Backbitting

[muslimlearner]

:salams

Does talking negitivaly about someone even when joking counts as backbiting?
What defines backbiting anyway?

[me.sawda]

Talking negatively at someones back is backbiting. A big sin it is. By joking too one shouldn't lie. :D :D

[muslimlearner]

is backbiting about kaffir also a sin?

How about if you are complaning to a friend about something your other friend done?

[nami]

I got this excellent lecture about backbitting. I can try uploading it if anyone is interested.

It explains that backbitting is not necessarily talking about someone behind thair back.

[`asiya]

Question:
What is the definition of gheebah and what is the ruling on it?

Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Gheebah (backbiting, gossip) means that a person mentions the faults of his Muslim brother in his absence, which he would not like if he heard about it, when there is no need to mention them.

When I say “mentions the faults of his brother”, this excludes cases when the other person says something to praise or commend him.

When I say “Muslim brother”, this excludes the kaafir, for there is no gheebah in the case of a kaafir.

When I say, “in his absence”, this excludes things said in his presence, which is not called gheebah according to the more correct of the two scholarly opinions.

When I say, “which he would dislike if he heard about it”, this excludes things which he would not mind.

When I say, “when there is no need to mention them”, this excludes cases when there is a shar’i reason for doing that, such as warning against an innovator to make people aware of his bid’ah.

It is essential to pay attention to the following in such cases:

1. Sincerity towards Allaah and seeking His pleasure.

2. Paying attention to the interests being served by such things.

3. What is said should be limited to the shortcomings in question and should not go further, to matters in which there is no benefit.

The scholars agreed that it is haraam to talk behind a person’s back for no legitimate purpose. Most of them stated that this is a major sin and that it varies in degree, some kinds being worse than others. The one who backbites about a scholar is not like one who backbites about an ignorant person. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“… neither backbite one another. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would hate it (so hate backbiting). And fear Allaah. Verily, Allaah is the One Who forgives and accepts repentance, Most Merciful”

[al-Hujuraat 49:12]

In Saheeh Muslim it is narrated from al-‘Alaa’ ibn ‘Abd al-Rahmaan from his father from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:

“Do you know what gheebah is?” They said, “Allaah and His Messenger know best.” He said, “That you say something about your brother that he dislikes.” He was asked, “What if what I say about my brother is true?” He said, “If what you say is true then you have gossiped about him, and if it is not true then you have slandered him.”

Abu Dawood narrated in his Sunan via Nawfal ibn Masaahiq from Sa’eed ibn Zayd that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The most prevalent kind of usury (riba) is going to lengths in talking unjustly against a Muslim’s honour.”

And he (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Your blood, your wealth and your honour are sacred among you, as sacred as this day of yours in this month of yours in this land of yours. Let those who are present convey it to those who are absent; perhaps he will convey it to one who has more understanding than he does.”

(Agreed upon, from the hadeeth of Abu Bakrah).

One of the worse types of gheebah and one which is most emphatically forbidden it to look down upon a Muslim and do one’s utmost to insult him, show disrespect towards him and cast aspersions upon his honour. This is a blameworthy characteristic and a serious malady; it is one of the major sins and the one who does this is subject to the warning and a severe punishment.



Shaykh Sulaymaan ibn Naasir al-‘Alwaani

************************************************** ********


Ruling on backbiting about non-Muslims

Question:
Please inform us if the gheebah (backbiting) is the same for non-believers as it is for Muslims.

Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly, it is not a Muslim characteristic to speak rudely. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The Muslim does not slander, curse, speak obscenely or speak rudely.” (Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, who said, this is a ghareeb hasan hadeeth; it was classed as saheeh by al-Albaani).

Whoever does a thing a lot, it will become his habit, so the Muslim should keep away from all the ways that lead to evil, whether minor or major. Whoever drives his sheep near the enclosure of the king is bound to cross the line.

Secondly, if your question is referring to backbiting about a kaafir by mentioning his physical defects, such as his having a long nose or a big mouth, etc., then do not do this, because this is making fun of the creation of Allaah. If it means talking about his bad characteristics which he flaunts openly, such as zina and immorality, or drinking alcohol, and warning against him, there is nothing wrong with that. There follow some of the comments of the scholars on this topic:

Zakariya al-Ansaari said: “Backbiting about a kaafir is haraam if he is a dhimmi [a non-Muslim living under Islamic rule], because that puts them off from accepting the jizyah and it is going against the treaty of dhimmah (agreement between non-Muslim subjects and the Islamic state) and the words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). ‘Whoever makes a snide comment to a dhimmi has earned Hell.’ (Narrated by Ibn Hibbaan in his Saheeh). It is permissible (to backbite about a kaafir) if he is a harbi (one who is at war with the Muslims), because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to command Hassaan to lampoon the mushrikeen.”

(Asna al-Mutaalib ma’a Haashiyatihi, vol. 3, p. 116)

Ahmad ibn Hajar al-Haythami said in al-Zawaajir ‘an Iqtiraaf al-Kabaa’ir (vol. 2, p. 27): “Al-Ghazaali was asked about backbiting about a kaafir. He said: with regard to a Muslim, it is forbidden for three reasons: causing offence; criticizing the creation of Allaah, for Allaah is the Creator of the deeds of His slaves; and wasting time in something that is of no benefit. The first is haraam, the second is makrooh, and the third is not the best thing that one can do. With regard to the dhimmi, he is like the Muslim as far as not harming him is concerned, because the Lawgiver protects his honour, blood and property. It was said in al-Khaadim, the first view is correct.

Ibn Hibbaan narrated in his Saheeh that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, ‘Whoever makes a snide comment to a Jew or a Christian deserves Hell.’ The meaning of making a snide comment is to make someone hear something that will cause offence to him. There is no stronger evidence than this, i.e., it is haraam. Al-Ghazaali said: with regard to the harbi, the former is not haraam, and the second and third are makrooh. With regard to one who commits bid’ah (innovation), if he is becomes a kaafir thereby, then he is like a harbi, otherwise he is like a Muslim, but speaking of him with regard to his bid’ah is not makrooh.

Ibn al-Mundhir said, concerning the words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), “It is your mentioning about your brother that which he dislikes,” – this indicates that in the case of one who is not your brother, such as a Jew or a Christian or a follower of any other religion, or one whose bid’ah has put him beyond the pale of Islam, there is no backbiting in his case.”

Islam Q&A
Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid

[muslimlearner]

Don't think it answered my question about complaining about somone to a friend, parent etc.

[`asiya]

Don't think it answered my question about complaining about somone to a friend, parent etc.

In Saheeh Muslim it is narrated from al-‘Alaa’ ibn ‘Abd al-Rahmaan from his father from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:

“Do you know what gheebah (backbiting) is?” They said, “Allaah and His Messenger know best.” He said, “That you say something about your brother that he dislikes.” He was asked, “What if what I say about my brother is true?” He said, “If what you say is true then you have gossiped about him, and if it is not true then you have slandered him.”

“… neither backbite one another. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would hate it (so hate backbiting). And fear Allaah. Verily, Allaah is the One Who forgives and accepts repentance, Most Merciful”

[al-Hujuraat 49:12]

[TEH]

If you complain to such and such because Mr X has wronged you or something, and you need to sort it out with that person, and you will do so through your parents or friends, then I dont think there is harm in that...intention is key...

What is more serious, is how we have backbitten the word backbiting with the spelling, Backbitting..

[muslimlearner]

what if you speak about someone that you don't know? (like saying Mido(footballer) has a stinking attitude?:D )

[nami]

This lecture is titled "Silence is Salvation" by "Shaykh Abu Yusuf Riyadh ul Haq" recorded in 2003

it talks about how powerful the tongue is and how the tongue alone can destroy a persons akhira. this lecture clears the misconception about backbiting using quotes from hadith. the misconception is that backbiting is saying something about a person when they are not with you.

quote from the mp3 files attached

the prophet (pbuh) was asked - what is backbiting?
the prophet (pbuh) said - you mentioning something about your brother which he does not like

the prophet (pbuh) was asked - what if what i say about my brother is true?
the prophet (pbuh) said - if what you have said is true then you are backbiting
if what you have said is a lie you are slandering

so you can say it in front of him or behind his back it does not matter according to the prophet (pbuh)

Side A.mp3 (http://www.sendspace.com/file/a8te29)
Side B.mp3 (http://www.sendspace.com/file/ngf926)

[muslimlearner]

Is talking negitavley about someone you don't know(like a famous person) still backbiting?

[M. Siddiqi]

Is talking negitavley about someone you don't know(like a famous person) still backbiting?


Yes. It is one of the worst levels of backbiting too.

[muslimlearner]

Yes. It is one of the worst levels of backbiting too.

Why is backbiting about someone you don't know worse than at someone you know?

[M. Siddiqi]

Why is backbiting about someone you don't know worse than at someone you know?


I did not say it is worse. I said it is one of the worst ways or levels of backbiting. We are not the judge of anybody because we do not know what is good or bad for either ourselves or others, so how can you say anything about anybody who you've never even met?

The tongue is one of the hardest things to keep under control but one of the easiest and most common causes of punishment in the grave and jahannam.


Anas Ibn Malik reported that the Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa salam) said: "The faith of a servant is not put right until his heart is put right, and his heart is not put right until his tongue is put right."

Umar Ibn al-Khattab (radiAllahu anhu) said: "A person who talks too much is a person who often makes mistakes, and someone who often makes mistakes, often has wrong actions. The Fire has a priority over such a freqent sinner."

Umar ibn al-Khattab visited Abu Bakr (radiAllahu anhum) and found him pulling his tongue with his fingers. Umar said "Stop! may Allah forgive you!" Abu Bakr replied; "This tongue has brought me to dangerous places."

[me.sawda]

I did not say it is worse. I said it is one of the worst ways or levels of backbiting. We are not the judge of anybody because we do not know what is good or bad for either ourselves or others, so how can you say anything about anybody who you've never even met?

The tongue is one of the hardest things to keep under control but one of the easiest and most common causes of punishment in the grave and jahannam.


Anas Ibn Malik reported that the Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa salam) said: "The faith of a servant is not put right until his heart is put right, and his heart is not put right until his tongue is put right."

Umar Ibn al-Khattab (radiAllahu anhu) said: "A person who talks too much is a person who often makes mistakes, and someone who often makes mistakes, often has wrong actions. The Fire has a priority over such a freqent sinner."

Umar ibn al-Khattab visited Abu Bakr (radiAllahu anhum) and found him pulling his tongue with his fingers. Umar said "Stop! may Allah forgive you!" Abu Bakr replied; "This tongue has brought me to dangerous places."
Mashallah:D

[LiveIslam]

lets say a member of your family got married, and they found out that their partner was cheating on them and also found out the whole family was corrupted can the member of the family cum and tell you about their partner and their family what they are really like, just to get advise and help?
i dnt know if that makes sense lol
jazallah khair

[LiveIslam]

inshallah sumone will reply

[LiveIslam]

inshallah sumone will reply
??????????????????????????????????????????:(

[Peacenik]

lets say a member of your family got married, and they found out that their partner was cheating on them and also found out the whole family was corrupted can the member of the family cum and tell you about their partner and their family what they are really like, just to get advise and help?
i dnt know if that makes sense lol
jazallah khair

Tricky one.

First of all, ask ALLAH (SWT) to Guide you in the best method and also Ask Him to change the hearts of the people in question.

Regarding the above situation, in my opinion, if these 'bad' acts are done in private, then I guess you shouldn't really say anything (even though you really want to).

Obviously, I haven't been in that situation (well, not as far as I can remember) and if I was, I really don't know how I would react.

It's easy to say something when things don't concern you, but when they do, we might do the opposite.

But then again, we might stick to what ALLAH (SWT) has Commanded us to do.

May ALLAH (SWT) Protect us all from haraam acts and thoughts.

Ameen.