any other controversial matter of culture, politics, or religion. But who also refuse to discuss in any serious way the issue of caste prejudice.
The ancient Aryan/Brahmin fear and disgust for the "little brown monkeys" is still very real.
Islam offered a way out from all that madness.
The message of the Prophet (pbuh) is absolutely 100% clear on this issue.
There's no way you can dodge it or confuse it or dilute it.
It is forbidden.
Search your heart.
panther
04-04-07, 02:58 PM
:up:
what is a preference ? its a choice right, u choose to prefer one thing over another,now thats fine if were talking about liking spicy food or bland food thats your choice, but when u choose to reject a muslim who fits all the criteria for marriage based on an an overiding preference for a colour of skin alone, and you only find people of your own race to be attractive and after all skin colour, race and nationality is something that is not in a persons control. Allah ta ala created us as we are and He ta ala says that he created us from many nations so that we may know one another ...
but refusing someone based on the colour of their skin and ur preference for your own skin colour/tribe /race, im not understanding how they call that "preference" and not discrimination and racisim?
im wondering what exactly is peoples definition of racisim and whats the difference between that and "preference" for your "own kind" ?
Compatibility of deen is very important, it is the overriding factor above all else, but is not the be-all-and-end-all as far as compatibility and desirability of choosing a spouse. One such desriability is attraction: there has to be some sort of attraction between couples. Some guys/girls may prefer a certain complexion, certain height, body build/habitus, certain eye colour, hair colour etc. This is preference... you seem to assume that all those who may lay emphasis on complexion have some sort of a complex for their own colour/race/tribe...etc. Well, why does this stop when we discuss colour, short people and fat people are usually "discriminated" against... despite having the deen.
I would prefer to marry asian women - Indo/Pak/Bengali women, over other nationalities/races... not because I am nationalistic, or have a complex about my colour etc... but because an Asian woman would understand my cultural habits better, would appreciate my families/relatives cultural habits better... can speak and get on with my extended families, and all those cultural aspects that may matter to individuals such as food, entertainment, holidays, language, etc. means that a woman from the same culture would be a better match.
Having a preference of certain cultural/physical characteristics in a spouse does not in itself prove some inherent racism/nationalism... those who take it so have a chip on their shoulder.
Having a preference of certain cultural/physical characteristics in a spouse does not in itself prove some inherent racism/nationalism... those who take it so have a chip on their shoulder.
ahhhh so i have a chip on my shoulder because race culture and nationality is of no importance to me whatsoever eh wow what a burden to carry lol may i always carry such a burden amin
hehe seriously though u just assumed so much, for example i have as much exerience of asian culture ( due to past religious studies ) as i do of my "own culture" and really i dont mean this in a bad way at all, but to assume that only someone of your own culture can understand u shows u need to get out and mix with different people a bit more insha Allah come on were all brothers and sisters and it makes no odds where we come from at all.
our culture is Islam the way we joke, sit, the food we eat, how we eat, its all the same in the end , and if we live islamically theres nothing apart from language that we do differently. we all eat sleep live and die. im just so tired of the racial divides we should do as much to discourage it as we do to encourage it.
what i love about Islam is that when i go to my sisters house from bangladesh and i see her sitting on the floor cutting the meat with a knife held by her feet , and we prepare aisan dishes together, i feel as home there as when i go to my egptian sisters home, and we all sit and eat with our hands sharing from the same plate, as i do when i go to visit an english person and sit at the table with a knife and fork, to me its all the same, im enjoying time with my brothers and sisters remembering Allah ta ala and how we do that or how their culture do that really doesnt matter to me, theyre muslim and im at home with the muslims Alhamdulillah :up:
Allah ta ala says in the Quran that he created us from different nations so that we may know one another and thats just the way it should be insha Allah :up: less division and more intermixing and getting to love each others ways insha Allah. we are one ummah.
I agree with asiya
but here what. as i said in my first post guys and ladys, there is a thin line between preference and discrimination.
am not attracted to some skin colors, tho this attraction can change depending on the features that accompany it. (refer 2 my 1st post on the 1st page for what skin colors am talking abt)
this doesnt mean am racist or wrong. what i like i like what i dislike i dislike.
its really that simple
discuss.....
I agree with asiya
but here what. as i said in my first post guys and ladys, there is a thin line between preference and discrimination.
am not attracted to some skin colors, tho this attraction can change depending on the features that accompany it. (refer 2 my 1st post on the 1st page for what skin colors am talking abt)
this doesnt mean am racist or wrong. what i like i like what i dislike i dislike.
its really that simple
discuss.....
naam ukhti thats a different thing, say u have one white guy blonde hair blue eyes that u could propose to, and another dark hair olive skin for example both equal in deen and everything else, and u just prefer the look of one of them to the other, but if u find yourself saying oh my God! a white boy/girl! are u serious! do u know what my father would say about that?! the family would never accept that in a million years!! then there is a serious problem.
the criteria in marriage always always has to be deen number one, nothing else, and u just cant limit yourself to one race in the ummah thinking that simply being of the same race will bring all the qualities that makes this person your beloved and compatible for you. Its their deen that u will love, its the way they fear Allah ta ala, the way they remind u to goodness and forbid u from evil.
our compatability lies in our understanding of the deen, this is what will make your marriage sucessful for it is Allah ta ala that controls the heart and puts love between the spouses, and ur spouse could be found in any of the races that Allah ta ala created.
as the prophet Salallahu alleyhi wa salam said " marry for the deen or you will be a looser...
panther
04-04-07, 03:42 PM
Having a preference of certain cultural/physical characteristics in a spouse does not in itself prove some inherent racism/nationalism... those who take it so have a chip on their shoulder.
ahhhh so i have a chip on my shoulder because race culture and nationality is of no importance to me whatsoever eh wow what a burden to carry lol may i always carry such a burden amin
hehe seriously though u just assumed so much, for example i have as much exerience of asian culture ( due to past religious studies ) as i do of my "own culture" and really i dont mean this in a bad way at all, but to assume that only someone of your own culture can understand u shows u need to get out and mix with different people a bit more insha Allah come on were all brothers and sisters and it makes no odds where we come from at all.
our culture is Islam the way we joke, sit, the food we eat, how we eat, its all the same in the end , and if we live islamically theres nothing apart from language that we do differently. we all eat sleep live and die. im just so tired of the racial divides we should do as much to discourage it as we do to encourage it.
what i love about Islam is that when i go to my sisters house from bangladesh and i see her sitting on the floor cutting the meat with a knife held by her feet , and we prepare aisan dishes together, i feel as home there as when i go to my egptian sisters home, and we all sit and eat with our hands sharing from the same plate, as i do when i go to visit an english person and sit at the table with a knife and fork, to me its all the same, im enjoying time with my brothers and sisters remembering Allah ta ala and how we do that or how their culture do that really doesnt matter to me, theyre muslim and im at home with the muslims Alhamdulillah :up:
Allah ta ala says in the Quran that he created us from different nations so that we may know one another and thats just the way it should be insha Allah :up: less division and more intermixing and getting to love each others ways insha Allah. we are one ummah.
I'm sure you are not calling me a racist... so my description over someone with a chip on their shoulder was not meant for you.
Trust me when I say this, but I meet people from so many different culture, nationality and religion in my line of work, and alhamdulillah, know many Muslim brothers from different countries... incidently, two Nigerian brothers I know married Bengali sisters, and one Egyptian brother married a Pakistani sister... and may Allah continue to bless their marriage... this worked for them and thats fine.
Of course, an individual from a different cultural background can pick up the cultural norms of thier spouse, but this does not mean to say that those who are already from the same culture are not in a better position.
I disagree with the idea that our culture is Islam... this is quite a superficial definition of culture. Islam is a religion to me, which gives principles on how we should conduct our lives, different cultures have adapted such principles in different ways. A Nigerian Muslim in Nigeria is completely different to an Afghan Muslim in Afghanistan, who is completely different from the American Muslim.
Yes, racism is a problem amongst Muslims, and we need to overcome such barriers... but take note of the fact that the prophet did not completely abolish tribes, clans etc... but taught people not to discriminate based on such loyalties. Culture and nationality are not bad per se.
Putting all this aside, having a preference for certain physical characteristics, and cultural background are not in themselves considered racism.
Mussab ibn Umayr
07-04-07, 11:15 AM
Assalamu Alikom
I believe in our beloved prophet's quote which states:
"An Arab has no superiority over a non-Arab, nor does a non-Arab have any superiority over an Arab; also a white has no superiority over a black, nor does a black have any superiority over a white except by piety and good action." :inlove:
So it is neither the colour nor the figure, it's simply the personality. :)
Wassalam
Bint Yusuf
07-04-07, 12:39 PM
Assalamu Alikom
I believe in our beloved prophet's quote which states:
"An Arab has no superiority over a non-Arab, nor does a non-Arab have any superiority over an Arab; also a white has no superiority over a black, nor does a black have any superiority over a white except by piety and good action." :inlove:
So it is neither the colour nor the figure, it's simply the personality. :)
Wassalam
salaam
i agree!
mashallah asiya on point again
mus'ab nice nick and great contribution :up: :up: 2 the both of u.
abdusamad
10-04-07, 01:58 AM
Assalamu Alikom
I believe in our beloved prophet's quote which states:
"An Arab has no superiority over a non-Arab, nor does a non-Arab have any superiority over an Arab; also a white has no superiority over a black, nor does a black have any superiority over a white except by piety and good action." :inlove:
So it is neither the colour nor the figure, it's simply the personality. :)
Wassalam
Ah if only it was true in today's world.
Even the prophet (SAWS) disliked chubbyness because it affects ones way of performing his religious duty, whether it is salah or jihad fee sabeelillaah.
So inshaAllaah those amongst us whom are not in shape should work hard to drop that.
ibnKathir27
13-04-07, 05:47 AM
Skin colour definatly matters in one way or other.
I know there are many sisters of Indo/Pak and even Somalie and Arab heritage who would willingly marry a white revert but would balk at thought of marrying a black revert of equal or greater Islamic character, worldly status and even physical attraction just because of his skin colour (I know of many black reverts who have experienced this).
On the other other hand everyone is entitled to their preferance which is why fairer sisters are often prefered to their darker skinned companions, even if in principle they are not as pretty.
I think it depends on what you are looking for and what your family would deem suitable.
me.sawda
13-04-07, 06:47 AM
Skin color will matter when someone is dark becuz h/she isn't havin shower for weeks as its winter.:torture: arghhhhhhhhh.. Believe me it happens:rolleyes:
peace2u
13-04-07, 07:00 AM
okay sawda, you lost me :confused:
I think everyone has a right to a preference it is just when that preference is used to hurt others or put them down for something that is not in their control. I don't have a problem with a brother not wanting to marry me simply because I'm black. Quite frankly, I have preferences as well and everyone should have some degree of attractiveness ( be it culture, color, creed, or country) when it comes to being happy with their choice of spouse. Eventhough marrying for deen, character and personality is best, who wants to live their lives blindfolded?
Peace
Skin colour definatly matters in one way or other.
I know there are many sisters of Indo/Pak and even Somalie and Arab heritage who would willingly marry a white revert but would balk at thought of marrying a black revert of equal or greater Islamic character, worldly status and even physical attraction just because of his skin colour (I know of many black reverts who have experienced this).
On the other other hand everyone is entitled to their preferance which is why fairer sisters are often prefered to their darker skinned companions, even if in principle they are not as pretty.
:( see this is just so very sad to hear, may Allah guide such people. there is something seriously wrong when a so called "muslim" has issues about someones race. an alegerian brother proposed to me, and his family went nuts because i was white and non arab, ( even said to him we will "even" allow you to marry a pakistani or an indian instead of her :rolleyes: as if thats some kind of compliment to paksitanis and indian )
so they took about a year to get over themselves and their predudices on that issue, then the mother asked to see photos of my kids ( kids are half black jamaican) and when she saw them,she turned up her nose like she just smelt a bad smell and looked at me in horror and went " noir!!?? " (means black in french)
This is more than a preference, "preference" is just a word people use to excuse their racisim, for sure there is inherant racisim prevellelant amongst many muslims families today. I find it hard to believe that for some muslims for generation after generation, they have no mixed blood in their families at all ....and have married "their own kind" all the way through, i come from an island 5 miles x 9 miles and even my family who would have more reason than most to inter-marry the locals, managed to marry outside of their own race into other races.
seriously any muslim who has an issue with someones race, needs to check their deen and correct their iman.
ibnKathir27
13-04-07, 01:43 PM
Sometimes its hard to tell if its racism or preferance.
I mean you can say mashaAllah what a good brother, nice guy etc etc, but a sister wouldn't necessarily be attracted to him. Perhaps fair skinned brothers are just her 'thing'.
Can the same argument be applied to people who are overweight? You can tell me a brother about a pious, gentle sister but if they saw her and she was definatly on the 'larger' side, many brothers would lose interest
:( so they took about a year to get over themselves and their predudices on that issue, then the mother asked to see photos of my kids ( kids are half black jamaican) and when she saw them,she turned up her nose like she just smelt a bad smell and looked at me in horror and went " noir!!?? " (means black in french) .
You should've said: Astaghfirullah adheem! Votre coeur est noir!
Rosheen
13-04-07, 10:12 PM
Sometimes its hard to tell if its racism or preferance.
I mean you can say mashaAllah what a good brother, nice guy etc etc, but a sister wouldn't necessarily be attracted to him. Perhaps fair skinned brothers are just her 'thing'.
Can the same argument be applied to people who are overweight? You can tell me a brother about a pious, gentle sister but if they saw her and she was definatly on the 'larger' side, many brothers would lose interest
good point........
society can be cruel to the curvier ladeeeee
me.sawda
14-04-07, 10:09 AM
question (slightly off topic)
why (in certain prophecies) do they say that imam mahdi will be fair skinned and the dajaal will be dark skinned if the skin colour does not matter?
why are the good guys in prophecies always fair skinned and the bad guys dark skinned?
It's to recognize Imam Mahdi and dazzal. Nothing more than that.
Belal (ra) companion of Mohammad(saw) was so black but he's Athan ( prayer call) was the most lovely one for Muslim ummah and our prophet(saw).
me.sawda
14-04-07, 10:28 AM
Assalamu Alikom
I believe in our beloved prophet's quote which states:
"An Arab has no superiority over a non-Arab, nor does a non-Arab have any superiority over an Arab; also a white has no superiority over a black, nor does a black have any superiority over a white except by piety and good action." :inlove:
So it is neither the colour nor the figure, it's simply the personality. :)
Wassalam
As-salamualikum
Nice!
Tax-Man
21-04-07, 03:27 AM
Somalie and Arab heritage who would willingly marry a white revert but would balk at thought of marrying a black revert of equal or greater Islamic character Lets time I checked somalis were black:rubeyes:
ummi_nadiah
21-04-07, 05:34 AM
does skin color matter?
it doesn't matter whether u are white/ black or brown...as long as u r good , and pious
it is useless if u look good externally, physically, but inside u there r full of evil.
Madeena
21-04-07, 11:09 AM
To me personally colour does not matter what matters is the inside we all are the same, we have feelings we all cry laugh smile inner beauty is far important than the outer beauty any day.
ibnKathir27
21-04-07, 12:24 PM
Lets time I checked somalis were black:rubeyes:
You'd be suprised at how many Somalies do not consider themselves as black in the sense of African/West Indian, but probably closer to Arab.
I've heard of Somalie sisters who say their parents would never allow them to marry a black brother even if before they were practising, they mainly dated black guys
Tax-Man
21-04-07, 12:28 PM
You'd be suprised at how many Somalies do not consider themselves as black in the sense of African/West Indian, but probably closer to Arab.
I've heard of Somalie sisters who say their parents would never allow them to marry a black brother even if before they were practising, they mainly dated black guys I guess some people are idiots, Also being somali I can tell you the reason why it's not the s